From One Harbor To Another
by M and M Works
Summary: What would it have been like to watch Dawson's Creek during its original run? What if we didn't know what was to come? This is a series of ficlets, drabbles and epi tags as if we didn't know that the final epi of the season would be True Love.
1. Uncharted Waters

***~* From One Harbor To Another *~*  
The Season Three Ficlet Collection  
by M&M Works**

_A/N: The inspiration for this collection of work came from reading fics in another fandom for a current show (traitorous, right? LOL). Every new episode that airs brings a fresh wave of epi tags. Don't know about you all, but we both came to DC late in the day; this sparked the question what it would have been like to watch Dawson's Creek during its original run. At this point, we all read and write DC fan fiction from the vantage point of knowing the entire canon. But what if we didn't know what was to come? What if we began watching season three with only the canon to that point upon which to base our thoughts, opinions, and conjectures? After rewatching season three with that eye, the creation began of a series of ficlets, epi tags, and drabbles for each epi – almost like missing scenes - __as if we didn't know that the final epi of the season would be True Love.__J_

_As we wrote, we also realized that this was the perfect opportunity to experiment with different points of view, persons, and writing styles. Consequently, some of these are quite different than anything else we've tried. Feedback relating to that would be much appreciated._

_The fics – or ficlets as we like to call them - are connected to each other only in that they are all from season three. Some epis even have more than one ficlet. They can each stand alone but the idea is to show what we believe happens off-screen to get Pacey and Joey on that boat at the end of the season._

_The series is not finished; we are still writing. But we will post what we have as regularly as possible, every Friday for now. The series is rated NC-17 for language because we all know there was no sex in season three. :P And bear with us - you do all know how the story ends eventually. ;) As always, please let us know what you think! Now, on with the untold defining moments of season three. The first one kicks off at the end of epi one beside a moonlit dock..._

*~* **Uncharted Waters ***~*

**I. Standing In**

"See you tomorrow, Potter."

Pacey hopped into the rowboat, picked up the oars and started his journey back down the creek toward the Leery's dock.

"Don't hit a snag out there, Witter. If you come up missing, no one would look for you until you were fish food." Pacey rolled his eyes and chuckled tiredly as her voice drifted through the dark. She always did have to have the last word.

His conjecture that they might end up to be friends didn't look promising. Despite their tentative connection over the years as Dawson's mutual best friends, Joey was a pain in the ass. He didn't relish the idea of filling in for Dawson on Potter patrol. Besides, Andie was coming back soon and he had every intention of spending all his spare time showing her just how much he had missed her over the summer.

Because at this point, even D was getting more action than he was with that hot blonde, Eve. And that just wasn't right.

God, he missed Andie. All those barely-clad girls dancing tonight had certainly gotten him hot under the collar. He was a guy after all, and breathing. But although he'd danced with them - to entice the paying clientele and boost Dawson's profits - he'd been up close but definitely not personal. He was a one-woman guy and she'd be home, back in his arms, very soon.

He sighed happily to himself and turned his gaze upwards, taking in the stars as he slowly made his way. Man, it felt great to be out on the water, even if it was only the creek. One of these days he was going to get himself a boat and sail the seas. Andie didn't enjoy sailing; it seemed Jack wasn't the only one who got seasick in that family. But he was confident he could find a way to twist her arm as he was certain sailing the open water wouldn't feel the same without the person you love by your side.

Pulling out of his daydream, Pacey focused once more on the evening's events and his newly acquired babysitting duties. Contemplative, he chewed the inside of his cheek. Maybe he could get Jen to step up and do the girlfriend thing with Joey. Girls loved to spend time together talking, right? And God knows Potter loved to talk. Surely they were over whatever issues they'd had between them. Yeah, that's what he'd do. Catch Jen at school. Enlist her sympathetic nature. Turn on the old Witter charm. Get her to hang out with Joey, check up on her.

Hey, maybe Jen would even have a girly influence on Joey. Or at least her wardrobe. Because he'd be the first to admit, Potter was growing up to be quite a looker. Too bad she didn't even realize it. And her ego took a big hit tonight. He had a feeling it was going to be hard for her to recover from Dawson's poorly-handled rejection.

Thank God he and Andie didn't have their problems.

He'd seen Joey sometimes in the past few months, dragging home after long hours at the marina. Joey could never be accused of perkiness but she'd always been passionate and this summer she had just seemed defeated. They had only exchanged the briefest greetings as they headed in different directions. He wasn't feeling very cheerful himself and was fairly certain she wouldn't welcome any sympathy from him anyway.

He'd never say so to her or to Dawson – mostly because it would be a waste of breath - but they didn't really belong together anyway. Pacey was sure he was right when he told D it wasn't the right time for them. They both needed to move beyond that childhood dance that was more like the bunny hop than the tango. He was proud of Dawson (and not a little envious) for taking a chance with the hot chick.

And Joey, who knows? She was desperate and destined to get out Capeside. He was sure her future and some highbrow guy existed for her far beyond its city limits.

No, he might try to bail on his assignment but he just wasn't gonna bet against that Potter girl.

*~*

**II. Standing Tall**

"See you tomorrow, Potter."

Joey watched as Pacey hopped into the liberated rowboat, picked up the oars and started his journey back down the creek toward the Leery's dock.

"Don't hit a snag out there, Witter. If you come up missing, no one would look for you until you were fish food." As a way of a reply, she heard the faint murmur of a chuckle from the rapidly disappearing rowboat.

Could this night get any worse? Not only had she humiliated herself in the bedroom fortress that had previously been her haven, but she got Pacey Witter as the consolation prize. She'd cried. In front of him, of all people. Maybe he _would_ end up as fish food – she could only hope.

She pulled her knee up and propped her chin on it, now only randomly sniffling.

What was that all about, him coming over to console her? She certainly had no intention of trading Dawson for Pacey. Although, she had to admit he _had_ filled out over the summer and leaning against his solid body with his warm arm around her shoulder had definitely been comforting.

Hearing the distant, intermittent splashes of Pacey's oars over the hum of the crickets, she shuddered a little, disgusted with herself for finding comfort on the shoulder of her lifelong nemesis.

However, one benefit of putting up with and spending time with Pacey - she was sure to get Leery updates. That would have to do for the time being. Of course, Andie was coming back and, whether Joey understood it or not, that crazy blonde girl was crazy about Pacey. And then how much time would he really have to hang out with her once Andie was in his eye line?

She sighed to herself. Let's face it, she didn't have a huge pool of friends to choose from. Maybe she'd call Jen. Oh God, how desperate was she? Still, maybe she could get Jen to give her some tips in going blonde. She briefly wondered if that would help her chances to get back into Dawson's life. She could see it now…

_Approaching the white clapboard house where she had spent the best days of her childhood, shiny blonde hair swinging in the afternoon sun, Dawson sees her from the porch. Raking his eyes down her lithe form clad only in a tiny bikini top and denim shorts, he lets out a low wolfish whistle, "Hey beautiful…"_

She rolled her eyes at herself. Never in a million years…

Gradually over the summer she had not only come to forgive Dawson for his part in the Paternal Potter Drug Scandal Part II but she realized that she may have been just a bit harsh with him. She had even gone so far as to let herself fantasize their reunion in her head. Never had she thought that their lifelong friendship would _not_ hold fast in the long run. Notwithstanding the newest blonde bimbo in his life.

Joey slowly stood up, tossed her hair back, wiped the last vestige of her tears from her face and set her chin resolutely. Hey, she didn't need any of them. She needed a plan, that's all. She was smart and she was going to spend the next two years working her ass off to get out of Capeside, which so far had held nothing but loss and pain for her.

Then her real life could finally begin.


	2. Warning Signs

Hello, lovelies. Thank you so much for your enthusiastic response to our idea. We hope you enjoy this next part from the second epi that starts with a P/J road trip…

***~*Warning Signs*~***

"Not 495, Pacey! I-95. You were supposed to take I-95 west." Joey's arm shot out pointing at the reflective green sign declaring I-95 to Providence.

"Potter, please. I know where I'm going. Who's drivin' here? In fact, who is the only one here who even knows how to drive?" Pacey retorted.

"Listen, Witter, just because I don't drive doesn't mean I can't read a road sign. And it certainly doesn't mean I don't know the difference between north and west. This road goes north. Providence is west of here."

"Believe me I know where I'm going." He slapped her hand away as she attempted to adjust the radio station. "At least I was ready to leave on time. Now we're in a hurry because it took you so long to get out of class."

"If you had just let me talk to Ms. DeJoy myself, I would have been out a lot sooner. Bringing that forged note wasn't your brightest idea today."

"Hey, I did a great job on that note! How was I supposed to know that she knows Bessie that well?"

Joey rolled her eyes. "Yeah, well enough to spell her name right. Two S's, Pace, two. I had every intention of going to the ladies room and slipping out the side door."

"Why'd you even go to that class? You knew I wanted to leave at noon. Lunch, you know, slip off the school property quietly, no muss, no fuss. On the road. On time." Pacey griped.

"I needed to turn in my homework. You do remember what that is? The assignments you get when you go to class that you do at home and then TURN IN the next day in class."

It was Pacey's turn to roll his eyes. "I know what homework is. Let's just say I'm not a slave to convention like you and Daw…" He stopped, briefly casting his eyes from the road onto her face.

"You can say his name, you know. I won't dissolve into a puddle of tears." Joey folded her arms across her chest defensively. "'Cause that's not going to happen again. Ever."

"Whatever you say, Josephine. Can't say I'm all that worried. What I _am_ worried about is getting to Andie before 3:00." He glanced at the clock on the dash for the tenth time in as so many minutes and then leaned forward, bracing his forearms against the steering wheel and surveying the road before him.

Joey sighed and murmured under her breath, "Then you shoulda gone I-95."

~

An hour later Pacey was bent over the hood of the SUV, smoothing the edges of the map down and peering intently at the web of colors before him. "Fuck," he muttered under his breath.

He looked toward the door of the rest stop restrooms. What the hell was taking Potter so long? He'd never admit it to her but he should have taken I-95. Now he'd missed his turn and gone 30 miles to the next exit. That meant they had to go back 30 miles. An hour. By the time they got back to the right exit, the whole detour will have taken at least an hour. The gurgling in his stomach had gotten worse by the mile. Maybe he really would explode.

"Any idea where we are?" Joey's voice carried over the late afternoon air.

"Rhode Island," he said dryly.

She just nodded sagely and got in the car.

Snatching up the map and thrusting it at her as he got in the car as well, Pacey groused, "What took you so damn long in there?"

Joey snapped the map and folded it expertly along its well-worn creases. "Do you want details?"

Pacey rolled his eyes and got back on the freeway going the opposite way.

Joey smirked.

There was no real rancor in their bickering. She knew he was nervous about seeing Andie and she was just glad to be getting out of Capeside for the day. It didn't hurt that her companion was someone that she knew well enough to be completely comfortable with. These days especially, she could count that particular type of person on one hand, not including her thumb.

~

"Is that it?"

"Mayfield Institute," Joey read off the stately stone sign.

Pacey's knuckles on the wheel were white. Joey reached over and put her hand on his arm. "Hey. We're here. Everything's going to be okay." Her voice was soothing.

Pacey relaxed a little under her warm touch. "Yeah." He pushed out a breath he didn't realize he had been holding. "Yeah, of course. Everything's fine."

They got out of the car and Joey boosted herself up onto the car's hood, watching as Pacey headed toward the main door of the hospital. Suddenly he turned and walked backward for a moment saying, "Hey Potter! Thanks for coming with me."

"Go get your girl, Witter." Joey waved him off, a soft smile lingering on her face long after he'd entered the building.

~~*~~

Despite her proclamation of reunion accomplished, Joey wondered at Andie's lack of enthusiasm for it. As soon as she had walked in on them in those luxurious accommodations Joey could sense tension rolling off Pacey. It seemed he may be destined to explode from one thing or another today - or maybe it was just a generalized emotional overload. She was just glad she had been able to help in some small way today, to return the favor of getting him past security to see someone he loved.

And who was that guy in her room? He looked like a perfect bookend for Andie – preppy and pale. She gazed at Pacey, free to consider him from her back seat view, and tried to see what appeal he might have as potential romantic partner. From a purely physical perspective, he definitely had it going on over Marc. He had the height advantage and that hideous Caesar cut had grown out, thank God. Plus he still had those bulging biceps she'd teased Dawson about. Add that to his tan and those long fingers, there was no contest. She knew Pacey was really smart; no one else could badinage head to head with her as well as him. But he lacked confidence and was a lazy smartass with no seeming focus, although he had definitely done better in school under Andie's tutelage.

His romance with the brainy, perky girl had always baffled her. After they found out Andie was crazy, it had made more sense but now there seemed to more trouble in paradise than insanity.

She inwardly chastised herself for her last thought; that thinking right there might be why she didn't have a huge pool of friends from which to draw.

~

Tears silently leaked out the corners of Andie's eyes as she watched Mayfield Institute recede from view. Why hadn't Daddy picked her up tomorrow as planned? Or even Jack? She didn't even really get the chance to say goodbye properly. She could feel Pacey's expectations laced heavily with a dose of confusion and disappointment emanating from him like a wool blanket, which threatened to suffocate her. She had missed him, it was true but as the summer wore on she had come to appreciate the delicacy of Marc. Now, _he_ really understood her.

A bubble of fear rose up in Andie as she pondered. It was all happening so fast. Maybe she really wasn't ready to go back. There was a certain safety and routine to life at the hospital, a cocoon of space in which she was permitted to work out her fears and find her way back to reality at her own pace. She had been gently encouraged and guided by the doctors and staff.

The disruption of Pacey and Joey coming to pick her up today instead of tomorrow was throwing her off emotionally. If she wasn't even flexible enough to deal with this slight change in plans how in the world was she supposed to deal with a whole new school year and a full-time boyfriend?

Andie sighed heavily. Well, she was on her way back to Capeside now, Pacey at her side, solid as a rock. He had spent months counting the moments until he could see her and what had she done? Oh my god.

What had she done?

~

Strumming his fingers against the steering wheel pretending to listen to the radio like everyone else, Pacey stole a peek at Andie. He could only see the back of her head. Ever since she'd gotten into the car her face had been permanently plastered to the car window and he'd been lucky to get a few monosyllabic replies to his conversation. Definitely not the reunion he had envisioned. The picture that had been on a continuous loop in his head since her dad had agreed to let him pick her up involved her sweet and smiling face alight with pleasure and a run and a hop into his arms, all the while chattering away between peppering kisses.

Nowhere in this scenario did he picture another guy - especially one that looked rich and smart.

That insecure voice that had been encouraged for so many years by Doug and his Pop quietly reminded him, 'And they were on her bed.'

Glancing in the rearview mirror, he collided with Joey's gaze and quickly returned his eyes to the road. He could tell she suspected something wasn't right, too. To her credit she played peacemaker but he was pretty sure she'd use anything she knew or even imagined to mock and emasculate him. It was what they did despite their tentative détente. Still if it wasn't for her, he wouldn't have even gotten past the front desk and would probably still be driving around lost. Of course, maybe that would have been a good thing considering Andie's less-than-enthusiastic reception.

The gurgling he had been feeling in his belly all day was starting to turn into a leaden rock of dread.


	3. Causatum

Hello again, lovelies. So much happened in the second epi that we thought it needed one more ficlet. We hope you enjoy reading what our take on what may have happened after the Pep Rally.

***~*Causatum*~***

I.

It wasn't seeing Andie make a beeline for the girl's restroom as I pushed my way out of the auditorium against the crowd.

It wasn't the volume of the engine as you gunned the Wagoneer when I found you outside.

Unable to see past my own churning emotions, it was neither of those things.

It was the heavy, loaded silence during the ride home that made me realize…

Something was very wrong.

Wanting to get off the school grounds as quickly as possible, I'd banged on the hood, then swung the passenger door open and asked for a ride. You hadn't said anything - simply nodded as I'd jumped in. But that wasn't out of character - let's face it, we'd never been ones for exchanging pleasantries.

It was then I noticed your face stoic, but your eyes a tumult of pain and fury.

I knew what was wrong with me, hell the whole auditorium knew, but I didn't understand _your_ silence. Yet.

Once I'd calmed and settled enough to take in my surroundings I could almost feel the pain emanating off of you.

Several long minutes passed, the only sound came from the rush of air through the half-open window as the car sped along. I watched you cautiously from the corner of my eye, waiting. Then more waiting. I was beginning to think you'd forgotten I was in the car until you finally spilled your guts. Your words were low and terse, dripping through a clenched jaw. You didn't look at me but stared straight ahead through the windshield. It's as though you were worried you might see some accusation on my face. Or maybe it was purely embarrassment that kept you from meeting my gaze. Something with which I was acutely familiar.

Now I stand in my driveway watching as you back up, an arm thrown over the back of the seat. You don't look in my direction again.

I'm sure my heartfelt words regarding forgiveness fell on deaf ears. And honestly, I can't blame you for not being responsive right now. I just hope that you don't make any hasty decisions and do something you later regret. Maybe you'll take a few days to think things over and then talk to Andie. Shaking my head at these thoughts, I sigh. What am I thinking? It's you; of course you'll act first then think later. I'm the one who over-analyzes everything. You… well, you simply rely on instinct.

Not ready to face the hustle and bustle of bath and bedtime inside the Potter household, I decide to head for my dock to reflect on my less-than-stellar day. Neither of us had one, did we? I'm starting to get used to it but I can't help but feel a pang of sympathy for you. You had such high hopes just yesterday morning.

How could Andie do that to you? She really _must_ be crazy. But… I don't know, I'm not excusing Andie for what she did, but isn't it better to come clean about an affair than to keep it a secret? Like dad did with mom. She'd known, he never said anything. But she'd known. Hell, we'd all known.

Sitting down, I lean back on my hands and close my eyes. A civil Potter/Witter relationship seems inevitable at this point. All I can hope is you'll at least let me try to be there for you, the same way you've been there for me, but somehow I don't think we're there yet. You're so very closed off at the moment.

My sneaker rocks the edge of my rowboat tied up in its usual place, the movement causing ripples to spread across the creek. I know my concern for you is the only thing that is keeping my focus from the trauma of witnessing yet another horrifying moment in the sexual education of Mr. Dawson Leery. Can you blame me? Pep Rally turned Peep Show. Gah! Post break up, most people aren't privy to their exes new relationship in all its slutty glory. So why me?

Maybe it's for the best. Every new dagger thrust into my heart only serves to carve out my hope and expectations with regard to Dawson until I'm left with… nothing. No humiliation, no shame, no love. Nothing but the necessity to move on.

So why is it I can't see a future without Dawson in it?

Much like the last night I was in this exact place, I roar to myself, 'I am Joey Potter! I will survive. Because _that_ I know how to do.'

Laughing at my internal drama queen I sadly shake my head. Big words… Yet here I am… the very act of pulling the oars through the murky water prevents me from being able to see where I'm going as I head toward the other side of the creek to share my newfound revelations with the same person I always have.

Seems I'm still more comfortable looking backward.

II.

'I knew it! I fucking _knew _it. The minute I saw that rich little fuck lying on your bed. Man, Andie, how _could_ you? How could you take this thing, this special thing we had and waste it? And you claim to _love_ me? Well, newsflash, sweetheart - you don't cheat on someone you love. I don't give a shit what Potter says. I don't have to forgive you. Hell, I'm not gonna forgive you.'

Fuming, I drove aimlessly ranting to myself against Andie, against that fuck Marc, even against Joey just because she was convenient and, well, I'd had plenty of practice at it.

'Every fucking day this summer, I waited. I waited for you to get better and come home to me. To us. You were supposed to be getting better, Andie, not getting _laid_. Was that part of your therapy? What the hell kind of hospital is that place anyway? It makes me sick just thinking about it.'

The twinkle lights of the boardwalk caught my attention and, without thinking, I aimed for the parking lot. Downtown was deserted and I carelessly pulled over and headed toward the water. I don't know if I wanted to rub salt in the wounds or purge myself of all _our _places.

I stopped mid-stride when I saw you sitting on that bench - the same bench where I found you after the dance. In the same place we danced without music. On the night we first kissed and our hearts beat as one.

Shaking my head and letting out a humorless laugh, I walked toward you. Hey, might as well suck the memories right out of this spot while we have the chance, eh?

You know, I'm not even sure what I said to you? The questions, which only moments ago had been burning inside me for answers, no longer mattered the moment I looked in your eyes.

All I wanted was for it to be over.

I was proud of myself for staying so calm. I couldn't really hear or process what you were saying; your voice didn't penetrate what seemed like a layer of foam rubber wrapped around my head.

After I pried your fingers from my wrist and walked away, I could still hear you sniffling but, oddly, I didn't feel anything. I still don't. No anger, no pain, no sympathy.

Just nothing.

It's over.

We're over.

There's no going back after this.


	4. Author's Note 073109

Hello lovelies. Happy Friday! So... we have some good news and we have some bad news. The bad news is, no weekly Friday update today. But the good news is that we have posted another one-parter, called **The Club**, so hopefully you'll forgive us. Regular scheduled programming will recommence next Friday.


	5. Tested and Hangover Cure

Hello again, lovelies. Thank you so much for your feedback and support of this series and our other one-parters. It warms our hearts to read your wonderful notes. It's Friday and as long as we have ficlets ready to post we will. ;) So let's see what may have happened after the altercation at Logan's Marina…

***~*Tested*~***

Dawson slowly walked backwards watching his two best friends close ranks against him. _His_ eye hurt. _He _was the one who had been maligned. _He _hadn't even started it and yet Joey was not only tending to Pacey's cut lip, she was spewing outrage at _him_.

Since when did Joey Potter stick up for Pacey Witter against Dawson Leery? He had spent the better part of his childhood mediating _their_ spats. In what unraveling universe did Joey step between him and Pacey and choose Pacey? As he reached the road outside the marina and headed home, he shook his head as if to restore that fragile universe to its rightful order.

She hadn't seen the whole incident, he began to rationalize. She knew what a screw-up Pacey was despite his temporary transformation to A-student, do-gooder, all-around sanctimonious angel last year. Surely Joey thought Pacey was cold-hearted for dumping Andie. Yes, she just didn't have all the facts. They might not be number one on each other's speed dial lately but he could always count on her to take his side. Once she figured out what really happened on that dock she'd be spewing that outrage in the right direction.

Or it could be simple retaliation born of spite due to a certain someone with blonde locks, and a name that rhymes with Steve. She'd said it herself with no small amount of animosity.

He still didn't know what happened to the test. Shit. He bet if he stopped at the Witter's he could check under Pacey's bed with all his Playboys and find it. He knew Pacey wouldn't go home smelling of alcohol. He paused at the corner, debating. His eye throbbed and he reached up to touch it gingerly. He'd better go home and get some ice on it.

The adrenalin that had allowed him enough propulsion to knock down an inebriated Pacey was draining away. He pondered as he walked. Maybe Jack took the test. He wouldn't put it past him. He had stolen his girlfriend. Dawson narrowed his eyes.

It couldn't be Andie, she didn't need it; she already got straight A's and had studied ad nauseum for this test. Same for Joey but if she was nervous about the test she might have taken it as insurance. He briefly wondered if her father's deceit was a genetic trait.

That left Jen. She didn't seem to care about the PSAT one way or another but to a girl of questionable moral character was stealing really out of the question?

Dawson sighed and stewed as he settled into the settee on the porch, a bag of frozen peas held to his eye. As the pain subsided and the swollen tissue began to numb, his thoughts narrowed and focused, each of his _friends'_ names sliding away from his consciousness leaving only one name. The one who started this mess, who made him doubt his lifelong friends, who seemed determined to cause nothing but trouble…

Eve.

* * *

***~*Hangover Cure*~***

Joey released the handle on the gas pump and caught a flash of blue coming down the dock from the street. She looked up to see a familiar law enforcement officer approaching. As she replaced the cap and held out the clipboard for the boat's owner to sign, Doug got close enough to call out, "Hey, Joey, seen Pacey?"

Thinking on her feet, Joey insinuated herself between Doug and the doorway to the office as the motorboat backed out of the slip. "Yep, we're studying for the test tomorrow," she said nodding earnestly.

Doug arched his eyebrows in disbelief. "My little brother? Studying?"

Joey casually leaned against the doorway only partially blocking Doug's view but effectively impeding his forward motion. Pacey snored softly behind her, his head tipped back against the file cabinet. "Let's face it, he needs all the help academically that he can get. We're planning to head back to my house after I close up here."

Doug narrowed his eyes a little and smirked. "Hey, little bro'!" He shouted.

Pacey's head jerked upright in confusion. "Whaaa…what?"

Joey stood her ground between them, her eyes widened imperceptibly. She only wanted to keep Doug far enough away from smelling the alcohol.

Doug laughed and called out over her head, "Easier to read with your eyes open, Pacey. Try it."

Pacey rolled his eyes and ignored Doug's taunt. He tipped his head back and resumed his nap with no effort.

Doug's gaze fell back to Joey. "Good luck with your study partner, Joey. Looks like you would have had better luck with Dawson."

Joey laughed at the irony of _that_ statement as Doug turned sharply on his heel and strolled back the way he had come, waving his goodbye. She wondered if her phone call to the Witter residence had prompted Doug's impromptu visit or if somehow in a fit of spite Dawson had tipped Doug off to Pacey's alcoholically-altered state.

She sighed heavily as she turned to gaze at the sleeping boy. Now what was she going to do? She couldn't leave him here. She needed to lock up the marina. And she definitely had more studying to do. She desperately needed to do well on this test.

Making a decision, she switched off the gas pumps and all but one outside light in her usual closing routine. She hung the clipboard on the hook by the door and then attempted to wake Pacey by calling his name.

Snoring emanated from his slackened jaw.

"Pacey!" she said a little louder this time.

Pacey's head lolled to one side abruptly quieting the noise mid-snore but he didn't open his eyes.

Taking action, she shook his shoulder vigorously and hissed at him. "Pacey!"

"WHAT?" Cerulean eyes set in a web of red opened and glared at her.

"This isn't the Logan Motel. I have to lock up and we have to get out of here. We can't stay here all night."

Pacey shook his head to clear it and started to slide off the desk, stumbling a bit as he did. "Yeah… yeah, okay, Jo."

As he headed for the door, Joey asked, "Where are you going?"

Pacey blinked at her. "Did you or did you not just tell me to get out of here? C'mon, Potter, make up your mind."

"Well, where are you going to go?" She wondered.

Pacey frowned a little. "Don't you fret about that, Josephine. I'll see you tomorrow."

Joey worried her bottom lip, debating. "You can crash at my house if you want."

Pacey grinned a little and waggled his eyebrows. "Really? I had _no _idea you felt that way, Joey."

"Ewww… you cretin." With an exaggerated sigh, she said, "Never mind. Go crawl back in your hole." She pushed him a little so that he was out of the doorway and slinging her backpack over her shoulder, locked the door.

As she started down the dock, Pacey followed. "Prude."

"Pervert," she retorted, her smile hidden by the dark.

The walk home was uneventful but for Pacey's tendency to weave a bit as he walked. Andie, the alcohol and the altercation with Dawson seemed to have taken their toll on him and he was quiet as he trudged beside her. Joey's thoughts were focused on her place in the study guide although she experienced a fleeting thought as to how she was going to explain Pacey's presence to Bessie. For his part, he just concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other and staying awake until they reached her house.

Joey could hear Bessie quietly crooning in Alexander's room as she and Pacey slipped through the door, quietly closing it behind them. Pacey headed straight for the couch and flopped down on his back, his arm folded behind his head as Joey dropped her backpack on the floor near the small kitchen table. When she turned and saw him, his eyes drifting shut, she whispered loudly, "What are you doing?!"

Cocking one eye open, Pacey mumbled, "Potter, you are the Queen of Mixed Signals. No wonder Dawson is looking somewhere more obvious. Did you not say I could crash here?"

"Not on my bed!" she retorted. "Get off before you fall asleep and become dead weight."

"I'll pull out the sofa bed so we can share," he offered, promptly closing his eyes again.

Joey scowled in revulsion. "Never gonna happen. Now get your ass off my bed."

Pacey reluctantly struggled into an upright position and glowered at her. "You've been sleeping with Dawson for years."

"Your point?" She threw him a blanket and pillow she had retrieved from hall closet and pointed to the floor.

"What is going on out here?" Bessie hissed as she appeared from the darkened hall.

Joey shrugged. "Pacey and I are studying for the PSAT."

Bessie glanced between them taking in the extra bedclothes and smirked at Joey.

Joey pleaded with her silently as Pacey slouched against the back of the couch and once again closed his eyes. Shaking her head Bessie relented, "Well, keep it down. If you wake Alexander I promise you won't get any studying done."

Bessie didn't know the meaning of this unexpected overnighter but she knew the dynamic of the three childhood friends had changed since Dawson had returned from Philadelphia. She also knew through the whispers of the small town grapevine that Pacey's home life was sometimes volatile so she had not argued over his unexpected presence here tonight.

Joey let out the breath she'd been unconsciously holding as she watched Bessie debate, decide and then retreat to her room. She saw that Pacey had fallen asleep again and went to rouse him. She poked and shook him until mumbling, he slid off the couch onto the floor, grabbing the pillow as he went and stuffing it under his head.

Joey shook the blanket out over him and considered whether to try to get him to take some aspirin as she looked longingly at her backpack. The evening had turned out to be one interruption after another starting with Pacey's encounter with Mr. Dock. She knew she needed to do well on this test and finally decided she'd done enough in tonight's melodrama. If Pacey had a headache in the morning, maybe it would teach him that life's problems couldn't be solved with a bottle of liquor.

Settling in at the table, she focused on the study guide in front of her.

"Joey?" Pacey cracked one eye open at her from his prone position on the floor, his voice muffled against the pillow.

Joey rolled her eyes, "What now, Pacey?"

"Thanks."

She shook her head with a small smile. "Whatever."

Glancing again at the sleeping boy, she retrieved the aspirin from the kitchen cabinet, filled a glass with water and set it on the coffee table where Pacey could see it when he woke.

Sunlight filtered through the curtains of the Potter living room, falling on Joey's curled form. Panicked she bolted upright. Her gaze searched out the alarm clock and she sighed in relief to see that it wasn't yet 7. She had grabbed the afghan off the back of the couch and stretched out here what seemed like just a few short hours ago. Rubbing her eyes tiredly, she swung her legs to the floor only to entangle them in the empty blanket which had covered Pacey the night before.

She ran her hands through her thick hair and mentally shrugged. She wasn't surprised to find him gone although she hadn't heard him leave. She knew he probably needed to slip into the Witter house while everyone was still sleeping to avoid questions and accusations. She snickered as she noticed the water was gone and the top askew on the aspirin bottle. Well, she couldn't worry about Pacey right now. Her future was in the school library waiting to be decided by her answers on a computerized sheet of red ovals.

She grabbed the blanket off the floor and slowly folded it. She just hoped she was ready.


	6. Stepping Stones

***~* ****Stepping Stones *****~***

**I. Two Steps Forward**

Pacey sauntered through the front doors just before the last bell, ducking as a blue streamer sailed toward his head. Based on the sheer volume, it seemed as if a mutant birthday party or ticker tape parade had vomited in the corridors of Capeside High. He cringed slightly and began to calculate the easiest and most inconspicuous way to limit his exposure to today's festivities.

After all, he had an important package to pick up.

He had a little more purpose in his life these days but - not surprisingly - it had nothing to do with these hallowed halls. Finally, that knot of disappointment and pain in his guts over his break up with Andie was beginning to loosen its tight grip. The dread, the one that had flooded back into his consciousness moments after waking each day, had become instead a little gurgle of excitement.

What wonders the love for a new lady wrought!

And what a beauty she was! In his mind's eye he envisioned her, sleek and strong, her decks as smooth as glass. Sure, she was a little rough around the edges right now maybe, but nothing that couldn't be fixed given some time and effort.

He had been surprised, astounded even, when Doug had asked him if he was interested. Very un-Dougie-like. He was pretty sure if he had approached Doug instead of the other way around, his interest would have been met with skepticism and derision. But not only had Doug introduced him to the boat's savior but he had discreetly inquired as to whether he needed help with the financing. Wary at first, Pacey wondered what the catch was but the moment he had seen that beauty, he was sold.

Doug's friend had given him free rein to work on her where she stood in exchange for helping around the yard where she resided. And that's exactly what he did, going there directly after school every day that he didn't have a shift at Screenplay.

He smiled to himself remembering the first day he'd approached her, his heart lighter than it had been for a while. He'd paused far enough away so he could see every bit of her and considered.

She needed a name. Something honest, inspirational, and worthy of her beauty.

Something that, although it currently seemed to be out of his reach, he believed in and his heart ached for.

It took only a few minutes of studying her from afar before he'd settled on the perfect, albeit a little schmaltzy, name and had set about making arrangements for a hand-painted name plaque.

The important package? Well, it had finally come and he couldn't wait to get his hands on it. Today was the day he was picking up that very plaque from the post office.

So far, he hadn't told anyone about his after-school project. Although he and Dawson had declared a "guy truce," Pacey figured if he shared this news with him he would probably only get a vacant nod and, if he was lucky, an insincere, "Really?"

Also, if he was honest with himself, he was still stinging a little from Dawson's accusations; especially since it wasn't the first time he had revealed what seemed to be his true feelings toward Pacey's character. No, he'd revel in the thrill of this new venture quietly right now.

He slid into his usual seat in homeroom just as his name was called. "Here," he murmured, raising his hand briefly.

No sense in getting marked absent. Cardinal rule of skipping school? Show up for homeroom and let the record show you in attendance. After that… well, by the time they figured out you'd missed a class or two the school day was over. After all, you could be anywhere - guidance counselor, nurse, with the coach - legitimately. Right?

The bell rang signaling the end of homeroom. Three minutes to make his escape under the cover of the crowd before first period started. Heading out of the classroom, Pacey caught sight of a sheaf of brown hair swinging with purpose toward her first class.

Suddenly inspired to share the secret of his new love with someone who just might understand what it was to have a dream, he grabbed the life-sized cutout of Mr. Minuteman and in a few strides snuck up behind Joey Potter.

If he pushed the right buttons, hopefully it wouldn't take a lot persuasion to get her to be his partner in crime for the day and cut class. Sharing secrets aside, he could use a hand getting those decks as smooth as glass and Potter had never been one to shy away from a little hard work.

***~***

**II. One Step Back**

Joey leaned forward watching her childhood flicker across the screen. Her small smile faded to something more pensive – something edged in a shimmer of pain, the ache bittersweet - at her mother in motion.

She remembered that time so clearly.

Sunny summer days, Gale and her mom with a tray of ice tea, chatting and laughing, while they kept a watchful eye on them. A sudden longing spiked through her causing her throat to constrict and her breath to catch in her chest.

Just what were Dawson's motives? Was the tape a straight-forward gift? An overture toward reconciliation? A nostalgic reminder of relationships lost? Or, as he said, was it a thank you for advice asked and answered?

Eyes still tracking the images on the TV, she sighed. Working on that post-iceberg Titanic of Pacey's had been therapeutic. Even annoying as Pacey was, his company was familiar. She'd been able to tune everything out and let her hands take over in the rhythmic movements as they caressed and molded the weathered wood, giving it a new lease on life. For once, she didn't have to ponder or wonder or worry.

There was nothing to figure out and analyze.

For that short period of time, she could focus on the task before her and she didn't have to feel anything bar the transformation of the planks beneath her hands.

Wistfully, she imagined a magic sanding block that would transform her life, particularly her love life. One that would smooth things out between her and Dawson and somehow mend the brokenness between them.

He had said that he and Eve were no longer speaking. He had asked for her advice. He had given her a gift. Did it mean anything? Did she want it to? Her teeth scraped her bottom lip, chewing a little as she considered.

"_Bye, Joey."_

"_Bye, Dawson."_

The small voice of her former self echoed and resonated in the present.

The tape came to its end, leaving the screen black.

Was it the black of nothingness or a clean slate of unlimited possibilities?


	7. Plans

Hello everyone! Happy Friday! This week's ficlet takes a look at a missing scene from the **Indian Summer** episode... as always, we hope you enjoy and please let us know what you think.

*~* **Plans** *~*

Under the cries of wheeling gulls, Joey approached the battered boat. Despite the noise above, she could hear a slightly off-key rendition of _Baby, I'm Gonna Leave You_ floating from somewhere in the general vicinity of the bow. She didn't see him but knew she would find him as she often did lately, earbuds delivering classic rock at an unfathomable volume, sanding block or hammer in hand. And despite her rage and subsequent anxiety over her final face-off with that low-life Logan, she couldn't help but smile.

Rounding the hull, she stopped in her tracks, surprised to find her breath catching a little at the sight of him. He was naked from the waist up, the slight sheen of sweat visible along his back, with his t-shirt hooked inside the back of his jeans. Indian summer still lingered and the late afternoon retained the heat of the day. All this manual labor was definitely giving her slacker friend definition that he'd never had.

She raised her voice to get his attention, "Hey!" She waved her hand in his peripheral vision.

He looked up and pulled the earbuds out of his ears and tipped his chin at her, "Potter."

"Don."

He wrinkled his brow with a smirk and said slowly, "Paaaaaa-ceeeeeey."

She rolled her eyes and simply stated, "Quixote."

"Ahhh… Trying to say this is the impossible dream?"

"Actually, no. Just looking for a little inspiration from the only one of the Three Musketeers who is currently putting feet to their dreams."

"That's me, Potter. All action."

"No thinking."

"Hey!!! You came here. If you're gonna abuse me, the least you can do is help." He threw her a sanding block.

"Are we still on _this?_"She caught the pitch deftly and following the nod of his head began working on a section of the hull closer to the stern.

"The sanding fairies haven't been working while you've been slacking, Potter."

Joey huffed and rolled her eyes more from habit than any real irritation. Now that she was here she wondered exactly what she had hoped to accomplish by wandering this way – besides conscription into the Witter work detail.

They worked side by side in comfortable silence until Pacey heard her sigh for the fifth time. "What's on your mind, Jo?" Because God knows, _she _did plenty of thinking.

"Bessie got the insurance check for the Ice House," she confided.

"Yeah? That's great." He glanced over at her slowly moving the sanding block back and forth in the same place, her eyes unfocussed on the task. "Right?" He queried. "That's what you've been waiting for, isn't it?"

She seemed to snap out of it a bit. "Yeah. Sure. Right." She nodded and then stopped sanding altogether. She suddenly turned to him and said accusingly, "Do you know what the start-up costs of a restaurant are?" Her voice raised half an octave and her hands began to flutter as she gained momentum. "Even used equipment is expensive! We'd have to find and hire a whole new staff. Bodie's committed to that place in New Bedford until after the holidays so he won't even be here. And the competition down on the waterfront is fierce. And I _am_ going to have to go to school and study _sometime…,_" she trailed off, still staring at him with narrowed eyes as if he had been the one to set the match to the Ice House in the first place.

Pacey stared at her with wide blue eyes, trying to determine exactly what was at the foundation of that rant. "Ummm… yeah… that sounds like it might be a bit much for sisters Potter to take on but what else did you have in mind?"

She threw her hands up in the air. "I don't know! What else is there in this tourist trap? And another thing! With Alexander, it's not easy for Bessie to go anywhere, even with live-in slave labor."

"Well, Jo, Capeside, _is_ a tourist town. That's the biggest industry here besides fishing. So unless Bessie's gonna throw Alex on a trawler every day and compete for a haul with the big boys, you gotta think of something she can do out of the homestead. Can she bake?" he wondered.

The Ice House hadn't served dessert and since Mrs. Potter had died Pacey couldn't remember actually getting anything but Animal Crackers at the Potter residence. Up until Gale moved to Philadelphia, Leery's had been his best bet. Now he was dependent on Mrs. Ryan for anything homemade.

He continued, "You could bake and deliver to area restaurants." Warming up to the idea, he said, "Packaged right, you could have some of those shops downtown take stuff on consignment."

Joey chewed her bottom lip, a faint crease between her brows. She looked at him skeptically. "You think that would bring in enough to support us?"

Pacey shrugged. "I don't know, Jo. What's the going rate for home-baked cookies?" He paused and added comically, "In my world – priceless."

His words had the intended effect and Joey laughed. "Unfortunately, not everyone depends on your mom to get their quota of baked goods. Otherwise, we could make a killing." Joey and Dawson had only been invited inside at Pacey's house to play as kids a few times. They learned to politely decline anything proffered from Mary Witter's cookie jar as the contents were better suited to playing hockey than eating.

Both resumed their jobs smoothing the wood of the True Love, their silence still comfortable but now filled with the almost audible churning of gears in their heads. Finally Joey looked at Pacey out of the corner of her eye and said quietly, "You think we could fix the house up enough to turn it into a bed and breakfast?" There she had said it out loud. The words she had in her mind since she saw her mother in that home movie. The words that had just gotten louder and louder since Rob Logan fired her.

Pacey's hand stopped and he cocked his head to one side. "Hey, that's not a bad idea. Take a lot of work on the house," he said slowly. He raised one eyebrow at her. "Unless you're just planning to rent out the couch!"

"Pacey!" She admonished. "Yeah, we'd definitely need a few more bedrooms. Hey," she said brightly, "maybe I could finally get one of my own."

Pacey took a pencil stub out of his back pocket and roughly sketched the floor plan of the Potter residence on a discarded piece of plywood. "Look, Jo, if you knock out this wall on the far side and the one that faces the street, you could add some bedrooms, expand the kitchen and add a dining area. Spiff up the living room and wala! You got yourself a bed and breakfast!"

"Voila," she corrected him but grinned all the same; his enthusiasm was contagious. "You really think it could work? How much do you think that would cost?"

He tucked the pencil behind one ear. "Not sure. It depends on the cost of materials and labor but if you could get some people to pitch in the labor…," he paused thoughtfully. "I have an idea."

"What?" Joey's eyes were shining as she allowed a little flicker of hope to ignite inside her for the first time since that night Pacey had carried her out of the Ice House while it burned behind her.

He shook his head. "Let me check something out first," he answered.

She set the sanding block on the makeshift workbench Pacey had set up and reached around to pull out his t-shirt to throw it at him. Ignoring his dumbfounded look, she grabbed his arm by the wrist. "Come on!"

"Whoa there, Missy!" He struggled to put on his shirt with only one free arm. "Where are we going?" He dug in his heels and though Joey was strong, she couldn't budge him.

"To talk to Bessie," she pleaded over her shoulder as she continued to try to drag him in the direction of the road. "C'mon, Pacey, I'm gonna need backup."

He grabbed the wrist of the hand holding his arm and pulled her back to him. When she turned to face him fully, he said, "Hey, wait up. Don't you think it would be better if we had a plan to present before _you_ talk to Bessie - one with some concrete information and maybe even some numbers to show her? How open is she gonna to be to this whole idea anyway?"

Joey seemed to deflate a little. "I don't know. To be honest, I think she'll be glad to have any idea that isn't another restaurant. But maybe you're right…"

"I'm sorry, what was that?" He cupped one ear. "Did you just say _I_ was right?" He grinned.

Joey rolled her eyes and continued, "To be clear, I said, 'Maybe.' But I do think _we_ should get some information together before _we_ go talk to her. You will go with me, right? How long will it take us to figure this out?"

Pacey looked at the girl standing in front of him waiting for answers and wondered if this was part of the deal he had inherited from Dawson, and for how long exactly that deal was.

He rubbed his hand across the back of his neck and then smiled reassuringly. "Day or two. I'll make a couple of phone calls. In the meantime, you should…," he paused and grinned slyly, "…get back to work on my girl here." He tossed her the sanding block again. "Because we don't have a plan yet. And you gotta have a plan, Potter."


	8. Sedulous

Hello everyone! Thank you so much for your feedback and support for the ficlet series so far. We are really enjoying revisiting S3 and it warms our hearts to know you are too. We're back this time with a smorgasbord of scenes from the **Secrets and Lies** episode. Hope you enjoy…

*~* **Sedulous** *~*

Guiding her shopping cart steadily through the aisle, she came to a stop in front of the cereal and picked up a box of bran flakes. Her study of the back of the box was interrupted when she heard voices drifting across from the aisle behind her.

"_And how much longer do you think it will take to finish?_"

"_We're not sure. Probably a couple of months or so? Maybe sooner thanks to Pacey. I told you he's the one that got some of the police auxiliary to help out, right?_"__

"_He's such a sweet boy._"

A female laugh. "_Yeah, when he wants to be. We're seeing a lot of him lately that's for sure. He and Joey are attached at the hip._" Another laugh. "_He stays so late most nights I have to feed him,_ _which gives me all the practice I need serving meals for our future B&B guests._"

Hearing their conversation come to an end as they said their goodbyes, she abruptly put the cereal box back on the shelf and turned to push her cart. She had only taken two steps when one of the speakers from the eavesdropped conversation rounded the corner and headed in her direction.

"Hi," Bessie smiled brightly as she passed her and continued down the aisle.

"Oh, um, hi, Bessie!" Andie adopted her usual perky voice, smiling back as she watched Bessie walk by and disappear out of sight. Only then did she drop her smile, her face turning contemplative as her mind rapidly absorbed what she'd overheard.

Looks like if one wanted to reach Pacey, indirectly or not, their best bet was to find him at the Potter residence these days.

Interesting.

*~*

Joey randomly considered that she and Pacey were once again in his truck together as a result of Andie. Since when had she become a member of the Witter White Knight Society? She shook off the thought. Andie was in trouble at Rob Logan's house and had called _her. _It wasn't as though Andie knew Pacey would be at her house and insist on coming with her. That was just a coincidence. She needed to go and help. She, of all people, knew what a slimeball Rob was and knew what he was capable of.

She stole another glance at Pacey, whose face bore a crevice between his brows, whether of worry or anger, she wasn't sure.

"Pace, we're almost there," she reassured. "It's gonna be okay."

Pacey's glare flicked away from the road to pin her in place. "Potter, why the hell didn't you tell me about this guy before?"

"Excuse me?" Joey looked at him in shock.

"Was I unclear? Why. Didn't. You. Tell. Me?" Disdain punctuated his question.

"Why would I?" She snapped at him.

"Didn't this guy harass you at work, Joey?"

"Pacey, Rob was really no different than any other asshole that couldn't keep their comments or hands to themselves since I was old enough to be a serving wench at the Ice House. Why would I tell you about him?"

"Because Andie's going out with _this_ one."

"And you are no longer Andie's boyfriend!" She winced at the flicker of pain that shadowed his eyes. Ticking her fingers as bullet points, she reasoned, "Look, I _tried_ to warn her. I interrupted their date at the Rialto. I got _fired_ because I tried to interfere."

"But you didn't tell me." Jaw set, brow furrowed, Pacey sang the same refrain.

She narrowed her eyes at him thinking what a stubborn ass he'd always been and shouted, "Because I knew you'd be hurt!"

Pulling to a stop at a stop sign, Pacey closed his eyes briefly as his shoulders dropped and she could see him deflate. "I don't need you to protect me, Potter," he muttered and proceeded through the stop sign.

She turned away from him then and watched the dark streets dotted with warmly lit houses slide by her window. "Don't worry. It'll never happen again," she promised.

Cars lined the street ahead, lights spilling out of an overcrowded house. Pacey slowed down to turn in the driveway and glanced at the girl beside him. It wasn't her fault that Andie was here with Rob Logan but he didn't have the time or energy to make it right between them at the moment. Joey could wait. Their relationship had survived a lifetime of battles and Andie needed him right now.

*~*

As Pacey watched her walk lightheartedly toward her front door, he was not surprised to realize that knot of dread in his gut had returned. His eyes drifted shut as if to block out the sight of last night's memories. _'What was I thinking?'_ played on a continuous loop in his mind as if, examined often enough, an answer to the question would present itself.

Attempting to reassure Andie that he was okay by taking her to see the True Love had not been the most carefully considered course of action. In her fragile state, she seemed to have misunderstood and kissing her – or allowing her to kiss him - had just reinforced that misunderstanding.

As much as he had appreciated being able to hold her once more, it just didn't feel the same as it had before…

He shook his head to clear it and turned the SUV toward home.

*~*

Seething, Joey paced away from the door she had just closed against Rob Logan and chewed the inside of her bottom lip. Hands on hips, she paced back towards the door, his words reverberating in her thoughts.

_I have never forced myself on anyone. _

_Then why would she do this, huh? That's all I wanna know. For what possible reason?_

Despite her hostility toward him, she began to catalog Andie's behavior the night before.

Andie refused to make a police report.

She refused Joey's offer of refuge.

But she didn't refuse Pacey's help.

Stacked against the evidence of Joey's own experience with Rob, his denial seemed inadequate but she was surprised that Andie was so willing to sweep the whole incident under the rug. Could Andie think that she deserved this? That Rob attacking her was some screwed up karma for cheating on Pacey? No, that couldn't be it. At least, Joey hoped it wasn't. No one deserved that to happen to them.

Perhaps it was simply the stigma of word getting around the country club set that caused her to balk at reporting him to the authorities. Joey was certain the elite of the east coast didn't operate under the same dictates as the rest of the plebeian population.

Still, something didn't feel right. Maybe she should stop at Andie's to see if she _had_ reported Rob, or at least told her dad or Jack what happened.

Moments later, she was headed down the steps of the porch, calling back over her shoulder, "I'll be back later, Bessie!" as the screen door slammed shut.

*~*

Pulling his patrol car to a stop, Doug lifted the handbrake and rested his elbow on the edge of the open car window. As he watched his little brother hard at work on his boat on the other side of the yard, Doug's smile was soft, bordering on proud.

He was glad he'd introduced Pacey to his friend and that Pacey had snapped up the idea to buy the dilapidated boat. Although it seemed that Doug didn't know the first thing about Pacey – and, okay, most of the time he didn't - he did know that right now Pacey was hurting.

For whatever reason he hadn't seen him and Dawson hanging around each other as much as they usually did. His instincts had kicked in and he knew it was time for him to step up to the role of big brother once and for all. Problem was he didn't quite know how to go about doing that. After all, he hadn't had a lot of practice over the years and he was pretty sure that any direct attempts he made wouldn't be welcomed with open arms.

The gap between their ages wasn't the only reason they had never gotten along but once he'd joined the force, he noticed a marked difference in the way Pacey behaved toward him and they became even more distant. It was as though the uniform triggered something in Pacey. And he had an inkling it was somehow related to their father, whereby Pacey had come to associate the uniform with pain, whether physical, psychological or emotional. Theirs was a family which didn't talk about the things that happened behind their closed doors. Some things were taboo. Growing up, their father was the man of the house and however he deemed it best to discipline his kids, especially his youngest son, was not something that was open to discussion. You simply accepted it and turned a blind eye.

Now that Doug was older and living in his own place, he was able to see things in a new light but that didn't mean he had the power to change them.

He sighed as he studied Pacey shaping what looked like a rudder with a circular saw. All Doug could do was work on the little things. Like continue his drive-bys of the Witter house late at night to check that things were okay, keeping an eye on Pacey, always watching from a distance much like he was right now.

As they weren't at the stage yet where Pacey could come to him to talk about whatever it was that was troubling him, Doug was content that Pacey was able to use the project of rebuilding this boat as something constructive to focus on and direct his boundless energy.

He smiled once more. It didn't matter that Pacey didn't know the efforts Doug had gone to find the boat in the first place before suggesting the idea to Pacey or that he'd called in a favor with his friend and convinced him to offer the boat to Pacey at half price. None of that was important. Seeing that spark of light back in his brother's eyes, however small, was worth it and all the thanks he needed.

With one last look, Doug released the brake and turned the car back in the direction of the main road.

*~*

Joey had declined Andie's dinner invitation, an undercurrent of _something_ still between them. Unspoken questions, quick defenses. As she slowly walked home, she wondered most at Andie's sense of settled satisfaction. Something that shouted, "Mission accomplished."

She tried to shrug off her doubts. If Pacey and Andie were back together, good for them. Maybe Pacey had taken her forgiveness speech to heart after all. Maybe enough time had passed for the sting of Andie's indiscretion to have faded to an unpleasant memory. His reaction to the news about Rob and Andie dating seemed to indicate otherwise but who was she to judge the human heart? She and Dawson had certainly participated in the revolving door of "on again, off again" enough.

Hey, maybe now he could enlist Andie to help with that heap of timber he was determined to restore and she'd be off the hook for unpaid work detail at the boatyard.

And yet, the uneasy feeling that had driven her to the McPhee residence in the first place persisted. Because despite what Andie said, Joey knew that everything usually doesn't just magically go back to the way it was, no matter how much you may want it to.

*~*

Pacey caught sight of the slim figure approaching in the dim light from his perch on the deck of the True Love. She looked around the yard, tugging her sweater down over her hands before finally tentatively calling out his name.

She didn't know exactly what had drawn her here. What she did know was that Andie was hurting; she imagined that he was, too. She felt as if somehow she were ultimately to blame for this whole mess. And she just wanted to see if he was okay.

She hadn't seen him yet and he wondered if he sat absolutely still, if she would give up and leave. But then she spotted him in the shadows, elbows propped on his knees, head down.

She came closer. "Pacey?" This time there was a question in her voice.

"Go home, Potter."

Her footsteps faltered and she gazed up at him from beneath the sweep of her long lashes, her eyes luminous in the reflected lights lining the waterfront.

"Go home," he repeated more gently, adding with a whisper, "please."

Bobbing her head, she turned and slowly retreated, giving him the gift of privacy in which to grieve – again.


	9. Author's Note 090709

The ficlet series is on hiatus while we offer **Somewhere Over** for your reading enjoyment. We thank you so much for your continued support of this series and encourage you to check back on 9/18/09 for the next installment.


	10. Hunger Pangs

**A/N**: We're back! Did you miss us? ;) Here are two missing scenes set after the **Escape From Witch Island** epi. As always, please let us know what you think. Thank you.

************Hunger Pangs************

**I.******

Bessie had once again held out the promise of dinner in trade for a tidy construction site after the volunteers had gone for the day. Pacey, never one to pass on a hot meal that didn't come from Mary Witter's kitchen, stayed.

He would have stayed anyway.

They had a nice little routine going now, although he didn't quite know when that happened. Many days he and Joey would head to the boatyard to work on the True Love and stay out of the way of the construction crew before making their way to the Potter house to help.

With all the time they were spending together recently, he was surprised to rediscover that he didn't mind Potter's company all that much. She was almost fun to be around.

When she wasn't talking, of course.

Joey handed him the dustpan and he knelt down, holding it steady for her without comment while she swept up the errant wood shavings from the floor. Until he realized she was humming. "Been hittin' those happy pills, Potter?"

"Hmmmm?" She looked up as if she just noticed him.

"You're sounding positively cheerful. I'm fairly sure that's a sign of the impending Apocalypse." He chuckled. "Care to share?"

"Why wouldn't I be cheerful, Pacey? The B&B is coming along nicely. We all got great grades on our history project, which saved me from a long and tragic downward spiral that would have doomed me to wait the tables of Capeside's greasy spoons for eternity. And," she slyly lifted the corner of her lips, "you're kneeling at my feet… as you should. All is right with the world."

Pacey immediately stood up with a disgusted look. "As if. You can take me _off_ your list." He changed tactics, unable to resist the tease. "It wouldn't have anything to do with Kevin and Winnie making their way back to the Wonder Years, would it?"

Right on cue, Joey rolled her eyes.

Pacey persisted, loving the thrill of winding her up. It was just so easy. "Has the Leery ladder been getting a work out lately?" He waggled his eyebrows at her. "Hmmmm? C'mon, Joey, you can tell me. What's the scoop on the reconciliation between Capeside's very own star-crossed soul mates? Inquiring minds want to know," he urged with a wink in both his eye and voice.

She narrowed her eyes at him and smirked. "Dawson and I are _friends_, Pacey. Just as we always have been."

Moving his hands as he spoke, still holding the dustpan, it was Pacey's turn to smirk. "Uh-huh. Riiiight. And the spring in your step has nothing to do with-"

Joey cut him off mid-sentence, her voice firm, "You're dropping the sawdust back on the floor, dimwad. You know, if you'd work more and talk less, we'd be having dinner by now." She snatched the dustpan from him and dumped the contents in the trash as she headed out the room.

Frowning, he stared at her back for a moment while she disappeared toward the kitchen. Recalling the reassurance he had given Dawson in Witch Island's church, he felt a twinge in his gut of something indefinable.

But for the life of him he couldn't figure out its cause.

Shaking it off, he trailed after Joey, his stomach growling with the thought of a home-cooked meal. No matter what, those two were destined to be, right? Because the smartass sidekick never gets the girl. Once again he felt that twinge, but this time passed it off as simply hunger pains.

Because it wasn't like he _cared_ if the Wonder Years reunion came to Capeside. With Jen's offer on the table, he was all set.

Everything he and Jen had agreed upon was true. Sex good, love bad. This friends with benefit deal had been his idea, after all. His track record with love was dismal. He wasn't looking for another relationship with a blonde.

This was just what he needed.

Wasn't it?

**********

**II.  
**  
Ensconced in her room, after having successfully kept her interaction with Grams to a minimum, Jen flipped through her choices for music. She picked up one of her favorite CDs and casually studied the back cover only to set it down again. Angry chick rock just didn't seem that appropriate tonight - not after the intriguing and promising agreement she and Pacey shook hands on.

Opting for a mellower tune she popped the disc into her player and lay back on the bed, getting comfortable against the pillows. Headphones settled atop her blonde locks, she cranked up the volume and closed her eyes.****

Her small tongue peeked out as she wet her lips, deep in thought. Yep, she was certainly looking forward to a ride on The Pacey Train. Andie had never been particularly forthcoming with details – and, of course, she and Ms. Jacobs had never been confidantes - but she could tell, oh yes, she could tell that Pacey _really_ loved women.

A woman instinctively knows these things.

Remembering the discussion she'd had with Dawson on comparing sex to eating an ice cream sundae without a spoon, she had no doubt that Pacey was the type of guy who took his time savoring his dessert. She idly twisted the cord of the headphones in her hands as she visualized the scene.

He'd need no guidance. He'd pace it just right, possibly using teasing licks at first then alternate them with long swipes, massaging the ice cream with his tongue over and over. He might even use his lips to mold the ice cream to soft peaks, then smooth them down again with a caress from the flat of his tongue. He'd seduce the sundae such that the ice cream heated from his actions and the warmth of his mouth to the point it almost overflowed its dish and ran down the sides. Only then would he delicately nibble, taking small bites with his teeth, before using that wicked tongue once more. _Umm humm_. She could already see the whipped cream all over their smiling faces.

Damn, now she was hungry for ice cream. She rubbed her stomach in an attempt to push the craving aside and refocused her thoughts inwards.

To use his own words, Pacey certainly was comely and more. He could probably even do that trick with his tongue and the cherry, the one where you tie a knot in the stem. Oh yeah… she had no doubt he had many talents. He would definitely fully appreciate a women's body and see to her needs before his own. Needs which hadn't been seen to in a very long time.

Plus, looks-wise he was just the type she went for. Tall, sexy eyes and he had those long fingers like Billy's… _Billy_?! Her eyes flung open. Where the hell did that come from?

Jen shook her head as if to clear it and snuggled further into her pillows propped against the head of the bed. She stared, unseeing, out the window. She'd had lots of boys. Some old enough to be considered men, even.

But this was a different life in an entirely different place. A different life… but sex was still just sex, wasn't it?

Pacey had agreed with her, after all. Sex good, love bad. Look at what had happened with Dawson. Her forehead creased when her eyes came to focus on the white clapboard house across the lawn. All those pesky, sappy emotions simply got in the way; they had caused her to make a fool of herself. Much the same way Henry Parker seemed to be doing right now with her – without the history of a relationship, of course. No, she had no desire to travel down that road again anytime soon.

Pacey was right - the two of them were on a level playing field. No muss, no fuss, no strings attached. The perfect arrangement.

She closed her eyes again and recalled his kisses from their all-too-brief encounter on Witch Island. One thing she could say for certain, those soft lips had _matured_ since the time they had last met in Saturday Detention. That had been pleasant, their audience notwithstanding, but his technique without a doubt reflected his experience now.

Still, when they kissed there were no… tingles. Could sex – sober sex, that is - _be_ any good without tingles? Sure, they would have fun and probably laugh a lot, and that was a good thing… but there was always the danger that they would laugh _too_ much. From her experience, opposites attract even in the most casual of sexual encounters – and Pacey and she were very much two peas from the same pod.

Would their arrangement, which sounded so good in theory, work in reality?

Jen frowned as the doubts lingered.

She was just tired. That was all. And hungry.

With the thought of food, her musings took a different course. She wondered what Jack would have to say about her arrangement with their mutual friend. Should she tell him? Would he squee or would he be scandalized?

Jack. Her friend first and last. No hidden agenda. No ulterior motive. Simply the person who knew her best. Lulled by the beat of the music in her ears, her eyes drifted closed and a soft smile lifted her lips as warmth spread through her at the thought of her best friend - the one man she could always count on.


	11. Potter Talk

**A/N**: Happy Friday everyone! Here's a little something featuring the Potter sisters from the **Guess Who's Coming To Dinner** epi. It's set after the Thanksgiving dinner. Hope you enjoy…

************Potter Talk************

Bessie looked up from her nest of comfy throws in the corner of the couch as Joey quietly eased the door shut behind her. "Hey, Jo, have a good time?"

Joey nodded as she divested herself of her coat and slipped off her heels. "Yeah," she said, quickly settling on the other end of the couch and tucking her feet under one of the throws. "It was really nice to see everyone together. It's been a while since that's happened."

Bessie muted the television before spreading the fleece over Joey's legs, gently rubbing them to ease the chill from outside. "So tell me. Did Jen know her mother was coming?"

Joey shook her head. "Nope, not a clue! I have a feeling if Mrs. Ryan had told her ahead of time, Jen would have made it a point to spend the day elsewhere. From what Jen's told me, she only heard from her mom once or twice since she's been in Capeside." She tucked her hair behind her ears. "Did you know her when she lived here?"

It was Bessie's turn to shake her head. "She's a lot older than me, I think. Maybe fifteen years? I knew _of _her. She didn't graduate from Capeside High; she went to some private school her last two years."

"Do you know why?" Being the target of gossip in all its ugliness did not always prevent Joey from partaking, especially in the privacy of her own home.

"Nuh-uh." Bessie's eyes lit up when she saw her sister's face. "Wait, do you?"

Joey bobbed her head. "She got pregnant!"

Bessie frowned. "So?" Her short and pointed question jolted Joey's awareness of just what the accusation must have sounded like.

"_That's_ not the big deal, Bess. The big deal is exactly _who_ that baby grew up to be!"

When Joey didn't offer any more information, Bessie playfully nudged Joey's leg. "Well?? Tell me!"

"Eve." The revelation was shocking enough to stand on its own and Joey let it sink into Bessie's consciousness.

Taking just a second or two to make the connection, Bessie's mouth hung open. "'Sex with Dawson on the stage at the Pep Rally' Eve?" she named her.

"Ding, ding, ding! Can you believe it? Jen's sister, well… half-sister." Joey shook her head in wonder. "Looks like Dawson, even if he didn't know it at the time, was on track to hook up with all the girls in the Ryan family. Mrs. Ryan better watch out!" She laughed teasingly.

Bessie snickered and scolded, "Joey!" Her visage then became serious as she asked, "How did Jen take it? And how did you find out?!"

"Dawson told me at movie night last week but of course, swore me to secrecy. Now that Jen knows, the cat's out the bag so to speak - no more need for secrecy." She shifted on the couch getting further under the fleece. "She seemed…. okay, by the end of the evening at least. But she was all over the place the rest of the day. Angry, mostly, which you'd expect. I mean, the way she found out was pretty awful." Her eyes grew wide in empathy. "All these years she didn't know she had a sister. And then her mom up and left."

"Really?" Bessie clicked her tongue in disbelief. "You mean she drove back to New York _tonight_?"

"Yep, right after you left. Dawson and I were sitting at the table talking when we saw her leave. Jen and Mrs. Ryan were there to say goodbye. From their body language they all seemed to be on better terms, but we couldn't hear them."

She dragged out a heavy breath and let her eyes drift around the room. No lights were on, the darkened room only lit by the glow from the television, distorting the objects. After the conversation she'd had earlier in the day with her sister, thoughts of their mom had lingered, never far from her mind. It was only natural after today's events and seeing Jen interact with her mom that she compare the relationship she'd had with her own. She was so grateful for the time she'd had with her, and for the person she'd been. So open, so loving.

Her eyes automatically sought Bessie's and she gave her sister a small, private smile knowing she felt the same way. "All in all it was a day of revelations." She suddenly remembered something. "Hey," she exclaimed, "did you know Gale and Mitch's divorce is final?"

Bessie frowned, her eyes narrowing as she considered. "Gale didn't mention anything to me. I'm sure she didn't think it was the right time or place. Why, did she tell you?"

Joey rolled her eyes a bit. "Of course not," she said dryly. "Gale and I may have bonded over the course of my long, long relationship with Dawson but I'm not exactly high on her "go to" list for confidences, especially after the debacle with Bob. No, Dawson told me himself. He just found out today!" She paused for effect. "After dinner."

"When they were at the Ryan's?" Bessie sounded surprised. She was quiet for a moment as she took the news in. "It's just so sad. I kept hoping they'd reconcile." She pursed her lips. "Is Dawson okay?"

"He says he's relieved that they did _something_ definitive. But… I don't know. I still think that kind of trauma in his all too-perfect world will either give him material for his next movie or reinforce his propensity to rewrite history, ya know? Knowing him, there's a very real possibility that one day next year he'll wake up and say, 'My parents are divorced? Noooo, my parents aren't divorced. That's not in the script!'"

Bessie laughed conspiratorially, neither confirming nor - more importantly - denying Joey's insight. "Speaking of breakups, I was surprised to see Andie and Pacey in the same place at the same time today. Didn't the Witter's have dinner planned at their house?"

Joey smirked. "Bess, please. Pacey eats dinner _here_ almost every night. Why would the fact that it's a holiday improve Mrs. Witter's cooking? Not to mention, I think Carrie and her kids were visiting, which makes for a whole houseful of crazy. Besides, Andie and Jack were supposed to be having dinner with their father and he got stuck in Chicago. I don't think Pacey even knew she was going to be there."

"Well, at least they behaved civilly," Bessie remarked.

"Yeah, I suppose." Hearing the tone of Joey's voice, Bessie gave her a look, which in Potter Talk meant "spill". Joey sighed with a shrug. "It's just… they're both hurting. I don't know how to help, or even if I should. Andie is so devastated. I tried to tell her it would get better but I know she won't believe me until it happens. Which I get. I'd feel the same if I were in her shoes." She took a breath before continuing, "Pacey, well, I don't know. It's hard to tell with him because he simply won't say anything when it comes to Andie. He keeps those emotions so close to his heart. He either has that brooding thing going on or he makes a joke out of everything."

Joey didn't share the conversation she'd had with Pacey as the Thanksgiving party was breaking up.

_  
The campfire had died down and the damp night chill rolling off the creek impelled the friends to say their goodbyes and head their separate ways. She noticed Pacey had yet to move; he was still sitting in the same spot on the log as he watched Andie as she and Jack headed for the Saab. She knew that Pacey had seen Andie and her talking on the Ryan's front porch before dinner, just as she knew he wouldn't question her about what was said or if Andie was okay._

But that didn't mean he didn't want to know.

Hands deep in her coat pockets, she slowly walked over till she stood by his side and cleared her throat. "Hey." She kept her eyes in the same direction as his watching Andie and Jack get in their car.

He didn't answer her until she looked at his face. "What's up, Jo?" he said, slowly changing his focus.

Joey tipped her chin toward the car now slowly backing toward the street. "She misses you, you know." Then softly added. "And she's sorry."

He nodded amicably and shrugged, his eyes sliding away again, this time to study the last of the embers in the fire. "Yeah, I know." His voice was quiet but confident, no traces of remorse or bitterness - just calm acceptance and belief. "She'll find the right one."

Wanting him to say more, but knowing he wouldn't, she tried anyway. "What about you, Pace? You okay?"

He flicked his eyes back to her face. It was so quick she almost didn't catch it, but it was there. An ever-so brief look of doubt. Then it was gone. He stood up so they were face-to-face and morphed his mouth into his trademark grin, opting for a care-free quality to his voice. "Don't you worry about me, Potter." He mocked her concern with a playful tap on the head. "It's a world of endless possibilities, right? Anything can happen."

It seemed she wasn't likely to get a straight answer out of him tonight. So she reverted to their fail-safe banter. "I've told you before, Pacey, they'll never give porn away for free."

He raised his index finger and shook it in the air. "Never say never, Jo." Then quickly added, "Although it's nice to know where your mind is at and thinking of my sex life." He smiled impishly at her heated glare. "I'll have to return the favor one day." She knew there was no need to vocalize the "bite me" burning in her eyes. "Night, Jo," he chuckled.

She rolled her eyes at the retreating corduroy coat as Pacey walked away and climbed on his bike, disappearing into the dark.

Just like she thought, she hadn't got any straight answers.

"Earth to Joey! Come in, Joey!" Bessie waved her hand in front of Joey's face. "Where did you go just then?"

Joey blinked. "Hmmm? Oh, nowhere! It's late. I must be getting tired." She stretched and yawned to prove her point. "Could you get off my bed, Bessie, so I can go to sleep?"

"Not until you tell me what's going on with you and Dawson."

Shrugging, Joey sighed, "I don't know. Same old thing… nothing, really. At this point, I'd just be happy to be friends and stay that way without any drama. Who knows what will happen?"

She bit the inside of her bottom lip. Then a warm smile gradually graced her face as she echoed Pacey's words, "It's a world of endless possibilities, right? Anything can happen."


	12. Silver Lining

Hey everyone! This week, we have two missing scenes which bookend the infamous **Four To Tango** episode. As always, we hope you enjoy and please let us know what you think. Thank you.

******** ****Silver Lining************

**I. Starlight**

Joey Potter was having a bad day.

No, rephrase that. A _terrible_ day.

It wasn't one thing that stood out to make her day so bad. It was the cumulative compilation of events: the alarm clock that didn't go off, making her late for school. The deep puddle that she didn't see in time, completely soaking her left foot. The book that she'd needed for class, the one safely sitting on the table at home because she'd forgotten to put it in her backpack that morning. The drink that she'd spilled down her top at lunch, much to the amusement of Pacey and Jack. The argument that she'd had with Bessie after school while Bessie tried to teach her how to drive, swearing tooth and nail she'd never teach Joey again. The endless questions spewing from Bessie's mouth as soon as they'd walked through the front door afterwards - "Can you feed Alexander for me, Joey? Have you washed the dishes yet, Joey? Did you do the laundry, Joey? When are you going to the store, Joey?"

Bessie's voice was the straw to Joey's camel's back.

She'd had enough.

In her mind, the problem came down to her location. If she wasn't _here_, none of this would be happening. She wanted out of Capeside, now more so than ever. The year and a half she had left until graduation couldn't go by soon enough in her opinion.

Then - sweet independence. She could start again; somewhere no one knew her or her history.

Except for the pesky little problem of financing that independence. Once the B&B was up and running she'd have even less free time on her hands, so getting a part-time job was out of the question right now. She knew she needed a college scholarship or she could kiss her dreams good-bye. Her only chance was to keep her grade-point average at a 4.0, giving those administrators no excuse but to accept her in their scholarship program.

Still, it was a shame she couldn't earn some extra cash just in case.

Shifting the heavy shopping basket onto her other arm, she blew the hair from her eyes and scanned the grocery list that Bessie had thrust in her hands just as she was leaving the house.

Bread, check.

Milk, check.

Apples, check.

Spaghetti sauce, check.

Tuna fish, check.

Soda, check.

Chex Mix, check.

She smiled to herself as she read the last item; looked like Pacey had cleaned them out, again.

Satisfied that she had everything Bessie needed, she put the list away and strolled over to the cashier. Smiling politely as she passed the ever inquisitive Mrs. Kennedy, Joey stopped short when, in her periphery vision, she caught sight of a colorful flyer pinned on the store's notice board. She stepped closer to read it properly.

_The Starlight Foundation's Annual Dance Scholarship Program... open to all Capeside students over the age of 16yrs... no previous dance experience required... full instruction provided... single dancers paired up with partners, if necessary.... must attend one of the two week courses to quality... scholarship given to the high school student who best exemplifies the spirit and grace of ballroom dancing... scholarship worth $1500... contact Miss Penny Pretty for more information... an experience to last a lifetime... now's the moment to start fulfilling your dream._

If someone were to ask her in ten years time what that flyer said she wouldn't have been able to tell them. All she knew was that she qualified, and the scholarship would provide a whole lot of money toward her college tuition.

She was applying. That was that.

So what if she had two left feet and didn't know the first thing about ballroom dancing? She'd done worse things in the past with the hopes of obtaining college money, hadn't she? Two words: beauty pageant. Learning to dance _had _to be better than singing live to a room full of people while wearing a formal dress, high-heels and bright red lipstick.

What's more, it wasn't like she was planning to tell anyone. The flyer said they'd provide dancing partners if needed. Although she didn't relish the idea of dancing with a stranger - and with her luck it would be an elderly man who thought it was cute to pinch her ass - what choice did she have? She could count on one hand the number of eligible partners she would even consider asking and all of them were out of the question as far as she was concerned. She'd never hear the end of it. Unfortunately, she didn't have dirt on any of them to twist their arm into being her partner and keeping quiet. She was on her own.

She snagged the flyer from the board and tucked it in her back pocket, smiling for the first time that day.

Maybe this wasn't such a bad day after all.

*****~*****

**II. Starbright**

Joey let Pacey's fingers slide from between hers as they tumbled out the front door of the Starlight Dance Studio into the night. He stuffed his suddenly empty hand into the pocket of his coat and bumped her shoulder, saying, "C'mon, Potter, I'll walk you home."

She didn't argue but shrugged, quickly slipping into her coat as they started off through the streets of Capeside toward her side of the creek.

"All that dancing… and for nothing!" Joey exclaimed shaking her head.

"Whaddaya mean – nothing? Look how well-equipped we'll be if…" Pacey paused.

"If what?" Joey insisted.

"Gimme a minute here. I'm thinkin'," Pacey tapped his chin comically.

Joey snorted, "Don't strain what little brain power you've got left in there - you need it!"

He glared at her playfully and then switching to a more serious tone, asked, "Hey, Jo, you're still gonna help me with my trig, right?"

"Er, you _do_ remember what Miss Pretty said in there?" She pointed over her shoulder. "No scholarship means no dancing. Our fair-trade deal is null and void. Why should I help?" she demanded.

Pacey skipped ahead a step and then turned to walk backwards in front of her. He put on his most pitiful face and beseeched her with just a little whine in his voice, "C'mon Jooooeeeey. You don't want me to fail, do you?"

She smirked at him and opened her mouth to speak when Pacey, still walking backwards, tripped on an uneven pavement. Instinctively grabbing his coat sleeve, she held on while he scrambled to regain his footing. "Doofus," she said, letting go of his sleeve as soon as he was steady. "Watch where you're going!"

He resumed his place next to her and they continued on their way. "Well…?"

"Well, what?" she feigned.

"Will you help me with my trig or not?"

"I don't know, Pacey," she said slowly. "I'm not sure I'm the right person to help you. I lack all the qualifications you seem to require to succeed in your academic endeavor."

"What do you mean _qualifications_? You're one of the brainiest people I know, Potter. And I happen to know you're doing great in that class."

"Because you've actually been showing up!" She laughed. "Here's the problem as I see it." She lifted her fingers one by one as she enumerated. "I'm not blonde, I'm immune to your questionable charms, and I have nothing with which to entice you but Chex Mix."

Pacey rolled his eyes. He was never going to live this down, was he?

Joey looked at him slyly and offered, "But I do know a blonde who may be able to help you."

"I told you, Joey. The limited time offer has expired. Besides, I don't think Jen's taking trig."

"Jen? Who's talking about Jen? Why don't you ask Dawson to help you? Maybe he's got something besides _snacks_ to persuade you to study."

Pacey laughed with a grimace, "Ewwww… You're just not right, you know that, Potter? You and I both know Dawson would make a terrible tutor. He'd start out talking about math and end up deconstructing Amistad."

"Hey, what _were_ you guys arguing about tonight, anyway?" Joey asked. "He seemed perfectly fine with your little arrangement with Jen."

Pacey coughed, "I told you. He thought that arrangement was with you."

Remembering the snippets that she had overheard from their conversation across the dance floor, Joey wanted to ask him what exactly he meant when he called her a goddess. Yet she quickly dismissed it as some kind of posturing between the two boys. Besides, if he turned that adamant declaration into a joke, her ever-present insecurities would rise up and knock the wind out of her and she just wasn't prepared for that tonight.

Instead, she pursued the usual line of dialogue, "Why would he care?" She looked at him from the corner of her eye. "Not that there would even be a remote possibility that you and I would…" she trailed off, turning to look ahead once more. "But Dawson and I are just friends." She frowned. "Does he really think I won't ever date again?"

Pacey shrugged, unwilling to pursue this topic with Joey after his exchange with Dawson on the dance floor. Dawson really was a douche bag sometimes.

Joey's voice rose, clearly annoyed now. "Isn't that just typical? He doesn't want me but he doesn't want anyone else to have me? Honestly, his head is just so-"

Attempting to halt the escalation of her ire, Pacey placed his hand on her shoulder and interrupted her mid-flow. "Now, Joey, you know Dawson can be a little protective when it comes to you. He's just lookin' out for ya."

Joey snorted. "Please, Pacey, don't patronize me. This isn't about Dawson looking out for me. This is about Dawson trying to put me in cold storage until he decides our relationship should be something more. We should tell him we're dating just to piss him off." She laughed.

"Whoa!" He raised both arms. "First, leave me out of your little revenge schemes. Second, I thought you'd be thrilled that he still thinks of you _that_ way."

She lifted her shoulder and let it drop with an uncomfortable look. She stated firmly, as if to convince herself as well, "Like I said, Dawson and I are just friends. My biggest concern right now is school - you know that."

"Well then, it can only help _you, _if you continue to tutor me in math. All that practice and repetition. Right? See how wonderful I am?" His voice was saccharine as he continued, "Always thinking of you, Jo." He slung his arm around her shoulder as they continued walking.

Joey ducked out from underneath his arm, breathing out a laugh, but she relented. "Come on then. Let's go study my house. We have a _lot_ ofwork to do if you're going to pass mid-terms. Now's as good a time as any to get started with that practicing."

Pacey stumbled in his stride, his voice raising an octave. "_Now_? See… er… I was thinkin' that we'd start like _tomorrow_?"

"_Now_, Pacey." Her voice meant business. "It's only 8 o'clock. We have plenty of time to get a lot of work done."

"But, Jo," he whined, "The Bruins are playing the Flyers tonight."

"And…?"

"And?! It's one of the biggest games of the season!"

Joey stopped walking and turned on her heel, leveling him with her eyes. "Look, either we work tonight or you can forget about my help. I have a busy schedule, you know! What's it gonna be?"

Pacey scrunched his lips, rolling them around in a circle as he considered. "Okay, fine." He raised a finger. "But we're keeping the TV on while we work."

"Not a chance." Then she quickly added when Pacey opened his mouth to dispute, "Do you want to pass trig or not?"

Pacey dropped his shoulders muttering under his breath that, no, he didn't _want_ to pass, that he didn't have any choice about it; he _needed_ to pass. "Fine."

They started moving again, their strides in sync as they strolled along the road.

"Slave driver."

"Slacker." Joey countered. She nudged his shoulder. "You'll thank me for it one day."

"Yeah." He laughed humorlessly. "Don't hold your breath, Potter."

Something inside Joey tugged at her seeing Pacey's face, which only a few moments ago had been carefree and happy, now look the opposite at the thought of missing his game. It was like she'd kicked a puppy. She sighed. "I never said we wouldn't take study breaks. If the TV was on during those breaks… that would be okay."

Pacey immediately perked up and grinned. "Really?"

"But you have to earn those study breaks, really concentrate on the math problems I give you to solve."

"Now, see… I always knew you had a softer side, Potter. Somewhere deep down inside. Way down. Deep, _deep,_ down. So deep you almost can't-"

"Knock it off, Pacey, before I change my mind and the TV stays off."

He chuckled good-naturedly doing as she requested. "You disappointed about the scholarship?"

Joey glanced up at him, surprised by the non sequitur. "Um, yeah, I guess. The money certainly would have come in handy." She added slyly, "But at least I don't have to dance with you anymore."

"Hey! I was good!"

"Right, tell that to my bruised toes." She let out a breath, going back to his original question. "I'm sure everything will work out. Scholarship or not, I will find a way to get out of Capeside."

"Wait, what's this? Joey Potter being positive?" Pacey quickly placed the palm of his hand on her forehead. "You sure you're feelin' alright? Not exhausted from keeping up with my smooth dance moves, are ya?"

She slapped his hand away. "No, Twinkle Toes. I feel fine." She tucked the loose hair from her ponytail behind her ears, keeping her voice airy. "What can I say? Someone recently told me anything can happen. Maybe I choose to believe them."

Pacey bobbed his head then dropped his chin, accepting her words and letting the matter drop. The small smile on his face indicated he was strangely pleased she'd remembered his words from Thanksgiving.

"What about you? Are you disappointed? That your limited time offer with Jen has expired?"

"Well, sure. I _am_ a guy and Lindley _is_ hot but I'm also relieved, you know?" His eyes sought hers and she nodded to indicate she understood. "As it turned out, Jen and I simply didn't have that all important chemistry factor goin' for us. Trying to make something happen that just wasn't there, well… I care about Jen's friendship too much to do that."

He clapped his hands together and smiled, "Let's get a move on, Potter. There are math problems to be solved and the sooner they are, the sooner I get to see me a hockey game."

Joey returned his smile, gesturing with her arm for him to lead the way. "Home, Jeeves."

Pacey's eyes were warm with nostalgia as he replied, "Yes, Miss Daisy."


	13. Manifold

**A/N**: Ask and you shall receive… you wanted to see scenes featuring our favorite duo since the epi was so lacking, well, we did too  This week we have two missing scenes from the **First Encounters of the Close Kind** epi. As always, thanks for your ongoing support – both private and online – and please let us know what you think.

******** ****Manifold**** *~***

**I.**

Concentrating solely on the task at hand, earbuds firmly in place, Pacey didn't hear his name being called until Doug reached into his cruiser and cranked up the siren for a scant few seconds. Startled, Pacey dropped the screwdriver he was holding, his attention most definitely caught – much like the seagulls who had scattered at the unwelcomed disruption.

"What the hell, Dougie?" Pacey pressed his back alongside the railing of the _True Love_, yanking the buds out of his ears.

Arms now folded across his chest, Doug leaned against the car and smirked from behind his shades. He shrugged, "What's up, little brother?"

"What do you want? I'm a little busy here."

"Just doing my rounds and thought I'd check in. How goes it up there?"

"Great. Just great."

Perusing the _True Love_, Doug looked skeptical. "Where's your slave labor?"

Pacey bent down to pick up the fallen screwdriver, avoiding Doug's gaze. "What are ya talking about?"

"You and Joey have been attached at the hip for weeks. Where is she?"

Pacey shrugged and returned his attention to the interrupted task. "She's in Boston for some college thing," he mumbled.

"How come you didn't go, too?"

Pacey raised his chin up to the cloudless sky. "Weather's too good to waste the weekend away indoors."

Doug nodded slowly, his expression giving nothing away, but he didn't press the matter. "Well, we could use some help hanging drywall over at the Potter's tomorrow afternoon, if you can get away from here, that is."

"Yeah. Sure. No problem," Pacey answered amicably.

"See ya then, Pacey." Doug climbed into his cruiser and gunned the engine.

Pacey watched the police car ease out of the boatyard onto the road. Doug's question about Joey's whereabouts had hit a nerve. Because it wasn't just Joey that had gone to Boston; Dawson and the McPhees had gone, too. Seems everyone was on the college track.

Except him.

Shoot, he'd be happy… no, make that lucky… just to _pass_ trigonometry class. And he knew he might accomplish that feat only through sheer determination and badgering by Miss Potter.

He understood college was right up her alley. He admired her for her focus. But he was beginning to realize that particular alley was filled with his friends as well. Yes, they were all headed for the halls of higher learning eventually.

Unfortunately, his alley seemed destined to lead somewhere a lot more vocational and a little less academic.

Pacey turned away from the lot and gazed out across the water, the offshore breeze ruffling his hair familiarly. He was starting to seriously think he might be much happier and have a better chance of success on the sea – maybe the Coast Guard or the Merchant Marines – than he would in a classroom.

He wasn't sure what either of those choices entailed. The thought of trading his Hawaiian shirts for a uniform and having to abide by someone else's rules and regimented routine was something he would have to carefully consider before making any rash decisions. He definitely wasn't interested in following in the footsteps of his Pop or Deputy Doug.

Looking down at the screwdriver that he still held in his hand, as if wondering how it got there, Pacey shook himself like a dog to clear his head. Well, tomorrow was tomorrow as they say and the _True Love_ wasn't going to become seaworthy by herself. Right now the task before him was clear and, slipping his earbuds back into place, he got back to work.

Who knows - perhaps while his friends were pursuing their dreams at college, he'd leave Capeside behind and sail his girl clear around the world; the wind and stars as his teacher and the ocean as his classroom.

The future may just surprise him yet.

**********

**II.**

"What extracurricular activities are you going to sign up for this year? Because you know it's so important to have those on your permanent record when you apply. I already have my stint on the disciplinary committee and my volunteer hours at the hospital, and next I'm thinking of signing up for something creative. That should give me a well-rounded list-"

"Thanks for the ride, Andie," Joey interrupted as she unhooked her seat belt and leapt from the car, grabbing her bags on the way. "See ya later, Jack!" She slammed the car door shut and hiked her bags over her shoulder. She paused to wave goodbye as the car pulled out the driveway before hurrying to her front door.

"Bye, Joey!" She heard Andie call. "See you at school!"

Joey wondered what was up with Jack. He'd sat staring out the window of the passenger seat the entire way from the train station. He hadn't done more than grunt unintelligibly when they had dropped off Dawson and now didn't seem to even notice that she had vacated the Saab. She suspected something had happened to him in Boston. What, she didn't know. As with most men in her life at the moment, he didn't seem inclined to share his story - that was even if Andie had paused long enough for Joey to ask.

The sound of pounding assaulted her as she pushed through the door. "Bessie!" she called out. "I'm home."

"In here," came Bessie's muffled shout. Joey followed her voice to find Bessie in the kitchen valiantly fighting a losing battle with drywall dust.

"You realize that we're ingesting this stuff by the pound, right?" Bessie said loudly as she wiped off the front of the refrigerator. "That can't be good."

Joey dumped her bags on a kitchen chair and, raising her voice also to be heard, suggested, "Why don't you just leave it until they're done?"

"Because by then we'll be mummified by the stuff!" Bessie replied just as loudly as she moved to wipe down the counters. "How was it?" Her piercing voice echoed into the sudden quiet as the hammering stopped.

They could hear voices from the other room as the construction crew made plans to call it a day.

Joey laughed and then answered her. "Everything I ever dreamed of, Bess." She slipped out of her coat and threw it on top of her bags as she talked. "The Gothic architecture, the commons, the student union, the classrooms… just as I always imagined."

Bessie stopped wiping and turned to properly study her sister's appearance, noting her shining eyes and the color in her cheeks. "Okay, tell me everything! Did you get to go to a class? What was your roommate like? Oh, and the dorms! Are they coed?" she asked slyly.

"Hey, Potter! You're back!" Pacey poked through the heavy plastic sheeting that separated the kitchen from the construction area.

"Nothing gets by you, does it, Pacey?" Joey quipped.

"Couldn't miss that screeching, even over the noise in there," he jibed.

"You shouldn't talk about Bessie that way. She might get offended and decide not to feed you anymore," Joey threatened.

"Hey! Leave me out of your childish nonsense. Are you hungry, Jo?" Bessie opened the refrigerator.

"I am." Pacey interjected.

"That goes without saying," Bessie answered him. "I never even need to ask. You're like a bottomless pit."

Pacey gave her his most charming smile. "You know me so well, Bessie. If it weren't for your gracious hospitality and outstanding culinary skills, I might starve."

Bessie rolled her eyes in true Potter fashion. "Go finish cleaning up. Dinner will be ready in less than 30 minutes," she said as she took ground beef patties out and set them on the counter. "My outstanding culinary skills are preparing hamburgers." She paused. "Again."

Pacey rocked back on his heels and rubbed his hands together. "That _is_ outstanding!" He proclaimed and ducked back through the plastic sheeting.

Bessie looked over her shoulder at Joey, as she turned on the burner under the pan on the stove. "Where were we? Oh yeah… coed dorms."

Joey smirked, "Bessie, that's _not_ all there is to college, you know." She began to gather chips, pickles and condiments and place them on the table.

"Oh, I know. I'm just yanking your chain. Knowing you, you didn't even talk to a college guy while you were there. Am I right?" She asked, raising an eyebrow. "As a matter of fact, knowing you, you spent the entire time haunting the library and checking out English classes. Or did your roommate show you a slice of the real college life? "

"I'll have you know, I not only went to an English class _and _got a special tour of the library but I did it all _with_ a college guy!" Joey exclaimed.

Bessie's eyes grew wide, dinner momentarily forgotten. "Do tell."

"And _then,_ I spent the night with him!"

"Joey!" Bessie sounded scandalized but returned to her preparations.

In the midst of drywall dust disposal, Pacey's bent form suddenly shot straight as a bean pole. He shoved a finger in his ear to clear out the dust. He couldn't have heard that correctly. Joey Potter spent the night with a college guy?

He unobtrusively moved closer to the opaque curtain, allowing him to catch bits and pieces of their conversation as Joey continued. "… mix-up… gender ambiguous names… got off on the wrong foot…"

And then Bessie, "… spent the night… alone in his room… was he cute?…"

Pacey's brow furrowed as he wondered just what the hell kind of activities these school-sponsored field trips were… well… sponsoring! He came back into the kitchen just in time to hear Joey lower her voice and confide to Bessie, "He asked me for my phone number."

"Do you think he'll call?"

Joey ducked her head a little and tucked a piece of errant hair behind her ear. She shrugged. "I don't know. Probably not. After all, he's in college and he's brilliant. Why would he?"

Pacey chose that moment to make his presence known. "Why would who what?"

Joey looked up to see Pacey nonchalantly brushing his clothes free of the ubiquitous dust. Debating for a heartbeat, she answered his question with a question. "Who what?"

"Why would who what?" Pacey repeated.

"Don't know what you're talking about." She shot a meaningful glance at Bessie and cleared her throat. "How goes the addition?"

His blue eyes pierced her with his gaze. 'So she didn't want to talk about college guy, huh? Whatever. What respectable college guy is going to mess around with a lowly high school girl anyway? Nah. This guy wouldn't call.' Feeling oddly happier after his internal debate, he played along and let the subject drop. "Coming along nicely, thank you very much. And before you ask, yes, I did find time to complete those trig questions you assigned me. But I want to know how _your_ weekend went. Was the college experience everything you thought it would be?"

Joey smiled mysteriously, "And more."

"Do tell," Pacey unintentionally repeated Bessie's earlier appeal.

Joey waved her hand at him airily, saying evasively, "It's all academics, Pacey. Nothing you'd be interested in."

"Got me there." He narrowed his eyes at her and smirked. He changed subjects yet again. "Hey, did our Blair Witch rip-off win an Oscar?"

Joey shook her head, her chocolate tresses escaping from their appointed place behind her ear. She promptly tucked them back before answering. "It didn't. As a matter of fact, from what Dawson said, it was not received well at all. He was pretty discouraged."

"The whole project _was _lame."

"Pacey!"

"Well, it was!"

"You got a good grade out of it!"

"What does Green know about film-making? He graded us on it as a history project!"

"Regardless. I think those hipper-than-thou film brats were awfully hard on him."

"Did you comfort him, Potter?" Pacey crooned at her. "Did you make it all better?"

"Shut up, Pacey." Joey turned away from his mockery to retrieve dishes from the cupboard. Grabbing plates and then silverware from the drawer, she stepped around him to set the table. "Besides, he was sitting with someone from the festival on the train ride home."

"Another film geek?" Bessie queried, stretching down to pluck Alex from his playpen.

"I don't know. Maybe. But a girl geek, in that case."

Pacey and Bessie both said, "A girl?"

Then Pacey continued, "What is it with that guy and public transportation as a pickup venue? I gotta start travelling more often."

Joey smirked at him, "As if that would help."

Bessie carried a platter of food to the table in one hand with Alexander on her other hip. "Looks like you both got lucky this weekend."

Joey shot her an evil death glare.

Pacey's eyebrows searched for his hairline. "You got lucky, too? So _that's_ what this "academics" you speak of is all about? Hmmm. I gotta tell ya, that's the kind of academics I would definitely be interested in."

"_You'd_ have better luck on public transportation, Pace." She pointed to a chair. "Sit. Dinner's ready."

Pacey sat down but pursued his line of questioning, ignoring her taunt. Now that the vetoed topic had been reintroduced, he couldn't resist the follow through. "Does Dawson know?"

Bessie looked at Joey with raised eyebrows of her own as she settled Alex into his high chair before taking a seat next to him.

Exasperated, Joey huffed, "Know what? That I went to Junior Day at Worthington? Yes. Kind of hard not to, wouldn't you think? Since he was there."

Pacey waggled his eyebrows. "But does he know about the _academics_ in which you were partaking, Josephine?" Pacey caught Bessie's eye. "You have to be so careful when you let the kids go the big city these days. You just never know what kind of _academics_ they're going to get into!" He pretended to wipe a tear from his eye. "They grow up so fast."

True to form, Joey rolled her eyes as Bessie and Pacey began to laugh. Then she shook her head and gave into laughter along with them as conversation around the table continued. She'd had a glimpse of her exciting future at Worthington but here in her own home, with the company of people she cared about, she was content. Right now, she couldn't think of any place she'd rather be.

As the Potter sisters lapsed into conversation about wallpaper colors for the guest rooms, Pacey was suddenly preoccupied with an unsettled feeling in the pit of his stomach; but for the life of him he couldn't figure out its cause.

His mind was stuck right then wondering about Joey's answer to the question "was he cute?", which was not only ridiculous - as why the hell would he care either way what the answer was, especially since he'd already concluded the guy wasn't going to call - but immensely frustrating.

Because if he could just get that unimportant question out of his mind, he'd have a clear head again - allowing him to figure out and resolve whatever the actual problem was that was causing his uneasy stomach.

Pacey shook his head to himself and smirked. Just like that Potter girl to annoy him without even trying.


	14. Rummaging

**A/N: **Happy Friday everyone! **Barefoot At Capeside** was another epi which would have been vastly improved if it simply had a P/J scene in it, in our humble opinions. So that's exactly what we did ;) This missing scene takes place just before the end of the epi. We hope you like it. Not long now till **A** **Weekend In The Country**! Are you as excited as we are?! LOL

Thanks so much for your continuing support; to know that our work is not only being read but enjoyed, it means the world to us. And every time a new author/story alert is created for M&M Works or our story is added as a favorite, you put a warm smile on our faces. We thank you for that, too.

*******~ Rummaging *******

After knocking briefly, Pacey pushed open the newly-hung door of the newly-completed addition to the newly-named Potter Bed & Breakfast and stepped inside. Of course, the construction was complete but the addition did seem to be lacking… something. Oh yeah… furniture, curtains and all the other accoutrements that make B&B's homey. Still, the police auxiliary – and anyone else they had been able to recruit - had done an exemplary job. The drywall was smooth, the painting perfect, the windows installed.

Pacey looked around and felt a surge of pride warm the general vicinity of his heart.

"Jo?" He called. He didn't get an answer but heard faint bumping and scraping from above him. Someone was in.

"Bessie?" He tried. Still no response.

Raising his voice, he shouted, "Hey, Potter!" There, that should draw either of them.

"Pacey?" Joey's muffled voice drifted down from above.

"Jo? Where _are_ you?" Looking up as he went, Pacey headed down the hallway toward the sound of her voice until he found a metal ladder jutted up against the wall, leading to a square hole in the ceiling.

Her face loomed down at him. "Up here."

"What are ya doing up there?" Pacey peered up at her taking in her disheveled appearance.

Joey didn't answer his question but issued a directive instead. "Well, don't just stand there. Come on up."

"Why?" He quizzed.

"What are you? Two? You can help me find stuff to decorate the new rooms with, that's why."

"Decorate? Um… you got the wrong Witter for that. Lemme go get Doug." He took a step away from the bottom of the ladder as if to leave.

Joey was not amused. "Get back here! What are you doing here anyway? I thought you passed your trig mid-term and my indentured servitude as your tutor was over?"

Pacey smirked and, ignoring her questions, said, "I'm coming up before I get a crick in my neck."

Joey backed up as Pacey's head popped through the floor of the attic.

"Hey! Look at all this stuff!" he said enthusiastically, peering about the crowded space. Furniture, trunks and chests lined the walls, and boxes were stacked everywhere else. "I didn't know this was up here." He climbed the remainder of the rungs and promptly hit his head on the sloped, low ceiling. "OUCH!"

Joey cringed and then sniggered. "Watch your head."

He glared at her as he rubbed the top of his head. "Thanks," he said dryly.

Joey returned to an open box she had set on an old coffee table and began rummaging inside. She tossed out small pillows in Pacey's general direction and when he didn't catch them all, yelled, "Careful! Don't let them get dusty! Why don't you start on that box?" She pointed to indicate which box she meant.

Pacey regarded her as if she'd gone daft. "Why don't we just take the boxes downstairs before you start taking all the stuff out?"

"Because we're not going to use all the stuff. And then we'll just have to get them back up here. If you don't want to help, don't!" She paused to blow errant hairs off her face. "Pacey, we need to get those rooms decorated. Like yesterday. We can't have guests here until those rooms are finished. No guests, no income!"

Pacey held up both hands, "Okay, okay, Potter. Don't get your panties in a twist. Let's get one box empty so we can put stuff in it that we're going to take downstairs. Where's Bessie, anyway?"

"I don't know. She wasn't here when I got home and there was a note for me to come up here and start looking." She surveyed the cramped space, overwhelmed. "As if I didn't have anything else to do," she muttered.

"You just said that this had to be done _yesterday_," Pacey rebutted. "Gimme that box."

Joey handed him the box of assorted treasures collected by Lillian Potter in anticipation of this very dream come true. She watched as he carefully and gently took each item out of the box and set it on the table.

His gaze caught hers then and he said quietly, "Now - of these items, which are we taking downstairs?"

She sighed heavily and moved to sit on the dusty floor in front of the low table. Slowly, she began to examine each piece and make choices. She set her selections in the empty box. Pacey took the next box and began to empty it onto the available spaces on the table. He then used his empty box for Joey's rejects.

They worked side-by-side quietly for a few minutes until Joey broke the silence. "What are you doing here?"

"Helping, obviously. I think it's a tossup as to who's the indentured servant in this relationship." Pacey grumbled.

Truth be told, he was glad of something to do here. Now that the addition was finished and he'd passed his mid-term, he didn't really have a legitimate reason to stop by the Potter house every day. And with the weather getting colder, he couldn't really expect Jo to spend a lot of time working on the _True Love_.

"But you didn't come over to help," she insisted. "What's up?"

"What? Nothing. I came over to check out the Pacey J. Witter Wing since I knew they finished painting yesterday."

"It looks great, doesn't it?"

He nodded. "Yeah, they did a nice job. Who'd have thought our plan would be such a success?"

"It's not really a success yet," Joey stated pragmatically. "We still have to get people to come here and stay."

"Build it and they will come," Pacey intoned in his best James Earl Jones impersonation.

Joey rolled her eyes but laughed anyway.

"Did you…" they both started at once.

"Go ahead, Pace," Joey said graciously as she got up from the floor and began to open flaps and peer inside other boxes.

"Did you ever hear from college boy?"

Joey muttered under her breath. "Of course, _you'd _ask."

"What does that mean?" Pacey said defensively. "I was _here_ when you came home all rosy-cheeked and smiley from college weekend."

"Well, it seems you may be the only one of my many, many friends who is interested."

And by "many", she meant Dawson. Not only had he never shown the slightest bit of curiosity (or jealousy) about A.J. but it seemed that it would be entirely unwarranted anyway as A.J. had not even called. Joey wondered what exactly was wrong with her; that the minute she was out of sight, a boy didn't have any trouble forgetting her.

"Ahhh, the light dawns," Pacey nodded knowingly. "Dawson isn't even the littlest bit jealous of your foray into higher learning."

"Oh, he's too busy with Miss Film Geek to even bother asking what's going on with me." The decibel level of Joey's voice began to rise. "Well, whatever. If he wants a new confidante, one who doesn't even know him well enough to understand him, then she can have him."

Pacey's eyebrows arched. "And you won't care one little bit." He paused. "Right?"

"Why would I?" She shrugged and looked into the box. Then she turned, hands flailing. "He took all his posters down!" she shouted.

"Whoa! His Spielberg posters?" Pacey asked incredulous.

"Duh. That's the only thing he had up in there. Every time a new set of breasts catch his eye and they say 'jump', he asks 'how high'!"

"Film Girl told him to take his posters down?" Pacey asked with some skepticism.

"Well, not exactly."

Joey proceeded to share the details of her last encounter with Dawson as Pacey reached for the next box. When she was finished, Pacey feigned preoccupation with its contents while he debated which words of wisdom to bestow upon the stressed-out brunette. He thought again of what a douche bag Dawson could be but knew he dare not disparage her precious friend. If they ever did get back together, she'd never forget his words. On the other hand, telling her the truth and perhaps, persuading her to look forward, seemed like something a good friend would do.

He settled on repeating her words back to her, "Well, you yourself said that there was no reason you two shouldn't date other people. You're just friends. Did you expect him to wait for you while you checked out college guy? Who's putting who in cold storage?"

Joey pursed her lips with chagrin, "Do you remember everything?"

Pacey grinned at her, "Oh yeah. It's a gift - and it comes in handy."

Joey sighed before confessing in a soft voice, "It's just… it's hard to see him confide in someone who is essentially a stranger."

Pacey remembered what Jen said at the dance studio. It seemed that Joey relished her role as main confidante to her two best friends and losing her place wasn't easy. He patted her on the shoulder. "It's growing pains, Jo. That's all. People grow, stretch their wings, try new things. It doesn't mean that they forget their old friends."

"I guess," she answered, her voice dubious.

"Take me, for example. I'm gonna try something new. I just landed the lead in the school play."

"Seriously?" She immediately perked up. "That's awesome, Pacey. Whatever in the world made you audition?"

"I was recruited by Mr. Broderick himself."

It was Joey's turn to look skeptical. "Really?"

"Yeah. He said I was a natural with comedy."

"Well, he got that right," Joey remarked dryly. "You _are_ a clown."

"Hardy-har-har, Josephine. I'll have you know, I nailed the audition."

Joey guessed, "But were you on time?"

Pacey ignored her and confided, "The only thing is…"

"What?" Joey looked interested.

"Andie's the assistant director."

"So? Is that a problem for you? You guys seemed okay at Thanksgiving."

"It's a problem for her. She said she's doing it to get over me."

Joey shook her head. "She's doing it so she has something creative to put on her college apps. If I can tolerate Film Girl, you and Andie should be able to work together on a school play."

"We're gonna have to. Broderick is basing my English grade on my participation. Hey…" Pacey exclaimed with sudden inspiration, "You can help me with my lines."

Joey considered the proposition briefly. "Sure. Why not?"

Pacey smiled, satisfied. There - _now_ he had a reason to stop by the Potter B&B. Maybe if he timed it right, he would still get invited to dinner every night.

Joey pulled a tube of slick paper out of the box in front of her and unrolled it. "Hey, look at this!"

He looked over her shoulder as the image was revealed. "John Lennon. Who's is that?"

"Probably belonged to one of my parents." She looked at the glossy poster thoughtfully. "Mitch and Gale had a bunch of the Beatles' albums and they were all the same age. I think Bessie's a little young for the Beatles." She stared at the Imagine poster for a few moments longer, deep in thought, before re-rolling and adding it to the box to go downstairs.

"Planning on a British Invasion-themed room?" Pacey quipped.

"Nope." She smiled enigmatically.

Pacey shrugged and didn't press.

"So, what play is the school doing this year?" Joey asked as they carried on rummaging through the boxes.

"Er… Barefoot in the…," Pacey said slowly, struggling to remember.

She helped him out with the name. "The Park?"

"Yeah, that's the one."

"Great. Learning lines with you is going to be oh-so-much fun," she said sarcastically coupled with an eye roll. "You can't even remember the title. I take that back about you remembering everything."

"Hey! I remember the important stuff!"

"Like?"

"Like I got the lead role… his name is Paul… and he's married to a smokin' hot wife. They're newlyweds, meaning there's plenty of kissing scenes with my leading lady." He waggled his eyebrows.

"Lucky girl." Joey stated, her tone indicating the exact opposite.

"Isn't she just?" He smiled broadly, puffing his chest out causing Joey to roll her eyes again.

They continued to fill boxes in comfortable silence for a little while until Joey commented, "With all the work you're doing on the _True Love_, school and now this play, I guess you're not going to have a lot of spare time, huh?"

"I guess… why?" His voice was cautious, wondering where her train of thought was going.

Joey ducked her head, avoiding his eye as she added a framed picture to the box in front of her. Bessie and she had discussed the other day their need for a handy-man around the place, seeing as Bodie was out of town so much. Pacey was of course the prime candidate - the only in fact - but the stubborn independent streak in Joey made it hard for her to come out with a flat out request for help.

So in usual Potter fashion, she opted to deliver her request in a rapid flood of words. "Well, here's the thing. Bodie's not here right now, but, of course you know that. And seriously, can you see Dawson with a hammer in his hand? Or fixing a toilet? And there's only so much Bessie and I know about how to mend a furnace, and it'll be years before Alex is old enough to, and it's not like we have the time anyway as winter is coming and…. and… well?!" She pierced his eyes with hers.

"Well what?" Pacey responded, utterly confused.

She sighed, irritated. "Do you want the job or not?"

Still confused, Pacey scratched his head. "Er… Job?"

"Yes, _job_! Were you not listening to what I just said?"

"I did my best, Potter, I swear I did. But all I got was Dawson and a toilet."

She placed her hand on her hip. "The handy-man job, of course!"

He opened his eyes wide, surprised. "Oh. Um, well, sure."

Joey let out a breath she didn't know she was holding. "We'll pay you of course. I mean, it won't be a lot at first until we get a steady stream of guests in but-"

Pacey held up his hands. "Hey, don't worry about it, Jo."

"No, we want to-"

He interrupted again. "We can work something out. For now, consider hot meals ala Bessie and your free labor on _True Love_ payment enough."

Joey eyed him warily. "If you're sure…"

"Completely."

She gave him a shy smile. "Thank you, Pacey."

He bobbed his head and shuffled his feet. "Welcome. Thanks for, um, for askin' me."

She gave him an "are you stupid" look. "Like there's anyone else I'd ask." Then added matter-of-factly, "We need you, Pacey."

He watched as she turned her back to grab another box from the shelf, allowing a warm smile to spread across his face. Surprisingly, he felt better about the play and Andie by just coming over here. Joey seemed to be less stressed, too.

Together these days, they always seemed to figure things out, without even trying.

Lifting one of the boxes that was ready to take downstairs, he let out a mock groan at its weight. "Yeah, need me to carry heavy boxes you mean. Those skinny arms of yours aren't exactly any help."

"Hey!" She whipped around and flung bubble wrap at him. When he bopped his head again on the low ceiling as moved out the way, she didn't try to hide her laughter - feeling his bruised head a fitting justice to her bruised ego.

Pacey massaged the bump with his free hand while he walked over to the ladder with the box. As he carefully began to descend he said, "Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up, Potter. Let's see how funny you think it is trying to get down without a ladder."

She dropped her jaw only to immediately snap it shut again. Then she narrowed her eyes. "Oh, you wouldn't!"

Pacey grinned mischievously; he couldn't have Joey _too_ stress-free now, could he? "Oh, I _would_."

Once at the bottom, he shifted the box to under his arm and swiftly moved the metal ladder out of her reach.

Joey scrambled over to the attic opening and glowered down at him. In a calm and controlled voice she quietly commanded, "Pacey, you have exactly _two_ seconds to-"

Cupping a hand to his ear, he began to walk backwards. "What's that, Jo? You think I should go lie down?"

"Pacey-"

"What a good idea!" He nodded, still walking away. "Yep, I totally agree. Head trauma and all that. Serious stuff."

"Oh, I'll give you head trauma alright." Her voice was deadly now, "Pacey, I swear if-"

"You gonna be OK up there by your lonesome?"

"Pacey, I mean it, if you-"

"You sure?"

"_Pacey_-"

"Well, if you're _sure_ you're sure. Alright then. Be back later, Toots. Yell if you need me." With that he disappeared out of her sight.

"Pacey? Pacey? _Pacey Witter_! _You get back here. Right. Now!"_

Casually strolling into the kitchen with the box under his arm, Pacey laughed out loud when he could still hear her protests, threats, insults and name-calling even from there.

At one particularly charming insult, he shouted back to her with a huge smile on his face, "Love you, too, Potter!"

Teasing Joey Potter? It never got old.


	15. Discovery

**A/N**: Well, here we are at last. Pacey has _finally_ gotten a clue! LOL That's right, folks, we have reached the **A Weekend In The Country** epi. Yayee! This week's ficlet has two parts. Now, the astute of you will remember that we said at the beginning of the series that we were only going to write scenes based on what we knew from canon up to the current epi, and not take into account what we knew would happen later on. Well… for the first part in this ficlet, we've bent the rules and made an exception. The opportunity to write that scene was simply too irresistible to turn down. Hopefully you'll forgive us ;)

As usual, we'd like to thank everyone for reading and for their ongoing support to our story. Thanks, guys!

************ Discovery ************

"The only real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes."  
- _Marcel Proust, novelist (1871-1922)_

**I.**

Pacey's legs bounced while he waited for the bell to signal the end of class; he was up and out of his seat the moment it rang. Throwing his backpack haphazardly over his shoulder, he jogged over to the door and leapt into the hallway. He took a moment to scan the rapidly growing crowd before he found what he was looking for. Homing in on the back of her blue sweater as she wormed her way through the other students, he called out her name.

"Joey!"

She didn't acknowledge him but continued to walk in the direction of her locker.

"Jo? Potter! Oh, Josephine! I know you can hear me. Wait up!"

Realizing that she wasn't going to stop, Pacey sighed and pushed his way through his fellow classmates to follow her. She was already at her locker by the time he caught up so he leaned against the vacant one beside it and waited. He watched as she crisply dialed her combination then replaced the books from her bag with the ones she needed from inside her locker.

He couldn't help smiling to himself when he recognized the blue sweater she wore. It was the one with small snowflakes that he knew she liked so much, but hardly wore. Shame. It looked cute on her. Shaking his head at _that_ random thought, he focused back on the matter at hand.

Joey had been quiet all morning. And it bothered him.

He bit his bottom lip and opened with, "What's up?"

No response bar an eye roll from the sullen brunette.

He tilted his head slightly and tried to catch her eye. "Ignoring me, huh?"

Again, no reply.

"Is this still about the other day? Come on. I said I was sorry."

Nada.

"I came back, didn't I? You were only up there for what, like, an hour, tops."

Stone silence.

"Can I help it if I fell asleep in front of the TV?"

If there were crickets resident in the corridors of Capeside High they'd be chirping right about now.

"Okay. Next time we're in your attic, _you _can leave _me _up there, deal?" __

Still no reaction. Not good.

It bugged him that Joey was mad at him. Well, in reality, Joey was _always_ mad at him for some reason or another. That was nothing new. That he could deal with. It _was_ part of their dynamic after all, the back and forth. What was unsettling him right now was the lack of volley back from her. He didn't like it one bit when she went all silent on him like she was now.

While it had never worried him in the past, for some reason it did now. A lot. And he wanted to get to the bottom of it.

"Is it a woman thing then? You got cramps or something?" He studied her closely, daring her with his words and stare to take the bite.

She almost did. Her hand froze and she opened her mouth to retort but didn't get further than an irritated sigh, using the excess air to blow her hair from her eyes, before shoving another book in her bag. But he didn't miss that her cheeks started to burn.

"Have you tried Tylenol? It's supposed to help with that."

Cheeks bright red now.

She slammed her locker shut and began walking briskly to her next class.

"Joooeeey," he sing-songed, springing into step beside her. "Tell me what's wrong..."

When she still said nothing, he resorted to the old 'actions-speak-louder-than-words' trick and reached up with his hand to flick her ear.

Success!

"Pacey!" Joey slapped his hand away, finally breaking the silent treatment. "Knock it off, would you!"

"Aha! _See_! I knew you couldn't ignore me forever. So, how about it, you gonna-"

"Pacey, go away. I'm not in the mood."

"It's the hormones talkin', isn't it? Don't worry, I get it. I have three sisters, remember? Well, four if you count Doug-"

Gauging from her face that he was losing her and, not wanting to risk that she'd clam up again, he quickly changed topics. His hands were in constant motion as he spoke. "Okay, fine. So, it's not cramps; you must still be mad at me then about being trapped in the attic. Am I right? Like I said, I'm sorry. Just say three little words, Jo, and I'll be out of your hair. It's easy. Here, I'll even help you out. Say, 'I forgive you, Pacey.'" He paused to mentally count the number of words he'd just said. "OK, so technically that's _four_ words, but you don't need to-"

Having had enough of Pacey's babbling, Joey stopped short and spun around to face him fully, shouting, "Look, Pacey, I just found my mother's bracelet this morning, so why don't you cut me some slack?!"

Pacey's eyes instantly dropped to her wrist where he could just make out a delicate bracelet tucked underneath the sleeve of her sweater. Instinctively, his hand reached out and brushed the material away so he could take a better look at the elegant detail.

"Your Mom's, huh?" His voice had a husky quality, completely inappropriate for a bustling school hallway but somehow Joey still heard him.

With her free hand she tucked her hair behind her ear. "Yeah," she confirmed her voice just as quiet. "I… I didn't mean to snap before. It's just... you know how I get when... well, you know."

They stood like that for a moment, his hand resting upon her wrist, until he slowly pulled her sleeve to put it back in place. Eyes now scanning her face, he gave her an understanding smile – one which she returned.

That's why she'd been in a weird mood. She'd been thinking about her mom, not upset at him. "S'Kay. I thought you were still mad about the other day is all."

"What? No." She waved her hand in a dismissive gesture. "I got over that as soon as I'd relieved my bladder."

"Oh. Well, um, good."

"Actually, I should thank you."

That confused him. "Thank me?"

"Yeah. If you hadn't left me up there for so long, I wouldn't have found the box with my Mom's ornaments. It was buried in another box that I brought downstairs. I didn't even see the jewelry box 'til I unpacked everything this morning."

"Well, I guess, you're welcome?"

She laughed, her face finally lighting up with a lop-sided smile. "I guess."

"Ah, she smiles." He said as though to himself. After a pause, he clapped his hands and rubbed them together, at a loss as to what else to do. "So we're good?"

She nodded. "Good."

"Great."

"Great."

A huge smile erupted across his face. "Well, alright then."

The bell for the next class rang shrilly, stopping further conversation. Conscious of his less than stellar record for punctuality in Mrs. Osterday's art class, he stepped into action and began walking backwards down the hall, causing other students to scatter out of his way.

"Still on for practicing my lines after school?"

"Sure."

"Meet you at the usual place?"

"Uh-huh, I'll be there." She agreed easily, adding as an afterthought, "Don't forget your script this time!"

"Roger that." He spun around and had only taken a few steps when he whipped back to face her again. "Hey, Potter!"

Having already started to continue to walk to her own class, she turned to look over her shoulder and gave him a curious look. "Yeah?"

"The bracelet. I like it." He smiled, saying sincerely, "It suits you."

With that, he broke out into a flat run toward the art department, his steps lighter than they had been all day.

**********

**II.**

Leaving the Potter family - including the itinerant Bodie - to bask in the successful charming of Fred Fricke, I slip out of the B&B and head to Molly's Market to restock. I'm happy for some time to myself; it will give me a chance to see if I can find Henry Carr. He's the best furnace guy in Capeside, and he's honest, too. When I first approached him about the furnace a few weeks back, he'd looked at me knowingly when we… well _I… _decided to refurbish the existing furnace instead of installing a new one. Bessie and Joey still can't afford a new one but hopefully Henry will work his magic and make this one last until next winter when they can.

It's a good thing BessieMac let me borrow their truck because it's just a little too cold to be tooling around on my bike; besides should they need one, Bodie's car is there. Hunched over the steering wheel, waiting for the heater to warm up, I wind my way through the quiet streets. The overcast sky and chill air coming in off the cape are keeping most folks sensibly snug in their homesteads today.

Radio broken, I'm left to my own thoughts as entertainment. It's the first time all weekend that I've had a quiet moment and I find myself replaying moments from the last couple of days, starting with Joey's startling revelation that Bessie is thinking of mortgaging the house. My short stint at playing house with Andie during that class assignment last year is the only experience I've had with the "real" world of home buying, family planning and household budgets - but even I know that if you don't pay your mortgage, you get evicted and lose your house.

My hands clench the steering wheel, knuckles turning white. No matter what, I'm determined that's not gonna happen to the Potters. Mrs. Potter left them this house and it's not going to be taken from them, not if I can help it.

My attention monetarily distracted by a passing car, it's only then that I notice just how hard I'm holding the wheel. I immediately ease up, flexing my hands as the blood rushes back. Startled by my strong physical reaction, I know I can no longer ignore the question that has been banging around the inside of my head ever since Mitch asked it.

Why _do_ I care so much?

Somewhere along the line, making sure the B&B is successful and supports my two favorite sisters has gone from a mild interest to monumental importance. Since when did they become my responsibility?

Dragging my hand through my hair, I sigh tiredly. For it seems the answers remain just outside my grasp.

I shake my head when my thoughts turn to the second big revelation of the weekend. That the B&B was Lillian Potter's dream just about did me in last night. The pieces of the puzzle that are Josephine Potter immediately fell into place, the force in which they did made me catch my breath as we all listened to her story about her mom. The day she came to the boatyard and first brought up the idea of running a B&B, she didn't say anything about her mom. Not one word. Why? Why didn't she tell me? She should have. What if this had been a huge disaster? How would I have known the significance of this venture? No wonder she's been so stressed out recently. There is so much riding on its success. I can't let her down.

I blink when the lights of Capeside's retail district, such as it is, come into view. Pulling over into one of the many vacant spots in front of Molly's, I kill the engine and make my way inside. The clacking of the cart along the polished tile floor sounds particularly noisy in the quiet store. I lean on the cart's handle while I push it along and consult the list Bessie shoved at me before I left. I smile. Looks like now that Bodie's home the menu is getting kicked up a notch - at least for a few days. Excellent!

Mission accomplished at the market, I drop the groceries in the back of the truck and start off on foot to look for Henry. I find him at the Ale House where I've seen plenty of Sam Adams but no ale. He's happy to help out and promises to come by tomorrow so I leave him to his beer and his buddies and head back to the B&B.

By now the streets are shrouded in darkness. Clouds chase the sky, skittering across the full moon; considering the comedy of errors that was this weekend, I should have guessed.

The truck could probably make its way home on autopilot and my mind wanders again. It occurs to me - not for the first time - that Dawson is a douchebag. Even his compliments are couched in condescension. Something about his gratitude rubs me the wrong way. As if I would only be there for Joey because he asked me to! Who does he think has _been_ there for her these past months? And even though I glibly offered a return to our regularly scheduled programming, I've gotten used to that Potter girl. I'm not sure I want things to go back to the way they were last year between us. We can be friends with or without Dawson's interference or permission.

Sliding out of the truck, I catch drift of Alexander's giggles from the direction of the dock. Squinting, I make out brightly-colored human bundles over there watching the stars. None of the bundles are a Joey shape so I head to the house to find her.

There is only flickering light from the front room as I push open the door. Anxious to tell her the news about the furnace, I holler Joey's name. Getting no answer I poke my head in the next room, which is dark and empty.

It isn't until I turn around that I catch sight of her curled up on the couch. It's obvious she's exhausted and has succumbed to the heat from the fireplace - still it's kinda cute that she's fallen asleep in what used to be her old bed. This thought in mind, my lips lift on their own accord at the innocent sight and even though I'm still cold from the outside, warmth spreads throughout my body.

Her perfect features glow in the firelight; thick lashes lay on her cheek. I can't take my eyes off her as I make my way over to the couch. All I see is her; the rest of the room seems to fade away.

And, just like that, I _know_.

A virtual bevy of butterflies takes flight in my gut, their movement almost dance-like in their happiness to be finally free. The only sound I hear as I move toward her is my pounding heart. I don't think I even realize my hand is trembling as I slowly crouch next to her and gently pull the blanket up over her slender form.

I shift back slightly and take a moment to look at her up close. Then, as I get to my feet, I drop my head in surrender - because I know there's no stopping it now. The floodgate has opened. Every fiber of my being is alive with new feelings.

And what I feel is pure awe.

A wave of utter tenderness for this girl - this beautiful, opinionated, intelligent, loyal, annoying, passionate, stubborn, brave, complicated girl - washes over me.

_So damn beautiful…_

_So smart…_

_So strong…_

I can hardly breathe at the sudden comprehension of why the hell I care so much. It's so obvious now.

_So beautiful…_

I sink into the rocker across from her, stunned. In an effort to steady myself, I prop my chin on my hand. It's useless though as coherent thought eludes me. I watch her slumber, my head a jumble of memories.

_…leaning against my shoulder as her tears saturate my shirt… a snail hunt… a partner in crime… eluding receptionists and security guards… a red blanket and rearview mirror… cutting school together… a carnival… building the True Love… pulling her from a burning building… believing I didn't steal that test… commiserating as targets of gossip… feeling her in my arms as we danced… the heat of her eyes when she glares at mine… the rush of bantering with her… the tip of her tongue peeking when she smiles that smile…_

So damn beautiful…

All those twinges, the stomach upsets, the unsettled feelings; they all make sense now.

How could I have been so blind?

As I remain frozen in place, the gradual decrease in light within the room as the fire steadily burns lower is the only indicator that time has not stood still. My heart is full of Joey Potter, but it's not long before the inevitable happens and my brain starts to assert its usual wariness.

_What am I going to do now? What does this mean?_

My last attempt to kiss Miss Josephine, post-biology project, ended in rejection. Then, of course, as he is quick to remind me, I'm only holding Dawson's place for him. Throw college guy into the mix and I'm pretty sure I'm not even on Joey's romantic radar.

I take a deep, calming breath and fill my nostrils with the fragrant scent of hickory as it burns on the hearth. Lulled by her rhythmic breathing and the crackling of the fire, I slide lower in the rocker, determined to push those uneasy thoughts away for now.

Because tonight, I simply want to sit here and watch her to my heart's content. If tonight is all I'll ever have, then I'm taking it. Tonight is mine, and mine alone, to watch over her while she sleeps. I don't want anything to ruin that.

"_You know you love someone when you can spend the entire night  
just sitting by the fire, watching them sleep…"  
_

_Oh, Grams. How right you are. _

***~***

"Pacey?" Joey's sleepy, confused voice rasps as her eyes flutter open.

I clear my throat and answer her, my own voice gravelly from disuse. "Hey, Jo."

She rubs her eyes and yawns. "What are you doing?"

I flick a glance at the clock on the mantle. It's almost 3 a.m. "Nothing," I assure her quietly and sit up straight. "Um, why don't you go to bed? It's late. I need to bring the groceries in."

She nods at me as if that makes all the sense in the world and sits up, her eyes battling to stay open. I take in her pink cheeks and tousled halo of shining hair and it's all I can do to restrain myself from picking her up and carrying her safely to her room. In the dead of the night, in the face of a sleep-soft Joey, it seems I lack self-control.

Fortunately for me, she gathers the blanket around herself and gets up. I stand up with her and, as she passes me by, she unwraps herself and hands the blanket over. "Here, you'll need this more than me."

A gesture so natural it's instinctive I almost miss noticing it - she squeezes my hand. Then she pads toward her bedroom, bidding me a sleepy good-night on her way.

I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding as I watch her walk away from me, thankful she's too drowsy to ask coherent questions. It's obvious that Bessie isn't throwing me out since she'd already have done so by now, and it's too cold to ride my bike home. In this temperature, the groceries will keep fine in the car until morning.

Breakfast with the Potters again? I could do that. Because proximity _is_ a good thing.

Fatigue overrides any further thought this evening. I shrug off my coat and roll onto the couch. I stretch out leisurely in the warm space Joey vacated and tuck the blanket around me. I breathe in her lingering scent and drift off to sleep hoping to chase my dreams – oblivious to the smile still resident on my face.

***~***


	16. Food For Thought

**A/N:** Happy Friday! This week it's the **Northern Lights** epi and we have a couple of missing scenes for your enjoyment. [WRT Part 1, as much as we'd like to write a scene with Jen slapping Joey and telling her to wake up and smell the Pacey, we can't do that quite yet LOL!] As usual, thanks so much for your support and comments.

*~*** Food For Thought ***~*

**I.**

"So? Henry Parker." I put it out there – a question as a statement, an invitation to share - as we walked through the cold sunshine, mittened and scarved. I tried not to smirk as I figured Jen had been humiliated enough by Henry's antics at the after party. I had intimate knowledge of such humiliation but my empathy couldn't help but be layered with the urge to laugh.

Jen rolled her eyes a little but a small smile played at the corner of her lips. "He definitely wears his heart on his sleeve."

"Evidently," I stated dryly. "What about _your_ heart? Firmly under lock and key?"

Jen shrugged, clearly uncomfortable. "Let's just say that Henry has some endearing qualities that bear further exploration."

We ambled through the frozen leaves that had fallen too late for cleanup. There hadn't been any snow yet but I could smell it in the air. Jen and I had found ourselves leaving Capeside High at the same moment and fallen into step together toward home.

Personally, I couldn't see Henry's charms but all things considered, didn't feel qualified to judge.

Jen continued, her commentary becoming an oration. "It's difficult to dismiss the conditioning of peer pressure to stay within or above your own class level when faced with romantic choices. And yet if this was ten years down the road it wouldn't matter one bit. How can I, who personify rebellion, choose only rebellions that are deemed to be 'cool' by the very demographic against which I rebel?"

Fist pumping, I exclaimed, "Power to the wild child! Be at peace with your mission to revolutionize the world one freshman at a time then." I laughed lightly to show my solidarity.

Jen laughed, too, and then demanded quid pro quo. "And what about you, Joey? Hot date with a _college _freshman? Didn't think you had it in you."

"Why, whatever do you mean, Jen?" I said tossing my head in the manner of a femme fatale from somelame ass old movie Dawson forced me to watch. "Don't you know that men just fall at my feet, begging for the opportunity to guide me in the halls of higher learning?"

Jen's smile, a cross between pained and mysterious, flitted across her rosy-cheeked face. "You have no idea the power you wield. Wield wisely, my friend."

I nodded my head sagely as if I had the slightest idea what she was talking about. I certainly didn't feel as if I had any power in any of my relationships. Let's face it; I've bolted at every boy's kiss but Dawson's - beginning with Anderson Crawford and most recently with A.J. Moller. I was nothing if not predictable.

Despite my propensity for privacy, I was curious. "What did you think of A.J.?" I asked nonchalantly.

Of course, I didn't fool Jen for one second. "In the one point five minutes that I had to exchange pleasantries, I have only an opinion based on his appearance. And somehow, that's not what I think you're asking. The more important question, Joey, is what do you think of him?"

A question to which I wished I had the answer. I thought A.J. was cute in an adorably nerdy, academic way. He seemed so worldly, so mature. As much as I wanted to explore new possibilities with him, I didn't understand how I could possibly hold his interest.

"He's incredibly smart. He knows about literature, mythology, history, architecture, astronomy, he speaks three-"

Jen interrupted me, "I get it, I get it. He's smart. Obviously, you like that about a boy."

"Actually, it makes me feel…" I stumbled, not wanting to admit how out of my element I truly felt around him.

"Inadequate? Lacking? Deficient? Kinda stupid?" Jen helpfully supplied.

I smirked at her and just said, "Kinda."

"Joey, Joey, Joey. You're not supposed to be _discoursing_ with the boy. You're supposed to be _intercoursing_ with the boy."

"Jen!" My mouth hung open, flabbergasted.

She ignored me and went on, "Not literally, of course, but if you're going to spread your wings and fly…" She trailed off with a knowing nod. "So did you?"

"Did I what?" Now I was suspicious as to exactly what spreading my wings and flying meant in the Jennifer Lindley lexicon.

"Kiss him, of course! What did you think I meant? Honestly, Joey, is your mind always in the gutter?" Jen bumped my shoulder as she teased.

I didn't have to answer as my red cheeks told the tale and Jen clapped her mittens together in delight.

"Thank God!"

"For what?!" I wondered.

"That you're branching out of the Capeside circle. Breaking the Capeside curse, as it were."

"Well, don't get too excited, Jen," I retorted dryly. "There is no small number of significant impediments to dating a boy who lives an hour away."

Jen waved her hand at me airily. "Minor details. He knows how to drive, doesn't he? _My_ freshman doesn't even have his license yet. And wonder of wonders is that new-fangled invention you can use to actually talk to someone as far away as Boston! You've heard of telephones, I assume. This is excellent news!"

Her enthusiasm was contagious. It was possible, I suppose, to engage in some kind of social interaction with A.J. even if he did live in Boston. Dare I hope? "Well, I wouldn't mind it if he called me again," I admitted.

"That's the spirit! So spill, fellow rebel, what do your boys have to say about this new development?"

I crinkled my brow in confusion. "_My_ boys?"

"Dawson. Pacey." she spoke slowly as if I was indeed stupid.

I rolled my eyes. "If either of them had anything to say about it, and they most certainly do not, why in the world would they care?"

"C'mon, Joey. You can't be that dense. The three of you barely take a breath without checking in with the other two. You don't think they have an opinion about the girl they deem _theirs_ by right of history and sheer length of relationship, going out with a _college guy_?"

I thought back to my après-date visitor with whom I shared the sight of the northern lights and wondered if it was his twisted passive-aggressive way of keeping me hooked despite his protestations to the contrary. There was no denying that a little lost Dawson in need tugged at my heart strings and gave me purpose.

At least, Pacey, in his goofy, over-protective way was clearly concerned for the Potter honor, as misguided as it was.

I dismissed Jen's theory. "Dawson's hardly one to talk. _He_ lambasted _me_ for expressing concern over his penchant for distraction by every set of new breasts that show up in Capeside." I paused and glanced sideways at my companion, hurrying to offer, "No offense intended."

"None taken," Jen replied promptly. "Bygones."

Although I was still at a loss as to her thought process as far as sex pacts were concerned, I smiled then, glad we had become friends.

I continued, "Dawson and I have been… hanging out sometimes. As for Pacey, well… he's just Pacey. We're barely friends."

Jen stopped in her tracks then and turned to look at me incredulously. "Barely friends? Seriously?"

Grudgingly I admitted, "Well, I haven't wanted to kill him in his sleep for quite some time." I raised my eyebrows and gave her a little shove to get her moving again. It was too cold to stop for long. "Better?"

It was Jen's turn to roll her eyes. "Marginally. Since we're talking about the boy who helped you get the B&B up and running _and_ continues to work his ass off over there."

My face softened into a smile, remembering how often Pacey had come to the rescue lately. "He _has_ been kinda useful recently. Although he has this obsessive notion that A.J. is after only one thing."

Jen smiled knowingly as we walked up her driveway. "Well, you know, the average teenage boy thinks about sex every 6-8 minutes. Maybe he's projecting."

"Ewwww, Jen. Pul-eeeeze. That's just too disturbing for me to even think about."

Jen stood at the bottom of the steps, laughing. "Wanna come in? I'm sure Grams has some kind of baked goodies."

I stood for a moment, debating. Homework or cookies? Well, one cookie wouldn't keep me out of college, would it? And a little more girl talk, though out of character for me, couldn't hurt. I didn't think Jen had all the answers or that they would somehow even turn out to be _my_ answers. I wasn't even sure I would ask her the questions but I followed her into the vanilla-scented warmth, content for the moment to have a conversation with someone whose hormone profile didn't primarily consist of testosterone.

*~*

**II.**

"Hey, Bodie!" Pacey popped through the kitchen door to see Bessie's other half peering intently at a recipe card taped to the front of the cabinet.

"Hi, Pacey," Bodie acknowledged, his attention turning to the array of bowls, utensils and ingredients spread on the counter before him.

"Joey around?" Pacey asked, stretching his neck to try and see into the next room.

Bodie didn't answer but began to mound flour into a measuring cup and then level it off with the flat side of a spatula. Pacey bounced a little impatiently and then started off across the kitchen to look for her himself. Bodie's voice stopped him. "She's not here."

Pacey let out a deflated breath. "Where is she?"

"Couldn't say."

"When will she be back?"

"No idea."

Pacey frowned; visions of what's-his-name sweeping Joey off to a warm weekend getaway somewhere along the coast suddenly flooded his mind. That guy… that smooth-talking, ivy-league-walking, _college guy_… Pacey's thoughts were riddled with derision. He wouldn't put it past Mr. Renaissance to fake some rare comet sighting this time (or anything else the Discovery channel was showing these days) solely to get another chance alone with Joey and the night sky. He was certain this guy had no honorable intentions toward Joey or her pantalonies. In any language, dead or alive.

Bodie's addition of chocolate to the bowl caught his attention and he leaned in for a closer look, attempting to dip his finger to taste. "Hey, whatcha makin'?"

Bodie swiftly picked up the bowl, moving it out of Pacey's reach, and began to vigorously beat its contents with a wooden spoon. While resting his hip against the opposite counter, he finally looked at the boy who was apparently on a mission today. "New brownie recipe. Hang around, you can taste test 'em for me."

"Well, why didn't you say so sooner?" Pacey let his brown corduroy coat slip off his shoulders and slung it on the back of the nearest chair. "At your service," he said with a grin and sat down. Watching as Bodie moved around the kitchen, Pacey tapped his palms on the counter to a tuneless beat. "When will they be ready?"

Bodie's straight, white teeth flashed in a return grin over his shoulder. "Gotta bake 'em first." He scraped the batter into a prepared pan, talking as he worked. "Saw the show. You did a great job."

"Yeah? Thanks. I thought I saw you and Bessie afterwards but you were gone before I changed."

Bodie nodded. "Babysitter on the clock. Our regular, free live-in help had other plans." He winked at Pacey.

Pacey's cheeks colored slightly and he dipped his head. Spotting an unused spoon on the counter, he reached for it, twirling it between his fingers. Joey had made good on her promise to come on Saturday night. Her presence front-row-center had motivated him to pull out all the stops on stage resulting in not one, but _two_ standing ovations, thankyouverymuch. His good mood plummeted, however, when he lost sight of her in the crowd afterwards and he was left to try to quell the rising disappointment that she'd gone without even a word of congratulations. But this disappointment soared into unfettered excitement when he found her waiting patiently for him in the hall outside the backstage.

She looked just as incredible as she had the night before for her (he mentally spit out the word) _date - _even though he knew she hadn't dressed up just for him.

_"Pacey! You were wonderful!" Joey exclaimed, smacking him on the shoulder with her rolled up program. "I knew you could do it."_

"Thanks, Potter."_ A blush crept across Pacey's cheeks.__ "Couldn't have done it without you."_

"Oh, you would have been fine. Seriously, you were a natural up there."

Pacey shrugged, squirming a bit from the oh-so-infrequent, unabashed praise. He clapped his hands together and pointed at her. "All I know is, without your help I would have drawn a complete blank and adlibbed those obscenities. So whattaya say we go get a pizza to show my appreciation?"

"Sure. It's your night, Pace. Whatever you want to do," Joey answered easily.

So they had gone for pizza. The quantity of butterflies in his stomach - now ever present when she was near - prevented Pacey from eating as much as usual; instead he took the opportunity to drink in the sight of her. Chocolate tresses framing her face in soft waves; hazel eyes twinkling with the laughter that came so easily between them. And, of course, those very berry lips issuing opinions, retorts and commentary on every subject.

He'd been mesmerized.

"Pacey?" Bodie's voice interrupted his trip down memory lane.

He glanced up to see Bodie's hands wrist deep in dishwater and the oven timer steadily blinking the brownie countdown. Pacey dropped the spoon and sat up straight. "Yeah… sorry. Need a hand?"

"Nah, I got it, thanks." Bodie placed the last bowl to dry on the dish rack and grabbed a cloth to wipe his hands. "You know, I'm headed back out tomorrow."

"Yeah? Already?"

"Duty calls."

"Man, it must be rough." Pacey shook his head. "All those nights away."

Bodie shrugged. "Won't be forever. One day I hope to have my own place closer by and it won't be so bad."

"Still, the long hours…"

"Not tempted to try a career in the restaurant business I take it?"

Pacey chuckled. "Right, because the paying public would travel hundreds of miles just to try my one-of-a-kind canned cranberry sauce."

Bodie grinned back, laughing along with him. He threw the dish cloth to one side and cleared his throat. Looking Pacey dead in the eye, he turned serious. "I hope you know I'm counting on you, Pacey. To take care of my girls for me while I'm away."

Pacey's voice raised an octave. "Me?" He opened his eyes wide. "Shouldn't you be askin' _Dawson_?"

It was Bodie's turn to shake his head. "I know who's responsible for getting the B&B opened successfully and it certainly isn't Dawson." He held the younger man's gaze. "There's no one else I'd trust, Pacey."

Pacey shuffled a little in his seat, uncomfortable with Bodie's confidence, and tried to make a joke. "Need me to take Alex under my wing, too? He's old enough to drink alcohol now, right?"

Bodie rolled his eyes, a trait he'd obviously picked up from his many years with the Potters, deliberately ignoring Pacey's second question. "Somehow I think you'll have your work cut out just looking after the girls. Bessie has Alex covered. But, hey, if you want to lend a hand in changing diapers or-"

Pacey gave a small wave of his hand cutting him off and smirked. "You know what? That's okay."

"So, how about it, Pacey? Can I count on you?"

Pacey's eyes slid away, as though afraid Bodie might read some secret there. He bit his lip briefly and then turned back to him with resolve. "Like you even have to ask, Bodie." He smiled. "I'm here."

The oven timer dinged in perfect sync with the opening of the kitchen door. A rush of cold air blew in with a flurry of activity as Bessie, Joey and Alexander tumbled through the doorway. Palpable relief flooded Pacey as he realized Joey was safe from the clutches of college guy.

When she saw Pacey sitting by the counter, Joey smiled brightly. He knew he was probably grinning like an idiot; a fact that was confirmed when he caught Bodie giving him a knowing smile. Pacey quickly rearranged his face and jumped from his seat to take Alexander from Bessie as she struggled with her coat.

As Bodie removed the baking tray from the oven, the smell of warm chocolate permeated the room. Bessie and Joey gathered around the table, mouths watering. Pacey subtly pushed his way to stand next to Joey's side, under the pretense of guarding his position as the chief taste-tester. But the real reason was a lot simpler - he cherished another opportunity at Potter proximity.

*~*


	17. Driving Force

A/N: It's update time! This week's episode is **Valentine Day's Massacre**, and we have a collection of missing scenes from both Pacey's and Joey's POV for you. And just for a little fun we've decided to include a song at the end which, in our opinion, fits perfectly with how Pacey is feeling right now. (Disclaimer – we don't own the lyrics or the song.)

Thanks so much for your continuing support and comments. We always love reading your feedback and it truly does inspire and keep us going. So, please, don't stop ;) Shout out to **sweetserenity4 a**nd **Seersha** for taking the time to leave feedback last week, and **writingflirt** for the story alert.

************ Driving Force ************

"_Love is the __driving__ force of all hearts, whereupon one can spend a lifetime  
learning to avoid the bumps and road blocks. __Sometimes you can cruise along in the fast lane;  
other times, it's best to leave the handbrake on. Navigate correctly and  
it will be the best, most rewarding journey of your life."  
_~ Anonymous

Hoping to walk Joey to school, Pacey's habit of dropping by in the mornings (under the guise of seeing whether there were any maintenance emergencies), had netted him not one but _two_ unpleasant surprises that morning – neither concerning broken appliances.

Pushing the door open after a perfunctory knock, he called out for either sister receiving no response. Just as he opened his mouth to shout louder, he heard a sound coming from the living room and made a beeline in that direction. Turning the corner, Pacey stopped dead in his tracks. With a frown he beheld one smiling Joey Potter seated at the telephone desk, head bowed, a pretty pink bloom spread across her cheeks. In her hand she held the official Potter Bed and Breakfast reservation pen and was using it to doodle idly on the desk pad.

His frown grew at the sight and he flattened his lips. He just _knew_ she was talking to college guy. Darkness clouded his thoughts as he raged against the injustice and irony of this guy's appearance in Joey's life just as he himself realized how he felt about her.

How could he compete with somebody like him?

On the most superficial level, he could never keep Joey interested intellectually; while evidently college guy could wax poetic on _every_ topic, about which no one cared. Then, of course, there was the guy's career path, which looked much more promising than anything Pacey had in mind at the moment - since he was actually _in_ college. Video sales and handyman didn't bode well for a successful resume.

He strained to hear, yet her voice was nothing but a low murmur; her face portrayed a mixture of emotions, ending with a smile. He stood stock still until he heard her say, "_Me, too. Talk to you soon."_ before hanging up the phone.

Pacey wondered to what exactly she was responding "me, too", trying hard not to assume the worst. He shuffled his feet as if just arriving on the scene and let out a somewhat too hearty, "Hey, Potter!"

Dropping the pen she still held in her hand, Joey jumped a little and gasped, "Witter, _what_ are you doing?"

Pacey arched an eyebrow at her. "What are _you_ doing?"

"Nothing! Don't sneak up on me!" Shaking her finger at him, Joey stood up.

"You hiding somethin'? 'Cause I just walked right in here and said hello – no sneaking, at all. But let's face it; it's a well-established fact that you Miss Potter are a skittish kitten." Crossing his arms, he tilted his head at her and waited for her denial.

Joey narrowed her eyes and ignored his gibe. "What do you want, Pacey?"

"Must I remind you every time, Potter?" He sighed dramatically.

From the look on her face, it appeared he did.

"Well, you see… I'm the handyman," he said very slowly. "I fix things." Chuckling at her unbroken scowl he continued in a normal voice, "I just stopped by to make sure everything here is ship-shape. That there haven't been any major - or minor, for that matter - maintenance emergencies that require my skill and expertise."

Rolling her eyes, Joey smirked. "Nope. Made it through the last 24 hours without even a burnt out light bulb." She brushed past him, heading toward the kitchen.

"Excellent. Ya know," he exclaimed, walking closely behind her, "if you changed your mind about what we discussed the other day, it'd help you remember my role here."

Joey looked at him over one shoulder. "Pacey, for the last time. We are _not_ making you a Hawaiian print t-shirt with the slogan 'Potter's handyman - happy to service all your needs' written on it."

"Kill-joy."

He fumbled for an excuse to keep her further engaged. "So… you, er, you wanna go over that, um, trig homework before heading to school?"

"Completely aside from the fact that I can't begin to fathom your sudden interest in homework or your willingness to go to school… no," she said emphatically.

In the process of sliding his coat off, Pacey stopped, his arms still encased in the sleeves. "_No_? Why?"

"Can't."

"Why?"

"No time."

"Why?"

Joey spun around to face him. "We've been over this, Pace. Contrary to popular belief, you're not two. What's with all the "why" questions? Read my lips - I can't. I'm busy."

"With what?"

The Potter eye roll made another appearance as Joey became exasperated. "If you must know, Dawson is coming over to teach me to drive. He'll be here any minute now."

"Dawson?" Pacey's voice raised an octave in disbelief. "Dawson Leery, who can't even drive a speedboat? Oh wait, I forgot! Extenuating circumstances in that particular mishap."

"Thanks for that reminder, Pace." She sighed and explained, "Look, he offered and, considering Bessie has categorically refused me further tutelage based on our last fiasco, I accepted. Besides, Dawson needs something to do right now to keep his mind off the aimlessness of his career path." She searched his eyes. "What's the big deal?"

Forgetting that his arms were bound by his sleeves, Pacey attempted to raise his hands in peace and only succeeded in flapping his arms like a puppet gone haywire. He saw that Joey was reaching for her coat and shrugged his own back onto his shoulders.

He stepped quickly, following her out the door as she exited the house to wait on the porch steps for Dawson. "No big deal at all." He lifted his shoulders. "But I better supervise since I have more driving experience than the two of you combined. Wouldn't wanna wreck the only set of wheels the Potter family owns, right?"

"Whatever, Pacey. I'm sure Dawson is perfectly capable of teaching me how to drive without your supervision but suit yourself if you wanna hang around." She shrugged and added in a softer voice, "Anyway, he could use all the friends he's got right now."

Pacey glanced at her out of the corner of his eye as they sat on the steps. First, the phone call with college guy and now this? Great. Just how far down was his place on the Potter priority list? And Dawson needed _all_ his friends? Please. More like he was fishing for some one-on-one time with a particular "friend".

His knee bounced and he chewed the inside of his cheek as he contemplated. What Dawson really needed, for his own good, was a distraction that didn't come with doe eyes and silky brown locks. But where could he find Dawson a new diversion, one that would keep him busy enough to put Miss Potter on the back burner again as he was wont to do?

He mentally flipped through his social rolodex. Ahhhh… he knew just the thing! Matt Caulfield's Anti-Valentine's Day Party! He rubbed his hands together and jumped up as Dawson came across the yard.

"Hey, D!" Pacey haled his best friend.

Now, to put his plan into action!

**********

"Stupid, damn clutch," Joey swore under her breath as she stalled the cart, again. Thanks to Murphy's Law, Capeside Golf Course had to be the one club in the world whose golf carts actually _had_ clutches. Sighing heavily, she turned the ignition and restarted the engine, slowly easing off the clutch and guiding the vehicle forward. Gradually, she built up as much speed as she could in first gear, and headed once more in the direction of Doug's golf cart.

When she hit an unexpected bump in the grass, almost stalling yet again, she cursed Andie's name. This was all Andie's fault; she'd deserted Joey. After Doug had stopped them, he'd insisted they follow him back in his cart to the club house, not trusting them to return their cart safely on their own. Andie, fretting about the impact an arrest record would have on her college applications, had jumped into Doug's cart with the hope of sweet-talking him to not press charges. Or knowing Andie, more like _chattering_ him into submission.

Joey had been fine driving when Andie was with her, for she'd been too distracted by venting about Pacey to worry about gears, clutches and all that nonsense; the driving had come naturally to her. Yet now, not so much. She was beginning to wonder if she'd ever learn how to drive without stalling.

She hit another bump and swore again when she had to readjust her hat after it slipped down her forehead.

But it wasn't only the driving that was bothering her. She was still very much irritated with Mr. Village Idiot. He'd been on rare form tonight. She felt completely justified in being annoyed with him.

And Andie thought Joey reminded her of herself right before she started dating him?! Joey mentally rolled her eyes at that inference. Maybe instead of imagining things, Andie should open her own eyes and see what was right in front of her – that the fact that she was so quick to draw similarities to her past relationship with Pacey proved Pacey wasn't far from her mind; that Andie still wasn't over him.

Another bump, another curse.

Pacey. Maybe she should be cursing _his_ name and not Andie's. What was with him tonight? Surely, he had to see that she was really worried about Dawson? That he needed his friends right now to guide him.

She sighed once more. Or possibly Pacey _didn't_ see that. Perhaps his eagerness to let loose tonight was based on a need to forget about all the things he'd been through this year. Sure, he had the _True Love_ and she knew _that_ brought him joy, but she had no idea if he was still hurting over Andie since he never said a thing about it. Instinct told her that he wasn't but she couldn't be certain.

Judging from the amount of time he was spending over at the B&B and the quantity of Bessie's hamburgers he'd ingested, she wondered if it was possible that things at his house were worse than ever. Maybe Sheriff Witter was drinking more? It was another thing he never talked about.

She frowned as she realized something. Pacey didn't appear to have anyone to look out for him, except himself.

Pulling her cart to a stop behind Doug's in the club's parking lot, Joey removed the keys. She remained seated, fiddling with the key ring, deep in thought.

Then she smiled as she made a decision.

Neither boy would be alone.

She'd be there for them both.

**********

Despite the early morning hour, Pacey stirred under the filtered light warming the glass block window high in the cell wall. Foggy with sleep, his thoughts seemed stuck on the phrase: _the best laid plans_ - repeating in a continuous loop. Suddenly, his eyelids shot open in remembrance. He wasn't absolutely sure how the rest of that quote went but he knew its essential meaning was that those plans got screwed up.

Oh God.

What he'd said to Joey… a long rambling discourse ending with, _the reverence that you treat this little saga of yours with is enough to make a guy puke, _afterwhich he'd proceeded to provide the full special effects, complete with audio.

Wonderful.

And almost as bad, what he'd admitted to Dougie. That the girl who had driven him to drink last night was _actually the kind of pretty that gives you butterflies._

None of that was part of the plan.

Fuck.

Groaning, Pacey swung his legs over the edge of the thin mattress, the metal-framed springs creaking and bending under the movement. Perched on the edge of the cot, he scrubbed his hands over his face and through his unruly brown hair, leaving it to stick up in spikes and tufts. Thanks to Doug's insistence on copious amounts of water after that initial cup of coffee and two aspirins, he only had a slight nagging headache but his mouth tasted like... well… puke.

He heard footsteps approaching in the hallway and then the sound of Doug's cheery voice, which seemed to bounce and echo off the concrete walls of the cell. "Rise and shine, little brother."

His keys jangled loudly as he unlocked the door and it swung open. He held out a steaming paper cup to his brother. "You ready to head out of here?"

Pacey stood, bracing himself against his knees, the cot letting out one more mighty creak as it gave up its occupant. Grabbing his coat from the bench where he'd thrown it, he took the cup from Doug with a grateful look. He drained it in only a few mouthfuls then followed his brother without a word, tossing the cup in the trash on the way.

When they reached the sidewalk outside the station, Pacey mumbled, "See ya, Dougie" and started off in the direction of the boatyard.

"Hey, Pacey?" Doug called after him.

Pacey paused and turned, squinting at the neat, crisp figure now standing by his cruiser. "Yeah?"

"Need a ride somewhere?"

Pacey hesitated, unwilling to face the Witter household quite yet. "How pissed is Pop?"

Doug grinned. "He probably doesn't even remember last night. But I wasn't suggesting you go home." He winked. "I'd be happy to drop you… somewhere."

Pacey shared a look with his brother and briefly considered his offer. He figured that the least he owed Joey was an apology, and the sooner that was offered the better. Whether he spilled his guts about the way he felt would depend entirely on the level of his courage by the time he got there.

He shrugged. "Yeah, okay. Thanks. Er, you got any gum?"

"I can do better than that. Why don't we stop at my place and you can get cleaned up?"

Thirty minutes later, his breath minty fresh, Pacey stood at the end of the Potter driveway as the cruiser disappeared back the way it had come.

Thankfully, Doug had refrained from offering any further opinions and had not subjected him to the satanic racket of Mariah or Celine. It was bad enough his brother had known to head to the Potter B&B without prompting. Pacey wondered what he'd said last night that made it so obvious to Deputy Doug. If he'd had to listen to advice, no matter how well-intentioned, on top of that - well, it wouldn't have been good. In lieu of conversation, Pacey had spent the ride gazing at the passing scenery, running through possible scenarios in his head of opening lines.

_Hey Potter, sorry about last night and, oh by the way, I'm in love with you._

Joey! How's it going? Didn't mean all that stuff I said last night but I do mean this: I'm in love with you.

Joey, last night really sucked. It sucked up one side and down the other. Sorry. But before you kill me, I need to say something. Let me put it really simply. I'm in love with you.

Hi Jo, I wanted to apologize and I really, really need to tell you how I feel about you; I'm in love with you.

Morning, Jo. Nice day isn't it? Look, about the way I behaved last night. I'm sorry. I was wrong. But if you'll hear me out, you'll understand why I acted the way I did. It wasn't just that I was drunk. You see, the thing is… I've been meaning to tell you this… I'm in love with you.

Like a thousand times before, he walked toward that familiar red door; the one he had actually helped hang and paint. Muttering to himself, he debated and rehearsed dialogue; the words becoming dyslexic in his anxious brain. Panicked, and in need of just a few more moments to compose himself, he veered away from the house and ventured toward the safety of the dock.

The water moved lazily around the bend, reflecting the bright blue sky of the clear winter day. Taking a deep breath to calm his frazzled nerves, he stood for a moment in the place where the year had begun. The place where comfort had been offered and taken and the possibility of friendship had been predicted.

For him, that tentative beginning had grown into something more, something special and precious. And now he wanted, no… _needed_ to express that to Joey. He had to take his shot, put it out there, tell her the truth or just as Doug declared, he would spend the rest of his life in his own personal prison.

Resolved, he set off across the yard and this time actually came to stand in front of the door where he raised his gloved hand and knocked.

**********

"I still can't believe I did it!" Joey exclaimed happily, eyes coruscating. "I made it to third gear!"

"You did good, Potter. Real good." Pacey's blue eyes scanned her face and smiled softly at what he saw. "Once you got goin', you were a real natural."

Standing in the doorway of the Potter B&B, hands deep in his pockets, he cleared his throat. With a twist of his hips and one shoulder, he pointed behind him. "Well, I should go. Gotta face Pops sometime."

Joey walked with him out the door and stood on the porch near the railing, the chill of the mid-morning air causing her to subconsciously pull her dressing gown cord tight around her waist. "Think he'll still be mad?"

Pacey smirked. "With me, it's more like when _isn't_ he mad, ya know?"

Joey gave him an understanding look and nodded.

"See ya, Potter." He jogged down the steps, taking two at a time, and began walking in the direction of the road.

Swiveling around to watch him, Joey leaned against the railing and called out his name. He turned at her voice and raised his brows in inquiry.

"Don't tell Dawson this, but you're a much better driving instructor."

He dipped his head briefly then gave her his most charming smile. "Was there ever any doubt?"

She rolled her eyes and smiled reluctantly.

"All part of the handyman service, Potter. Never let it be said that Pacey J. Witter isn't happy to service _all_ your needs." He waggled his eyebrows. "Oh, and I think for our future driving lessons you should continue to wear those PJs."

Joey's eyes instantly dropped to her outfit, only now remembering she'd been dressed in her PJs all this time. She blushed, managing to pull off a glare and look embarrassed all at the same time. "You wish."

Pacey didn't answer her, simply chuckled and recommenced walking.

Joey continued to watch long after she couldn't see him anymore. She placed her elbows on the railing and rested her chin on one upturned hand. Shaking her head, she eventually gave into a smile, seeing the humor in the situation. Of course Pacey would be the one to see her in the novelty PJs Bessie had given her last Christmas. Of all the people to see her like this, it had to be him.

Much like right at the beginning of the school year, when he'd joined her at the end of her dock and she'd been crying, or even when she'd been soaked after the infamous snail debacle, he always seemed to catch her at the times when she either looked her worst or most vulnerable.

Her eyes tracked the course of a cardinal as it flew overhead. She was glad that she and Pacey had resolved things from last night, even if she still wasn't completely sure what had set him off. She mentally shrugged. At least now, she could keep that promise to herself to look out for him. At one point last night, locked in that cell, she'd almost changed her mind.

She smiled her trademark smile. The boy challenged her, that's for sure.

Shaking her head this time to clear her thoughts, she pushed back from the railing and turned to go inside the house to get properly dressed, her smile still firmly in place.

**********

Long after the sun had set, Pacey lay in his bed, arms tucked behind his head as he stared unseeing at the ceiling. Another plan – definitely not the best laid one - had gone awry.

Standing in front of her this morning, seeing the look in her eyes as she waited patiently for him to vocalize his feelings – he'd known.

The timing hadn't been right.

More important than his burning need to tell her was her ability to hear his confession right now. He sensed that she wouldn't understand the depth or sincerity of his feelings; she wouldn't have been receptive.

And he wasn't quite willing to face outright rejection just yet.

Way back when, when he'd kissed her right after the carnival, she'd been thinking of someone else. Sadly, nothing had changed. If he admitted his feelings now, she'd still be thinking of someone else - maybe _two_ someone elses.

Whenever and however he told her what was in his heart, he wanted her to be thinking only of him.

Still, it had been a good day. A very good day, in fact. For not only had Joey expressed concern for _him_ but the driving lesson had been a resounding success. Seeing that brilliant lop-sided smile as she mastered the gears and knowing he had some part in putting it on that beautiful face… well, that was enough for today.

She was worth the wait.

**********

**Colbie Cailat – Realize**

.com/watch?v=KdQA6mC3ZWI

Take time to realize  
That your warmth is  
Crashing down on me  
Take time to realize  
That I am on your side  
Well didn't I, didn't I tell you  
But I can't spell it out for you  
No it's never gonna be that simple  
No I can't spell it out for you

If you just realize  
What I just realized  
That we'd be perfect for each other  
And we'll never find another  
Just realize  
What I just realized  
We'd never have to wonder  
If we missed out on each other, now

Take time to realize  
Oh oh, I'm on your side  
Didn't I, didn't I tell you  
Take time to realize  
Oh oh, I'm on your side  
Oh ooo oh ooo oh  
But I can't spell it out for you  
No it's never gonna be that simple  
No I can't spell it out for you

If you just realize  
What I just realized  
That we'd be perfect for each other  
And we'll never find another  
Just realize  
What I just realized  
We'd never have to wonder  
If we missed out on each other, but

It's not the same  
No it's never the same  
If you don't feel it too  
If you meet me half way  
If you would meet me half way  
It could be the same for you

If you just realize  
What I just realized  
That we'd be perfect for each other  
And we'll never find another  
Just realize  
What I just realized  
We'd never have to wonder  
If we missed out on each other

Just realize  
What I just realized  
That we'd be perfect for each other  
And we'll never find another  
Just realize  
What I just realized  
We'd never have to wonder  
If we missed out on each other, now  
Missed out on each other now  
Missed out on each other now  
Missed out on each other now

**********


	18. Clean Slate

A/N: What better way to take the sting out of Friday the 13th than an update? :) This week we are looking at **Crime and Punishment**. Hopefully you have this episode fairly fresh in your minds as the missing scenes weave throughout it. Similar to last week's ficlet, we included a song at the end which we thought fitted well to how Pacey is feeling – as usual we don't ownthe song or the lyrics.

We always love to hear your thoughts and comments, so please don't be shy. Special thanks to the **LaLe LiLa** for the story alert.

************Clean Slate************

His brow furrowed, Pacey slowly made his way back down the driveway of the Potter Bed and Breakfast. This was the third day this week he had stopped by to see if everything was in smooth working order (or to walk Joey to school – whichever) that she hadn't been there.

It was just plain wrong to get up this early only to be thwarted in his quest.

Not that Potter wasn't worth losing a little sleep over, but losing a little sleep _and then_ not getting the chance to spend any time with her in the mornings? Now that was just a waste of good shut-eye.

Where _was_ she anyway? Pacey chewed on the inside of his cheek while he mulled over the possibilities.

Maybe she got another job?

A job that she went to only before school? Nah.

Maybe college guy was coming down from Boston in the mornings and taking her out to breakfast?

Cringing, Pacey pushed _that_ lovely thought away as soon as it slid through his consciousness, not even willing to entertain it.

Knowing Joey, it wouldn't surprise him one bit if she was ducking out every morning to study in the library.

But seriously, who gets up early to study? The thought was so foreign to him that he had to give it careful consideration before he dismissed it out of hand. He supposed that even if he couldn't relate, it didn't mean it couldn't be true.

One thing he knew for sure, he was going to track down Miss Josephine at some point today and solve the mystery of her early morning disappearances. How else was he supposed to plan his "unplanned" proximity to her?

Regardless, it was way too early to go to school, even to check and see if Joey was there. His stomach grumbled, reminding him that his plan of arriving at the Potter's with plenty of time to allow for the _breakfast_ part of Bed & Breakfast to take place hadn't exactly panned out well. He not only had some time on his hands but he was hungry.

So what choices did that leave him? Moving forward, because it was too cold to stand still for long, Pacey pondered his options.

Aha! The twenty-four hour diner also known as the Leery kitchen.

**********

Letting the screen door bang shut behind him, Pacey pushed open the front door and called out a greeting.

"In here," Dawson's voice floated from the general vicinity of the kitchen.

Passing a bare family room, Pacey did a double-take. "Hey! You guys have been robbed!" he said as he shed his coat and took a seat at the kitchen table.

Dawson glanced over his shoulder from his sentry post at the toaster. His brown-haired friend was already making himself at home by pouring a bowl of cereal from the selection on the table. "Just another development in the drawn-out drama of the Leery divorce." Dawson shook his head and sighed. "I suppose it's a good thing we don't have any pets."

Pacey laughed. "That'd be a big community property problem."

Bringing a plate of toast to the table, Dawson took a seat. "What are you doing out and about so early, Pacey?" He glanced up at the clock on the wall. "We have at least forty-five minutes until homeroom."

"Um… just stopped by the B&B to take care of something for Bessie," he said casually.

"They've been doing okay over there, haven't they?" Dawson asked.

Pacey shrugged. Mouth full of cereal, he mumbled, "Considering it's the off season, not too bad. They got some bookings over Valentine's Day."

"Ugh, don't remind me," Dawson shuddered. "Our foray onto the wild side has earned me indefinite indentured servitude to my mother."

"Yeah, wasn't our best night out, was it?" Pacey readily agreed. Not really willing to revisit the details of their night in the pokey, he swiftly changed the subject. "Your dad leave already?"

"Yeah, he's been opening the school every morning for the painters." He spread some jelly onto his toast and cut it in half.

"They're painting the school?" Pacey was surprised; he hadn't seen any evidence of it. Besides, they usually did that kind of stuff over the summer.

"Nuh-uh. Didn't Joey tell you? Principal Greene commissioned four students to paint murals symbolizing unity in the hallways."

"Why would Joey tell me that?" Pacey was confused by this entire line of conversation. He mentally berated himself for not remembering that a dose of Dawson this early in the morning was not good thing.

"Because _she's_ one of those four students, Pacey. She's been working on it before and after school all week."

"No shit? Well, that's great." He smiled softly to himself, aware of what it must have meant to Joey to be asked.

Then the light dawned as his brain kicked into gear and the puzzle pieces of Joey's early morning disappearances fell into place. He wondered if Dawson knew only because Mitch had told him or if he still headed Joey list of confidantes – he couldn't help but hope it was the former case.

Pacey pushed away from the table while Dawson was still rambling and, taking his bowl to the sink, interrupted, "Hey, I gotta go." He slapped him on the back. "I'll see ya later, man."

Dawson watched in surprise as his friend disappeared out the back door. Now what was _that_ all about? Shaking his head at the thought, knowing he'd probably never understand why Pacey acted the way he did, Dawson took another bite into his toast and finished his breakfast in peaceful solitude.

**********

_A baseball card? _

Joey shook her head in disgust and crossed her arms against her chest.

_A fricking baseball card?_

Oblivious to her surroundings she was on auto-pilot, heading home through the deserted streets of Capeside. With every step she took, the angrier she got and, as a result, the faster she walked.

She snorted to herself. To think that she had actually gone over to Doug's tonight worried about Pacey. Granted, that worry had turned into deep annoyance when she realized he could get himself suspended, or worse kicked out of school, over some misguided hero complex on her behalf.

Oh, how wrong she'd been.

He hadn't been concerned for _her_.

He'd done it only because he felt a duty to _Dawson_.

Dawson. His involvement in this whole wife swap arrangement didn't come as a surprise. If anything, she should have expected this of him; to script the scene and direct the cast - in the process ridding himself of any untoward guilt. For the problem (that is, _her_) would have been taken care of by a loyal babysitter.

No, what hurt the most – even more than them thinking she needed a babysitter in the first place - was the part Pacey had played. The knowledge that he'd actually agreed to look after her.

As a favor.

Out of an obligation.

Out of pity.

To know that all this time - when she'd naively thought that he'd been hanging out with her because he wanted to - he'd only done it because he _had_ to.

She'd actually let herself believe that they had gotten past the snipes in their banter and that they were building toward something bordering on... well, truth be told, she wasn't sure what - but she had liked to believe it was friendship.

Yet, to know that it had all been some scheme behind her back...

Joey hugged herself tighter as her thoughts darkened. She should have taken more notice of how good an actor Pacey was, that he could make her believe that he didn't actually mind hanging around her lately.

She laughed cruelly to herself. She should have asked Pacey how they did it - was it weekly check-in reports over at the Leery's, or did they discuss her in the boy's locker room after basketball practice?

God, she bet everyone at school knew; they probably had a good old laugh at her expense, "_oh look, there goes Joey Potter, can't get any friends unless they are bribed to hang out with her_."

Even in her highly agitated state, Joey knew she was overreacting, that she wasn't thinking logically right now.

But she couldn't help it.

_All this time... _

She began to slow her strides as a painful thought emerged.

It had all been based on a lie.

Every conversation, every word.

_...did any of it mean anything?_

She came to a complete stop and pressed a shaky palm to her forehead. All the anger inside her slowly evaporated, similar to the early morning mist when it's kissed by the dawning sun. Only instead of the warmth of the sunshine, all she felt in its place was a gaping void.

It felt like she'd lost something very important; something had slipped from her grasp, something she couldn't quite identify.

Her attention was drawn back to the present by the sensation of warm moisture running down her face. Shocked, she removed her hand from her forehead and placed her fingertips lightly against her cheeks.

She was crying.

Great, now she really _was_ overreacting. Why on earth would she be crying? She was supposed to be angry, not sad.

Right?

Confused by their cause but determined to stop them, she did the only thing she could. The thing that always worked for her. She raised her chin high in the air and let the rage rebuild inside her. Roughly swiping the tears away with her sleeve, she started walking - now even quicker than before.

She'd be angry, not sad.

Angry.

Angry because she didn't need his pity. She quickly shook her head, mentally correcting herself.

Angry because she didn't need _their_ pity.

**********

_Fuck!_

Pacey's legs fought over themselves as to which would be the first as he ran down the stoop of Doug's building. Swinging his corduroy coat behind his back, he quickly shoved his arms into the sleeves and jogged to the crossroads at the end of the street.

Only once he got there, he immediately skidded to a halt. His breath came out in short spurts as he tried to refill his lungs and calm his rapid heartbeat. Not knowing which direction to take, he turned in a circle on the spot and dragged his hand through his hair.

_Fuuuuck!_

He had no idea what he was going to do or where he was going. He just knew he had to make things right with Potter.

He'd waited a precious six minutes, frozen in the same spot on the couch, his mouth slightly open. He'd counted them, all 360 seconds. When it turned out that a) the cushions _weren't_ miraculously going to morph themselves into a black hole and graciously swallow him up, b) based on Doug's face he _had_ actually just said what he did out loud to Joey, and c) this _wasn't_ a nightmare and he was wide awake, he'd jumped up and rushed out the door.

_Damnit!_

Trust him to just come out and tell her the way he did. Joey sure knew how to call 'em - you want boneheaded moves? You come to him. Yep, Pacey Witter ladies and gentlemen, your local Capesidian; the man to call when you want sensitive information expressed gently to your loved ones.

_Damn. It!_

Pacey continued to drag his hand through his hair, disgusted with himself. And she'd been about to say something really important, too. He could tell. It had been on the tip of her tongue. She was going to say something about them, about him and her, and because of what he said and how he said it, she'd completely clammed up. He'd ruined it. The moment was gone; he'd completely and utterly ruined it.

God, he'd ruined everything.

His feet made a start in the direction of the B&B. He knew want he wanted to do. He wanted to find her straight away and clear things up, to make things OK.

But he knew he couldn't.

So, with difficulty, his head overruled his heart. Just like when Dawson had stopped him from following Joey after their argument about the defaced mural, telling Pacey to let her go and be by herself, he knew he should do the same now. Joey needed some time and space alone. The last thing she would want right now would be to see his face - even if hers was the only thing _he_ wanted to see.

Sighing, he dropped his shoulders and slowly started to walk back to Doug's. As he turned around, the lights from the hardware store across the street caught the corner of his eye. The lines in his forehead appeared and he bit the inside of his cheek as an idea formed.

Maybe there was something he could do.

He briefly tapped his back pocket to ensure he had his wallet; after checking the road was clear, he crossed the street and entered the store.

Five minutes later he exited. Safely in his hands was one newly purchased can of white paint.

**********

Joey stood in front of her open locker, using the excuse of tidying her papers to keep herself busy. As much as she tried to convince herself she didn't care, her thoughts continued to drift to the proceedings going on in that room. The one where the Disciplinary Committee was currently being held.

Or more importantly, what exactly Pacey's fate would be at the hand of Principal Greene.

Frustrated, Joey blew her hair from her eyes and focused on moving her papers from one shelf to the other, only to put them right back in their original place.

She didn't care.

She really didn't.

Nope, not one little bit.

Which was why, two minutes later, she was walking down the hall toward that room.

**********

"_Can you honestly doubt for a second that he doesn't truly care about you?"_

Joey sighed out loud. God, she hated it when Dawson made a valid point. Having returned to her locker, Joey was once again in the process of "tidying it". She tucked her hair behind her ears and rolled her eyes.

Okay, so... _maybe_ Pacey did care. A little bit.

Looking back over everything Pacey and she had done together this year - restoring the _True Love_, dancing lessons, building the B&B - she had to reluctantly admit that Pacey put a lot more effort into it all than simply someone who was getting free home-cooked meals and math tutoring sessions out of the bargain.

He'd been there this year when she needed him the most. And for that she really was grateful.

Still, she wouldn't deny the whole thing stung. A lot. She'd been so completely unaware of their arrangement, and sucked in so deep; she couldn't help but re-evaluate things.

She frowned to herself. It was hard to believe that the only reason Pacey would hang out with her was because Dawson asked him to. She shrugged. Maybe next time she saw Pacey she'd ask him just that.

Taking a deep breath to clear her thoughts, she made a decision there and then. Before this whole debacle had occurred, she'd been eager to look at the notion of possibility. So, in keeping with the spirit of that, she was willing to give Pacey the benefit of the doubt.

Because, even if she was unsure about his reasons for being in it, she knew she wanted Pacey in her life.

No matter why he was there.

**********

With his school bag on his right shoulder, Dawson quietly pulled the classroom door shut behind him and began to walk toward the school exit. Catching sight of Joey and Pacey repainting the mural, he paused briefly to watch the duo hard at work.

He nodded once and smiled smugly to himself.

He couldn't have scripted a better scene, even if he did say so himself.

Congratulating himself on a job well done on all accounts, he carried on strolling down the hall.

It felt good to know his friends needed him.

**********

"Not bad for a few hours work, huh, Potter?" Pacey shoved his hands deep in his coat pockets after turning his collar up against the wind.

Without prior discussion, the pair was walking toward the Potter residence, reluctant to part company after their recent détente.

"Well, we didn't start on the actual mural but... we do indeed have a clean slate," Joey agreed – with qualifiers, of course.

"Hey! What's this "we" stuff? _Tonight_ is the beginning and end of my artistic career," Pacey asserted, bumping her shoulder.

"Oh, don't worry! I wouldn't let you near a brush. But you can always fetch rags for me," she offered slyly, the tip of her tongue slipping out between her teeth. With her wool hat pulled low over her ears and her scarf wrapped up to her chin so just the ends of her braids were visible, her face was windblown pink.

Pacey's breath caught in his throat at just how truly stunning she was, even in her paint-spattered overalls.

Not quite ready to admit that he'd eagerly be her gofer or anything else she asked of him, he retorted dryly, "Gee, thanks, Jo. I'll see if I can fit it in my schedule."

Enjoying the sound of her laughter, he waited a moment before continuing, "Speaking of schedules... ya hear the good news? You're looking at the newest member of the Capeside High Mentoring Program."

"Really?!" Joey's eyes opened wide. "Wow. I honestly do not know what to say to that."

"I know, it's great, isn't it!"

"For you maybe. But what about the kid you'll be mentoring."

Pacey rolled his eyes. "I just _love_ how everyone has oh-so-much faith me in," he said sarcastically.

Joey looked confused before bobbing her head. "Ah, Dawson concurs I take it. Well, just don't take this kid over the state line and I'm sure you'll be fine." She frowned. "What _are_ you planning to do with him?" She glanced up at Pacey when he didn't answer. "You don't have any idea do you?"

"Nope. Not a clue." Pacey clapped his hands. "But how hard can it be, right?"

Joey rolled her eyes this time.

"C'mon! Kids love me!"

Joey had to give him that.

"You know, you could always help me out-"

"Oh no!" Joey interrupted. "You're on your own, Pace. I've got enough on my plate with Alex. I don't need any more preadolescences in my life, thank you very much." She paused a moment then suggested, "What about the _True Love_?"

"What about it?"

"I bet a little kid would love helping out with fixing that up."

Pacey pursed his lips then nodded. "Hey, that's not a bad idea!" After a beat, he slanted his head to one side. "Wait a minute... you wouldn't be tryin' to get out of manual labor yourself now would you, Potter?" He teased.

"Who, me?" She smiled innocently, causing him to chuckle.

"Yeah, that's what I thought."

They continued to walk in companionable silence both a little lost in their thoughts. Despite the tumult of the last few days, which had rubbed her feelings raw, Joey felt as though her world axis was tilted a little more toward normal at the moment. Her heart was always wary, and not without good reason, but she was glad she and Pacey had patched things up.

She _did_ need him.

Pacey, on the other hand, was having a hard time containing his exhilaration at Joey's earlier heartfelt admission of gratitude. He couldn't stop the grin that spread across his face as her words replayed on a continuous loop in his mind…

_For being yourself… for not caring what anybody else thinks… for knowing what's right and wrong… for being there this year when I needed you the most… _

_...when I needed you the most… _

_...when I needed you the most… _

She needed him! Joey Potter needed him. _Him_!

His reverie was interrupted by Joey's sharp observation. "Do I even want to know what you're smiling about?"

Pacey ducked his head and tried to contain himself as he laughed sheepishly at being caught. "Just happy to be headed toward a hot meal, Potter."

Joey rolled her eyes and shook her head. "You're so predictable, Witter." She tugged on his coat sleeve as they came to the end of the driveway. "C'mon, I'll race you to the door."

Chasing her up the driveway, letting her win by a nose, laughter rolling out between great gasps of visible breath, both hearts were light as they tumbled through the door into the waiting warmth.

Pacey knew he still wasn't everything to Joey that he might want to be but, for now, he was happy to know that she needed him in some way.

They really were starting to finally get somewhere.

**********

**"You And Me" by Lifehouse**

What day is it? And in what month?  
This clock never seemed so alive  
I can't keep up and I can't back down  
I've been losing so much time

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do  
Nothing to lose  
And it's you and me and all other people  
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

One of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right  
I'm tripping on words  
You've got my head spinning  
I don't know where to go from here

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do  
Nothing to prove  
And it's you and me and all other people  
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

There's something about you now  
I can't quite figure out  
Everything she does is beautiful  
Everything she does is right

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do  
Nothing to lose  
And it's you and me and all other people  
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you  
and me and all other people with nothing to do  
Nothing to prove  
And it's you and me and all other people  
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

What day is it?  
And in what month?  
This clock never seemed so alive

**********


	19. Attitudes and Gratitude

A/N: Hello everyone! TGIF! This week's update looks at the **To Green, With Love** epi. Similar to last week, we have a number of missing scenes which weave throughout key moments of the epi. We opted to bookend the ficlet with songs as, well, we couldn't decide on which one we preferred ;) The first one is almost a message from us to Pacey; the second is a beautiful, simple song which fits the moment in the final missing scene. As usual we don't own the songs or the lyrics.

Heads up – as it's the holiday weekend next week, we are taking a little hiatus and we will be back after Thanksgiving. Hope everyone has a great time and we'll see you on the flip side!

Special thanks to **Seersha** and **LaLe LiLa** for taking the time to post feedback last week, and **FyreFlye** for the author alert.

*~* **Attitudes And Gratitude***~*

"No Worries" by Simon Webbe

I just know your life's gonna change  
Gonna get a little better  
Even on the darkest day  
I just know your life's gonna change  
Gonna get a little further  
Right until the feelings change

So, is this how it goes?  
Think you've come this far with nothing to show  
That ain't so, no  
You don't see where you are  
And if you don't look back you know you'll never know

Cause you think that you've been living, just treading water  
And waiting in the wings for the show to begin  
But I always see you searching  
As you try that bit harder  
Getting closer, oh yeah, to the life you're imagining

[chorus]  
(I just know your life's gonna change)  
Maybe not today, maybe not today  
Some day soon you'll be all right  
(I just know your life's gonna change)  
Don't turn the other way, turn the other way  
Feels like luck is on your side  
(Just wanna live)  
No worries, no worries  
(Don't wanna die)  
No worries, no worries  
(Fight through the lows)  
Say it for me, say it for me,  
(And take all the highs)  
We all need somebody  
(Yeah we can sink)  
No worries, no worries  
(Or can you swim)  
No worries, no worries  
(Or walk on out)  
Say it for me, say it for me,  
(Or jump right in)  
We all need somebody

So, baby keep drifting on  
Your endeavors ain't just selfless wasted time  
Seek and find, yeah yeah  
You're not that far from what you've hoped and wished for all along

Cause you think that you've been living, just treading water  
And waiting in the wings for the show to begin  
But I always see you searching  
As you try that bit harder  
Getting closer, oh yeah, to the life you're imagining

[chorus]

I just know your life's gonna change  
Say it for me, say it for me  
We all need somebody

*~*

Pacey placed a box of nails and a can of turpentine onto the counter and grabbed his wallet from his back pocket. "Just this today, thanks, Mr. Jenkins."

The elderly owner of the hardware store smiled at the young man as he rang up the items. "Boat nearly done, son?"

"Getting there, sir. Workin' on the cabin now."

"Have you decided on what color you're going to paint her?"

"Yes, sir," Pacey nodded. "She'll have a blue hull with a white hatch and cabin."

"Ah." The corner of Mr. Jenkins' eyes creased as he smiled appreciatively. "She'll be a beauty." He added with a wink, "Worthy of her namesake."

Pacey simply bobbed his head noncommittally and looked away with a smile. His eyes were drawn to the store's bulletin board behind the counter. In particular, to a plain black and white flyer pinned in the center.

_To rent... wall space... temporarily available... suitable for advertising... good size... central location... $100... call for more information..._

Pacey pursed his lips, head tilted slightly to one side, as he took stock of the ad. Mentally filing the information under "rainy day ideas", he gathered his goods into one hand. He used his free one to slap the counter. "I'll be back Tuesday, Mr. Jenkins, to check if those other nails have come in yet."

"Sure, son. Deliveries come in the afternoon. Stop by after school."

With a wave, Pacey headed out the store, the bell jingling as the door opened then closed behind him. Bracing himself against the chill of the crisp morning air, he slipped the bag with the nails and turpentine into his coat pocket and took off in the direction of the boatyard.

Although he was walking away from it, his mind was still very much on the ad.

And possibility.

*~*

"…and they'd be ready for first thing tomorrow, right?" Pacey pulled out a dog-eared scrap of paper from his coat pocket and, gesturing with his hand if he could borrow the pen resting on the counter top, scribbled down a note.

"Yep, 10am at the latest," The copy shop owner reassured, his manner friendly. "You'd need to give us the design and let us know the final number of copies you want as soon as possible though."

"Uh-huh, sure, I'll have that confirmed for you by the end of the day; but like I say, as for the number of copies we'll need around 500 at the max."

Running the tip of his tongue against his bottom lip, Pacey made a quick scan of his list to double-check that he'd covered everything. Happy he had, he returned the pen and shook the owner's hand. "Thanks again, sir," he smiled. "You won't regret this."

Walking quickly toward the exit, Pacey checked the wall clock on his way. Stepping out onto the sidewalk just as someone was walking by, he bumped their elbow, almost causing the latté in their hands to go flying.

"Oh, man, I'm sorr-" His apology died on his lips when he recognized who the owner of the elbow and latté was. "Watch where you're goin' why dontcha!" he chastised.

"You're the one who walked into me, little brother," Doug said calmly, adopting his police officer voice. He used a spare napkin to mop up the errant drips that had escaped through the plastic lid and rolled down the side of the container. "If you'd pay attention to where you're-"

"Yeah, yeah," Pacey brushed past his brother and started to walk purposefully in the direction of the small electronics store at the end of the street. "I don't have time for this."

Doug widened his stride to easily keep up pace. "Haven't seen you around the apartment lately."

"Aw, ya missin' me, Dougie?" Pacey cocked his head to look at his brother and smiled charmingly.

"Enjoying the peace and quiet is more like it."

Other than an exaggerated eye roll, Pacey ignored him; he turned his attention instead to his list and cast his eyes downward as he consulted it while they walked.

"What you got there?"

Pacey raised one finger and shook it in the air. "You know, Doug, those police observation skills of yours simply astound me at times," he said dryly. He held up the object in question. "This here is a piece of paper. People write things on it. It's called… wait for it… a list."

"Funny, Pacey. Real funny." Doug shook his head. "I don't suppose what's on that _list_ of yours is what's been keeping you so busy lately."

"You'd suppose right."

"I swear, Pacey, it would be easier getting blood from a stone sometimes," Doug complained.

The two brothers caught each other's eyes and reluctantly grinned at each other. They simultaneously came to a stop and Pacey turned on his heels to look at his brother fully.

"Sorry, Doug." Pacey rubbed the back of his neck and sighed. "It's just, I'm on a tight deadline here. I've got like," he glanced at the list still in his hand, "five more things to do today before I head over to the pre-rally meeting at the B&B tonight."

"Pre-rally meeting…? Oh!" Doug lifted his coffee cup as realization set in. "I heard one of the guys down at the station mention his kid was going to that. You're helping out with the Principal Green campaign."

Pacey simply nodded.

"Well, you need any help? I'd be happy to volunteer…," Doug trailed off when he noticed the stormy look that crossed Pacey's face and the way he'd clutched the list tightly in his hands. "What?"

Pacey let out a rush of air as he chuckled. "Thanks but I think we have enough 'volunteers'," he said sarcastically.

"Is that so?"

Pacey nodded; his eyes drifted to the side as he stared unseeing at the passing traffic. "Oh yeah. We even have us some 'ivy-league' volunteers."

"Uh-huh," Doug took a sip of coffee through the hole in the lid as he carefully studied his brother's body language.

"Yep. Fresh off the train from Boston."

"Boston, you say."

Pacey continued to nod. "Mm-hm. 'Volunteers' that are special enough to warrant free digs at the B&B, no less."

"Really? Well, I wouldn't need a place to stay. Seeing as I live here."

Pacey's eyes shot back to Doug's, as if suddenly remembering he was there. "Huh?"

"I said, if I volunteered, I wouldn't need to stay at the B&B because…," gauging from Pacey's face that it was pointless to explain, he gave up. "Never mind."

Pacey shrugged, already off in a world of his own again as he looked back at the traffic. He launched into a topic as though they were mid conversation, his hands punctuating his diatribe. "I get why she likes him. I do. He's smart, like her. He's in college, which is where she wants to go. He writes _poetry._ And the way she only sees him, I can understand that, too. 'Cause that's exactly what she's like when she's with someone." He smiled to himself, as though picturing a scene in his head where he was that 'someone'. "It's one of the things I like the most about her, the way she does that; they walk into the room and she only has eyes for them. She gets this huge smile on her face…," His smile quickly evaporated as his thoughts changed. "But what kind of name is AJ anyway?" He continued, not waiting for a response, "Some fancy-schmancy double initial name. I mean, come on, who names their kid that? Probably stands for something which you can only pronounce with a posh accent and has five syllables." He chuckled dryly. "Although I can think of something for the 'A' which only has _two._" He finished the rest of his thoughts under his breath.

Barely catching just what this two-syllable word beginning with 'A' was exactly, Doug raised his eyebrows; he wasn't sure if he should be amused or concerned over his brother's tirade. After a brief pause, he asked warily, "You sure everything's okay, Pacey?"

Pacey frowned and looked at Doug as though he'd grown two heads. "Yeah, 'course, why wouldn't it be?" He shook himself like a dog and waved the list. "Look, I gotta get going." He began walking backwards along the street. "We don't need any more volunteers, but I'll bring the petition to the station later and maybe you could help rustle up a few more names?"

"Yeah, sure, Pacey. Whatever you need."

Doug watched as Pacey bobbed his head then twisted round and high-tailed it to the store. He turned around and began strolling in the opposite direction, back to where he'd parked his patrol car. He shook his head and lifted his coffee to take slow, regular sips.

One thing he could say for certain about his little brother - it was never a dull day with him around.

*~*

The Potter Bed & Breakfast had been overrun by enthusiastic, dedicated Capeside High students. At first glance, there didn't seem to be any organization to the milling crowd but Joey Potter moved quietly and purposefully among the students assigning tasks and offering guidance and gratitude.

Her eyes often drifted to the boy lingering on the periphery of the activity who encouraged her with small smiles and indiscernible nods. His presence there seemed to bring out the strength and courage in her that was often hidden behind a sarcastic, studious demeanor.

Despite the urgency she felt to stop the injustice of the ultimatum delivered upon Principal Green, a part of her thrilled at the presence of the boy. Drawn to him, she occasionally touched base with him physically, their hands and sometimes their lips brushing together.

Leaning against the wall on the opposite side of the room, Pacey watched this scene play out right in front of him while his guts churned with unfocused anger, or was that thinly masked anguish? His role in Joey's life had been marginalized with the arrival of college guy and he didn't like it one little bit. He'd always known he'd have to play second fiddle to Dawson but _this_… this was just intolerable.

Perched on the arm of the couch next to Jack McPhee creating flyers on his Mac, Jen Lindley, with her keen perception of the underlying tension in the room, kept a watchful eye on the players of the drama unfolding before her.

Jack's voice interrupted her scrutiny, "Hey! Are you listening to me?" He glanced up at the girl and then turned his head to see what held her attention across the crowded room. He took a moment to observe and identify Jen's targets. Returning his attention to her face, he asked, "How long has that been going on?"

Jen glanced down at him. "Long enough to suck."

Jack surveyed the room to see his sister still pacing and talking on the cordless phone. "No need for Andie to know."

"No, not yet, anyway," Jen assured him.

"Got a plan?" Jack inquired.

"It's a sticky one, my friend." She narrowed her eyes at the triangle in question. "I don't think my intervention would be appreciated. But I do think I will go lend an ear." She slid off the arm of the couch and headed in Pacey's direction.

Sometimes that's all a friend _could_ do.

*~*

The light-blue pickup truck shuddered to a halt as Joey stalled at the traffic lights. After a quick look in the rear-view mirror to check for traffic, she shifted into neutral and turned the key in the ignition.

She stole a glance at Bessie, who was sitting immediately next to her in the cab. "Sorry, just give me a sec," she mumbled sheepishly, glad that the late hour ensured that darkness hid her burning cheeks.

"Take your time, Joey," Bodie, sitting furthest away from her beside the passenger door, replied with a relaxed voice. He jiggled Alexander playfully in his arms causing the child to laugh. "We're in no rush."

"I'm fine when I'm in motion," Joey reassured, feeling the need to explain. "It's just when I get to lights or stop signs...," she trailed off with a sigh.

Bessie placed her hand lightly on her sister's thigh. "You're doing great, Jo." She waited until Joey got the truck moving again before continuing, "I still can't believe how many people were there tonight. The auditorium was full!"

"I know, you and me both," Joey agreed. "Most of the school showed up. Even some students from the other schools in the area came to support us."

"How did you manage to get word out so quickly, by the way?" Bodie asked. "I know when everyone was at our house the other night you were busy making arrangements, but I never actually knew what that involved."

Joey shrugged. "The usual. Flyers... the internet."

"Huh. Very resourceful," Bessie said, impressed. Then she frowned as a thought occurred to her. "Sounds expensive though. I hope you didn't spend too much of your own money because-"

Joey quickly interrupted, "Oh, it didn't cost anything. We posted an announcement on the Capeside website and got the flyers made for free."

"For free? How did you manage that?"

"Well, actually... _I_ didn't."

Bessie turned her head to look at Joey. "Who did then?"

"Pacey. He talked the owner of the copy shop on Main Street into helping out."

"Wow. Go Pacey! So, did you do the internet announcement thingy then?"

Joey shook her head. "No, that was Jack. It was Pacey's idea to use the internet to spread the word but Jack's the best at using a PC so he took care of that."

"_Pacey's _idea?" Bodie spoke up.

"Uh-huh," Joey confirmed.

Neither sister heard Bodie say "Uhh_-huhh_" under his breath as he spotted the common denominator. In a louder voice he asked, "Wasn't Pacey the one I saw setting up the microphone at the podium tonight, too?"

"Yeah, I guess. He put up most of the flyers around town as well." Suddenly feeling guilty but not sure _why_ she should be, Joey went on the defensive. "Look, everyone helped out, okay? Andie made the phone calls at the B&B, as you already know. Jen helped with the organization and flyers, Jack the website and flyer design and Dawson with the interview that Gale and he worked on. Even AJ helped. I couldn't have pulled this thing off on my own, you know!"

"We know, Joey," Bessie said gently.

"So why do I feel like you're trying to make a point and I'm missing it?"

Bessie looked confused. "We are? No we're not."

"Sounds like Bodie is," Joey countered, an edge to her voice.

Bodie raised his arms up as far as he could while still keeping Alex steady and chuckled. "Hey, easy, Joey. It's just... you have a lot of people in your life supporting you. All of whom believe in you and are willing to help out at a moment's notice."

Joey frowned, remembering AJ had said a similar thing to her. "And this is a _bad _thing?"

"No, not at all," Bodie chuckled even more now. "It's a very _good_ thing."

"Okay, now I'm confused," Joey replied, exasperated.

"That wasn't my goal," Bodie responded. He sighed and after a moment clarified, "I guess, all I'm trying to say is, I hope you thanked them all."

"Of course I did!"

Bessie chimed in now. "Hmm... are you sure, Joey?"

When Joey opened her mouth to retort, Bessie explained diplomatically, "Don't get me wrong, Joey. I know it's not that you're ungrateful. But I know you. And sometimes you can get so caught up in everything, I think you believe you've said thank you, but you haven't."

Joey dropped her shoulders. "No, I'm sure I did." Her voice was quiet, unsure.

"Well, okay then." Bessie reached over and squeezed Joey's upper arm. "I meant what I said earlier, Joey. You were amazing tonight. I really am proud of you."

"We both are," Bodie interjected.

When Alex made a little noise and a baby-giggle, Bessie laughed. "See, I told you Alex couldn't stop talking about you, either. We're _all_ very proud of you."

Joey lifted her lips as best she could, her earlier joy from the evening dampened by her thoughts.

_She had thanked them? _

_Hadn't she?_

Before she knew it, the lights of the B&B came into view and she was driving up the driveway.

"You know, you've gotten a lot better at driving, Joey." Bessie praised as everyone exited the truck. "I think I still have gray hairs from the last time I tried to teach you," she joked. "Thank goodness for Dawson."

"Pacey." Joey corrected.

"Hmm?" Bessie looked over her shoulder at Joey as they all climbed the porch steps; Bessie in the lead, then Joey, with Bodie and Alex bringing up the rear.

"Pacey. You mean 'thank goodness for Pacey'." She waited until Bessie had unlocked the front door then followed her inside. "He's the one that's been teaching me, not Dawson."

Bessie opened her eyes wide in surprise as she slipped out of her coat. "Oh, ok. He certainly has been busy, hasn't he?"

Placing her own coat on top of her sister's on the coat hook, Joey shrugged. "Hmmm. I guess."

Leaving the Potter sisters to themselves as they began conversing about dinner arrangements, Bodie carried a now sleeping Alex into his bedroom. Laying him down on his bed, Bodie gently tucked his son in and lovingly ruffled his soft curls.

"Women, eh?" he whispered. "And they think us men are the oblivious ones." He shook his head good-naturedly and, after placing a butterfly kiss on Alex's forehead, went to join his girls in the kitchen.

*~*

The wide expanse of red bricks, marred by a flaking billboard long past readable, seemed to stretch before Joey endlessly. Just preparing the space for a work of art would be a huge undertaking. Painting this wall would require a plan. She couldn't just recreate the mural she had painted at school. She needed to conceive an image that would allow her to express… what?

Well, that's what she had to figure out.

Joey slid the brush into her coat pocket and set the paint can at her feet so she could pull her hat down over her ears. She wondered what words of wisdom AJ would have to share about this artistic endeavor.

He didn't seem to think she needed him and maybe she didn't; not the way she needed Dawson and Pacey. But she did value his maturity and experience and consequently, his opinion. Besides, as a writer he understood the process of creation. A blank canvas, a blank wall. He would appreciate her dilemma; he had faced many a blank sheet of paper in his creative quests, or so she would like to imagine.

So maybe she didn't _need _him.

But she did _want _him.

Joey sighed and wondered if it would be too forward if she called him later. She had given him only the briefest of updates on the outcome of their protest in a hurried call between classes. He had been appropriately sympathetic and cautioned her against discouragement.

But she _did_ feel discouraged because despite their best efforts, Principle Green resigned. He had assured her that he never felt more successful and yet her emotions still fluctuated from outrage to pride to sorrow.

Her eyes roamed the blank brick from corner to corner, marveling again at its dimensions. No, there would be no painting tonight. Though she was somewhat sheltered between the two buildings, it was still the middle of winter _and_ nighttime. Joey was not only getting cold but her mind was as blank of ideas as that wall.

Not taking her eyes from the space Pacey had rented for her, she reached down for the can and then walked backwards until her feet hit the cement of the sidewalk. Once there, she turned and headed for home.

She wondered where Pacey had gone, anyway. He'd as much as abducted her from her house to get her down here and now he'd disappeared. Joey shook her head, smiling to herself again at Pacey's ability to surprise her and challenge her.

Suddenly inspired to surprise _him_, she made an abrupt turn toward the harbor. If Witter was as predictable as she thought, she had a hunch just where he might be.

*~*

Under a portable worklight, Pacey had his toolbox open but was really only puttering. A cold wind had been blowing off the water, keening and sharp, so he had taken refuge below. His thoughts were not so much on any renovation task as they were on the brown-eyed beauty as she had looked under the street light, giving him that lop-sided grin along with her heartfelt thanks.

Hearing the ladder bang against the hull, he stepped out of the cabin door onto the first step and peered into the shadows; the glow from the utility light, hanging from the pole in the middle of the boatyard, swallowed by the wintery night.

And then he saw a mitten appear above the edge of the _True Love_, holding a paint can that looked suspiciously familiar. Rolling his eyes, he rushed to the ladder as the matching wool hat of the brunette in question popped up where he could see it. Grabbing her hand, he took the can from her and helped her over the edge.

"Hey!" she said softly.

"What's the matter, Potter, couldn't even get a base coat on without me?"

"A work of art takes more than a can of paint and a roller, Pacey!" Bristling, Joey began to explain but Pacey, who had come up on deck in nothing but his jersey and jeans, had turned his back to her as he made his way back down the steps into the cabin and out of the cold.

Rolling her eyes behind his back but abandoning her defense, Joey followed him.

Once inside Pacey set the can on the floor and leaned against the counter, his arms folded across his chest, his eyes on his unexpected visitor. It seemed he wasn't the only one who was easily figured out and he wondered just what she was up to.

He took the brush that Joey held out to him and watched as she pulled her hat off. Her hair stood on end from the static electricity in the dry air and backlit from the worklight she looked like a mad angel with her finger in an electric socket. At that image, he couldn't stop the grin from spreading across his face, his eyes twinkling at the sight. She tossed the hat along with her coat on the bunk and twisted her hair up with an elastic, ruining the effect. Then turning to face him, she held out her hand.

Pacey slapped the brush back into it and she smirked, lifting her eyebrows at the paint still resting on the floor. Her purpose finally obvious, Pacey stooped to pop open the lid and then set the can on the counter.

He tilted his head toward the cabin wall to her right.

Then Pacey picked up a brush of his own and they simultaneously dipped into the paint, both smiling at their silent exchange.

Quietly, side by side, they worked, gradually transforming a wreck into a different kind of masterpiece.

*~*

"Brightest Hour" by The Submarines

Wandering through starry skies  
And when tomorrow's day arrives  
I'll be a moment closer to the  
Brightest Hour here with you

One step closer, getting brighter  
One step closer, getting brighter

Wandering through starry skies  
And when tomorrow's day arrives  
I'll be a moment closer to the  
Brightest Hour, here with you

*~*


	20. Don't Come Easy

A/N: We're baaaack! Did ya miss us? Hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving, and enjoyed your "dessert" ;) We've finally reached the **Cinderella Story** epi. You can smell the anticipation in the air LOL Now, this epi is a little different as it ends on a cliff hanger. As we wanted to address the infamous kissing scene as a whole, we opted to assume this epi concludes just as Pacey pulls the car over at the Capeside welcome sign. Sorry guys! You need to hang in there just a _little_ bit longer for that. But hopefully it'll be worth the wait.

Usual disclaimers apply; we don't own the characters or song lyrics. Special shout out to the following who took the time to leave us feedback last time/create alerts; thank you! – **chixieflicks828**, **nightshadowlife**, **leah0628**, **paceyjoeytruelove**.

*~* **Don't Come Easy** *~*

**Patty Griffin "When It Don't Come Easy"**

Red lights are flashing on the highway  
I wonder if we're gonna ever get home  
I wonder if we're gonna ever get home tonight  
Everywhere the waters getting rough  
Your best intentions may not be enough  
I wonder if we're gonna ever get home tonight

But if you break down  
I'll drive out and find you  
If you forget my love  
I'll try to remind you  
And stay by you when it don't come easy

I don't know nothing except change will come  
Year after year what we do is undone  
Time keeps moving from a crawl to a run  
I wonder if we're gonna ever get home

You're out there walking down a highway  
And all of the signs got blown away  
Sometimes you wonder if you're walking in the wrong direction

But if you break down  
I'll drive out and find you  
If you forget my love  
I'll try to remind you  
And stay by you when it don't come easy

So many things that I had before  
That don't matter to me now  
Tonight I cry for the love that I've lost  
And the love I've never found  
When the last bird falls  
And the last siren sounds  
Someone will say what's been said before  
Some love we were looking for

But if you break down  
I'll drive out and find you  
If you forget my love  
I'll try to remind you  
And stay by you when it don't come easy

*~*

As he steadily sipped the steaming caffeine through a plastic lid, Pacey thanked God that the city council in Barnstable did not practice the prejudice towards McDonald's that Capeside did. Not only did they have Ronald's finest establishment but it was open twenty-four hours a day!

Carefully, he set the foam cup in the convenient holder and leaned forward a bit, his arms crossed at the top of the steering wheel. Scanning the road before him and seeing no other traffic, he sped up.

Despite his penchant for sleeping late, this could technically still be considered the night before and not early morning. Something in that convoluted logic made it okay for him to be awakened by a distress call from Joey. Of course, he couldn't actually think of any reason it _wouldn't_ be okay if she called and needed him. Early morning… mid-afternoon… late night… whenever.

He was there for her.

Only he couldn't help but wonder _why_ she'd changed her plans and left early. He could tell she was upset. She hadn't been crying on the phone but he knew she had been sometime before she called. He _knew_ her. Plus he had firsthand experience of what she sounded like when she'd been crying - the way her nose sounded blocked and her voice became gravelly.

His eyes on the road ahead, his mind repeated their earlier phone conversation.

"_Pacey?" Her voice had wavered but she had not sniffled. _

"_Jo? Jo, what's wrong?" He had been trying to wake up and make sense of why she was calling so late. She was supposed to having the time of her life. _

"_Nothing. Nothing's wrong. Look, I'm at South Station and I need a ride home. The next train for Capeside doesn't leave until 9 in the morning. Will you… can you come and get me?"_

_He became wide awake at this request, the furrow between his brows deep. "Are you okay?" _

"_Yes! I'm fine. So? Can you come and get me or not?" Joey had sounded exasperated. Leave it to Potter to need a favor and then be pissy about it. _

"_Yeah, yeah… of course. Sit tight. I'll be there as soon as I can."_

Pacey ran his fingers through his hair and stretched his neck to one side until he heard it crack. Sleeping on Doug's couch was killin' him. Reaching for his coffee, he focused once more on Joey. He couldn't imagine what had happened.

Well actually, he _could_ imagine. As a matter of fact, his imagination was running pretty wild at the moment.

It was obvious – sensitive, poetic college guy turned out to be an asshole.

The muscles in Pacey's neck tensed as he clenched his teeth. Joey hadn't mentioned the specific arrangements but since she had stayed in his room during junior visitation weekend, Pacey didn't think the guy would be a gentleman and book her a hotel room… or put her up with a female friend.

Yeah, the only thing that made sense was that college guy had gotten grabby; all that dancing Joey mentioned they'd be doing that weekend had gotten Mr. Ivy League hot and bothered and wanting more. If so, Pacey's plan was to hunt that sensitive, poetic, little jerk down and kick his ass. He'd make sure there'd be no more dancing, or whatever the kids were calling it these days, for him; yep, he'd be lucky if he was able to walk straight again. That's right, if he so much as touched her inappropriately…

The coffee in his cup spurted out the small hole in the lid, spilling down the sides, as he tightened his grip on it.

"Fuck." Pacey quickly set the coffee down and wiped his hands haphazardly on his jeans.

Plan or no, Pacey was convinced that if college guy had touched Joey in some unwelcome way that he was already bearing bruises. For having himself been on the receiving end of any number of Potter's punches, slaps and pinches over the years, Pacey could attest to the fact that Joey was well able to take care of herself.

Still… He narrowed his eyes at the road ahead, not seeing the pavement stretched out before him but allowing his thoughts to wander even further…

What if those touches had not been _unwelcome?_ His stomach rolled over at the thought, the coffee suddenly sour in his guts. Oh God, he couldn't even think about that. It was bad enough that he had seen them kissing. If Joey _had_ let him touch her and _then_ he was an asshole… Pacey's foot pressed harder on the gas pedal. Then she wouldn't punch college guy but she _would_ be upset and she _would_ definitely leave.

Pacey _was_ going to have to kick his ass!

Taking a deep breath, Pacey didn't let up on the gas but he did recall that Joey had not appreciated her honor being defended the last time he had whupped some ass for her. Another deep breath and he decided that maybe he better wait until he got there to find out exactly what _did _happen.

Pacey's eyes sought out the dim, green glow on the dash and glanced at the digital clock. He was making good time; he'd be there in about thirty minutes give or take. He punched the power button on the stereo system only to have the SUV fill with the soaring sounds of Celine. Pacey immediately cut the diva short by pressing the auto-search key and allowed the radio to skip from channel to channel until he heard the distinctive notes of Jim Morrison's voice. With a sigh of relief he stopped the auto-search.

As Jim encouraged his baby to "_try to set the night on fire"_, Pacey felt a pang of regret at how harsh he'd been with Joey when he dropped her off at the train in Capeside yesterday. She had been excited and full of optimism that this would be a wonderful experience; he had been cynical and pessimistic. Now, she was sitting at South Station in the middle of the night because her wonderful experience had been cut short.

He felt a little guilty.

Well, okay, not _completely_ guilty. Truthfully, some small part of him was actually happy that her fairytale weekend didn't seem to work out. And _that_ made him feel guilty, too.

He _wanted _her to be happy, that went without saying. But it would be really great if _he_ was the one who made her happy. Really, really great. What had he told Buzz? _She's so beautiful, that every time you look at her, your knees tremble, your heart just melts, and you know right then and there, without any reservation, that there is order and meaning to the universe._

Despite her beauty, the order and meaning of Pacey's universe would crumble around him if he didn't tell her the truth about how he felt. Hellmouth and demons aside, he was going to have to take that chance.

Soon.

Because as Jim was now singing, "_The time to hesitate is through."_

Spotting his exit ahead, he flipped on his blinker and with an SUV for a white charger and a brown corduroy coat for armor swooped in to rescue the brown-haired damsel in distress.

*~*

Joey shifted uncomfortably on the hard wooden bench. She glanced down once more at the watch on her wrist and sighed. She'd already known without looking that only scant minutes had passed since her last check, but that didn't stop her from willing the minute hand to have magically gained speed.

Precisely eighteen minutes ago she had not only awakened Pacey but Doug, too. When he'd picked up the phone instead of Pacey, she had prayed that he wouldn't require an explanation for her late night phone call.

For she was unwilling to go into details.

Luckily something that evening was finally going her way for Doug's voice, rough with sleep, had simply said, "Wait a minute." The corners of her lips lifted slightly remembering how Pacey sounded when he first spoke. He seemed befuddled, almost half-asleep, but didn't hesitate when she had requested a ride home, telling her to sit tight; he'd be there as soon as he could.

It never occurred to her to call anyone else; Pacey was the first person that came to mind.

But sitting here now, with nothing to do _but_ think, she wondered if she should have called Bodie instead. She knew he would have come but he did have to work in the morning, providing the _breakfast _portion of the Bed and Breakfast for the few guests she knew they had this weekend. She mentally shrugged; well, it was too late now.

It was too late for a lot of things.

The least of which was changing her mind as to who would rescue her from Boston.

With the acknowledgement that she needed rescuing in the first place, Joey felt her emotions shift and she let out a self-deprecating laugh. Her fairytale romance with the scholar from Worthington was over before it had quite begun.

Her mind replayed the dawning realization at AJ's reading that Morgan was more than a best friend, or wanted to be. From the time Morgan had picked her up until AJ began to read, Joey had been trying to piece together a puzzle that seemed familiar and yet baffling. Then when she heard the words, "…_more than anything, she loved to read the Sunday Times on Saturday night…" _itall became so very clear.

Morgan and AJ were just like her and Dawson.

Or, what they could have been… maybe… once… long, long ago. Because, now, of course, that ship had sailed. But Morgan and AJ hadn't even boarded theirs. And Joey was determined not to stand in their way.

A fresh veil of tears welled up, blurring her vision and she impatiently brushed them away. She barely knew AJ! Pacey was right; all she had was an eyes-closed wish.

So, why was she crying?

Joey gingerly examined that place inside where she carefully hid her feelings. She wasn't distraught because her golden carriage had turned into a pumpkin or because the glass slipper fit someone else's foot.

So, why was she upset?

She poked at those feelings for a moment longer, turning them over and over in her mind. The tears she had shed on the dock the night Dawson had rejected her had been tears of devastation and humiliation.

Tonight, sitting here… she felt neither of those things.

No, she was sad – just plain sad. Naturally, the situation between AJ and Morgan had stirred memories of her and Dawson. But was she sad that things had not worked out between them and never would? She mentally shook her head. No, it went beyond that. Dawson and she were finally in a fairly good place. Any romantic notion she'd had toward Dawson was filed away in the box of past loves. Her lower lip held firmly between her teeth, Joey tried to pinpoint exactly when she had let him go, but couldn't.

When had her longing for him drifted into a wistful memory?

And where did that leave her now?

She rummaged further, delving deep within her heart. And then she knew. She was sad because she was alone. Again. Just like she'd been at the beginning of the school year; nothing had changed.

What was so wrong with her that it seemed she was always doomed to be alone, to never have things work out?

AJ and Morgan had all the possibilities of the future spread out before them for the taking. She wanted the same thing; the intimacy of knowing someone inside out and vice versa.

Someone who was more than a friend.

Someone who was the real thing.

She wanted to feel loved.

Joey emerged from her life ennui when she realized she'd been chewing on her lower lip; she quickly released the plump flesh from her teeth. Ever since Pacey had pointed this habit out to her a few weeks ago and she'd so quickly refuted it, she'd been more aware, trying to quell her urges, eager to prove him wrong. Some habits, however, die hard. She dragged out a deep breath and slumped further down on the bench, tipping her head back to rest on the gleaming surface.

Without turning to look, she could hear snoring from the couple who had obviously taken refuge here for the night and relinquished the tight grip she held on her bag a bit. Glancing around and seeing no one else, she took off her coat and folded it behind her to use as a cushion. Hardly any people had come or gone since she'd been waiting, which added to the creepiness factor of sitting in an almost vacant train station in the middle of the night.

Joey looked at her watch again. Where was Pacey?

She debated what she would tell him. Based on their last conversation, he'd most likely gloat; rejoicing in the fact that he was right. No wish come true for "little scrubber girl Joey". Well, in that case, she would tell him nothing. It was none of his business anyway. She certainly wasn't going to let him comfort her again. It was bad enough that Dawson had sent him to check on her that night of the stripper party.

Dawson and Pacey, the two boys who knew her best.

Joey knew she couldn't talk to either of them about this. She didn't want their pity or comfort or understanding. She couldn't bear the thought that they'd feel sorry for her. Knowing them, they'd concoct another plan to watch over her until they thought she'd recovered from her terrible, horrible broken heart. Behind closed lids, she rolled her eyes. No, it was better that neither of them got any details about the end of her relationship with AJ.

Why didn't she have any girlfriends?

Joey's head snapped up and she swiveled on her rear to swing her feet up onto the bench. Tucking her hair behind both ears, she then wrapped her arms around her knees. She shook her head and berated herself. Despite the fact that Dawson and Pacey acted like idiots sometimes, and their intentions were often misguided, she wouldn't trade either of them for a dozen girlfriends.

Her heart warmed a little with the knowledge that she had Dawson as a friend even after everything they had been through. And honestly, their little wife swapping deal had created an opportunity for her and Pacey to become more than just the sparring partners they'd always been. And for that she was grateful. He had been there for her every time she needed him this year and she had tried to be there for him. She even had to admit that she and Pacey understood each other in a way that Dawson never could due to their less than perfect childhoods.

Even so, she was glad the three of them were bonded together by history and heart.

Still…

She wanted the magic…

For the glass slipper to fit…

For Prince Charming to sweep her off her feet…

For the happily ever after…

For her wish to come true…

…just once.

*~*

For sixty miles, Joey had remained huddled in the corner of the SUV seat staring out the window, refusing to talk about what had happened.

She just couldn't tell him. She couldn't bear his smugness.

Maybe when she wasn't feeling so raw… so exposed… so vulnerable, she'd mention that there was another girl in an offhand, breezy way. Then they'd agree that Pacey had been right - fairy tales were for other girls, not her.

By then she'd be able to laugh it off…

Maybe.

*~*

Pacey peeked at Joey from the corner of his eye regularly, trying to judge how hard he should push for details. Not knowing anything just escalated the drama playing out in his head; his imagination supplying scenarios where she had given him none.

Assault? It didn't look like she had any bruises but she was bundled up in her scarf and coat.

Drugs? It didn't seem as if she was coming down from a coerced acid trip.

But Pacey knew you couldn't always see the damage done to a person's heart.

And, so, he waited. For sixty miles he waited until he just couldn't stand it and had to try once more to get her to open up.

*~*

By the time Joey had vented all her frustration and sorrow, the only thing Pacey could hear was, _"I was going to say - __**you**__, Pacey!". _

Her curt declaration played on a continuous loop in his head.

And he snapped.

He didn't know if it was the right time. He didn't know if she would even be able to hear him. All he knew was that, unlike the morning after the Valentine's party when he'd attempted to confess his feelings, now she was thinking of him.

Suddenly he didn't care if the universe crumbled or demons devoured Capeside.

Joey Potter was finally, _finally_ thinking of him.

Nothing else mattered.

Spying the Welcome to Capeside sign, Pacey abruptly pulled the car to the side of the road and killed the engine.

Jim Morrison was right - _the time to hesitate is through._

Pacey J Witter was tired of waiting.

Now was the time for action.

*~*


	21. Settling

A/N: You guessed it… this week's episode is **Neverland**. Woohoo! The missing scenes alternate from Pacey to Joey throughout the epi. Hope you like the songs we chose. As always, we do not own the characters/song lyrics, and thank you for your feedback and support; please let us know what you think.

Special shout out to the following for taking the time to leave us feedback last week – **leah0628**, **paceyjoeytruelove**, **LaLe** **LiLa**, **pippiboo**, **nightshadowlife** and **girlshapedbox**.

************Settling**********  
by M&M Works**

"Out of the Blue" ~ Ashley Chambliss****

I think it's the way you look into my eyes  
And you carry yourself so well  
Man of the hour, you're too good for your shoes  
If you stumbled you'd think the world fell

But if you look at me like that one more time  
You'll be taking on more than you know  
Out of the blue, I'll be kissing on you  
And making up rules as I go out of the blue

Out of the blue  
Out of the blue  
Out of the blue

Wiser than most, yet you're standing so close  
Are you sharing your sweet energy  
Afraid to look up into your beautiful eyes  
Because I'll know it's perfection I'll see****

But if you look at me like that one more time  
You'll be taking on more than you know  
Out of the blue, I'll be kissing on you  
And making up rules as I go out of the blue****

Out of the blue  
Out of the blue  
Out of the blue****

There's something here  
There must be magic in the air  
There's something here  
There must be magic in the air  
There must be magic in the air****

Out of the blue  
Out of the blue****

I'll be loving on you  
Out of the blue  
I'll be loving on you  
Out of the blue****

Out of the blue  
Out of the blue  
Out of the blue****

I'll be loving on you  
Out of the blue  
I'll be loving on you  
Out of the blue****

Out of the blue  
Out of the blue  
Out of the blue

**********

Ignoring the noise of Joey's outrage at our sudden stop, I explode out of the car.

Now's the time for action.

Right.

Good.

Wonderful.

Just one little problem with my brilliant idea – I don't know what the fuck I'm going to say to her.

Because, suddenly, my mind's gone blank. Not even a lowly tumbleweed to blow through it to keep me company.

Nada.

Empty.

Taking a deep breath to bolster my courage, as I shut the car door, I glance at my hand holding the keys, as if the script of our imminent encounter will have magically appeared on my palm. Nope, nothing there. Where the hell is our resident screenwriter when you really need him?

Wait, what am I thinking? Dawson is definitely the _last_ person we need here right now.

I have absolutely no idea exactly what's going to come out of my mouth in the next few minutes but it is long past the time to say _something_. Or maybe it's just the right time. Regardless, I've chosen my course of action and, unless I want to offer her driving lessons and once again let an opportunity pass me by, this is it.

God, this is really happening.

Finally.

After all these months.

Am I dreaming?

Perplexed, she stands a few feet in front of me, questions flying between us. The river behind her glitters in the early morning sun, framing her face perfectly. She's a vision - her hair is coming loose from the rapid movement of her head as she argues with me, her cheeks pink from the cold and no doubt irritation. But, most of all, it's the look in her eyes. They sparkle. With the fire of her building bewilderment and exasperation, it's a staggering combination. A pissed off Joey Potter is a beautiful sight.

Only, her queries have no answers that I can fully express in words.

So I revert to action instead.

Closing the distance between us, I let her name slip from my mouth as a whisper, almost a plea. My fingers enclose her smooth, cool cheeks as if to prevent her escape. Then, finally, the moment I've been hoping for happens. Our lips touch! Her cheeks may be smooth and cool but those lips are warm and full and soft… oh so soft.

I know I'm definitely not dreaming now; but if I'm wrong, I never want to wake up.

Miracle of miracles, she's not trying to escape at all but clutching the sleeves of my coat so I relax into the kiss, drinking my fill at the sweet well of her mouth.

My head is spinning with the wonder of her and I have no intention of letting her go, not while she's still pliant in my arms and hasn't decked me. It's only when oxygen becomes critical that I gently release those luscious twin pillows of flesh and gaze tenderly at her, waiting for her eyes to reopen.

She's never looked more beautiful.

**********

Pacey seems to have lost what few brains cells he has and, though he might be muttering explanations as he comes around the Witter Wagoneer, I can't really hear what he's saying. I don't understand why we've stopped or what on earth has sent him into a tizzy but one minute I'm spilling my guts; the next he's pulled over and exited the vehicle.

I should have remembered he was never a morning person.

Now we're standing at the side of the road in the freezing cold on this clear winter morning and I'm under interrogation for some incomprehensible reason. Initially, my thought is that he's annoyed that I called him to pick me up. I _knew_ I should have called Bodie! But that doesn't seem to be the crux of Pacey's issue as he continues to badger me with questions that make no sense.

I really thought we were friends!

My confusion and annoyance grow until I'm flapping my arms in near surrender; I have no idea what answers he seeks until suddenly he's so close to me that his solid body shelters me from the wind.

Time seems to slow and stretch, although in reality only seconds pass. His warm hands are cupping my cold face, as if to hold me in place, and all thought disappears from my mind. He leans in and, like a magnet attracted to its polar pair, I don't resist - I follow. I feel his hot breath against my skin a moment before my world narrows and his eyes are all that I can see. Then everything goes dark, for I've instinctively closed my own when his lips claim mine.

He no longer seems to be looking for answers but providing them directly to my soul through my mouth.

I grasp his sleeves with my mitten-clad fingers as his slide into the hair behind my ears. Anchored to him, I melt into the liquid inferno that is his mouth and disregard my need to breathe.

For long moments there is nothing bar fluttering deep inside me and the taste of him, filling me with an unspecified longing for something more.

We break apart ever so slowly; my lips tingling and swollen. My lashes sweep upwards to find him gazing down at me, almost lovingly.

That one look rocks me, promptly restoring reality. With a great gasp of air I realize that Pacey Witter has just kissed me. Pacey Witter, best friend of my best friend, one Dawson Leery, with whom I just spent six months painstakingly restoring our lifelong friendship.

And, just like that, those warm sensations in my stomach dissipate into cold fear.

In a split second, I react.

I push him away.

**********

Miserably, I gaze unseeing at the flickering images on the TV, a bag of chips on my lap. Now that I've had a chance to reflect, I realize Jo might just have a point. In all the dreaming I've done about Miss Josephine Potter, not once did I consider how Dawson might feel when I declared myself.

Despite the ups and downs of our relationship, he's been my best friend for a long, long time. There's no denying the history. I dip into the bag and crunch apathetically on a handful of the salty snack. Growing up, the times when I couldn't go home, I knew I could always retreat to the safety of the Leery's. He let me live in his perfect world where we shared everything – toys, firsts, experiences. Shared, of course, on his terms.

I brush at the chip crumbs on the front of my shirt, causing an avalanche to fall onto Dougie's couch. Given the length and intensity of his relationship with Joey, I wonder under just what terms he'd be willing to share his best friend with me.

Not that it really makes any difference.

Joey let me kiss her… oh my God… Joey let me kiss her. I pause to revel in the memory of her sweet, sweet lips before allowing the violence of the aftermath to invade the moment.

Yes, considering Joey's reaction, how Dawson feels seems to be entirely irrelevant.

Those six miles to the B&B were quite possibly the longest in my life. She didn't say one word the entire ride there. Didn't even glance back when she slammed the car door and ran inside.

Now what am I going to do? I need her.

My meditation is interrupted by my brother berating my choice of breakfast foods and the consequent mess in his pristine living room. He offers me the alternative of pancakes at the diner, his treat, which I'm not about to refuse. Besides, I need someone to talk to. Dawson and Joey are out of the question for obvious reasons and Deputy Doug has been surprisingly supportive this year.

Maybe I'll get more out of breakfast than just pancakes.

**********

I stomp out of the B&B and head for school on foot. My regular ride has failed to show and I can't help but wonder if he's afraid of my brutality or if he's simply given up on me. I resolutely refuse to guess which it is or to figure out exactly how I feel about either.

No, it's a damn good thing Pacey didn't come to pick me up this morning. I don't need him to give me a ride to school! I'm cold but at least I know I'm safe from his hormonal meltdowns.

He kissed me! I still can't believe it. He kissed me. Just like that, out of the blue. Why? Where did it come from? It's crazy; all this is so crazy. I hardly slept last night. My thoughts are haywire and for some strange reason my stomach hasn't been the same since that morning.

It won't settle.

Bessie turned out to be woefully unwilling to dispense sisterly advice in the romance department; for someone who is more opinionated than even me she sure picked the perfect time to clam up. She didn't seem the least bit surprised to hear that I broke up with AJ, however. If anything, I detected relief in her response to that bit of news.

She _was_ appropriately shocked at the nerve of Pacey Witter daring to kiss me but left me to my own devices when I revealed that I might have… maybe… sort of… let him.

So now I'm back to square one.

For all the angst I was feeling in regard to AJ, he's barely crossed my mind. No, the gray matter in my skull seems to be completely occupied by the memory of Pacey's mouth on mine; that hot, wet warmth igniting my nerve endings all the way to the tips of my fingers and toes.

Regardless of how amazing that kiss was, there _is_ still Dawson to consider. I truly don't believe my love life is any of his concern but this is Pacey! The three of us share a bond that goes beyond childhood play dates.

What am I going to do? I need him. I need them _both_.

Dawson's perfect world has always been my refuge and his friendship has always lent me strength. If Pacey and I pair off, it could easily upset the balance of friendship that exists between us all. I just can't risk that. Besides, I made a promise to myself to be there for the both of them. I can't break my promise.

For what?

Tingly lips?

A look? A look that I don't even understand?

Jamming my hands further into my pockets, I trudge toward Capeside High; wishing things could go back to the way they used to be.

The question is, just when exactly do I want them to go back _to_?

**********

It meant nothing.

Joey said kissing me meant nothing.

In the midst of a bustling convenience store, as her fingers slip through mine, the warmth leaves my body and I'm left feeling gutted and a little shell-shocked. I babble on for another minute and then gather my sugar-fueled charge and make my hasty getaway.

The kiss meant nothing.

Joey and I are friends.

Just friends.

Great.

I made a mistake and she confirmed it.

She doesn't feel the same way about me.

That's that.

All those long months of hoping, wishing, longing, for – in her own words - nothing.

We're over before we even started.

One all-too-quick-kiss put aside with a polite handshake, like it never happened.

But it's for the best, right?

I need her in my life and, if this is the only way, then this is the only way.

Right?

Now if someone could just tell my breaking heart that...

**********

A mistake.

Pacey said kissing me was a mistake.

He politely apologized for the kiss.

I politely brushed it off as nothing.

We politely shook hands.

All very civil.

All just a mistake.

Pacey and I are back to just being friends.

Jen was right, right? Not a big deal unless I make it one. I overreacted before, that's all.

A mistake.

But this is good; this is what I wanted, right? Now things can go back to normal.

Great.

Then why, when his hand touched mine, did it feel like something was finally falling into place.

Something I've always wanted.

Only to sense it slip out of my grasp when he let go of my hand.

Following him outside the store to watch him and Buzz walk away, the thought that's been nagging at my mind ever since the other day, waiting patiently for recognition, waits no more.

I didn't just _let_ Pacey Witter kiss me.

Oh God.

I kissed him back.

**********

"Settling" ~ Tara MacLean

Am I real? Am I a dream?  
Am I borrowed? Am I blue?  
Is it just the dust of leaving you settling?

Am I fair? Am I strong?  
Am I there? Do I belong?  
Is it only skin I touch?  
When I reach for you?

Oh, the leaves they fall,  
They go so far sometimes.  
Do I blame the wind?  
Or the tree for letting you go?  
Or do I wave goodbye, Setting?

Do I stay? Do I fight?  
Is it wrong and nothing's right?  
Or is it just the closet light  
I've offered you?

Oh the leaves they fall,  
They go so far sometimes.  
Do I blame the wind?  
Or the tree that let you go?  
Or do I wave goodbye?  
Settling.

So many times I needed  
You to be strong to me.  
But you bend beneath  
The slightest breeze.  
You have no leaves,  
No leaves, no leaves...  
Settling.

Am I fair? Am I strong?  
Do I stay? Do I fight?  
Is it just the closet light?  
Is it only skin I touch,  
Or is it just the dust, settling?

***~***


	22. Clutch

A/N: Are you as happy that it's Friday as we are? LOL **Stolen Kisses** was one epi in particular where we imagined a lot of stuff happened off-screen. As such, lucky readers, we decided to go to town and dedicate more than one ficlet to this important epi. Anyone would think it's almost Christmas, eh? Heeee ;) Since we write the ficlets on a weekly basis, we haven't confirmed just how many we'll write focusing on this epi, but it's a given there will be at least two.

Hope you enjoy this week's offering. We always look forward to reading your comments and feedback, so please don't be shy. Kudos to the following for doing just this last week – thanks you guys! – **pippiboo**, **nightshadowlife**, and **paceyjoeytruelove**.

*******Clutch *********~  
****by M&M Works**

"Almooost… Aha! Gotcha!" Pacey's tongue, which had been poking out over his lower lip as he fiddled with the wires, slipped back inside as he grinned widely, pleased with his handiwork. He fitted the front panel of the washing machine back in place and flipped the switch for the main fuse. The washing machine groaned as it came back to life and commenced its spin cycle. Pacey nodded to himself, happy the problem was resolved. Loose connection, simple as that.

If only everything in his life was as easily fixed.

He shook his head at _that_ thought and dusted his hands on the backside of his jeans. He'd played the "if only" game a couple of hundred times in the past few days. It wasn't fun the first time and it hadn't gotten any more so, so he wasn't about to start again now, _thankyouverymuch_.

Pacey grabbed his corduroy coat from where he'd flung it on top of a pile of clean towels and shrugged it on. He opened the door and cautiously peered around the corner to scan the empty hallway, tilting his head to one side as he listened for any sounds of movement within the B&B. It was still early. He knew from speaking with Bessie that the B&B currently had no guests. Hopefully Joey was tucked safely in bed, sound asleep. He could slip out just as easily as he'd come in, Joey none the wiser.

This was the only reason he'd agreed to come over to take a look at their broken washing machine, picking such an early hour to do the repairs. That and the fact Bessie wouldn't take no for an answer; it was either fix the machine or find another handyman job.

He stepped out of the laundry room and tip-toed down the hallway, heading in the direction of the kitchen. Pacey hadn't been avoiding Joey per se; he'd simply been keeping a low profile since their last encounter, unsure of how to go back to purely friendly feelings for her when these more-than-friendly feelings were so strong.

Ideally, he wanted the first time they saw each other again to be in public, say at school with plenty of other people and distractions around, just in case – where, to clarify for argument's sake, the "just in case" referred to the fact that he wasn't 100% sure what would happen if they were to be alone. He might do something completely inappropriate, like tear off all her clothing and have his way with her.

Somehow, he didn't think Joey would go for that.

So, almost plowing into her as she exited the bathroom, dressed in nothing but a towel, her body still damp from the shower?

It's safe to say it wouldn't have been anywhere on Pacey's to-do list that day.

Yet that's exactly what happened.

*~*

Joey was pretty sure she wasn't dreaming; whether or not she was _breathing_, that was an entirely different matter.

When she stepped into the hallway, still in the process of tucking the end of the towel wrapped around her damp hair into place, Pacey's face was the last one she expected to see standing a mere two feet away. Like Pacey, this wasn't exactly the first encounter après convenience store for which she'd been hoping.

Though she could not have described what the "perfect" first encounter would have been, one thing about which she was absolutely certain, she had wanted to be wearing clothes.

Frozen in place, she could only stare dumbly back at him and blink. He seemed to be having just as much trouble as he stood as still as a statue, his eyes locked on the middle of her forehead.

"I was… er, I just…," Pacey started to explain, but gave up. It took all of his energy, not only to try to stop his blood from leaving his brain and flowing to a certain part of his body, but to also be a gentleman and keep his vision from dropping below her neck. The neck where it just so happened he could see in his periphery vision a water droplet snaking ever so slowly down…

_So, so tempting… silky, soft skin… oh, sweet, sweet, gravity…_

"Pacey!" Joey snapped, breaking him out of his trance. "What the hell?!" She dropped her hands from the towel on her head to the one covering her torso, snatching the top ends in a death grip.

"I was… er, I just…," Pacey eloquently tried again.

"Just _what_?!"

Unable to make his tongue work, Pacey simply pointed behind him, praying his aim was in the general vicinity of the laundry room. No way was he about to move his head to check if his aim was true. Because if he moved it, the only direction his head was going to go was _south_. Plain and simple.

Again, somehow he didn't think Joey would go for that.

Obviously Joey needed to brush up on her sign language skills - something he'd have to mention to her at a later date - for his pointing didn't seem to appease her, only aggravate her more.

"Pacey, I mean it, what are you…," She sucked in a rush of air and dropped her jaw, aghast. "Were you _spying_ on me?!"

"What! _No_!" He squeaked, then sputtered, "I was… er, I just…"

_Want to drop my eyes… oh, please… so very hard… must resist…_

But Joey was unaware of Pacey's inner turmoil for she was currently in the midst of her own. Joey dragged in another deep breath, trying to calm herself.

She wasn't going to overreact. Nope. Not this time.

Overreacting was bad.

It leads to roller skating, feather boas, girl-talk and a queasy stomach.

So, she wasn't going to overreact.

Even if she had to stand in that spot all day, steadfastly ignoring her lack of attire and pretend running into Pacey like this was an everyday occurrence, just to prove her case.

Besides, Pacey had seen her in less, hadn't he? She was more covered up now than when she wore a one-piece, right?

And this was just Pacey. And they were just friends.

No big deal.

No overreacting.

_Why is Pacey staring so hard at my forehead? _

Joey started to raise a hand to see if she had something there, but immediately stilled, unwilling to relinquish her dual hold on her towel. Unexpectedly her thoughts changed direction; her present lack of clothing now drew her attention to the abundance of his.

She glared at the brown coat he was sporting.

_He just _had_ to be wearing _that_ coat, didn't he? _

She refused to acknowledge that her sudden hatred for this coat had something to do with the fact that it was the one that he'd been wearing when they'd kissed, correction when _he'd_ _mauled_ _her_. Or that it was the same coat that had played a key feature in her dream last night – the reason why she couldn't go back to sleep and was up earlier than usual - and she didn't care for the reminder.

No, it was simply that it was the wrong weather for it. Yep. That's all. And, so, she said as much.

"Isn't it a little too warm to be wearing that anymore?" She stated primly.

Pacey's face rearranged into a mystified "_huh_?"

She tipped her chin at his coat, tugging her towel up a little higher.

Pacey finally dropped his eyes from their sentry post at her forehead and looked deep into hers. "Potter," he said dryly, "now is so not the time to be pointing out _who_ is wearing _what_."

Determined to hold her ground, Joey stole a breath to brace herself. "Why? I don't see a problem with what I'm wearing," she replied, putting in as much false-confidence into that fabrication as she was able.

Pacey barked out a laugh. "Y'don't?"

"Nope."

"Not feeling a little... I don't know…_ chilly_?"

She shook her head. "Could stand here all day like this."

"Is that so?"

"Yep."

Their eyes locked in a stalemate.

Pacey couldn't believe that Joey could act so unaffected, when all he wanted to do was throw her over his shoulder and… well, at the risk of sounding redundant, have his way with her.

Unless… maybe, just maybe… she _wasn't_ so unaffected.

"You know what? I _am_ feeling a little… hot."

Joey's pupils dilated a little at the suggestive way he said "hot" but otherwise made no response.

"You're right; it is too warm to be wearing this coat."

Joey held her breath, waiting to see where he was going with this.

"I think I might take it off. Yeah. Maybe even remove a _couple_ of layers while I'm at it." Keen to see how far he could push her buttons, Pacey's irises turned the color of slate as he goaded, "I think I saw some fresh towels in the laundry room. How's about I go change… so we… match?"

At last Joey lost her battle to control her blush; she opened her mouth to annihilate him when Bessie breezed around the corner.

"Oh, hey, Pacey," Bessie smiled at him. "Washing machine all fixed?"

"Y-yeah," Pacey cleared his throat and scratched his nose. "Loose wire is all. It's as good as new."

"Great! Thanks." Bessie's smile disappeared as she looked in turn to each of the teenagers, both of whom were standing awkwardly looking anywhere but at each other. "Everything OK?"

Joey pretended to look confused. "Hmm? No. I mean, yes. Nothing's wrong. Everything's fine."

Pacey bobbed his head eagerly in agreement and quickly added, "Yep. Nothing going on here."

Both of them began speaking at once.

"_Pacey was just-" _

"_I was just-"_

Joey curved her lips into what could be considered a smile, although her eyes held an entirely different expression when they briefly flicked over to Pacey before returning to her sister. "As I was saying… Pacey was just leaving. Isn't that right, Pacey?"

"Right. Uh-huh. On my way out now." Pacey politely brushed past Bessie and began walking to the front door. Just before he reached it he hesitated and turned around.

Even though he already knew what her answer would be, he had to ask. Because that's what friends did, right? And that's what they were now. Friends.

"Jo, you, er, you need a ride? To, um, to school?"

"What?" Joey's eyes grew huge before remembering her sister was watching them intently and she checked her expression. "No. Er, no thank you, Pacey."

Pacey shuffled his feet. "You sure? I could wait 'til…" He dipped his eyes to her towel then immediately looked away and cleared his throat again. Still not looking at her, he waved his hand at her outfit. "…until you're, um, dressed…"

Joey fought to control her blush before it deepened further; otherwise there was no way she would get through this moment. "Nope. 'S'okay. I'm all set."

"Well, okay. I, er, I guess I'll-"

"Yep, see you later, Pacey." Joey cut him off. She flashed him a false smile and then quickly looked away.

Pacey's shoulders dropped when he was unsuccessful in catching her gaze. He attempted a small smile himself. His voice pitched at a low timber, he breathed out, "Yeah. See ya."

Then he nodded a goodbye to Bessie and shut the door quietly behind him.

Joey let one hand fall from her towel and pointed over her shoulder to her room. "So, I'm just gonna-"

"What was that about?" Bessie pinned her sister with her "cut-the-bull" look.

"What was _what_ about?" Joey replied innocently.

"I thought you two sorted things out? That you were back to being friends."

Joey scrunched her face, insisting, "We have. We are."

Bessie raised her eyebrows. "Y'sure?" She studied her sister carefully. "You two seemed to be kinda… awkward."

"Bessie, please." Joey scoffed. "You're imagining things."

"Am I?"

"You are."

Bessie shrugged. Then she frowned as she gave Joey the once over. "You should be more careful, Joey. It's not very appropriate to walk around dressed like that. I know that we didn't have any guests last night, but you should get into the habit of wearing a robe."

"Ya think?" Joey muttered under her breath. Refusing to stand there any longer and converse while dressed only in brushed cotton, Joey sought her getaway. "Whatever, Bessie. Now, if we're all done here…" She spun around, heading straight to her bedroom, slamming her door behind her.

Bessie shook her head knowingly. "Sure I'm imagining things." Then sighed, "Teenagers."

*~*

A bright smile gracing her face, Andie leaned toward the small group seated at the formica-topped table in Capeside High's illustrious dining establishment, otherwise known as the cafeteria, and exclaimed, "Well, I can't wait! What about you, Jack?" Without waiting for his response, she continued, "This is the first time we've vacationed since… well, since forever it seems. Thanks so much for asking us, Dawson. When are we leaving? What should I bring with me? How much room will you have in the car?"

Laughing, Dawson replied, "Let's leave Saturday morning." He raised his heavy brows and looked around the group. "That okay with everyone?"

Nods from Joey and Jack indicated their agreement since there was no chance that they'd get a word in while Andie continued to express her enthusiasm verbally.

Jen frowned, stabbing at the small dish of coleslaw on her tray. "Damn, I have to work. I can't go."

Tray in hand, Pacey approached the table of friends, asking, "Go where?"

He maneuvered into the seat next to Andie, directly opposite Joey. He focused on freeing his sub from its wrapping but peered at her surreptitiously, only to catch her examining her Coke can as if it was suddenly the most interesting thing she'd ever seen.

_See, this is more like it… plenty of witnesses around… no towels in sight… _

Dawson was explaining, "You remember my Aunt Gwen?"

His mouth now full, Pacey nodded. "Your mom's sister," he said as he swallowed then wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "Haven't seen her since I was a little kid."

"We're heading to her place for spring break. Interested?" Dawson offered.

Joey's attention whiplashed from her Coke can to this unwelcome turn in the conversation.

Spring Break with Pacey?

_Oh-ho nooooooooo!_

How in the world would she endure that? Confined to a small space with no escape? Look what happened this morning for crying out loud!

Nuh-uh.

No way.

Pacey felt a sharp, unexpected pain radiate from the center of his shinbone. "Owww… What the…?" He glanced away from his conversation with Dawson to find Joey glaring at him.

"What's wrong, Pacey?" Andie inquired.

Jen's eyebrows rose toward her hairline as she guessed at the unspoken communication going on beneath the table. She hid a smile behind her napkin and caught Jack's eye as Pacey fumbled for an explanation. "I… um… I banged my leg on the crossbar under the table."

As he reached down to rub the throbbing ache, he brushed the sole of Joey's shoe and grabbed the toe, pinching it hard.

Joey snatched her foot out of his grasp and abruptly stood with her tray. "I need to see if there are any computers available in the computer lab before Mr. Maguire's class."

Halting the flurry of good-byes, Jack mumbled through a full mouth. "You know, I think he's gay."

All eyes turned to Jack as he was assaulted by a cacophony of questions and exclamations.

"_What makes you think that?" _

"_Did he hit on you!?" _

"_Nooooo… really?"_

Pacey used the diversion to slip away from the table unnoticed and, dumping the trash from his tray in the nearest receptacle, he made a beeline in the direction Joey had just taken.

*~*

"What the heck was that about?" Pacey flapped his arms in exasperation.

"Wha… what? What was what about?" Joey stuttered a bit, looking up at him from behind the bright blue Apple, tucked in a quiet corner of the computer lab.

"You. Kicked. Me," Pacey accused heatedly.

Joey shook her head, her glossy brown tresses catching the light from a nearby window. "What? No, I didn't!" she refuted indignantly. "Why would I do that? Wait! Is that why you _pinched_ me?" she hissed at him.

"Josephine Potter, you did too kick me! And I want to know why!" Pacey's outrage was growing. He stood across the desk, arms akimbo, daring her to deny it again.

Joey shrugged. "I didn't kick you, Pacey. What do you think? We're five? You probably just bumped my foot under the table. What's the big deal, anyway?" Her tone took on that of one speaking to a child. "Is Pacey hurt? Does poor little Pacey need to go to the ER?"

She resumed a normal tone of voice, one dripping with sarcasm, complete with an eye roll. "It doesn't seem to be broken, you big baby. Now, if you don't mind… I have to work on this paper before the bell rings." She returned her attention to the screen in front of her and began typing, studiously ignoring him.

Pacey stood there for a moment, stunned at her capacity to twist what was clearly a well-aimed kick to interrupt his conversation with Dawson into something accidental.

Wait a second!

…_to interrupt his conversation with Dawson…_

His eyes, stormy gray with irritation, became clear cerulean as he realized that was exactly her intent.

He shook his finger at her. Astonished, he said, "You don't want me to go to Aunt Gwen's!"

Joey continued to ignore him.

"So, all that stuff you said about the events of weeks past being no big deal; it _was _a big deal!"

Despite the fact she didn't want him to go on their trip, a part of him was delighted that their kiss had affected her enough to cause this reaction. This morning was proof enough that _she _still affected him; it was good to finally know he wasn't alone.

"Well, shoot, Potter!" His voice raised an octave. "Why didn't you just say so?!" He beamed at her. "If you can't… restrain yourself enough to be around me, I can understand that." He edged a little closer to her, making his way behind the desk to tower over her.

Joey's head snapped up and she whispered loudly, "Pacey Witter, get over yourself. I just think it would be best for both of us if we didn't spend all of spring break in each other's back pocket."

"But, Jo, if we're only friends, what difference does it make?" He sing-songed, expertly playing his voice like an instrument to dip high then low. "We're _all _friends. We're _all_ just hanging out together on spring break. As _friends_ do." He spread his hands and shrugged in nonchalance, his eyes daring her to contradict him. "C'mon, Jo. Think of all the fun we'll have." Then he leaned in closer, deliberately taunting her about this morning's little incident. "I'll even let you give me some more… fashion tips."

Joey's shoulders slumped in defeat. She peered up at him, her eyes impossibly wide. Lowering her voice even further, she whispered, "_Please_, Pacey?"

Pacey gazed into those big brown eyes, her plea tearing at his heart, and immediately backed down. He fought the urge to reach out and touch her, to smooth her hair behind her ear, to trail his fingers through its luxurious length.

Stepping back with a sigh, he conceded, "Yeah… sure, Jo. Whatever you want." When he cleared the edge of the desk, he turned and made his way out of the lab.

Joey watched his broad back as he walked away, a sense of loss once again nagging at her. She struggled with the impulse to call his name, to apologize, to take it back but resolutely resisted.

In order for them to remain friends, she needed a little time and space to regain her equilibrium. She and Dawson would spend time with Andie and Jack at Aunt Gwen's and by the time they got back, the insane craving to touch Pacey every time he was near her would dissipate.

Wouldn't it?

Then everything could go back to the way it was before.

Back when she wasn't clutching at straws.

*~*

"**Clutching At Straws" ~ Andrea Parker  
**  
Knowing ourself**  
**Who we think that we are**  
**Constantly changing**  
**Constantly changing**  
**So near and so far**  
**Knowing ourself**  
**Who we think that we are**  
**Constantly changing**  
**Constantly changing  
So near and so far  
Who we think that we are  
Who we think that we are

*~*


	23. Author's Note 122509

A/N: **Happy Holidays, everyone!** No update on our ficlet series this week, but that doesn't mean we've forgotten about you! We have a very special Christmas treat, just for you – see what Santa has left for you **All Wrapped Up In A Bow **;) Enjoy!

Love,  
Sherri & Carlie


	24. Trip on Love

A/N: Happy New Year to you all! Continuing with filling in the gaps for the **Stolen Kisses** epi, this ficlet takes care of getting the gang to Aunt Gwen's. Hope you enjoy and please do let us know what you think. Special shout out to the following for leaving feedback (both public and privately) last time – thank you! – **Blackbeltrules13**, **pippiboo**, **ckoder**, **paceyjoeytruelove**, **nightshadowlife**, **Chloe** and **Seersha**.

******** ****Trip on Love **********  
****by M&M Works**

Shading his eyes from the bright morning sun, the sandy-haired boy in the nondescript jacket hailed the _True Love_. "Ahoy there!"

Pacey's broad shoulders appeared at the railing blocking the sunlight as he investigated the source of the unfamiliar voice. Surprise and delight lit up his face as he recognized his childhood friend. "Holy crap! Look who's here - Will Krudski! Hey man, come on up!"

Will scrambled up the ladder propped against the hull of the gleaming blue boat. Handshakes became a manly hug complete with the requisite back pounding. "God, Witter. She's beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. You did all this?"

Pacey beamed with pride as they beheld the _True Love_ but as he formed an answer, he was interrupted by Buzz, who had appeared from the other side of the bulkhead. "He sure didn't do it by himself. If it wasn't for me, he'da never made it this far."

Amused, Will glanced at Pacey. "Your friends are getting shorter and shorter, Pacey."

Pacey rolled his eyes and introduced them. "Will Krudski, Buzz Thompson. Buzz, this is my friend, Will."

"You have friends?" Buzz snarked at him.

"Pipe down, buddy, and get back to work!"

"Slavedriver. You're gonna have to give me bread and water sometime today," Buzz muttered but disappeared back the way he'd come.

"You just had lunch!" Pacey called, exasperated.

Will smiled at the interaction. "So, can I get the grand tour? You can tell me about your new circle of friends while we're at it."

Pacey led Will around the deck. "Just got the mast up last week. Isn't she a beaut?" He smiled proudly. "I should be able to get her into the water in the next week or so." He directed Will down the steps into the cabin. "It's small but it suits me fine," he said as he pushed through the swinging door.

"Wow, this is incredible! Hard to believe this thing was a wreck." Will ran his hands over the counters and poked his head into the bunk space.

Pacey shrugged. "I had lots of help. Everybody pitched in at one time or another. Joey, especially, and the last few months Buzz has been a big help. He's from the Capeside Mentoring Program."

"They finally got you a mentor?" Will deadpanned.

"No, you smart ass," Pacey retorted. "_I'm _the mentor!"

"They let _you _mentor?"

"You know, Cruddy, I'm not the same kid you beat up on the playground. I could kick your ass now," Pacey threatened, although his tone was playful and held no force.

Will laughed. "Just kidding ya, man. So tell me. Joey as in Joey Potter aka Pacey Witter's Archenemy has been helping you restore the _True Love_? How'd that happen?"

"Well, my friend, that is a very long and complicated story, best left for another day. Suffice to say, Joey Potter's all grown up and learned to play nice." He paused for a moment, remembering her most recent assault on his shinbone. "Most of the time," he amended. "Hey! What're you doing here anyway?"

"Taking a break from the old man," Will shrugged.

Pacey nodded knowingly. "I hear ya. How'd you find me? Did you stop at Casa Witter?"

"I was on my way there when I saw Doug downtown. He said you'd been staying with him and I could leave my stuff there then directed me here. Hope you don't mind?"

"Hell no! It's great to see you, man. I'm not sure exactly what kind of entertainment Capeside's gonna offer for a couple of studly young bachelors such as ourselves but I'm sure I can think of somethin'."

Will looked skeptical. "Something legal?" He looked around the cabin again with an appreciative eye. "Hey, I know! Is she ready to launch? We could get her in the water and see if she floats. You know, take her for her maiden voyage," he suggested.

"Yeah… I don't know," Pacey rubbed his hand along the back of his neck as he looked around. "Not quite yet. I've got a few more things to do. I'm not taking any chances with her." A shadow passed his features. "I'd hate to launch her and lose her in the same day."

As Will began to reassure him, he was interrupted by a loud clattering and a muffled, "_Crap!_" Exchanging one wondering and one panicked look they hurried topside to see just what kind of mischief Buzz had caused.

With no more than some minor scratches on the deck from a spilled box of nails, Pacey declared the workday over. An hour later, Will and Pacey had taken the tired youngster home and were headed back to Doug's on foot. Their conversation was as meandering as their path but the kernel of an idea had sprouted in the mind of the curly-headed brunette.

Will was _here_ and there _was_ very little to keep two 16 year-old boys (legally) busy in Capeside.

Very little that Pacey was particularly interested in, anyway.

Especially since what or, more specifically, _who_ Pacey happened to be interested in was going to be some miles away visiting Aunt Gwen.

Wasn't it his duty as a host to make sure Will had an enjoyable Spring Break?

Wasn't the very least he could do is arrange some kind of activity or perhaps, journey that centered on a group of friends spending time together?

Hadn't Dawson invited him to go to Aunt Gwen's? Joey's well-timed kick had distracted him from giving an answer but Dawson was an easy-going kind of guy and his best friend to boot. Surely, the invitation still stood?

Surely it would be okay to go along, even if he showed up at the last minute?

Why, it seemed to Pacey quite inspired, and even predestined, that he entertain Will by joining his friends on their trip for Spring Break.

Despite his urge to confide in someone, especially someone outside his incestuous group of friends, Pacey restrained himself. Rehashing the entirely too brief drama of Joey and Pacey for Will seemed not only painful but pointless.

That didn't stop him from craving proximity to the doe-eyed brunette who had captured his heart though.

Whether Will was privy to the details of why or not.

"Hey Krudski!" he interrupted the boy walking next to him. "What are your thoughts about log cabins?"

*~*

Dawson waited patiently and watched the rearview mirror, only partially listening to Andie explain _again_ why she had to sit in the front seat. "I took a Dramamine but I still get car sick really easily - especially if I sit in the back. This will be better, so much better for all of us, believe me. Thanks for understanding, Joey."

Andie turned to look at the sullen girl in the middle of the back seat. To Joey's left sat Will, the kind-hearted gentleman who had so gallantly helped with her bags. To her right, the door stood open awaiting their last travelling companion to secure the bags and close up the back of the SUV.

Joey's eyes narrowed at the verbose blonde as she forced her lips into an upward curve. "No problem, Andie. I wouldn't want you to get sick all over Pacey back here." As Pacey slid into the seat next to her, she turned slitted eyes on the object of her derision, sounding for all the world as if she meant the exact opposite.

"Are we all set then?" Dawson asked as he backed out onto the street that was the beginning of their journey.

"Nice, Potter. Real nice," Pacey mumbled.

"What? You'd prefer vomit encrusted attire? Hmmm…" She tapped her chin with her forefinger, pretending to debate something. "Thinking about it, it may improve that top you're wearing." She squinted at the logo on the red shirt. "What the hell is A-cubed anyway?"

"Still giving me those fashion tips I see," Pacey locked eyes with Joey briefly, only for her to break the connection and turn away with a blush.

"I thought you two were past all your bickering," Dawson commented wryly. "It's a long ride, kiddies - don't make me separate you!" he said in his most parental voice, laughing at himself.

"By all means, separate us," Joey muttered under her breath.

As Dawson attempted to find a station, the static noise of the radio covered Pacey's lowered voice, "Can't control yourself, Josephine?"

"You wish, Witter."

Dawson fiddled with the tuner. "Alternative? Country? Pop?"

"Alternative!" Joey called.

While Pacey spoke at the very same moment and chose, "Classic Rock!"

"Classic Rock isn't even on the list of choices, Pacey!"

"It should be, considering Alternative is mostly crap. No one I know listens to Country, and Pop is for little girls under 12."

"Alternative is _not_ crap. Not that I'm surprised you'd think that, coming from someone who hasn't listened to anything that's been recorded since _Stairway to Heaven_ was released."

Andie chimed in from the front seat, "She's right, Pacey. I've never heard you listen to anything else. How do you know you wouldn't like Alanis Morissette if you'd just give her a chance?"

Pacey leaned forward to catch Will's eye. "Are they kidding?"

Will chuckled and held up both hands. "As the new guy, I think I'll stay out of it."

Andie twisted around to peer between the two front seats. "Hey, I know! We could sing."

Everyone, including Dawson who up to this point had been letting the debate rage without his input, shouted, "NO!"

Frowning, Andie considered her proposal's rejection and then shrugged, recovering her happy face. "It was just a suggestion," she said turning forward.

Dawson finally settled on MIX 96.5, a combination of hits from the 70's, 80's and 90's, which seemed to satisfy the car's occupants to some degree.

Joey worried her bottom lip, staring straight ahead, her thoughts far from the passing scenery.

It was unconscionable that Pacey should go back on his promise to skip this trip.

_How could he? _

How was she supposed to use this time and space to eradicate any desire she had to touch - _or kiss_, came an unbidden voice – Pacey every time he was near her, if he had broken his word and shown up at Dawson's this morning?

Well, _technically_ he hadn't given his word.

_Technically_, she had implored him not to come and he had reluctantly agreed with her.

She remembered the twinge she felt in the computer lab as he had walked away afterwards. She remembered that nagging sense of loss and how she wished she could call his name and take it all back.

Well, now she had her wish.

He was here.

_Right_ here next to her.

In the close confines of this vehicle.

She found she was all too attuned to his every move – whenever he jiggled his leg, scratched his nose, the rise and fall of his chest – she was highly aware of it all.

_Did he have to breathe so damn loudly?_

Yet each time he shifted position, which was a lot, her nostrils filled with his scent. And he smelled so good. Like clean soap and the ocean and something else that was indescribably delectable.

Something she would like to… taste.

Allowing the plump flesh of her lip to escape, her mind wandered dreamily. Automatically, she reached up to tuck her hair behind her ears, only to remember she'd worn a very tight, high ponytail that day. Something she'd done on purpose; a requirement after another sleepless night spent trying to avoid the dream that had been plaguing her: the one where she relived a certain kiss, where someone's long, warm fingers tunneled through her hair, massaging it, caressing it, both gentle and strong, sending tingles-

A sudden bump in the road restored her to reality and she sat up straight.

She was _not_ going to taste Pacey. Of course not. She _could _and_ would _control herself. The car was packed to the brim with luggage and four of their friends. There was no chance she would actually _touch_ Pacey under these circumstances.

Right?

So, there was her answer.

Safety in numbers.

Group activities.

Stick with the crowd.

Pacey's decision to entertain Will by joining them for Spring Break was no big deal. She gathered her resolve about her like the finest chainmail armor and relaxed back into her seat.

*~*

Andie and Dawson murmured together quietly, having given up on conversation with the occupants of the back seat when the throaty voice of Bruce Springsteen drifted from the speakers.

_You can hide 'neath your covers… And study your pain… _

Drumming his fingers against his denim-covered knee, Pacey began to hum tunelessly shattering Joey's carefully constructed comfort zone.

Her irritation back in spades, she snapped, "I thought we weren't singing, Pacey!"

At this, Will turned from the window to regard the pair seated next to him. Leaning forward, he addressed Pacey as if Joey couldn't hear him. "I thought you said she'd grown up to play nice?"

The question elicited the Potter eye roll as Joey huffed out a breath and slumped back against the seat, her arms firmly protecting the place where her heart resided.

Surprised at Joey's outburst after the relative peace of the last hour, Pacey reminded him dryly, "I said, _most of the time."_

Further discussion was thwarted by Dawson's decision to stop outside a small diner. Oblivious to the continuing tension simmering between Pacey and Joey, he brightly asked, "Who's hungry?"

*~*

Joey had recovered her excitement to see Aunt Gwen while firmly ensconced at Dawson's side during their meal. She _loved _Aunt Gwen. She refused to allow Pacey's presence to ruin her visit with a woman she could gladly emulate.

Back on the road, Joey slid down resting her head against the back of the seat, determined to enjoy the rest of the ride in anticipation of the end of their journey.

*~*

Their lunch break had only served to make Pacey antsy for the actual travelling part of their trip to be over. He leaned against the window unconsciously counting the telephone poles as he had on every vacation with his family as a child. It gave him the opportunity to allow his mind to wander without fear of exposing his facial features.

Pacey had watched Joey visibly relax while they ate and she talked about Aunt Gwen. He wondered if she even realized how Will's comment might apply to them.

"…_isn't it better to have a short time with somebody that you really love, than a lifetime with somebody who's basically a roommate?"_

Who was he kidding?

Joey occupied a permanent residence on that river in Egypt.

She could fly through an algebra problem, score 800 on the SAT in every subject, paint a mural that actually had depth and significance but Pacey was convinced she wouldn't get that metaphor if he'd drawn it in stick figures for her.

Despite his steadfast belief in proximity, maybe this hadn't been a good idea? Maybe he and Will should have stayed in Capeside?

Suddenly, he felt a sharp jab in his side and, before he could turn his head to protest Joey's assault, he realized from the soft snore she exhaled that she had slumped against him, fast asleep.

Carefully, he shifted until she was settled against his shoulder; her head tipped sideways, her hair tickling his arm.

She smelled so good. Not sickeningly sweet like most girls. No, she smelled like fresh laundry on the line and apples in the fall and something else that was indescribably delectable.

Something he desperately wanted to taste… again.

He looked up to see Will watching them and shrugged his eyebrows.

"Oh, you meant she played nice _while she was sleeping_," Will whispered.

Pacey couldn't help but grin. "Somethin' like that."

He gazed down at the quiescent girl, so vulnerable, so trusting and felt his heart overflow with love, unrestrained.

No matter what other trials or misgivings this trip may hold, Joey Potter sleeping on his shoulder in that moment made the entire journey worthwhile.

*~*

**Trip on Love**** by Abra Moore **

I let my guard down  
In a momentary lapse of emotion  
And it just slipped out  
That we both knew my heart could be broke

I said something I never intended to say  
You stopped laughing  
And asked me, "do you feel alone in that way"

Do you trip on love  
Do you run from magic  
When you kiss someone  
Do you make it tragic  
If you feel too much  
Do you start to panic  
When your word comes out  
Do you trip on love

I just stood there  
Had expected another reaction  
Out of thin air  
In the strangest sense of satisfaction  
Can you tell me  
How you see me somewhere  
And if you held me  
Would you let me see a part of yourself

Do you trip on love  
Do you run from magic  
When you kiss someone  
Do you make it tragic  
When you feel too much  
Do you start to panic  
When your word comes out  
Do you trip on love

When we go  
Do we say  
This means less than we know it does  
Please tell me

Do you trip on love  
Do you run from magic  
When you kiss someone  
Do you make it tragic  
When you feel too much  
Do you start to panic  
When your word comes out  
Do you trip on love

When your word comes out do you trip on love

Don't you wanna love me no more  
That is why I love you so much  
That is why I hate you so much

*~*


	25. Make Room

A/N: Hey everyone! We're pretty excited about this ficlet as it looks at a very important scene in the **Stolen Kisses** epi. Hope you like it, too! We know a couple of you wanted to see this missing scene in particular so we hope we've done it justice for ya! Oh, and we highly recommend you go to YouTube and listen along to the song as you read. Not only is it a beautiful melody but one we think fits perfectly with how Joey is feeling right now. As always, please do let us know what you think, whether you love or hate it. We want to know. And if you're shy, feel free to PM us offline – or, if you're more creative, send us smoke signals, Morse code, messenger pigeons… you get the picture, LOL! We just want to hear your thoughts, please. Thanks to all those who gave feedback/kudos last time.

************Make Room************

**Can't Take It In** **by Imogen Heap**

Can't close my eyes  
They're wide awake  
Every hair on my body  
Has got a thing for this place  
Oh empty my heart  
I've got to make room for this feeling  
So much bigger than me

It couldn't be any more beautiful  
- I can't take it in

Weightless in love... unraveling  
For all that's to come  
And all that's ever been  
We're back to the board  
With every shade under the sun  
Let's make it a good one

It couldn't be any more beautiful  
- I can't take it in

**********

"_Snnnnkkkkkxxxx!…_"

A particularly loud note in the _Symphony of Sleepers_ being played out at my feet causes me to cringe. And I thought Pacey was a loud breather in the car! His soft exhales behind me are barely discernible compared to the racket coming from the floor.

I silently sigh, frustrated that I can't simply tune out the noise and go to sleep. I never had this much trouble with sleepovers at Dawson's. Even at the height of my crush, when you'd think I would stay awake for hours on end just to hear Dawson breathe, as soon as my head hit the pillow – bang – I went straight to sleep.

Right now I'm not even sleepy. But then again, how _can_ I sleep when my mind is racing?

And I fully blame my current bed partner. This is entirely his fault!

Trust Pacey to irritate me even when I'm trying to sleep!

I roll my eyes as another thunderous snore echoes across the room, determining from the slight feminine lilt at the end that the owner is Andie. She must have a sinus infection or something because I don't remember her making this much noise when we slept over at Jen's. She seemed perfectly fine earlier but now her nose sounds stuffy and she's breathing loudly through her mouth. Every so often she gasps and sucks oxygen in as if to keep from drowning in phlegm.

Lovely.

Will doesn't seem to have the same nasal issues yet he is just as noisy. Despite his quiet demeanor, the boy tosses and turns and murmurs so much that you'd be forgiven for thinking he was awake.

At the thought of Will, my lips lift under their own volition as one particular image of a much younger, spotty-faced Will washes over me. The one where he and Pacey were pedaling round and round me on their bikes, trying to scare me by circling ever closer and closer. But I stood my ground on that bright, summer day; my head tossed back as I dared them with a slitted glare. Pacey kept up a steady stream of taunting until he realized I wasn't going to budge. Then he signaled Will to ride off with him rather than run over my toes.

My victory was tinged with relief. Another game of chicken with the master played and won.

It wasn't always so.

Pacey. Hmmm… He was a mass of contradictions even back then. He would defend me from abuse at the hands of other cretins on the playground as if _he_ were the only one permitted to orchestrate or execute my torture. So it was no surprise I vacillated between wanting to kill him violently and merely offing him quietly in his sleep.

After Will's family moved to Raleigh, Pacey began to spend even more time at the Leery's, much to my dismay. I wonder how different things would have been if Will stayed? How the dynamics of our little group would have changed?

It feels like a lifetime ago now when the three of us slept over together after movie night. I didn't question it at the time, but Dawson never let Pacey sleep in the bed with us. He'd haul his sleeping bag out of the _Orca, _otherwise known as his closet, leaving Pacey to bunk on the floor grumbling about the Princess and the Pea - always pausing then to add _brain, _which never failed to crack him up. Dawson seemed oblivious to the burn and I snickered to myself at his clever way with an insult. And, if I'm honest, I was also just the tiniest bit thrilled at being the Princess in that scenario though I would never have relinquished my position as "one of the boys" at the time.

However, _none_ of my fond memories included the sounds now emanating from one Dawson Leery. When the hell did he start snoring?! Seriously, come on! How does he not wake himself up? Our overnighters would have ceased _much_ sooner if I'd had to listen to this din every Saturday night, that's for sure. From an audible exhale to the classic sound of sawing lumber, Dawson is covering the spectrum.

Annoyingly though, neither the cacophony nor these ruminations serve to distract me from the solid presence of Pacey behind me. His soft exhalations only indicate that he is completely conscious. I have no doubt if he'd slipped into dreamland, he'd be making just as much noise as the rest of our bunkmates.

I suddenly realize that, without thinking, somehow my breathing pattern has fallen in time with his and we are breathing as one. Startled, embarrassed as to whether he's noticed this as well, I immediately fake a sleepy cough and alter my rhythm.

Another thing I realize is that I'm incredibly hot. I shift slightly, barely moving to better allow the air from the room to cool my face and neck. This damn robe is too warm. I'm completely dressed in pajama pants and a cami beneath it. That's a lot more clothes than Pacey's seen me in on the beach every summer. Or in the hallway outside my bathroom, for that matter.

What was I thinking?

Even though it's rhetorical, the voice in my head provides me with an answer that has something to do with the look on Pacey's face that morning when his eyes finally met mine. And how I felt naked even wearing a towel.

Which is why I'm wearing everything I can get away with now.

Funny, though, how I still feel undressed even with all these layers. And how sometimes I can feel completely exposed when he gives me that look, as though seeking answers from me, answers I know I can't give.

Mentally shaking my head to clear my thoughts, it seems that even though I may feel naked, my body temperature is telling me otherwise. Not only am I cocooned in my terrycloth prison, Pacey is hot.

His body is like a furnace radiating heat against my back.

I played tug-of-war with the blanket but the victory is pointless because I'm definitely warm enough.

Did I know this about him?

I try to remember moments in the last few months when we touched.

Moments other than that one at the side of the road. _The one where his mouth was like liquid fire._

Whose voice is that in my head anyway?

_The hug at the end of the dock… in the car at Mayfield… boarding his boat for the first time… dancing at the Starlight… a thousand small touches, hip checks and shoulder bumps…_

My memory is filled with those touches and his skin is always warm, so warm.

And there's a nervous itch inside me that longs to not only shed this robe but then roll over into his firm form seeking… what exactly?

Comfort?

Heat?

Answers?

But I don't, of course. I lie here rigid, afraid to move and touch him inadvertently.

_Because once I do, I'll never stop._

Again, that voice! God, maybe _I_ should have been the one to go to Mayfield instead of Andie.

I stop my breathing momentarily to focus on his. He's preternaturally still. I know he's awake. What in the world is he thinking?

I close my eyes against the dim shadows of the room moving and morphing into forbidding claws as the tree branches outside sway in the night breeze. I'm not afraid. After all, I'm in the same room with enough teenage angst to scare off any boogeyman. But the view on the back of my eyelids gives my thoughts the opportunity to wander at will without distraction.

What if…

Pacey and I weren't _just_ friends?

What if…

Pacey and I kissed again?

What if…

Everything else in our world remained the same and we explored this… thing, this… well, I don't know what to call it. All I know is I've never felt this way before. About anyone. It's hard to describe what it is that seems to have flared up between us.

It's passionate.

It's thrilling.

It's terrifying.

I lick my lips and abandon myself to the memory of _that_ kiss.

The one that has lain just below all conscious thought ever since it occurred.

The one that constantly invades my dreams.

Long fingers burrowing into my hair, soft lips exploring mine. His hot mouth pulsing with life, generously giving me everything then accepting what I offered in return with reverence and joy.

Twinges of electricthrills coil up from between my thighs, both shocking and exciting me, and I feel the hard nubs of my breasts press against the thin fabric of my cami. I squeeze my legs together, suppressing a hiss, almost embarrassed at the sensitivity there and will myself to stop remembering.

Enough! I scold myself.

The risk involved in indulging that lustful fantasy in my head - and in my life - seems too great.

Besides, Pacey seems to have recovered from his temporary lapse into insanity and, judging by the recent rancor in our relationship, we've returned to our regularly scheduled programming.

Right?

Although he didn't seem to mind when I slept on his shoulder in the car.

A different kind of heat blooms across my cheeks as I think back to our arrival here. I had startled awake and it took me a moment to get my bearings. Realizing that the cushion that had been comfortably supporting my weight since our lunch stop was _just my friend_ – the one with whom I felt an unreasonable irritation – I sat up quickly to correct my untoward position. A thin, silver line of drool connected the corner of my mouth with Pacey's shirt sleeve. Yet his only acknowledgment was to silently hand me a napkin from the console, accompanied by – as was becoming a habit lately - one of those unfathomable _looks_. Unable to bear the intensity I wiped my mouth, effectively and totally separating from him and then scrambled out the door behind Will.

Since then our verbal volleys had indeed consisted of monosyllabic grunts and glances that swiftly slide away from each other.

If this was a sitcom, I'm sure this predicament would be fodder for hilarity. But this isn't a sitcom and, although Pacey didn't seem particularly bothered _or_ thrilled by our sleeping arrangements, he did seem concerned by how I would react.

And he _did_ try to fix it for me.

Maybe sleeping with me doesn't affect him the way it seems to be affecting me?

Maybe the kiss really _was_ no big deal to him?

Maybe all my dithering anguish is for naught?

Or maybe I should just go to sleep and pray I don't, in a room filled with my friends, have that recurring dream that causes me to awaken panting with unfulfilled desire pounding through my veins.

Sleep seems far but I'm determined; and I have an idea.

Reaching back into the most treasured memory box of my mind, I picture the copy of _Little Women_ that my mother always read to me at night. Worn binding, uneven page edges yellowed with age, she carefully held the book so I could see and began, "_Chapter one. Playing Pilgrims. 'Christmas won't be Christmas without any presents,' grumbled Jo, lying on the rug._"

I continue to mentally recite the beloved words to myself allowing their familiar voices to lull me to sleep, taking me back to more certain times.

*~*

"_Pacey, fix this!_" her voice echoes through my mind as I blink at the ceiling.

Fix it? What did she expect me to do? Suggest she share a bed with Dawson? Er, no. Not gonna happen. Not on my watch. Never again, if I have anything to say about it.

Besides, I didn't want to fix it. I _wanted_ to spend the night in bed with her, lying next to her - or even better – holding her, touching her, kissing her…

I lied to her. My butt would _love_ to have something to do with her butt, regardless of how her butt felt about the matter.

Then again, that doesn't seem quite appropriate considering that the rest of our little group, including both our exes, lie scattered about the floor.

And then there's the small issue of several steps we've skipped in the mating game. Granted some might deem them small steps – but they seem kinda crucial.

Such as, it might be argued by some that it would be a good thing if we were actually _in_ a romantic relationship. That established, we might go on a date or two. After that, perhaps a couple of make-out sessions on the _True Love_ or the back of the cruiser, depending on the season. All of which could potentially put us further along the road to sharing a bed.

Yeah, we missed some sizeable steps there.

Not to mention that after Andie, I vowed not to make the mistake of jumping into the sack with my next girlfriend too soon.

And yet here we are.

Assuming all those steps had been taken, this was still not quite what I envisioned for our first time.

That first time tends to be a bit fuzzy in my mind, the details such as where and when quite flexible; but who and what are set in stone and have run the gamut of scenarios in my imagination. And they all feature miles of soft skin, thick chocolate hair and sweet plump lips, prone to sass but delicious when silenced – preferably where my lips are doing said silencing. Or my tongue. Again, I'm flexible.

Tender kisses and tangled tongues enflaming us to tentative touches until we're peeling off layers of clothing and…

I bite down hard on my lower lip as my body begins to respond to the path my thoughts have taken and I rein in my imagination and will myself to stand down. The very last thing I need is Joey Potter's delicate sensibilities offended by the Witter wares in all their glory.

Of course, I haven't seen anything but the back of her since we got in this bed so the chances of that seem slim. She's wearing her robe as if it's armor. Sheesh! I've seen her in less at the beach every summer. Or, more recently, in her hallway… where a droplet of water trickled down her neck and… right, okay, stopping _that_ train of thought there because that's obviously not going to help my solider stand down, now is it?

I swiftly retreat to safer mental waters. Perhaps wearing armor to bed could be a habit stemming from her sleepovers at Dawson's? I know she used to sleep in her jeans or shorts; I always wondered at how uncomfortable that must be. The nights I stayed and she wasn't there, Dawson and I would strip to our boxers for bed. Neither of us did that though when she stayed over.

After I started to figure out the difference between boys and girls, I would sneak up onto my knees and peer at their sleeping forms to seek ammunition for my teasing arsenal by checking to see if they were touching.

But they never were.

She was curled up on her side with her back to him, much like she is right now, and Dawson curled up in the opposite direction, neither moving at all.

It's hard for me to imagine them as a couple; they seem so… fraternal. Not that I want to imagine it. Truthfully, even the thought itself makes me slightly nauseous.

I move slightly and listen to see if I can tell whether she's sleeping. I don't think so, as her breathing is very quiet. Not at all like it was in the car when she made all sorts of endearing sleep noises, including a soft snore or two. No, I'd venture to say she's just as wide awake as I am.

I wonder what she's thinking about?

On the other hand, I'm not sure I really want to know. What if she's thinking about reconnecting with Dawson on this trip down memory lane?

He didn't even know she'd broken up with AJ. Now that I've had time to think about it, I wish I hadn't told him. He didn't seem surprised, just… smug. As if it was a foregone conclusion that she'd never have a relationship that would last because she's destined to come back to him.

But what if she made a stopover at me? Would that be so bad?

My first attempt to defuse the bomb that is Dawson failed. Did failure stop Keanu Reeves? Did he just jump off the bus and let it blow up with Sandra Bullock on board?

No!

He kept trying. He didn't give up!

What if I went to Dawson and made my case? Follow through this time, unlike at our camping trip. He, of all people, should understand what it's like to fall for Joey Potter; surely, he'd understand? Defusing a bomb wasn't _that _complicated if you just understood how it was put together.

Of course, that bus _wanted _to be saved from the bomb.

The bus that is Joey seems to have filed away our kiss under "odd and unusual occurrences" of our junior year and seems determined to reestablish the status quo of the Three Musketeers as if it never happened. In fact, this bus is more like a fairground carousel, forever going round and round in circles instead of moving in a linear, forward direction.

I can't go back there though.

I won't.

I can't forget the feel of her lips on mine, the touch of her hair under my fingers, the smooth skin of her cheeks. I replay it in my mind over and over with the accompanying flip-flop of my stomach when I realized she was clutching at me and kissing me back, her mouth molten under mine.

No, I won't forget.

I don't want to.

I fold my arm behind my head, careful not to move too much and jostle the mattress. If she's sleeping I don't want to wake her; if she's awake I don't want her to kick my ass when she misinterprets any movement on my part.

So whether or not the bus cares about defusing the bomb, I need to take a crack at it one more time, I think. We've got all week here. We're on vacation. There's no stress. Surely they'll be an opportunity for me to at least let Dawson know that I've developed these feelings for Joey?

It's the right thing to do.

And once that's out in the open, maybe Joey and I can revisit those feelings from the side of the road and get a different outcome.

I congratulate myself on a well-laid plan to _fix_ everything and finally drift off as I watch the rhythmic sway of the tree's shadows on the walls.

*~*

Bright morning light had erased those shadows by the time Pacey woke. He blinked for a moment until the memory of where and with whom he was came flooding back. Joey still lay with her back to him and he couldn't see that her eyes were wide open.

She had heard their companions quietly stumble out of the room toward the smell of coffee some time ago but was unwilling to relinquish her place next to Pacey as she was sure that they'd never be in this kind of situation again.

She wasn't even sure what she was waiting for. Did she imagine that they would lazily stretch and reach for each other, snuggling and kissing, their bodies pressed flush together?

Fat chance.

They had managed to keep from making any physical contact all night long; it was unlikely that there would any touching this morning.

And that pesky little issue of just being friends and not lovers sort of precluded those types of activities.

Curious, Pacey's weight shifted as he sat up and carefully peered over her. He wondered if she was awake and, if so, why exactly she was still in bed with him.

Heart pounding, Joey immediately closed her eyes when she felt the mattress dip as he moved. Once again, she could feel the heat from his body as it travelled the short distance between them, the sensation growing as he drew nearer.

Her blue terry cloth robe had slipped off one shoulder and he stifled the urge to run his fingertips over the bare skin. Holding his breath, he debated.

Startled then by Aunt Gwen's wakeup call, Pacey's arm accidentally brushed against her as he arched back in an exaggerated yawn.

A high-voltage surge from that small touch galvanized Joey to stir even as it riveted her attention and stole her breath.

Awkward looks and ducked heads were on the menu for morning greetings. In silence, Joey tightened the belt of her robe and made her way into the kitchen, mentally filing that vibrant feeling for later examination.

Pacey watched her back as she shuffled in front of him, resolved to put his plan into action soon - completely unaware that a mere brush of his arm had set off something more explosive than a bomb.

*~*


	26. Illusion

A/N: Hey there fellow P/Jo'ers! Once again we are revisiting the **Stolen Kisses** epi. Don't know about you guys, but we were confused, surprised (and definitely not attracted) by Dawson's seemingly 180 degree turn around with regard to his sudden feelings for Joey and wanting her back. You agree, it did kinda come out of nowhere, right? Hence, this short ficlet takes a stab at what he must have been thinking right about now. Don't worry; we haven't forgotten about Pacey and Joey and that second, all important kiss. Not even possible, LOL Next time we promise! As always, we deeply appreciate all your comments and feedback - so, please, keep 'em coming! Special shout out to: **pippiboo, CindyClinlou555, ckoder, nightshadowlife, Seersha, cleanslate, shudawg61, VampSass **and** kaaitlinanne**

*~* **Illusion** *~*  
**by M&M Works**

The living room was deserted, the karaoke machine long abandoned; Dawson sat on the edge of the couch, elbows on his knees, staring at the "stage" in front of him. He couldn't help but smile as he envisioned Joey's grin while they sang together earlier. She had seemed to be genuinely enjoying herself, caught up in the moment as much as he was. Not surprising really, for that song held a special meaning for them. You could almost call it "their" song; the one they sang every time they came here. So it was only fitting that they sing it for old time's sake on what would be their last visit here, now that the house was being sold. Despite his initial chagrin at spending Spring Break with his aunt, something about being here with Joey felt completely… right.

As a matter of fact, events of the last few weeks seemed to portend an upswing in the course of their relationship.

Camping with Pacey had filled him with nostalgia but also reminded him of the one thing in his life that had not lost its luster – his friendships.

Though his best friend had been busy this year restoring his boat, helping at the B&B and watching out for Joey, Dawson did not feel the drift between them that he'd felt with Joey. He knew that what he'd said was true - Pacey was pure loyalty; he'd do anything for a friend. That's why, when Pacey told him in passing at lunch recently that Joey and AJ had broken up, he knew he could count on Pacey to lend her a shoulder if she should need one.

Of course, if he hadn't pushed Joey away, it would be _his_ shoulder she'd lean on.

But Dawson knew that their separation was crucial to the survival of their relationship. They had both grown and matured and healed over the course of the previous months. Now the time they spent together, however limited, was easy and harkened back to a time when they really _did_ make sense of each other's lives.

Leaning back, Dawson shifted sideways on the couch and stretched his legs out, wondering where everyone had gone. He could hear his aunt puttering around in the kitchen, humming under her breath. He always considered his mother, despite her human failings, to be a wise woman but Aunt Gwen certainly knew how to get to the heart of the matter. Her pointed questions brought clarity to his issues.

_Why aren't the two of you together now?_

_What's your one thing? Okay, close your eyes… now, paint your future. What do you see?_

Dawson wasn't sure he had a suitable answer to either of those queries.

Why _weren't_ he and Joey together now? The brunette from across the creek was, in the end, the key to the second question – his muse, his conscience, his inspiration.

His soul mate.

Maybe it was time to return to his rightful place at her side? Though she'd said he was still an eternal optimist, he didn't see that as a negative thing and, furthermore, couldn't imagine how she could either.

She had acknowledged that he was different now.

She admired him.

Maybe not in blatant gestures or words but there was no denying the subtext of their chat. Yes, their discussion in the barn proved to him that it was finally time to move forward into a new phase of their relationship.

They were ready for a more mature romance this time, one born of years of trauma and heartache but built on that firm foundation of faith he'd mentioned.

Yes, this time they'd really make it. _This_ time the ties connecting them would be too strong to break.

Of course! _That's_ what she had wanted to talk about just now when Aunt Gwen had interrupted them! She had sought him out to discuss their earlier conversation! She felt the same way he did!

Sitting straight up, as if hit by a bolt of lightning, Dawson strained to hear some sign of her in the house. His aunt had vacated the kitchen some time ago and he thought he had seen Will and Andie on the porch earlier. Detecting no voices inside, he craned his neck to look out the front window, searching for any signs of life there.

Where was she?

Thinking quickly, he debated. Should he seek her out now? Let her finish the thought she had started? He wondered if she was waiting for him somewhere in the house or yard. He could picture her sitting in the hayloft, running her fingers over the carving of their names, hoping he'd come to find her.

But his inner artist hesitated. No, he didn't want to rush this conversation; probably the most important one of their lives yet. The setting and ambiance had to be just perfect. After all, he was _a very talented young man with a rich and powerful imagination_.

He would sweep Joey off her feet with a grand gesture that would show her just how he felt about her, and she would be so impressed that any reservations she might still be harboring toward their reunion would come tumbling down. He smiled, remembering the look on her face that time he'd built her that white picket fence; how happy and surprised she had been. Yes, a grand, romantic gesture was definitely the way to go.

It really was time to lay the past to rest and embrace the future… together.

Dreamy-eyed, he painted this future in his mind, picturing the fade out of a scene he had yet to write.

*~*

**What A Fool Believes**

He came from somewhere back in her long ago  
The sentimental fool don't see  
Tryin' hard to recreate  
What had yet to be created once in her life

She musters a smile  
For his nostalgic tale  
Never coming near what he wanted to say  
Only to realize  
It never really was

She had a place in his life  
He never made her think twice  
As he rises to her apology  
Anybody else would surely know  
He's watching her go

But what a fool believes he sees  
No wise man has the power to reason away  
What seems to be  
Is always better than nothing  
And nothing at all keeps sending him...

Somewhere back in her long ago  
Where he can still believe there's a place in her life  
Someday, somewhere, she will return

She had a place in his life  
He never made her think twice  
As he rises to her apology  
Anybody else would surely know  
He's watching her go

But what a fool believes he sees  
No wise man has the power to reason away  
What seems to be  
Is always better than nothing  
There's nothing at all  
But what a fool believes he sees...

*~*


	27. No Going Back

A/N: So, you know the drill by now… we are shamelessly milking the **Stolen Kisses** epi, and this week is no different ;) As promised, it's time to look at that all important second kiss. We've teased you long enough and won't keep you in suspense any longer, so on with the show…

Thank you so much for your continuing support and feedback! Special shout out to the following lovely people – **cleanslate**, **Saltpeanuts**, **nightshadowlife**, **pippiboo** and **ckoder**

*~* **No Going Back ***~*  
**by M&M Works**

_Cheer up, Sleepy Jean  
Oh, what can it mean  
To a daydream believer  
And a homecoming queen?_

Joey's radiant smile and happy glow, brought about from the nostalgia of singing a childhood song, quickly evaporated as she watched Pacey's pained expression and consequent exit from their makeshift karaoke club aka the living room.

_Tick…_

She stumbled over the next lyric, glancing at Dawson to see if he'd noticed, only to find him staring intently at the song book laid open on the ottoman in front of them. She couldn't decide whether she was irritated that he seemed to have forgotten the words to a song they'd sung only a hundred times before or thankful, this once, for his oblivion.

_Tick…_

For the rest of their number, her eyes remained glued to the door willing it to open. But Pacey did not reappear. When the last note faded away Dawson grinned at her, and the remaining audience members applauded as Joey reluctantly accepted their praise with a shy smile. The perky voice of Andie coaxing Aunt Gwen into a solo followed her outside as she took the opportunity to slip away unseen instead of heading to the bathroom as might have been expected.

Squinting as her eyes adjusted to the dark, she eventually spied him sitting not far from the house on the rocker across the yard. She fretted but determinedly made her way over to him, deliberately ignoring that nagging voice in her head telling her to walk faster and hurry up and see if he was okay. More importantly, she ignored the anguish she felt inside and just how alarming her need was to fix things, and _why_ that was the case.

_Tick…_

Instead she was more than happy to convince herself there was no harm in making sure he was okay. Just like a good friend would do.

If she _had_ acknowledged that anguish or that need, she'd have discovered it went far beyond her smoke screen promise to be there for both the boys in her life - this time she had to know that Pacey in particular was okay. That _they_ were okay.

_Tick…_

Something had happened between the time Pacey had entertained the crowd with his rendition of _Wild Thing_ and she had participated with Dawson in an innocent childhood ritual. It didn't escape her notice that he had sung the lyrics, _"I think I love you"_ while piercing her with _that_ look.

_Tick…_

What was he thinking?

Was he trying to say he _loved _her? A small thrill crawled up her spine at the notion. __

Or was that just her imagination assigning _something_ to _nothing_?

She was so confused.

_Tick…_

Shaking her head to clear it and, using both hands to rake her hair back off her face, she travelled the last few steps to reach him feeling the emotions inside her well to those of irritation and frustration.

_Tick…_

Whatever!

_This_… _this_ was weirdness.

He just got up and left.

_Tick…_

Why?

They'd agreed to be friends.

Why was he making this so hard?

Didn't he see? This was the way things had to be.

_Tick…_

At the close up image of his hunched form, a swarm of butterflies took flight somewhere in the vicinity of her solar plexus adding even more chaos to her jumbled emotions.

_Tick…_

"Are you okay?"__

Although she ventured it as a question, her tone lacked the sympathy you'd expect with such a question, making it sound more of a statement – that he _was_ okay, and if he dared to disagree, well, he was damn well _going_ to be okay. He didn't have a choice.

_Tick…_

Because now that she was standing so close to him she suddenly wasn't so sure she really wanted to know whether he was okay - afraid that she'd just set in motion a conversation that would change everything.

_Tick…_

There'd be no going back after this.

_Tick…_

*~*

Wrapped in a blanket of despondency, Pacey's jaw clenched as he made out over the din of the crickets echoing in the night air the sound of approaching footsteps.

_Now what?_

_Tick…_

Joey's slim form appeared in his peripheral vision and he wondered if she'd come to _once again_ remind him that they were _just friends_ and/or chastise him for any perceived weirdness.

If she was determined to torture him, she could have saved herself the trouble of finding him and simply stayed inside with Dawson. His well-laid out plan of action to fix everything, to which he'd fallen asleep the night before, had gone out the window while watching them up there, singing - Joey obviously tickled pink to be sharing this treasured childhood tradition with Dawson one last time.

He'd felt sick.

_Tick…_

What he witnessed was something he could never offer her.

A shared past, and a harmonious one at that.

_Tick…_

His own past with her couldn't have been more different; riddled with punching, pinching, hair-pulling and ridicule. With Dawson, on the other hand, not only did she share a fucking karaoke routine, countless sleepovers after movie night, but they had actually been in a romantic relationship.

No matter how juvenile in substance. It still counted as a shared history.

And, of course, Dawson had been the one who had held her hand when her mother died; while he had hung back, afraid she'd reject any offer of comfort he made, no matter how much it had killed him to watch her grieve.

_Tick…_

He shifted a little in his seat to look up at her, so breathtaking in the filtered moonlight that he had to look away. Then he sighed, ever so slightly shaking his head, as he braced himself for her words. He honestly believed that proximity was a good thing – but, sadly, it could also be a bitch.

_"Are you okay?"_

The retort "_Are ya kidding me?_" crossed his mind at her ridiculous question and he was half tempted to voice them in spite. Of course he wasn't OK! Was she really that daft?

_Tick…_

He wondered again at her motivation in seeking him out as their conversation continued. She persisted in her quest for the root of his problem, albeit asking her questions reluctantly and almost defensively, leaving him to conclude her impetus was more to restore balance to their universe – and quickly at that - rather than any real concern for his state of mind.

_Tick…_

Add to that his suspicion that her desire to resolve their current state of weirdness meant she'd have no qualms in sweeping any awkward feelings under the metaphorical rug, caused him to hesitate in revealing his inner turmoil.

His intense feelings for her couldn't be stifled that easily.

Or maybe his hesitation was that he was afraid if he did reveal them, she'd give him a look of pity and finally state clearly once and for all that his feelings of love were unrequited. And, well, he wasn't sure his battered heart could take much more.

_Tick…_

At this thought, he felt his emotions shift at the unfairness of this all. He didn't ask to fall in love with Joey Potter! He'd been helplessly drawn in, like a river flowing to the ocean; it was only natural.

Losing his inner battle with his frustrations, he resorted to sharp-edged bickering, during which she raised his hopes by insinuating that they needed to have their _own_ history; only to dash them by retracting her assertion in the very next breath.

Standing in front of her, so close he could reach out and touch her, he ached. Literally. But there was nothing on her face but distress.

_Tick…_

Fuck this.

Pacey began to walk away from her rather than damage whatever relationship they were doomed to have or salvage. He wouldn't… he _couldn't_ risk losing her from his life completely.

_Tick…_

~*~

Throughout their conversation, if you could call it that, Joey's emotions had made a complete turnaround. After her initial fear of kick-starting a conversation she wasn't sure she wanted to have, she was now panicked at the thought that she would never get another chance _to_ have it.

_Tick…_

Joey debated briefly, hearing Aunt Gwen's voice in her head, _"Those kinds of feelings just won't be ignored. You know, I owed it to myself to explore them."_

_Tick…_

Letting go of all her fears, she spun around and called after him, "I felt it."

_Tick…_

As if an arrow pinned him in place, Pacey halted his housebound retreat before slowly turning back to face her.

_Tick…_

Just three little words. Much like those other infamous three little words, they held so much power and meaning.

_Tick…_

But he had to make sure he was reading between the lines clearly this time.

_Tick…_

Heart in his mouth, he was surprised that he was able to choke out, "What?"

_Tick…_

Now that she'd removed the breakwall surrounding her heart, Joey found that the words poured out of her. They were crystal clear, if not a little shaky. "This morning… when your arm brushed up against me in bed and… I felt it."

_Tick__…_

Knowing her answer to his next question would be the most important in his life to date, Pacey asked quietly, "How did it feel?"

The quietly ticking bomb that was Joey took a leap of faith and confided, "It made me feel alive."

Utter joy spiked through Pacey, restoring his confidence. The tip of his tongue slid across his bottom lip in preparation of his next move. As if aware that Joey was such a bomb about to explode, he stated his intentions plainly, moving toward her carefully, one step at a time, hands in motion as he talked.

He could only hope that instead of exploding in anger, she'd give over to the passion he knew she held inside her; and then he'd show her just how alive he really could make her feel.

_Tick…_

Her courage depleted by her confession, Joey weakly protested, wavering between flight and anticipation of the rational kiss. The second kiss. Of all the things to pass through her head in that precise moment, the conversation she'd had with Bessie so long ago sprang to mind about such a kiss. The one to which Bessie was partial because it was about something more… something real, something meaningful.

_Tick…_

Oh God, this was really happening.

_Tick…_

Nerve endings tingling, butterflies alight, she waited for _that_ kiss.

_Tick…_

Thick lashes swept up to reveal a swirl of hazel centered in wide white saucers as Pacey murmured, "Ten." His fingers slid along her cheeks so that he could feel her skin and then kept his promise.

_**Ka-boom!**_

With her complete cooperation and participation, Pacey Witter's hands tenderly cupped her face and he sealed his mouth to hers. The lips that she had been dreaming of were but a ghost of the pulsing, warm and living heat that claimed her.

Their world narrowed and time stretched out between them.

If Pacey had known of Bessie's theory about the second kiss, he would have wholeheartedly agreed but in reality he couldn't form a single coherent thought. Joey was breathing life back into his battered heart; her kisses a soothing balm to the pain of the past weeks as they ignited his senses.

Safe in the last place she expected, Joey allowed herself to surrender to the moment as life pulsed through her, transfused from the boy that held her.

There was definitely no going back now.

*~*

**Alive****by Melissa O'Neil**

Stuck in the world  
No longer turning  
Always the girl  
Waiting for something  
Too many days  
Walking around sleeping  
Open my eyes  
I'm tired of dreaming

[Chorus:]  
I wanna run with the reckless emotion  
Find out if love is the size of an ocean  
Even if I crash down, burn out  
At least I'm gonna know what it's like  
To feel alive

Sun on my face  
Lights of the city  
Maybe in love  
Or just learning to be  
On my two feet  
I can only imagine  
I'll say the words  
And believe it will happen

[Chorus:]  
I wanna run with the reckless emotion  
Find out if love is the size of an ocean  
Even if I crash down, burn out  
At least I'm gonna know what it's like  
To feel alive

They think they know me  
But how can they know me  
I'm getting to know myself  
I'm finally ready  
To be somebody  
With a story to tell

[Chorus:]  
I wanna run with the reckless emotion  
Find out if love is the size of an ocean  
Even if I crash down, burn out  
At least I'm gonna know what it's like  
To feel alive

*~*


	28. Standing on the Edge

A/N: So. Ya liked that last kiss, huh? Want another one? What's that…? Was that a "yes, please"…? Well, OK then. Since you asked so nicely, here you go ;)

As always, thank you so, so much for your continuing support and feedback! We love you all. Special shout out to the following: **pippiboo**, **nightshadowlife**, **ckoder**, **CindyCinlou555** and **paceyjoeytruelove**

************ Standing on the Edge **************  
by M&M Works**

Sometime between their untimely discovery by Aunt Gwen and her aborted attempt to talk to Dawson, Joey knew that Pacey had once again left the building. Like a sonar beep constantly scanning for its target, only to come up empty, she knew he wasn't inside the house. Her intuition also told her that, given the choice and the current lack of water nearby, he would always seek out a canopy of stars for a roof.

In search of him, she slipped out the back door and wondered when her compass of Magnetic North had changed to the person of Pacey Witter.

She didn't need to look far but spied him immediately, seated fireside; his hands clasped between his knees, his gaze upon the flames in front of him. And though her step didn't falter, she betrayed her nerves by a tuck of the hair and the brush of a sweaty palm down the side of her jeans.

Stifling an unbidden wild urge to throw herself upon his lap, she judiciously claimed a seat on the roughhewn bench just out of his reach – or maybe just out of temptation - her hands fluttering in subtext.

Pacey tracked her approach in silence; the only emotion he showed was a tired roll of the eyes at the precision with which she chose her seat. His attempt to abate her blatant relapse into skittishness was offered softly, the weariness he felt on the inside transparent in his voice.

Yet Pacey's reassurance of his intentions, or lack thereof, only caused Joey more unease. Her heart lurched and plummeted trying to imagine the notion of never feeling those lips on hers again – because she knew he'd keep his promise; he always did.

He wouldn't kiss her again.

Much like their earlier discussion - the one that had ended in that all important second kiss – this one was no different and followed the pattern of so many conversations in the course of their long relationship; Pacey prodding and challenging her, while she barricaded herself behind a barrage of verbiage.

Standing for emphasis, her face a mask of indignation and mock confusion, she fell into that comfortable place of going on the offensive; bickering with him, determined somehow to make him see the futility of his badgering.

When he finally distilled the issue to its core she did not, as earlier, confess with trembling lip to the emotions that were causing her such turmoil. Instead she jutted that lip against the other and blurted out the exact opposite of what he hoped to hear.

With infinite patience and understanding, Pacey's gaze swept up at her, revealing the clear blue truth in them and emphatically agreed with her.

They both felt awful.

Moments later he was on his feet in frustration, confronting her as she remained trembling but stoic, her pupils awash in a sea of tears, drops of moisture adorning the tips of her lashes.

Unable… unwilling to force her to face her fears, desperate for her volitional surrender to this thing between them, he threw down the gauntlet tenderly but clearly, and once again began to walk away.

And, once again, Joey was left to conquer her fear and make a decision that seemed too urgent, too rushed, too important to make without more time and consideration.

She couldn't do it.

And, yet, a split second later, before he was completely out of reach, she had the answer that he demanded. The incredible feelings he evoked within her were more than a shred; they were a tidal wave, overtaking and flooding her senses entirely. But they were only a part of the impetus that fueled her as her fingers caught his hand.

So much more tangible than ephemeral emotions was the evidence of this boy in her life.

_This_ boy had been stalwart and loyal since he found her crying at the end of her dock.

_This_ boy mended a broken heart by rebuilding a boat named True Love.

_This_ boy let her be who she was but challenged her to want to be more.

_This_ was the boy she couldn't let go.

Breathing his name like a prayer, she faced him and held his hand tighter.

Slowly, he turned back around and fixed his stare to their joined hands, rapidly blinking in disbelief. With an almost negligible shake of the head, he begged her without words to make sure she knew what she was doing; to not do anything else unless she really meant it, really wanted it – and, most importantly, really wanted them. He didn't dare look up to meet her eyes - afraid to hope, breathless with anticipation and trepidation.

She answered his silent plea.

Carefully, she moved toward him, one step at a time, the motion almost dance-like as she rocked her steps together. She tugged on his hand as she drew closer, squeezing it hard until his gaze met hers and then…

She kissed him.

She rose onto her toes and, holding his face captive between her palms mimicking the way he'd kissed her by the roadside, her fingers slid through his brown curls to anchor at the back of his neck; she captured his upper lip between hers and fused their mouths together.

She kissed him.

Once.

Twice.

Thrice.

Until neither was counting the number of times their lips met.

Briefly stunned at the answer in her eyes, Pacey was held immobile by those kisses at first. Then instinct kicked in and he willingly gave himself over to them, and her. He wrapped his arms tightly around her, holding her close as they swayed by the light of the fire.

Lost in the sweetness of Joey's lips, the precariousness of their location hovered at the edge of his perception until he finally whispered against her mouth, "Jo."

Eyes hooded and heavy with desire, like a flower seeking light, she curved forward to continue that which he had interrupted.

A smile ghosted his lips at her look of desire and her unabated ardent kisses, proof of the passion he'd known she held inside her all this time and now had at last been unleashed. Despite his inclination to submit to her, he resisted and tried again a little louder, "Jo!"

Reluctantly, she released her hold on his neck but didn't move from the circle of his arms as she rested her hands on his shoulders. As her heels touched the ground, her brow wrinkled quizzically and she licked her lips, the chill of the night air causing her released pants of breath to be visible.

Her thoughts befuddled by the swirl of excitement inside her, she wondered why he stopped. He had wanted her to kiss him; she was quite sure about that.

So why was he stopping?

She didn't want to stop.

She wanted more. Much more.

The last time he had stopped there had almost been no more kissing. Ever. Of course, they had been interrupted that time… The crystal clear light of realization dawned and her eyes widened in alarm as she looked past him toward the house.

Smoothing his hands down her back, he snaked one arm around her waist and making a half turn, he tugged her away from the circle of firelight.

For once in her life, she didn't argue with him but went along willingly only asking as he guided her, "Where?"

"Somewhere a little more private," Pacey confided, heading for the barn. Once inside he urged her toward the steps to the hayloft, at which point Joey dug in her heels.

"No… wait." Unwilling for their time together to be sullied by any trace or reminder of Dawson, she took the lead, pulling him by the hand through the back door of the barn and into the small stand of woods behind it. "This way."

The woods were as good a place as any to start creating a history of _their_ own.

He quickly caught up with her stride, allowing them to walk side by side. While he ran his thumb over the back of her hand, they picked their way across the forest floor, scuffing up leaves from last fall, releasing a rich earthen scent. Occasionally the crickets' song was interrupted by the small scurrying sounds as they disturbed the indigent fauna. The surrounding trees muffled sounds from the house and the road, fostering the impression that they were cut off from civilization.

By mutual unspoken agreement they stopped at a fallen log, which provided them with a dry, if not cozy, loveseat. Away from the fire the air was cooler but not cold and yet they sat so close together that nothing could come between them.

Joined at shoulder, hip and knee, Pacey shifted slightly to slip his arm around Joey's shoulder, marveling that she automatically leaned into him. He held her against him, stroking her arm, reveling in the freedom to touch her.

He was going to kiss her again. That was a given. Thoroughly, too.

But now that he knew that she felt at least a shred of what he was feeling and that she wouldn't run, he was content for the moment to merely sit and enjoy the reality of her nestled in his arms.

Tipping her face towards his, Joey scanned it with wonder as if really seeing him for the first time. She was giddy with the delight that she had faced her fear and for once listened to heart instead of her head. As a reward for that courage she basked in the safety of Pacey's embrace while overflowing with possibilities inherent in those soaring feelings of love unexplored.

"What now?" she whispered with a smile which reached her eyes and beyond.

More than a little giddy himself, Pacey couldn't stop smiling either. His blue eyes twinkled back at her mischievously. "Wellll…," he drawled dipping his head, "…how about… this?" Gently, he nipped at her lips.

Barely moving, he mouthed, "Or this?" He smoothed his lips across the corner of her mouth.

"Or… this?" Tilting to the side a smidge and releasing her shoulder to bury his fingers in her hair, he nibbled her earlobe, earning him a breathy sigh as Joey's eyes drifted close.

"That c-could work."

"Yeah? And what about… this?" He nuzzled behind that translucent shell, tracing wispy kisses along the smooth skin of her neck until he fastened slightly parted lips at the base of her throat.

"That, t-too." Joey bit her lip to prevent a moan.

Measuring her pulse with the tip of his tongue, he vaguely noted its staccato rhythm then continued his sensate investigation. The path along her jaw to the other ear was just as sweet but the dried salt at the corners of her eyes reminded him of their hard won victory this night. Tenderly he cradled her face and kissed the remnants of her tears away.

A peck on the tip of her nose completed his circuitous explorations. "I'm kinda partial to…. this," he revealed with a husky timber as he molded his mouth to hers once again.

For long minutes, there was nothing but the quiet sighs and muted moans of two new, young lovers as the heat between them flared and flamed.

Eventually, Pacey paused to gauge her reaction only to see her left eyelid lazily peek open at him inquisitively. Her lips pulsing with lifeblood were tempting and still he waited, fingers lazily twisting in the strands of her chocolate tresses.

Having no real idea how much experience Josephine Potter had in the arts of lovemaking, he hesitated to go too fast or ask too much. Left to his own desires he might have ravished her right then and there. But Pacey was a patient man and had accelerated the pace of love beyond even his own comfort zone before.

He had every intention of nurturing _all_ aspects of _this_ relationship.

Eyebrows delicately raised, she grinned and then set her sights on those lips so recently holding her enthralled, closed her eye again and unerringly aimed for and claimed Pacey's warm, wet mouth.

Undone by her determination, Pacey capitulated.

Joey began her own sensory map of all the skin she could reach, even snaking the pink tip of her tongue into his ear, eliciting that groan she was learning to love so much. Her intention was to find each and every way she could to evoke that groan.

Her hands were not still but slid beneath the brown corduroy coat to wrap around his waist. He was warm and solid wherever she touched. God, how had she ever hated that coat?! Now, she loved it.

Despite having kissed _five_ boys now, Joey's prior experiences had been nothing like this. She was a mass of contradictions.

On fire but shivering.

Aching with unfulfilled want but completely satisfied.

Desperate yet utterly secure.

She wanted to devour him, let him devour her or, better yet, come crashing together in cataclysmic collision but wasn't sure how to convey that without tackling him here in the leaves of the forest floor.

She kissed his chin on her way back to the liquid heat that was his mouth, watching him under hooded eyes to gauge her effect.

Eyes shut tight; Pacey clutched a section of her hair and waited in anticipation of her next kiss. She rubbed her slightly parted lips across his in a smooth sensual glide and he could not help but accept her invitation as his tongue lightly traced first the top and then the bottom.

Joey moaned and opened wider, her sweet pink muscle taking the opportunity to come out and play.

Long moments passed while they learned this new dance together.

When they eventually parted, foreheads still touching, they were both breathless, hearts racing but this time toward each other.

Leaning back a little, Pacey tipped his chin at her, "Hey."

Joey caught her bottom lip between her teeth for just an instant before smiling back at him a bit shyly, "Hey yourself."

"So… you think we should, you know, talk?" he wondered, reaching out to tuck her hair behind her ear.

Joey leaned forward to rest her head against his chest so that her response came out somewhat muffled. "Can we… tomorrow?"

"Sure," Pacey nodded, content to ignore the elephant in the forest with them, for the moment. He stroked her head as she snuggled there. "But Jo…"

"Hmmm…?"

"I think we may have a small problem."

Joey looked up at him with a slight frown of consternation. "We do?"

He pursed his lips together and bobbed his head. "By the time we get back inside, I have a feelin' we'll be stuck with the same sleeping arrangements as last night."

"Oh, I'm not worried about that." Joey replied easily, keeping her face straight.

"You're not?"

"Nope."

"And that would be because… tonight your butt doesn't mind my butt?" He asked hopefully.

"Nooooo… _because_ tonight you know where to find the extra blankets to make up the couch." Joey stood pulling him by the hands until he was standing, too.

He slung his arm over her shoulder and complained, whispering a kiss into her hair, "Prude."

Hip checking him, she held onto his belt loop and giggled, "Pervert."

They began walking back toward the house. After a moment, Pacey suddenly protested, "Hey! Wait! Why do you get the bed?" He pushed out his bottom lip in a pout.

"Pacey," Joey expounded with an exaggerated roll of her eyes, as if explaining to a small child, "_Everyone_ knows that it's proper etiquette to let the lady have the bed!"

"Exactly." He waited a comic beat. "So…? Like I said, why do _you_ get the bed?"

Joey dropped her jaw open in mock disbelief. "You better not be implying that I'm _not _a lady, Witter. Because I think you'll find there's plenty of evidence to the contrary. And besides you're the last person to-"

Discovering the newest weapon in his arsenal for winning arguments with Miss Potter, Pacey stopped midstride and scooped her up against him to kiss her soundly, effectively silencing her.

When he set her down, she dazedly asked, "What was I saying?"

Satisfied that he now had the upper hand once more, he slowly began guiding Joey back along the path. Swinging their joined hands he replied mildly, "That you'd be thrilled to share that bed with me tonight."

"You wish. Couch, Pacey."

"Yes, Miss Daisy," he chuckled, breathing out a happy sigh.

As they continued on their way to the house, neither of them knew what would happen next, when that elephant they'd ignored would insistently demand their attention.

But, they could be certain of one thing.

At that moment in time, fingers tightly entwined, neither one felt awful anymore.

**********

**On Fire by Switchfoot**

They tell you where you need to go  
They tell you when you'll need to leave  
They tell you what you need to know  
They tell you who you need to be

But everything inside you knows  
There's more than what you've heard  
There's so much more than empty conversations  
Filled with empty words

And you're on fire  
When he's near you  
You're on fire  
When he speaks  
You're on fire  
Burning at these mysteries

Give me one more time around  
Give me one more chance to see  
Give me everything you are  
Give me one more chance to be... (near you)

Cause everything inside me looks like  
Everything I hate  
You are the hope I have for change  
You are the only chance I'll take

When I'm on fire  
When you're near me  
I'm on fire  
When you speak  
And I'm on fire  
Burning at these mysteries  
These mysteries...

I'm standing on the edge of me [x3]  
I'm standing on the edge of everything I've never been before.  
And I've been standing on the edge of me  
Standing on the edge

And I'm on fire  
When you're near me  
I'm on fire  
When you speak  
(Yea) I'm on fire  
Burning at these mysteries...  
These mysteries...  
These mysteries  
Ah you're the mystery  
You're the mystery

**********


	29. Intentions

A/N: Ya didn't think we were done with the **Stolen Kisses** epi yet, did ya? Fooled you!

As always, thanks so much for your feedback and support – special shout out to **ckoder, cleanslate, CindyCinlou555, Seersha, pippiboo!**

*~* **Intentions ***~*  
**by M&M Works**

A heavy spring shower had effectively disrupted the vacationing group's plans to explore the nearby quarry. The Capesidians had planned a day-long picnic marveling at the watery depths, so unlike the harbor with which they were familiar. Legendary for its submerged construction equipment and enormous, prehistoric-looking fish, the quarry was a local draw with its tiny man-made beach area on the north side; the other rockier, steeper sides of the quarry reserved for the more daring crowd.

But, instead of this new and potentially exciting adventure, they had been stuck inside all day. Playing board games to be exact. Yatzee, Sorry and Clue had yielded winners by luck but the reigning queens of academia, Andie and Joey had persuaded their peers to move onto something more challenging. Much to their surprise, Will had been quietly but consistently winning game after game as they sat at the long farmhouse table; small wooden tiles and their ability to shape them into words deciding their fate.

"Is there such a thing as a Scrabble shark?" Andie protested loudly.

"Who picked this game anyway?" Pacey complained. "We shoulda played Twister!"

Joey smirked, "Right up your alley, Witter. No vocabulary, all action."

Smirking back, Pacey winked at her. "That's right, sweetheart," he drawled with exaggeration.

Andie jumped in. "As long as he can make three-letter words, he has no problem," she stated knowingly.

"Thanks, McPhee," Pacey said dryly as he rolled his eyes. "What is this, _Pick on the Stupid Kid _Day?"

Joey's urge to defend him against his self-deprecation was stifled as Andie rejoined, "If the tiles fit…"

"Your turn, Joey." Dawson elbowed her lightly.

A cloud had passed over Pacey's features when Dawson claimed the seat on the bench next to her but Joey had studiously ignored them both. So he took a seat directly across from her and consoled himself with the view.

Now, watching Dawson touch her, no matter how innocently, made his blood boil. On second thought, Twister was probably a way worse choice than this! Who knows what kind of contortions those two might end up in?

Briefly catching Pacey's eye from under thick lashes, Joey nonchalantly leaned away from Dawson as she tucked her leg underneath herself on the bench. She meticulously surveyed the tiles in front of her, though she knew her word as soon as Will had taken his last turn, but paused as though considering for dramatic effect.

Scrabble was _her_ kind of game.

Choosing six tiles she painstakingly arranged them downwards from the letter B in Will's word "beeves," which itself had caused a ruckus and had been challenged by Dawson. It was almost painful to watch him attempt to seem qualified to compete with the powerhouse trio of Andie, Will and Joey.

"Bezique," she declared smugly, triumph lighting her face. "That's… let's see… triple letter "z" and double word score… 79 points!" She smiled sweetly at Will as he tallied her points onto the score sheet in front of him, smirking back at her good-naturedly.

Dawson frowned, shaking his head in mock sadness. "Joey, you know you can't use proper names!"

Andie and Will both raised their eyebrows at Dawson and said simultaneously, "Proper name?"

"Bezique is the name of a country in South America!" he declared firmly, his blonde hair flopping with a definitive nod of his head.

At that, Joey, Will and Andie burst out laughing. Pacey joined in though he didn't exactly know why; he surmised that Dawson was wrong and he could definitely get on board with that.

"What?" Dawson demanded. "It is!"

When Joey could catch her breath, she gasped out, "That would be _Belize_, Dawson! And it's in _Central America!_" She continued to giggle.

Although he didn't quite get her egghead humor, Pacey's heart was light, watching her enjoy herself. A broad grin split her flushed face; her teeth flashing brightly even as tears of laughter gathered in the corners of her big brown eyes.

"Then what's 'bezique'?" An edge of irritation crept into his voice as the rest of the table continued to chuckle sporadically.

On cue, Andie and Will shouted, "A card game!"

Dawson rolled his eyes and tried to concede gracefully. "Hey! They sound very similar." He swung his legs off the end of the bench and stood. "I don't think anyone can beat Joey now. Let's watch a movie."

Completely dismissing the game and its participants, he made a beeline for the cabinet under the TV.

"Hey! We're not done with _this_ game!" Joey protested. "It's the first time anyone's been close to beating Will all day."

Will stood, too, and tipped his head from side to side, the joints in his spine making an audible pop. "I bow to your obvious genius, Joey. Well played."

Andie followed suit though her stretches looked more like calisthenics.

Pursing her lips indignantly, Joey began to sweep the tiles into the box, "Well then, just for the record, let's not forget – for all intents and purposes - I _did_ win this one!" She looked up to find Pacey's eyes twinkling at her, a smile playing at the corner of his mouth. "What? I _did_!" She insisted.

"Of course you did, Potter. I didn't say anything," he denied. Suppressing his mirth at her tantrum, he folded the board in half and handed it to her.

Placing it on top of the tiles, she replaced the box lid and watched as Andie and Will drifted toward the living room to monitor Dawson's movie choices. For a moment her features were unguarded as she unleashed a brilliant smile in Pacey's direction.

He grinned back, their eyes locked in mutual admiration, shared secrets and impending promises kept.

Dazed as always by his intensity, Joey caught her bottom lip between her teeth and, dipping her head shyly, she set out to return the game to the top closet shelf. Standing on her toes, she balanced one end of the box on the tips of her fingers, the other perched precariously on the edge of the other game boxes.

Before she could give it a good shove, she felt a solid, warm body behind her as Pacey's voice rumbled in her ear, "Need some help, Potter?"

He easily pushed the box into place as she lowered her heels, her slim, straight back and soft, round rear flush against him. Gasping at the feel of him, she feared her knees would give out from his proximity. "_Pacey_!"

Hands in the air, as if in surrender, he stepped back and away from her, shrugging. "Just trying to be helpful, Jo."

She rolled her eyes at him. Shaken, and now feeling bereft of his physical presence, she made her way to the kitchen to lean against the sink, staring unseeing out the window as she turned the faucets on for a cold drink.

What she really needed was a cold shower.

How did he do that to her?

And why did he insist on doing it in front of everyone? She was positive they could all see the way he affected her.

They needed to tell Dawson.

_Before_ participating in PDAs.

And, even then, she feared they would need to be circumspect.

But, for now, she just wanted to cherish these newly discovered feelings for Pacey.

She wasn't ready to share them with the world just yet.

Pacey hovered part way between the kitchen and the living room, watching Joey surreptitiously.

They needed to tell Dawson.

Soon.

He wanted to touch her.

All the time.

Pacey was all for keeping their relationship special and private but he hated sneaking around. He'd hated it when he and Tamara had done it and he hated it now.

A lot.

He didn't want deception and stealth to be part of their history.

The sun chose that moment to streak through the kitchen window, its residual raindrops sparkling like miniature prisms.

Taking a deep breath, Joey turned and announced to no one in particular, "Hey! The rain stopped. I'm gonna go for a walk."

Pacey looked directly at her then and she nodded at him imperceptibly.

Her heart fluttered as she thought of "their special place" as she had come to think of that fallen log and the many kisses they had exchanged there in the last few days. She knew that Pacey would find some way to excuse himself in a few minutes and he would meet her there.

Grabbing her coat from the hook near the door, she was stopped in her tracks by Dawson's voice. "Hang on a minute, Joey. I'll go with you."

Stunned, Joey stared at the back of the boy in the living room who was holding a videotape in his hand and then in wide-eyed panic she wordlessly beseeched Pacey for a lifeline.

Pacey's face did not betray his thoughts but a muscle in his jaw twitched as he casually joined Will and Andie in the living room, refusing to even look her way.

Still speaking, Dawson popped the tape in the player, "I could use some fresh air. And besides, I've seen this about a hundred times. It's not like I'm gonna miss anything."

Smiling, he joined Joey at the door and snatching up his own jacket, shrugged into it. Holding the door open for her, he followed her out into the yard.

In turmoil, Joey walked next to him, wondering to herself why Dawson had to pick now of all times to decide he didn't want to rewatch movies, _especially_ if he'd seen it only a hundred times. As he began to steer them around the barn and into the woods, her turmoil increased as she became horrified at his obvious intended route.

She came to a screeching halt, saying, "Let's go out and walk along the road. It's probably really muddy back there after all the rain."

"Sure, whatever," Dawson agreed easily and veered to the left. They made their way down the driveway to the deserted road in silence.

Though Dawson seemed unfazed by the lack of conversation and cheerfully strode along, Joey was unnerved by her sudden change in companions and resorted to that old standby – the weather. "I love the way the world smells after it rains," she announced.

"Yeah, it smells… fresh," he agreed and then broached the subject he'd been thinking about for days. "Enjoying your vacation, Joey?"

"Um… yeah… of course… why wouldn't I?" she reassured him with a small smile.

Dawson shrugged. "I just thought we'd get more time together to reconnect, you know? It seems like we've been here together but not together - you know what I mean?"

"Hmmm… well, I think it's been a lovely break. Here we are, good friends, sharing our break with other good friends - hanging out, playing games, taking walks – it's been fun." She realized she was not only rambling but she sounded stilted – like a bad movie script – so she shut up.

Desperately, she tried to think of a new subject but all she could think of was the brown-haired boy. Was he angry with her? Did he realize she didn't have a choice but to agree to a walk with Dawson? Surely he understood.

In addition, she was feeling completely out of sorts, knowing that she was missing Pacey's lips on hers; their earlier all-too-brief body contact, while putting the board game away, a cruel tease.

By now the sun had come out fully but the road was wet and the earth was drenched. Careful to sidestep puddles and water-filled potholes, they meandered past other wooden bungalows on the quiet, dead end road.

Despite Joey's private ruminations, Dawson continued tenaciously, "Ever since our talk the other day, I've really wanted to spend some time alone with you and it seems like something always interferes."

"Alone?" Joey's tone was casual and even a bit puzzled.

"Yeah, alone. You know - me, you, a moonlit night…," He trailed off suggestively. "I've been wondering, why _aren't_ we together now?"

Joey began to feel her ire rise. _Now_?

After everything that happened this year, he wanted to try again _now_?

Well, it was too late. He'd turned her over to his best friend who had captured her heart. She'd understood for some time now that what she and Dawson were really good at, was being friends. Nothing more, nothing less.

"Dawson…," she began.

Sensing her hesitation, which he could totally understand after their many missteps, Dawson interrupted her and seemingly changed the subject. "Did you know my aunt painted the picture of her house before she ever saw it?"

Relieved, as if she had somehow dodged a bullet, Joey nodded. "She told me."

"She painted her _future,_" he said emphatically.

Not quite understanding where he was going, Joey nodded again. "I know. Freaky, huh?"

Coming full circle to his original subject matter, Dawson went in for the kill, "Do you know what I see when I close my eyes and paint my future?"

With the dead end looming before them, Joey shook her head but didn't answer his question. She looked at the boy now standing before her, her insides squirming. Taking a shaky breath, she glanced away and proclaimed, "Looks like this is the end of the road. We can't go any further. Let's go back."

Turning on her heel, she headed back the way they had come.

Gazing after her, Dawson stood motionless, frustrated and annoyed.

Joey looked back at him, "You comin'?"

Trying to capture her gaze in a soulful stare but failing as she looked away again, he pursed his lips and started walking until he caught up to her.

Joey began to chatter. "Who knew Will had such a great vocabulary, huh? I thought Andie and I would be the ones to wipe the floor with you guys in Scrabble but he really made me bring my A game. I think if Andie wasn't so interested in him, she'd have played more competitively but she seemed a little distracted today. Don't you think so?"

Dawson sighed heavily and let her ramble until the driveway of the little log cottage came back into sight. A step ahead of her, he pushed through the screen door, letting it slam before she had a chance to catch it.

Joey stared at the door in momentary disbelief until she remembered that this was, after all, Dawson, the boy who was used to always getting his own way.

She still wasn't sure how Pacey felt about being abandoned but if he was angry, she was batting a thousand today, managing to piss off both the boys in her life in one fell swoop. She had gone from being Scrabble Champion to persona non grata in no time flat.

How the hell did that happen?

She desperately wanted to talk to Pacey but knew there was no way to do that right now without raising suspicion. Taking a deep breath to steel herself and, composing her features into a careful mask, she entered the house.

Andie and Will were laughing at the antics of Ferris Bueller but there was no sign of Pacey or Dawson. Just as Joey was about to take off her jacket and join them, she caught sight of those familiar brown curls through the kitchen window.

Leaving Will and Andie to their movie, she moved quietly behind them through the house and, pushing open the back door, found Pacey parked in a wicker chair.

"Hey," she offered, cautiously.

"Hey yourself," he smiled at her. It was a slow smile, one which gradually lit up the whole of his face as the corners of his eyes creased.

Reassured, Joey found herself finally able to breathe again normally. "Ferris couldn't hold your attention?"

"Been there. Done that. Got the t-shirt."

Joey laughed out loud because Pacey did indeed have a t-shirt that read, **Ferris Bueller, you're my hero.**

Pacey then continued, lifting his shoulders in an easy shrug, "Besides, when it comes to skippin' school, in my experience a _boat_ works out better than stealing Daddy's sports car. Although… there's one thing I wouldn't change. The brunette female sidekick." He winked at her. "Nope, definitely wouldn't change that."

And, just like that, he put her at ease. He wasn't Dawson. He wasn't mad. She was gonna have to get used to this; a world in which she didn't have to worry that any wrong look or word might send the boy into a tantrum. She took a seat on the swing opposite him and allowed herself to bask in the familiarity between them.

"Nice walk?" he asked offhandedly, his eyes flicking toward her and then away as he jiggled one leg.

Debating as to how much she really needed to reveal to still make her point, Joey clarified, "_Awkward_ walk."

Pacey nodded in understanding before piercing her with his serious gaze. "We need to tell him, Jo."

"I know. I wanted to but…" she began to rationalize.

Shaking his head, Pacey interrupted, "When we get back. We need to tell him when we get back. I don't think we need to jeopardize the peace and harmony of such a long road trip by telling him now. But as soon as we get back…," he trailed off.

Relieved that Pacey made the decision, Joey nodded firmly. "That's what we'll do then." She paused before asking, "What about Andie?"

"I'll tell her. After we tell Dawson. Just as a courtesy."

His ocean blue eyes searched her face and found it open and trusting. Startled, Pacey realized what a great responsibility it was to love her. She was looking to _him_ to lead them through the treacherous waters ahead.

His heart swelled.

Determined to be worthy of her trust, he promised himself that he would do everything in his power to keep from failing her.

Happy that they now had a plan of action for the future, Joey turned her thoughts back to the here and now. She stole a glance over his head to look inside through the kitchen window before whispering, her voice hopeful, "Do we have time for a… walk?"

Pacey shook his head. "We should go back in before they miss us."

Her face fell in disappointment.

"Why, Josephine Potter, I do believe you're trying to get me alone!" Pacey teased.

Her cheeks blooming, Joey rolled her eyes at him and shook her head in denial. "I don't know what you mean."

"What I mean, _Jo, _is that _you_ can't wait to get some of _this_! He waggled his eyebrows and in his best game show hostess mode pointed to himself from head to toe.

As the blush crept down her neck she snapped back, "Bite me!"

"After dinner," he promised, winking again at her.

As she got to her feet, ready to flounce by him, she shrugged, her tone elusive, "Maybe. Maybe not. I might have other plans."

Suddenly capturing her hand with his long, warm fingers, he gruffly whispered, "Break 'em."

The electrical current, that ran straight from his fingers into the pit of her belly, caused her to pause. She looked deep into his eyes and nodded once, a silent promise.

In that moment she couldn't help but wonder what _else_ she'd be willing to break, to be with this boy.

Standing there just the two of them, her hand in his, far away from Capeside, she found it hard to think of a single thing she wouldn't break.

In fact, all she could imagine was endless possibilities.

*~*

Dawson glanced at the back of the brunette girl's head as she stared out the passenger side window. He hadn't caught more than a glimpse of her face for the last 50 miles. Grimacing, he wondered how his manipulation to get Joey into the front seat for the ride back to Capeside seemed to have gone so awry.

After packing the vehicle, he had capitalized on Andie's attraction to Will by helpfully procuring her some Dramamine for the ride home. Gratefully, and with a conspiratorial wink, she had eagerly taken her place in the middle of the backseat as they prepared to depart. There had then been a flurry of confusion and general chaos as Pacey and Joey worked out their places but Dawson had finally managed to successfully maneuver Joey right where he wanted her.

Apparently all his effort had been wasted.

Though she was seated right next to him, he didn't know exactly _where _her head was because it was obviously not _here._

Maybe he had gotten ahead of himself while trying to make his intentions clear during their walk. In his excitement and impatience to embark on a new phase of their relationship, he had chosen the wrong time and place, that's all. He should have bided his time and stuck with his original idea to set the scene for a grand gesture.

And that's what he would do… as soon as they got home.

Surely then she would see how perfect they were together. Satisfied that he had a handle on the situation, Dawson relaxed and, adjusting the radio volume to mask the silence, then settled in for the remainder of their ride home.

*~*

The scenery outside the window to which she was glued was a mere blur. Joey's body may have been sitting perfectly still, but her thoughts were anything but calm as she sat trapped in a literal and metaphorical triangle.

For, with every mile that they got closer to Capeside, the more uncertain she became; now that they were leaving the cocoon of Aunt Gwen's cabin, what would happen?

Worrying her bottom lip between her teeth, she soothed herself with the mantra that Pacey would know how to fix this and they would do it together.

Successfully.

Just like they had done everything else this year.

Together.

Right?

Desperate for reassurance, Joey whipped her gaze from the passing scenery to the passenger side mirror; catching Pacey's eye, she shared a secret smile with him when he held her stare and winked.

And, once again, as simple as that, he'd put her at ease.

*~*

**Easier To Be by Lifehouse**

Chasing fireflies  
Elusive dreams  
This pre life crisis  
Is killing me  
Beautiful tragedy  
Who I was wasn't me  
Yeah yeah

Do do do do  
You make it easier to be  
Easier to be me  
It's hard to believe  
You make it easy...

We speak in silence  
Words can't break  
It feels like we are  
Falling awake  
In a place and a time  
Of our own  
Yeah yeah

Do do do do  
You make it easier to be  
Easier to be me  
Hard to believe

It felt like the world  
Fell from my feet  
Gave up on myself  
You didn't give up on me  
Let myself go  
You were still there  
Like coming home  
Coming up for air  
Yeah yeah

*~*


	30. Author's Note 021810

**A/N: **TGIF! Oh wait... no it's not. Oh well, you know what we meant LOL! See what writing three fics in one week does to ya?! LOL Sorry guys, but all the sex has worn us out ;) No update this week. With all the recent holiday nookie, we were in serious danger of keeping the nookie theme going and writing a scene with Pacey and Joey doing the deed après Aunt Gwen's. And before you shout, "Hey, that's a good idea!" – _No. _Tsk tsk…We're sticking to canon with this baby and that's that! As always we so appreciate your support with this series. We'll be back as soon as we can. Love, Sherri and Carlie


	31. Author's Note 022710

This is an author's note that I neglected to post last week. I apologize.

Miss Carlie has had a very hard week at work this week past. There was even some talk that there had actually been an extra day added to her week, which we all know is highly improbable but an indication of just how long it felt to her. In my world, as some of you may know, my husband had back surgery last week. Sooooo, I left him in Ohio on Thursday and came to Florida so I could recuperate. (Btw, he's fine!)

The good news is that I'm using my vacation to work hard on the next update. Fingers crossed between the two of us, you'll get an new update next Saturday. Saturday?!! you say. Yes, we're changing our update day to Saturday. So watch this space for the continuing adventures of Pacey and Joey on their way to True Love.

As always, thank you so much for your support of our fic. We love y'all for it.

~Sherri


	32. Author's Note 030710

Hello faithful readers!

Once again, real life has interrupted the writing process of M&M Works. Will you forgive us? You will? Thanks, we appreciate it. And because you are so awesome, here's a little peek at the next update:

* * *

Reaching up to wipe down the top shelf of a cupboard in the cabin of the True Love, Joey squealed as Pacey slid large, warm hands around her from behind. Burying his nose in her hair, he breathed hotly into her ear, "Whatcha doin', Potter?"

"Pacey!" Joey protested but tipped her head to the side, a small sigh escaping her as he accepted her invitation to taste her right _there_.

Pacey's hands spanned Joey's slender waist, his thumb stroking the sliver of soft skin peeking out under the hem of her shirt. "Hmmm…?" he rumbled.

Joey leaned against the solid mass behind her, clutching the arms that enfolded her and reveling in the sensations spiraling from the pit of her belly up her spine. "Hmmm…?" she echoed.

Abandoning all pretense of conversation, Pacey's nibbled the exposed skin of her shoulder where he had managed to nudge the neckline of her top to one side.

* * *

We promise we'll be back with the rest just as soon as we can. :) Thanks for your understanding and patience.


	33. Ad Hominem

A/N: TGI…S. Hmmm… Doesn't have _quite_ the same ring as TGIF, does it? But it's the weekend, that's all that matters! Just to confirm this will be our new regular posting day. Right. At long last - the update for which you've waited so patiently. We can't tell you how much it means to us that you care enough to keep watching this space and actually become disappointed when there's no new update. Thank you! So, here we are at **The Longest Day**, the epi in which it seems a hellmouth really did open in Capeside; the epi that tore asunder our two young lovers on the verge of something wonderful. By the end we were stunned and heartbroken. Let's see if we can make any sense out of this mess. Please let us know what _you_ think because your comments and feedback keep us going!

******** ****Ad Hominem **************  
****by M&M Works**

**Desire by Ryan Adams**

Two hearts fading, like a flower  
And all this waiting, for the power  
For some answer, to this fire  
Sinking slowly  
The water's higher

Desire

With no secrets. No obsession.  
This time I'm speeding with no direction  
Without a reason. What is this fire?  
Burning slowly. My one and only.

Desire

You know me. You know my way in.  
You just can't show me, but God I'm praying,  
That you'll find me, and that you'll see me,  
That you run and never tire.

Desire

*~*

Reaching up to wipe down the top shelf of a cupboard in the cabin of the _True Love_, Joey squealed as Pacey slid large, warm hands around her from behind. Burying his nose in her hair, he breathed hotly into her ear, "Whatcha doin', Potter?"

"Pacey!" Joey protested but tipped her head to the side, a small sigh escaping her as he accepted her invitation to taste her right _there_.

Pacey's hands spanned Joey's slender waist, his thumbs stroking the sliver of soft skin peeking out under the hem of her shirt. "Hmmm…?" he rumbled.

Joey leaned against the solid mass behind her, clutching the arms that enfolded her and reveled in the sensations that spiraled from the pit of her belly up her spine. "Hmmm…?" she echoed.

Abandoning all pretense of their articulate conversation, Pacey nibbled the exposed skin of her shoulder where he had managed to nudge the neckline of her top to one side.

Lost in the flavor of her, Pacey did not hear the familiar voice call out from somewhere above them, "_Ahoy, there!_"

Joey stiffened in his arms. "Pacey!"

He ignored her and continued his tender explorations, his tongue mapping and marking regions as his own.

"_Pacey_!" Joey hissed his name this time, grasping the same arms she had just been clutching and swatting them away from her. "I think I hear Dawson!"

Pacey reluctantly paused in his ministrations and frowned. "Wha…? I didn't hear anythin'. Bit skittish, are ya, Jo?" he teased.

"Anybody here?" This time, Dawson's voice could be distinctly heard floating down the steps.

"Shit!" Pacey spun Joey around to face him and kissing her nose, commanded, "Stay here! I'll get rid of him."

Joey nodded mutely, a mask of worry marring her passion-flushed face.

Moving the few steps toward the stairs, Pacey was flooded with conflicting emotions regarding his new favorite pastime - irritation at being interrupted from it, guilt at having to hide it and shame for wondering just how long Dawson's surprise visit would take before he could get back to it.

Pacey shook his head. He hated this. Not the being with Joey part – no, that he was ecstatic about and wouldn't change. The fact that his other best friend didn't know how happy he was, _that_ he hated.

It was almost funny that Dawson hadn't guessed all on his own that something was up, what with the amount of time he was hanging around recently since they had returned from Spring Break.

Or were they just more aware of how often they had seen him because they had been doing everything in their power to avoid him?

A few days ago, on their way to school, Joey had been so out of sorts after spending the evening before with Dawson that Pacey had insisted that they make a plan and set a date to break the news to him together. Their discussion of when that might be had dissolved into slow, sweet kisses that almost made them late for homeroom. And still nothing definite had been decided about when and where they would break their news.

This really was starting to suck up one side and down the other.

"Pacey?" Dawson called just as Pacey stuck his head out of the hatch.

"Hey, man! What brings you by?" Pacey greeted him as he emerged to find Dawson already on the deck.

"Just on my way to work and thought I'd stop by to see how you're comin' along." He briefly ran his eyes over the glossy woodwork and polished floor. "She looks great!"

Pacey leaned against the half-wall at the top of the steps, arms casually folded, blocking the way into the cabin. "Thanks. She's almost there. I was lucky Bud MacGregor was willing to put her in the water and tow her over here for the cost of fuel."

"Y'taken her out yet?"

"Nun-huh," Pacey shook his head for emphasis. "Maybe Saturday, after the christening."

"Wait… what? You're gonna christen her on Saturday? _This_ Saturday?"

"Yeah, I told you that in school yesterday, D." If he could have inconspicuously rolled his eyes, Pacey would have. Obviously a conversation that didn't directly relate to Dawson, or something he had a vested interest in, was one that he just didn't retain.

With a look of concentration, as if trying to remember, Dawson asked, "What time?"

"Noon."

Dawson nodded decisively. Saturday was shaping up to be a great day. He'd start off the day by supporting his best friend at the christening of his labor of love. He really hadn't had enough time this year to help with too much of the _physical labor_ but he knew Pacey understood. Besides nothing was more important than being there for the _celebration_ of its completion.

Later that night he was planning to wow Joey with a romantic evening that would overcome all her recent reticence toward him. He'd invite her over for a movie and then conveniently "forget" to rent a movie, suggesting a moonlit walk through The Ruins instead. The classical ambiance was just the thing to remind her of a time when it had been good between them; a time before Jack had distracted her the first time and before her drug-dealing felon of a father had ruined their relationship.

Suddenly in a generous mood, he offered, "I'll be there! _And_ I'll bring the champagne."

Pacey, whose attention seemed to have wandered to somewhere near the horizon, jerked his head back toward his best friend. "What? No, man, you don't have to do that! I'll get it." '_Or Doug will_,' he thought to himself.

"No, no… I want to. This is quite an accomplishment and I barely got a chance to help. Let me do this for you."

"Really?" Pacey grinned at him, another twinge of guilt gnawing at his guts. "Thanks, sure then. That'd be great! Y'think your parents would come, too?"

Dawson shrugged, "I can ask 'em."

The two boys stood awkwardly in silence for a moment until Pacey cleared his throat and stood up straight.

"Well, I'm gonna be late if I don't get moving. Catch you later, Pacey," Dawson said as he climbed up onto the dock.

"Bye, Dawson." Pacey lifted a hand in farewell. He deliberately disregarded the undeniable sense of foreboding that clung to him, staring after his friend for a moment as he disappeared down the street.

A sound behind and below him caught his attention and he turned to see Joey's face shining up at him from bottom of the steps.

"Is he gone?" she stage-whispered.

Pacey nodded slowly, his thoughts in a whir, her words only adding to the ominous rumblings in his gut. It wasn't until he saw Joey start to climb up that he shook himself free. "Hang on. I'm comin' back down."

She paused uncertainly mid-step but backed up into the cabin and waited for him, twisting her hair around her finger as she watched him.

At the bottom of the steps, Pacey reached for her but she moved imperceptibly, tucking that hair behind her ear and avoiding his gaze.

Pacey stared at her in consternation. "Jo, he's gone." He pointed behind him. "I saw him walk away. He had to go to work."

"I know… I know. It's not that," she faltered. Grasping her elbows, she leaned back against the counter, lifting a shoulder. Struggling to define her discomfort, she finally said, "I just feel so… icky, hiding down here…," she trailed off, shame staining her cheeks.

The dismay that had colored Pacey's eyes gray, faded to the understanding sky blue of a summer day. "Hey, c'mere." He held out his hand.

Arms still folded defensively, Joey moved toward him until her head tipped forward to rest against the firm wall of his chest.

Gathering her to him, he stroked her back until she relaxed and wound her arms around his midsection. In a low, comforting voice, he reassured her, "We're not doing anything wrong, Jo, but we don't want Dawson to find out this way. We'll tell him, and then if he catches us in the throes of PDA, he won't be surprised."

"Shocked, maybe. Or traumatized," she mumbled into his shirt. Tilting her head back to gaze at his face, she confessed, "It's not just that sneaking around feels icky. It's that… I'm… worried… er… not really worried but… concerned?" She finished uncertainly.

"About Dawson?" Holding her loosely, fingers threaded together across her lower back, Pacey kept her safe without grasping too tightly.

"No. Not just about Dawson. About _all_ of us. That nothing will ever be the same between the three of us. That we're going to lose a precious part of our childhood or something." Sighing, she ducked her head back against him.

Perching his chin atop her head, Pacey closed his eyes and let out a measured breath before he replied quietly, "Aren't you the one who said that growing up sometimes means growing apart?"

The fine silk of her hair bobbed as Joey nodded mutely.

Afraid that any further debate would diminish his point, Pacey soothed his hands up and down her arms and then, crouching until he was eye-level with her, said, "_Icky_, Potter? Really? You've got a… what… 4.0 grade average? _That's_ the best you can do? What happened to that thesaurus in your head, huh?" Pacey rolled his eyes.

Stepping back, Joey punched his upper arm. "Shut up, Pacey."

"Ow! Violent much? Geez, Jo."

"At least I _have _something in my head!"

"Oh, I have something in my head! Come on over here and I'll let you take a peek," he waggled his eyebrows at her.

Joey darted past him and raced up the steps. "No thanks, Witter. I might be blinded by all that empty space!"

Pacey ran after her only to find the deck empty. Startled by her seeming disappearance, his head snapped back and forth searching for any sign of her, going so far as to look up the dock toward the road. Realizing she couldn't have gone far, he shrugged and strolled portside, casually leaning on the railing to gaze across the harbor.

Despite the distant cries of wheeling seagulls and the steady slap of the tide against the hull, he heard Joey creep along the deck behind him from where she had been crouched behind the bulkhead. When she was about a foot away he twisted and, scooping her up in his arms, held her directly over the railing.

"So… y'wanna play, Potter? Let's play 'Walk the Plank'." He grinned maniacally.

"Put me down!" Joey screeched as she wrapped her arms tightly around his neck.

"Oh, I'm gonna put you down, don't you worry!" He leaned forward an inch.

"Paaaaaaaaaaacey! Noooooo!"

"What's that, Jo? With nothing in my head, I really have no idea what you're sayin' now, do I?"

Clinging to his neck, determined that if she was going to get wet that he was, too, Joey made good use of her own new arsenal to distract him; starting with the mole on his neck she licked upward until the tip of her tongue met the shell of his ear.

Her strategy successful, Pacey groaned, "No fair, Potter."

Breathing out just enough to disturb the tiny hairs in his ear, she whispered, "Put me down, Pacey."

Two strides later, Pacey had carried her down the companionway and set her back on the counter; he positioned himself, standing directly between her legs.

Dropping his head to recommence his detailed discovery of Joey's neck, the neck's owner sighed happily. "You know… I can't believe we're christening her this weekend, Pace."

"I'know," Pacey mumbled, pulling back slightly to say in a clearer voice, "Couldn't have done it without ya."

Joey rolled her eyes, still unaccustomed to compliments from him. "I'm almost sad."

Pacey frowned and moved his face up to look her deeply in the eyes. "Sad? How come?"

Joey shrugged, a shy smile on her face. "I don't know. It sounds silly, but I'm going to miss fixing up her."

Pacey's eyes sparkled as he ran his hands up and down her arms. "Yeah, but think of all the fun we'll have takin' her out. Just you and me… the open seas."

Her smile evolved into a grin of possibility. "True."

Pulling her close, Pacey pursed his lips and reluctantly admitted, "As much as I'd _love_ to stay here all day, I should get going. I promised Buzz I'd pick him up soon."

"No," Joey whined, pouting. She dropped her head to his chest, in the same fashion she had earlier, face burrowed deep against his top. "D'ntgwoe. 'tay." She mumbled.

Pacey cocked his head and laughed lightly, trying to decipher her words. "What was that?"

Joey lifted her face and bumped noses with him. "I said… 'Don't' go'." She locked eyes with him. "Stay."

At the vulnerable emotion he saw reflected, Pacey felt his breath catch in his throat. Any earlier foreboding he sensed, vanished, completely forgotten.

One word. Four little letters.

So great its meaning.

He knew she didn't know, but he had planned to anyway; she had no idea for just how long he planned to stay, either.

For, if he had his way he'd remain like this, with her in his arms, for the rest of his life.

It was on the tip of his tongue to tell her that he loved her. It was always implied, but he'd never said the words out loud. He wanted to – _God_, did he want to - yet, he didn't want to scare her away, sensing if he told her now he'd do just that. Besides, with all this Dawson business hanging over their heads, now wasn't the time.

He could wait; she was worth it.

Clearing his throat from the emotion clogging it, he susurrated, "Well, what the lady wants… the lady gets."

And, just like that, they were back where they'd started before they were interrupted, his mouth crashing over hers - no closer to deciding when and where to tell Dawson than they had been.

*~*

"Joey! Can you get that?" Bessie's voice carried down the hallway.

"Can't Bess, I gotta go." Joey snatched her backpack off the table, the phone jangling insistently.

"Jo, please! I'm up to my elbows in laundry suds. Get the phone!"

Huffing out a sigh of impatience, Joey grabbed the handset. "Potter Bed and Breakfast, can I help you?"

"Hi, Joey!"

_Crap._

Every time she turned around!

Of course, Dawson wasn't really behaving any differently than he ever had, but she had a date at the boathouse; a date for which she didn't want to be late. And despite her repeated efforts to talk to Dawson about her and Pacey, she had failed miserably.

Each and every time.

A few nights ago, Joey had spent an uncomfortable evening with Dawson watching **Hook. **Well, technically,she had spent more time watching the clock than the movie. On edge, she waited for the perfect moment to break the news about her relationship with Pacey. And yet, the evening had passed with no real opportunity to blurt out the fact that she had fallen for his best friend.

So, standing here having a casual conversation with him about… _whatever,_ was really low on her list of things to do today.

"Dawson," Joey said hurriedly, glancing at the kitchen clock.

"I was wonder-"

Not sure what he wanted, but absolutely sure she didn't want to hear it, Joey abruptly cut him off, "Hey, Dawson, listen, I gotta go. I'm on my way to, um, to the library to, er, work on that Watergate paper. Can I catch up with you later?"

"Uh… yeah, sure. I'll see you at the christening, okay?"

Joey cringed but nodded, and then realizing he couldn't see her, replied, "Okay. Later, Dawson."

Letting the screen door slam behind her, she shouted, "See ya later, Bessie."

*~*

An unfamiliar twinge of _something _had surged through Joey as she watched Andie and Pacey chatting from the second floor window of the computer lab in the library as they had exchanged unheard words and affectionate smiles.

She had shaken it off as ridiculous. After all, her lips still tingled from Pacey's kisses in the boathouse this morning. She _knew_ how he felt. Now, she even knew how _she _felt.

Andie was part of his past. Pacey was just _that_ kind of guy – the kind that didn't hold a grudge, the kind who stayed friends with his ex, the kind with the big thumping heart.

But now, as she hastened to gather her things, she pondered Andie's confession and couldn't help but wonder just how many people she was going to be responsible for hurting – Dawson? Andie? Pacey?

Even herself.

Because no matter what happened, she was quite sure the relationships between them all would never be the same.

She would be the one caught in the middle. The one to blame. The one to which the fingers pointed.

And despite Jen's reassurance that it was men who wrote the stories of wicked, conniving whores who came between friends, she couldn't change how she felt.

Pacey had become everything to her.

She needed him.

No matter what the cost.

Right?

*~*

Apparently, dropping the champagne bottle would _not_ have been the biggest disaster of the day.

The echo of harsh words rang hollow throughout the room and faded with Joey's exit as Dawson stared at the sheer white curtains fluttering over the open, empty window. The adrenaline that had been pumping throughout his system for most of the afternoon and evening suddenly evaporated leaving him deflated.

His shoulders slumped; he buried his face in his hands, the sting of humiliation burning through his guts like he'd been stabbed.

They had played him for a fool.

All of them.

Jen, Joey and Pacey for sure. He wondered who else knew. Jack, most likely. Although it was obvious that Andie hadn't known. The stricken look on her face testified that they had hidden the truth from her, too.

How long?

How long had they been fooling around behind his back? He'd been replaying the last few months in his mind ever since Jen had inadvertently spilled the beans.

The night the B&B opened? Had it started that far back? Did Joey sneak Pacey into her room after they had all gone to bed and out again in the morning? He imagined that Pacey's offer to _return to regularly scheduled programming_ was just a red herring, contrived to throw him off.

And he had been stupid enough to _thank_ him for watching out for Joey.

Shit, he'd delivered her right into Pacey's sleazy hands.

That didn't explain Joey and AJ though. Hmmm… well, he wouldn't put it past her to be seeing them both. After all, it didn't faze her one little bit to kiss Jack while she'd been with him.

The night of the play, the night he'd found Pacey in the gym and he'd brought up Joey's date with AJ – he wasn't nervous about the play, he was upset about Joey going on that date!

Maybe she was playing them both for a fool.

No wonder she'd been snubbing him; her dance card was full.

Still, Joey had no doubt been sucked in by Pacey and his smooth moves. She wasn't thinking clearly. Because, come on?! A relationship with _him _of all people?! It wasn't so long ago they couldn't stand each other! She went from wanting to "find" herself, to _him_? It didn't make any sense! Which only further proved Joey was fickle at heart. She couldn't help it, swapping her affections over so quickly to the first person who showed an interest.

But _Pacey? _Pacey was his best friend. They were closer than friends even. They were blood brothers!

How could he do this to him?!

Maybe this just was Pacey's idea of some kind of weird revenge for things he'd said carelessly in the past. But surely Pacey knew he didn't mean the things he'd said in the heat of anger or under the influence of alcohol?

Even so, going after _his soulmate_?! That was just one step too far.

Guess Pacey wasn't joking that time about "cutting right in". He'd certainly done that, and then some.

Dawson shook his head wearily, his thoughts going round in circles.

Whatever it was, the end result was the deliberate and purposeful humiliation of Dawson Leery by Joey Potter and Pacey Witter.

How in the world was he going to show his face in public when everyone knew what a fool they'd made of him?

The worst part was that he still wanted Joey. Even after everything she'd done to him.

His Joey.

Dawson and Joey.

Always.

*~*

Pacey watched unseeing as Andie and Will faded back into the night, her words hanging on the night air.

'_How could you be so stupid, Pacey? You know you're gonna get hurt.'_

He didn't _feel_ stupid, although everyone had been telling him all day that he was the one who would end up alone.

Actually, he didn't feel much of anything.

This must be what soldiers feel like when the battle stops. The absence of accusations and assertions left the Leery's yard eerily silent. He vaguely wondered if even the water in the creek had stopped moving; he couldn't hear it.

He couldn't hear anything.

Well, he couldn't hear anything except the loud volley of noise coming through Dawson's window. He couldn't make out any of the words, but then he really wasn't trying to. Anything Joey might have argued in _their_ defense could have been said when she was by his side.

No, their current debate was apparently about _them._

Stunned and still rooted to the spot, Pacey wondered, '_What the hell just happened here?'_

How could a day that had started out with the love of his life in his arms, and his labor of love prepared and christened for her maiden voyage, turn into this nightmare of ugliness?

He didn't know.

That their history together was so fleeting compared to the bond Joey shared with Dawson, he understood. He even understood that she didn't want to hurt Dawson; she'd said it often enough in the last week.

Her loyalty to her friendships – almost to the point of obstinacy - and the purity with which drove her to want to do the right thing was just one of the many things he loved about her. They were what made her Joey Potter.

What he didn't understand was why she let Dawson manipulate her.

Glancing at the open window, he didn't think there was any point to waiting for her. The sounds of the springtime evening came rushing back as he gathered his wits about him. Briefly dropping his glance to his now empty hand, where only moments ago Joey's had been tightly enveloped, he made his way back to the one place that had already helped him heal a broken heart.

*~*

…_This ruins everything! There's no going back…This ruins everything! There's no going back…This ruins everything! There's no going back…This ruins everything! There's no going back…This ruins everything! There's no going back…This ruins everything! There's no going back…This ruins everything! There's no going back…This ruins everything! There's no going back…_

His words played on a continuous loop through Joey's consciousness as she ran down the Leery drive and through town. She randomly thought that a man had obviously written this script and sobbed out an ironic laugh.

Her worst fear had come true.

_She_ had ruined _everything_.

Single-handedly, Joey had wrecked three life-long friendships and devastated Andie.

The boy she couldn't live without was the only boy that her oldest friend was determined she couldn't have.

She couldn't do it.

She couldn't wound Dawson and Andie and Pacey because of her selfish desires.

She wasn't her father.

No, she couldn't do what he'd done. Not that she was cheating on anyone like he had, but the end result would be the same – putting oneself above everyone else and ignoring their pain.

She shook her head decisively; she didn't have it in her to do that.

She didn't want to be that person.

Joey knew that Dawson was being manipulative. She _knew_ him. She understood how he operated. The anger he had spewed at her only revealed how hurt he was.

That's why she had to let Pacey go.

She had to fix things. It was her responsibility.

Pacey had to see that his friendships were more important than she was. Even if he didn't feel that way right now, eventually he'd be grateful that she didn't come between two friends who were closer than brothers.

Right?

She was doing the right thing.

She'd die if he ever looked at her with regret shining back for what he'd had to give up to be with her.

She wasn't worth it.

Dawson was as big a part of Pacey's childhood as he was to her own.

Sometime in the future, when everything was back to normal between the three of them, he would understand.

She had to tell him tonight before any more damage was done because, at this point, she was sure their friendships were salvageable.

They had to be.

And if her heart was breaking, so be it.

*~*

It had become chilly, but the full moon hung brightly in the cloudless sky. Tucking her hands inside her sleeves, Joey wrapped her arms around herself and wandered aimlessly through the streets of Capeside. It occurred to her that she should probably go home. It was late; Bessie would be worried.

But she couldn't bring herself to finalize the day by going home and going to bed; sleep was the very last thing on her mind.

Surely there was a better ending for such a promising day?

Perhaps if she wandered long enough, she'd find it.

Of course, she was delaying the inevitable.

Pacey was gone.

She'd turned around and he was gone, leaving a gaping hole where her heart used to be; his face a mask of devastation at her pronouncement.

Eventually, someday, maybe when their friendships were restored, he'd understand and forgive her.

She had to believe that.

Maybe they'd share a small look – like the one he'd given Andie today in the library - that reminded them of the last few weeks and it would be a warm, happy memory.

But, at the moment, she couldn't imagine that she might ever stop aching for him.

The pain was so raw.

Instinctively, her feet had taken her back to the one place they had shared so much, where she found the little blue boat bobbing slowly in the water.

The vessel before her reflected the effort they had put into it; she really was beautiful.

Suddenly, Joey's stupor was replaced by a maelstrom of emotion. Though she had initially felt conscripted into slave labor, she had come to take as much pride and ownership in its completion as Pacey had the B&B. She hadn't been lying earlier when she confessed she'd miss working on it.

And she desperately wanted to be part of its ultimate purpose. She wanted to sail the small craft.

Snaring her bottom lip, she considered. Obviously, she couldn't take her out by herself. And she wouldn't want to. Fixing her up had been a joint effort; sailing her for her maiden voyage should be, too. She wondered if, after everything that had happened, Pacey would consider taking her for a sail.

Startled by movement on board, she snapped out of her reverie as Pacey's head appeared above the companionway.

Emerging from the cabin, Pacey's heart leapt as he saw Joey standing stationary on the dock, her lower lip still caught between her teeth. He couldn't help but wonder what she was doing there and what it meant.

Had she changed her mind?

Had she resolved to give their relationship a chance?

Had she decided to call Dawson on his bullshit?

Seeing his hopeful face at her unexpected presence, Joey cleared her throat and spoke quietly, "Doesn't mean what you think it means."

His heart sinking, Pacey asked tentatively, "Then what does it mean?"

"Well, it means... that I'm... that I'm returning a favor," Joey stammered.

Lifting his hand in supplication, Pacey's face reflected his confusion.

Joey clarified, taking a deep breath, "You were there for me, that first night at the B&B... you know, the trial run? And I'd... I'd…," She paused to swallow the tears that suddenly threatened to close her throat. "…and I'd really like to join you for the maiden voyage of..." she trailed off, raising her hand to indicate the boat gleaming in the moonlight, unable to utter her name. "If… if you'll have me."

Dropping his head, Pacey laughed bitterly to himself at her choice words – '_if you'll have me_'.

As if _that_ had ever been their issue.

If only _she_ had wanted to _have him_.

But he couldn't deny her anything.

Not now.

Probably not ever.

Besides, he wouldn't want to share the maiden voyage with anyone else.

His voice thick with emotion, Pacey replied huskily, "Yeah."

He held out his hand to help her aboard but she was already over the railing and on the deck.

Joey had stepped on board quickly and sure-footed. She just didn't trust herself to touch him, lest she throw herself into his arms and never let go.

Pacey tipped his head toward the cockpit where she turned on the running lights while he cast off. Together they worked in silence, an efficient team, expertly preparing the boat for sail in unison as though they'd done it countless times. He joined her then, motoring out of the slip until they had cleared the marina. Cutting the engine, they hoisted the sails until the brisk night wind caught and filled them.

Side by side, but careful not to touch each other, they sat; Pacey's hand rested on the tiller as they silently glided across the harbor under a giant moon hanging low in the sky.

Though cool moonlight lit their way, it seemed dim compared to the warm, bright light of the sun. They couldn't see too far ahead nor to their right or their left, but moved forward only by the pull of the wind and the tide.

Onlookers would have been forgiven for thinking that before them was a picture perfect scene - two young lovers, on a romantic sail in calm waters.

For from a distance, if you didn't look close enough, you couldn't see their tear stained faces.

And when a heart breaks, it makes no noise.

*~*

**Just One Day by Better Than Ezra**

If you could change the choices that you made,  
Would you do it - today?  
If you could spin the world the other way,  
Could you do it on faith?  
If time would stand still

What would you do? What would you say?  
If everyone you love came back for just one day?  
How would it feel if every dream came real?  
And all the scars you have fade away  
For just one day

Imagine all the times you that could take back  
What would you have done differently?  
Thoughts in your head you never said  
Or a heart that you broke and left for dead  
If all the pain you had could be released  
How life flies by.

What would you do? What would you say?  
If everyone you love came back for just one day  
How would if feel if every dream came real  
And all the scars you have fade away?

For just one day

And the night  
All the good times and the fights  
All the take and the give  
All the moments that we never got to live  
Ohhh.....

What would you do? What would you say?  
If everyone you love came back for just one day  
How would it feel if every dream came real  
And all the scars you have fade away

[Repeat]

*~*


	34. Shortcuts

**A/N:** Are you thinking what we're thinking? For an episode entitled **Show Me Love**, there sure as heck wasn't a lot of it going around LOL We could have done with actually being _shown_ some love. This collection of missing scenes is our way of working through the fine mess that they've created for themselves. Thank you so much for the best wishes and support – you guys are simply the best!

************Shortcuts**************  
by M&M Works**

Pacey rocked on his heels, nervous energy pulsing through his veins, while he waited on the stone steps outside Capeside High. His head moved rapidly back and forth, scanning the river of students pouring out the double doors and into the yard.

Spring fever ran rampant and spirits were high as the teens prepared to take advantage of the warmer weather and extended daylight. Pacey's mood fell somewhere south of the median line of the general population, though, as he chewed thoughtfully on his cheek waiting to see if he could catch Dawson.

Spying his sandy-haired friend straggling toward the end of the crowd, he called, "_Dawson!_"

Eyes on the steps below as he began his descent, Dawson's head jerked up at the sound of his name and, finding its source, continued to move forward as if he had not heard.

Pacey dropped his head briefly at the snub even though he'd expected no less, his lips lifting with humorless mirth. Then he sighed deeply and jogged after him. Slapping the shoulders of his fellow students in apology as he pushed his way through the mob, he shouted, "Hey, man! Wait!"

A few strides brought him next to the other boy. When Dawson didn't stop but kept on walking, Pacey tried again, "D, can we talk? Please? Just for a minute. That's all I ask."

Dawson abruptly stopped in the yard and turned to face the taller boy. Shaking his head, he sneered, "It's no surprise your grades suck. It seems you're too stupid to get that I _don't want to talk to you_! Not when you came to my house Wednesday. Not when you showed up at the restaurant yesterday. So why would now be any different, huh?! How much more clearly can I spell it out for you, Pacey? Leave me alone."

"Just listen to me for one minute, will you? Sixty seconds. For God's sake, man! Don't you think you owe our friendship that much after all these years?"

"HA! _I_ owe our friendship something? _What_ friendship? The one you betrayed?" Dawson threw his hands up in the air. "Fine. What the hell exactly _is_ it that you want, Pacey?"

Surprised that Dawson was finally willing to listen, even if his body language gave the impression of anything but, Pacey had to take the chance to explain. "I just wanted to tell you that I realize it was a mistake…," he started only to have Dawson interrupt.

"You're damn right you made a mistake! An unforgiveable one. But you know what? I made a mistake, too." He paused to take a breath and shot Pacey a meaningful look. "I trusted you with the one person I treasured most. So shame on me."

The hope Pacey had felt when Dawson acknowledged and admitted he'd made a mistake, too, dissolved - anger and frustration taking its place. He shot back, "Dawson, if you _treasured_ Joey then-"

"Don't you say her name! Don't you dare talk about her! You know what? I have nothing to say to you, and I sure as hell don't want to hear anything you have to say to me!"

With that, he stalked off, leaving Pacey to stare after him, his jaw clenched and his chest rising and falling with jerky movements as he breathed deeply through his nose.

Well, fuck.

That went well.

He was never going to get Joey back, not unless he got Dawson on board with the idea. Because she was determined that no one get hurt.

No one but him, apparently.

Almost two weeks now. That's how long it had been from the night when they'd taken the _True Love_ for her maiden sail. And she hadn't said a word to him since. He'd almost given up eating lunch in the cafeteria, the crack in his heart growing ever wider each time she looked his way only to immediately pretend she hadn't seen him and scurry away.

Yet proximity is as addictive as a drug and he couldn't go without.

He released a bitter laugh and dragged his hand through his hair. He was beginning to wonder _why_ the hell he was trying so damn hard to resolve things and make everything right when he wasn't even sure Joey wanted him in her life anymore. Maybe not even as a friend, for her current absence in his life spoke volumes.

But he had to try to fix things; he couldn't just sit on the sidelines and do nothing.

Of course, his motives weren't entirely selfless. Some things had changed to the point that there was no going back.

He couldn't _just_ be her friend. He couldn't – didn't_ want_ to – go back to the way things were before he'd kissed her. Not anymore. He couldn't watch her cave to Dawson's ridiculous demands; climb out of his arms and up that damned ladder.

It was too painful.

If he could only make his best friend understand that what he and Joey had between them wasn't about _him_ at all, but was something that had just happened; reassure Dawson that he had a role to play in their lives, that they still wanted him as a friend and that wouldn't change. All they needed to do was take a step back and talk it through, calmly, man to man. Once Dawson understood where he was coming from, surely he'd release Joey from his ultimatum? And perhaps then he and Joey could go back to exploring their budding relationship.

If only he had tried harder to tell Dawson when he first realized he was falling for Joey, made him listen that night they went camping.

Hindsight, as they say, was perfect.

Watching Dawson disappear into the distance, he wondered just what the chances were of any of that happening. Right now, it seemed to be somewhere between slim and none.

But, like he said, he had to try. Even if waiting for everything to be resolved was slowly killing him, for sadly there are no shortcuts when rebuilding trust.

Suddenly feeling drained, the earlier adrenaline rush having faded away, he sighed tiredly. He couldn't remember the last time he'd had a good night's sleep. Hearing the town hall bell chiming the hour in the distance, Pacey scrubbed his hand across his face and shook himself into action, heading in the direction of Leery' Fish Fresh. He was due to meet with Gale shortly to finalize the details of his sponsorship of the restaurant in the upcoming Regatta.

If he couldn't talk to Dawson, at least Gale was still willing to give him a chance to put things right. Perhaps if Dawson saw that Pacey was still there for him, and his family, that things didn't have to change, then maybe he'd be willing to talk.

One thing was certain.

If Dawson wanted Pacey to bow out and walk away, then they really _would_ have to talk – Dawson would have to man-up and ask him.

**********

Blue and white flags fluttered in the evening breeze, illuminated by electric pearls of incandescence, as Joey wound her way through the streets of Capeside toward the boardwalk where earlier that day she'd been conscripted for pancake-serving servitude. Now she had again been drafted; this time to return to the scene of the culinary crime to retrieve Bessie's brand new nylon pancake flipper.

She didn't honestly mind, though; the walk gave her time to think and breathe. Time to make sense out of the non-sense that was her life at the moment. Time to breathe without the weight of everyone's eyes on her shoulders, watching and critiquing her every move.

Nothing had gone as she had hoped. She had given up her chance with Pacey to restore order to their small but fragile universe, but that particular goal seemed a distant dream. Attempting to untangle the knotted mess, she tried to arrange the facts in her head much as she organized her homework:

Dawson still maintained a wounded rage toward Pacey.

Dawson was willing to be _friends_ with her but what that meant exactly seemed murky at best.

From what she gleaned from their conversation this morning, Pacey had tried but hadn't made any headway with Dawson.

Despite his willingness to try to make peace with Dawson, Pacey seemed to be taking extraordinary care to stay far, far away from her.

It was the last fact that hurt the most. She'd made the first move when she went to Pacey that night on the _True Love_, hadn't she? Extending the proverbial olive branch of friendship, even if her hand had been shaky and the offer somewhat muddled. Still, the ball was firmly in his court.

Right?

But he hadn't made a move.

Not one.

Which brought her to only one conclusion. Pacey's avoidance meant he didn't want to be around her; that he didn't want her in his life, not even as friends - something she hadn't counted on when she had tried to turn back time.

But if that's the way he felt, the very least she could do was respect his wish. After all the pain she'd caused, she owed him that much. Which was why whenever she saw him, whether it be in the hallway or in the cafeteria, she did her best to be invisible, not wanting to cause him any awkwardness or anymore pain by her presence.

Even if those very actions caused _her_ immense pain.

Sighing heavily, she rounded the corner of the last building on Water Street to cut across the lot toward the boardwalk. When she heard loud, tense voices carry through the clear night air, Joey stopped in her tracks to listen. Her heart beating loudly in her ears, she felt her stomach turn to lead as soon as she identified those voices.

Determined to intervene in this craziness, she took two steps forward only to immediately falter when she heard Dawson clearly say '_…you made that clear when you moved in on Joey.'_

Grimacing, she took one more step then heard Pacey's low growl echo off the building and through the lot.

_'For the very last time, Dawson, I made a mistake.'_

Paralyzed once more, this time by a debilitating blow to the heart, Joey stood unblinking as the rest of their conversation faded into incomprehensible noise.

_…I made a mistake._

He made a mistake.

Pacey made a mistake.

It was a mistake.

They were a mistake?

Unable to think or move or even breathe, Joey could barely fathom what she'd heard. Several heartbeats passed before she finally realized her proximity to the quarrelling boys. Fearing discovery, she took a breath to jump start her body and backed up before quickly turning on her heels and heading the way she had come; pancake flipper be damned.

Heart constricted painfully in her chest, Joey fled mindlessly through the streets of her small town. Eventually, she found herself at a familiar gate; the iron hinges creaked as she pushed through. It was only then that she became conscious of the moisture coating her face and her stuffy nose. She furiously swiped her eyes with her jacket sleeve and, sniffling loudly, made her way unerringly to the small plaque set flat in the ground.

Distraught, she fell to her knees with a sob. Drawing in a tremulous breath, she ran her fingers along the engraved stone, the date and name becoming a blur as once more the moisture pooled.

"Hi, Mom," she whispered and tried to smile bravely. "It's me. I know it's been a while." Her poor attempt at a smile broke. "I'm… I'm not doing so good."

And with that, the salty tracks increased to rivers down her cheeks. She shifted positions and drew her knees up, hugging them tightly to her chest, and dropped her head on top. She remained like that for a long time, gently rocking herself, repeating the words '_I don't know what to do_' over and over and over.

When she had exhausted herself, Joey lifted her head and let the evening breeze cool her heated face. Sinking to the ground, she laid on her back and looked up to the stars; searching for an anchor, she spoke to the one person who could no longer help her.

"I m-miss you, Mom. So, so much." The burning tingle in the back of her throat, signaling the onset of its constriction, caused her to swallow hard. "I-I've messed it all up, haven't I? I don't know what to do anymore." A sniff. "I don't have anyone to talk to." Another sniff. "I just… I just really n-need _you_ right now. I can't do this alone. I really need… I really need m-my mom. Oh, Mom." The sniff became a moan as Joey poured her heart out to the mother who had once dried her tears and held her as she spoke soothing words of love, reassurance and peace into her daughter's daily dilemmas.

How could she do this without her mother? How could she figure it all out? How could she grow up and do the right thing for everyone, including herself, when she had no one to help her sort it out?

Feeling adrift and torn apart, Joey gave way to her inner turmoil and let the snippets of Pacey's and Dawson's argument seep through her tired mind.

Maybe it was for the best that Pacey thought he made a mistake. Wasn't it better in the long run that they forgot all about the fluttering in their bellies and the warmth in their hearts when they were together? What's to say those feelings would last anyhow? After all, there was once a time when she thought her and Dawson would last forever. Everything about Pacey represented the unknown, unchartered territories. Things would be much easier for everyone if they simply went back to being… well, whatever it was before he'd kissed her, or maybe even before that.

Whatever that was…

She rubbed her forehead in an attempt to soothe the dull ache in her temples. If she could get past the devastated wasteland inside her to rouse enough rage, she'd be furious with him. He thought it was a mistake?! He'd been the one who kissed her first, for crying out loud! Made her analyze her feelings for him! Why hadn't he discovered his error sooner, huh?

No wonder he'd been keeping his distance lately. It was obvious that he'd not only moved on but was sorry he'd ever gotten involved with her in the first place.

How wrong she'd been about everything.

Of course, all things considered, she couldn't honestly blame him.

She had not stood up for _them_, after all. She'd been so intent on protecting Dawson and coddling their fragile friendship that she hadn't taken Pacey's feelings into account, at all.

She taken it for granted that he'd be the one constant in her rapidly changing world.

No wonder he finally realized what a mistake he'd made.

How could she expect him to think they were worth it, when she herself didn't think she was?

She had told him it was over. She had been the one to walk away. What did she expect him to do? He was just trying to salvage his relationship with Dawson.

After all, isn't that what she wanted, too?

She honestly didn't know anymore. It felt as though she was standing on the edge of a precipice only she didn't know which way to turn to safety.

If only someone could hand her all the answers; give her a sign as to what was the right thing to do.

Sighing deeply and sniffling one last time, Joey listened to the quiet sounds of the springtime night whispering peace to her troubled soul and allowed the breeze to dry her tears like the loving caress of her mother's fingertips.

*~*

Leaping onto the _True Love_, Pacey flung his gear on the deck and turned to cast off, in preparation for the sail back to his slip.

Will said nothing but watched him worriedly as they worked efficiently to get under full sail. Once they were safely out in the harbor, he perched on the bench next to where Pacey held the tiller. "She didn't mean it, you know. She doesn't really hate you."

Pacey's jaw had relaxed somewhat the further they travelled from shore but he didn't answer his friend and kept his eye steady on the course ahead.

Will allowed the sea to work its magic on Pacey's aching heart, and though it was by no means mended by the time the boathouse was in sight, his demeanor was less furious and more resigned. Will tried again, "You know, it's like the race today."

Pacey cocked an eyebrow at him as he expertly maneuvered the small craft toward its resting place.

"Sometimes even when true love has the right-of-way it has to swerve to avoid a collision," Will observed.

Pacey gave a pained smirk. "Will's words of wisdom, huh?"

Will grinned sympathetically. "Somethin' like that."

Pacey's return smile was more of a grimace as the _True Love_ bumped the dock. "Let's put her to bed, my friend."

*~*

Mitch Leery slammed open the door of the white clapboard house as he bellowed for his son. When he didn't receive an immediate response, he continued to shout, "Dawson!" until he heard footsteps pounding down the stairs.

Hair flopping in his face, Dawson regarded his father with curiosity. "Did you call me?"

"Did I call you? YES, I called you! Where have you been?" Mitch sputtered, red-faced.

Dawson looked puzzled. "Well… here."

"And you can't think of somewhere else you should have been?"

Realizing his father was upset about something, but unable to quite determine what that was, Dawson answered carefully. "At the restaurant?" he guessed.

"Dawson, are you so completely clueless that you didn't think that you had some responsibility to get Mr. McPhee's boat back to the marina and clean it up after the race?"

Washed out blue eyes slid sideways as he comprehended his error. "But, Dad, I had to go find Joey. She was so upset and I knew you and Jack were on board and…," he trailed off.

"Which brings me to my next question. What in the world were you thinking out there, son?! Your recklessness could have caused a collision that might have resulted in injury to everyone on board both boats. And if it weren't for Pacey and Will's expert skills, that's exactly what would have happened!"

Dawson's resentment began to rise. "He was in my way, Dad! Isn't the point of the race to win?"

"Did you even read the rules? Good God, Dawson, you've been watching the regatta since before you could walk. Have you ever seen one boat get in another's lane?"

Unwilling to admit his error, though he had _not_ won the race for that very reason, and in fact had been disqualified, he sulked, "I don't know."

"You know, Dawson, I actually admired you for going after what you wanted; for refusing to stand back and simply _talk_ about what you wanted. For taking action to make it happen. But what you did today, son, was just plain wrong. You put lives in danger to enact a fantasy. This isn't a movie, where the hero always wins because that's the way the script is written. This is real life where actions have consequences!"

Flapping his arms in exasperation, Dawson exploded. "What do you want me to say, Dad? I'm sorry? Then I'm sorry! Okay?! I was just trying to be the kind of guy that Joey wants!"

"Well, I can't imagine that Joey wants a guy who is irresponsible with other people lives and property." Mitch shook his head and sighed wearily. "You can plan on spending the next few days helping your mom with inventory at the restaurant. Off the clock."

As Dawson turned to shuffle away, Mitch added, "Hold on a minute, I'm not done. I think you owe Jack, Will _and Pacey_ an apology." He paused to let the weight of his words and Pacey's name take effect. "Jack didn't deserve to have you take advantage after he was kind enough to lend you his dad's boat. And whatever has happened between you and Pacey, trying to kill him was an inappropriate and immature response."

With his back turned, Dawson rolled his eyes and mumbled something as he started up the stairs.

Mitch cupped a hand to his ear. "What was that?"

"Yes, sir."

Stomping up the steps, Dawson thought he might say something to Jack but it would be a cold day in hell before he apologized to Pacey.

*~*

Still holding the wet plaque in his hands, Pacey watched Andie make her way back up the pier. She was right. Love was a pretty strong word. Maybe strong enough to overcome what seemed like insurmountable obstacles.

Will was right, too. Maybe true love sometimes veered off course in order to avoid a collision, but in the end it always won.

If he didn't give up.

Pacey understood the veering off course part, for sure. He and Joey had run into a roadblock, and while that roadblock may look like Dawson Leery, Pacey thought it might have a little more to do with the fear of letting go of childhood comforts and facing the unknown – with him.

Joey had said it herself not more than an hour ago, using the metaphor of painting to express her real emotions. She didn't _want_ to give up on them. She just wasn't ready to take action.

Whether or not she ever would be, Pacey didn't know; but he wasn't quite willing to give up on true love yet.

At least in theory.

Tucking the plaque under his arm, he dug around in the bench seat until he found his trusty tool box. Locating the screwdriver he needed, he set to work reattaching the nameplate to _True Love's _hull.

Some things, at least, were easy to mend.

*~*

Unable to watch Pacey walk away, Joey resolutely faced the expanse of bricks before her. He had surprised her by coming here tonight. He'd been wrong, though. She hadn't hoped that he was Dawson; she'd simply been surprised that he sought her out since she was sure he'd been avoiding her.

But she couldn't answer his question about soulmates and whether she'd ever love him the same way she'd loved Dawson. Because she would have said 'no' – she didn't want what she had had with Dawson; she wanted something _better_, something _more._

She just wasn't ready to admit that out loud to the one person who had the power to give her that and change her world forever.

Her eyes, darkened by dusk, roamed the length and breadth of the wall, tracing the rough brick patterns. She wondered if she'd ever be ready to… paint.

It was so big.

So overwhelming, even.

She might never be ready.

And, at least for tonight, she didn't think she was up to the challenge.

The wall was just too high.

What she really wanted was something familiar. Something comfortable. Something certain.

Something she knew how to do.

Making a decision, she picked up the paint can she'd set on the ground and headed to the one place where she knew what to expect.

*~*

Climbing that ladder seemed a little cowardly and, if she was honest with herself, a little childish. She knew Dawson's open invitation was fraught with unspoken expectations.

But, just for tonight, she didn't care.

Like she'd wished for at her mother's grave, she wanted someone else to _show_ her the answers instead of asking her to _give_ them.

And it seemed Dawson was the one to do just that. He was the only one asking something from her, telling her what to do, and making it perfectly clear he wanted her in his life and would fight for her. Her troubled soul didn't consider whether that was the right thing - whether it was better that someone give you the time and space and freedom of freewill - because right now she didn't have it in her to think it all the way through.

She was only human; and right now she was very weary and lost in a maelstrom.

She wanted a shortcut.

A quick solution to end all the pain.

Trapped in a fog of emotions, she wanted to curl up and comfort herself by escaping to memories of happier times.

And, so, she headed for the lighthouse that was the shining light through Dawson's open window.

She didn't stop to consider that lighthouses are not always a sign of safety; they are only there to warn souls of the dangers of the rocks and cliffs that surround them - that if you get too close, the swell will pull you in and never let go, destroying you until there is nothing left.

Sailors say that when caught up in a raging storm, sometimes it's best to stay away from the apparent safety of land – to not be too hasty in seeking shore but instead head out as far as possible and drop anchor, trusting in yourself and your vessel and to wait it out. Such that when the clouds eventually pass and the waves recede, you can see what was there in front of you all the time, waiting patiently for you.

Safe harbor.

Not all shortcuts are worth the risk; reaching safe harbor, however, is worth any wait.

*~*

**It Is What It Is** by Lifehouse

It is what it is  
I was only looking for a shortcut home  
But it's complicated  
So complicated  
Somewhere in this city is a road I know  
Where we could make it  
But maybe there's no making it now

Too long we've been denying  
Now we're both tired of trying  
We hit a wall and we can't get over it  
Nothing to relive  
It's water under the bridge  
You said it, I get it  
I guess it is what it is

I was only trying to bury the pain  
But I made you cry and I can't stop the crying  
Was only trying to save me  
But I lost you again  
Now there's only lying  
Wish I could say it's only me

Too long we've been denying  
Now we're both tired of trying  
We hit a wall and we can't get over it  
Nothing to relive  
It's water under the bridge  
You said it, I get it  
I guess it is what it I

Here it comes ready or not  
We both found out it's not how we thought  
That it would be, how it would be  
If the time could turn us around  
What once was lost may be found  
For you and me, for you and me

Too long we've been denying  
Now we're both tired of trying  
We hit a wall and we can't get over it  
Nothing to relive  
It's water under the bridge  
You said it, I get it  
I guess it is what it is

I was only looking for a shortcut home  
But it's complicated  
So complicated

*~*


	35. Author's Note 041710

A/N: Hmmm... Saturday, is it? How did that sneak up on us? No one wishes more than we do that we had an update to post. Alas, it is not to be. But rest assured, we're working on it and will be back just as soon as we can. Thank you for your continued support. We love y'all for it. ;)


	36. The Emerald City

A/N: Hope you have your tissues ready, everyone – this is our penultimate post for this ficlet series! Which means we're looking at **Anti-Prom** this week. Now, as Pacey himself has said – he knows how he feels, _Joey_ knows how he feels… the only person who doesn't seem to know how she feels is Joey. As such, we opted to delve into the mind of little Miss Potter for this ficlet, and try to figure out just what is going on behind those big, brown eyes.

As always, thank you so much for your feedback and support. I know we say it every time, but it honestly means the world.

************ The Emerald City **************  
****by M&M Works**

**Colbie Caillat ~ It Stops Today**

No, no, I, I, I, I, I don't want to break when I speak  
I don't want to shake while I'm standing  
I don't want to crawl into another hole  
I don't know what I'm hiding for  
No, I, I, I, I, I don't want to fall when I stand  
I don't want to have to hold your hand  
I just want to be the girl I use to be when I was me and worry free  
I know these burnings on my own

But I can't keep on running  
No I just can't keep on running away from here  
I know that the only way to be is to fight my every fear  
I'm not going to make it 'til I turn around and face it alone, I know  
I can't just keep running, no I just can't keep on running away  
So it stop today

So here I am, I'm taking my first step  
Thought I was losing balance but I caught myself  
I kind of like the challenge, no I don't need help  
I'm going to make it past the very start  
It's always been my hardest part

But I, I, I, I, I'm going to stay in control  
I must admit this crutch is getting old  
I am going to throw it out of my hand  
I'm finally here, I understand  
I know I'll get there on my own

So I can't keep on running  
No I just can't keep on running away from here  
I know that the only way to be is fighting my every fear  
I'm not going to make it 'til I turn around and face it alone, I know  
That I can't keep running, no I just can't keep on running away  
So it stop today

You can hide from all the pain  
But it will find you anyway  
Yes, I know, now I know

That I can't keep on running  
No I just can't keep on running away from here  
I know that the only way to be is fighting my every fear  
I'm not going to make it till I turn around and face it alone, I know  
That I can't just keep running, no I just can't keep on running away  
So it stop today

*~*

Crossing the Leery lawn to stand together on his porch, Joey had relapsed comfortably into habits ingrained by a lifetime of interaction with the boy at her side. It seemed that things were finally good between them. They were getting along, rediscovering their friendship.

She allowed herself to forget for a moment how her life had been turned upside down these past few weeks and relaxed around him. But not for long. Faint dread pricked at and coiled in her stomach when he took a deep breath and nervously stuttered his way through an unappetizing proposition.

"…there's an event… looming on the horizon. And, uhh, I seem to recall a certain pact made by two freshmen regarding said event."

Joey took a moment to collect her thoughts before answering cautiously, "Junior Prom. We both agreed that if we didn't have dates we'd go together."

"So you _do_ remember."

Another pregnant pause. "Are you asking me to prom?"

"I don't want to go with some random person and have it mean nothing. I want to go with my oldest friend. That would be something I'd want to remember."

"Or… we could both agree that it's a meaningless event and not go at all," she answered, laughing at the end to try and come off as carefree although inside she desperately hoped he'd concur.

"But it does mean something. I mean, there are a million reasons why proms are ridiculous and stupid. But we made that pact because it obviously mattered to us. It's a rite of passage. And I can't think of any better way to move forward, than to fulfill a pact made by two old friends and just have a good time."

It was on the tip of her tongue to just agree with him and go along with the idea. It would have been so easy to pretend to be naïve enough that his offer held no strings; that he really meant his words and he was doing this purely in the name of honoring their friendship.

About to open her mouth to reply, a fluttering from the corner of her eye snatched her attention. She shifted her gaze outside to the shrubbery running alongside the porch. There a huge, black butterfly danced through the air; its movements hypnotic as it gracefully rose and fell in a random line. Selecting a beautiful flower as a landing place, it opened itself up to the warm sunshine and slowly fanned its wings. With each closure, the almost unearthly iridescent texture of the butterfly's wings cast the sunlight in a glorious sheen, one strong enough to burn the retinas of Joey's eyes and leave an imprint.

Whatever she had been about to say dissolved on her tongue. Turning her head back to look him in the eye, she surprised Dawson – and herself a little, if the truth were told – when she airily but firmly replied, "You're right. It is a rite of passage, and we should go. But not together. I appreciate the sentiment… but, in light of recent events, it wouldn't feel right. Just because we've been spending a lot time together recently doesn't mean I've changed my mind about how I feel. I just… I really want everything to go back to the way it was, Dawson."

Taken aback, Dawson blinked at her, opened and then closed his mouth before blurting out, "But… um… what about our pact?"

She lifted a shoulder and looked appropriately apologetic but was saved from further debate by the interruption of an osculating Gale and Mitch. Making her excuses, Joey inconspicuously fled the way she had come; Dawson faded behind her as the mist seemed to rise from the creek and swallow her slender form.

**********

"Bessie? Besssssi_eeeeeeeeeeee_!" Joey slammed through the front door of the B&B, dropping her backpack on the nearest flat surface.

The bellowed name's owner came out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on a dish towel. "Geez, Joey! It's a good thing we don't have any guests right now! "

Ignoring her complaint, Joey's hands began to flutter. "I need a dress," she declared ominously.

At Bessie's curious look, Joey sighed and then launched into an explanation. "The Leery's are letting us hold an alternative prom at their restaurant." Building up a momentum, she released the rest of her words quickly, all in one breath. "Long story short… school prom wouldn't let Jack bring a guy as a date… we're holding our own prom instead… everyone's going." Refilling her lungs she closed with, "So… I need something to wear."

Seemingly out of thin air, Bessie produced a long, black gown with spaghetti straps and some type of chiffon-like scarf draped about the hanger. "Will this do?"

Joey winced as fragments of _On My Own_ and images of a starry-eyed Dawson crowded her memory, setting her head in motion with a definitive refusal. "No… no… _no_. That's just not me. Do I have other choices?"

"What about this one?" Bessie offered, holding up what appeared to be a simple grey sheath.

Tilting her head to one side as she studied the garment, Joey gasped when Bessie twisted the hanger and the garment shimmered and burst into color as subtle threads of green and blue and even red shot through the fabric and caught the light. Mesmerized by the magic of the material, she half-smiled and sighed her approval. "Perfect."

Her reverie was disrupted by Bessie's accusation, "You're not thinking of going with_ Dawson, _are you?"

"What? No!" Joey snorted.

"Good. Because I guarantee you, getting stuck in the middle of a tug-of-war between Pacey and Dawson would be the absolute worst thing you could do in your position," Bessie advised.

Suddenly, through the open window beside them a soft breeze blew, rippling the curtains and giving them life. Riding the currents of the breeze, Joey recognized the same huge, black butterfly from before come inside. It wasn't alone; this time it was joined by another butterfly, matching its size and color. The two played close to the window, darting around each other and twisting in and out of the billowing curtains. After a while, yet another butterfly appeared, joining in their game.

Eyes fixed on the butterflies Joey confirmed, "I have no intention of doing that."

Just as abruptly as it had appeared, the wind turned direction and died down; the butterflies vanished, as did Bessie. Joey was still looking at the vacant spot where the butterflies had been long after they disappeared.

In a now empty room, Joey whispered to herself, "I just really want everything to go back to the way it was."

**********

The restaurant glittered from floor to ceiling with the reflection of twinkle lights off glassware and silver on the tables and the disco ball above; speakers provided the top 40 pop chart as a soundtrack to the festivities.

Joey had carefully chosen her seat next to Jack, but that didn't prevent Dawson from claiming the other seat next to her at the table reserved for their group. An eye roll at his actions was all the energy she could muster. She smoothed down her dress and tried to relax. It wasn't easy. Every so often her eyes would betray her and she'd look around the room, her pulse thumping rapidly in anticipation.

She was waiting.

She wasn't even certain that he was coming.

But she hoped.

However, the heart that had been beating rapidly stopped in horror when Dawson cleared his throat and produced a small, black velvet box from his jacket pocket. Garnering the attention of the entire table, he opened the box with a flourish, revealing its contents. "I thought you could wear these."

"Diamond earrings? Dawson, I can't take these." Relieved that the box contained nothing more meaningful than adornments for her ears, she still felt a flush creep from her cheeks to her chest.

"Relax, they're my mom's. They're on loan. Like the Academy Awards. I thought they would look amazing on you," Dawson insisted, putting her in the position of either accepting or making a scene.

Lovely.

Joey shook her head, tendrils of hair escaping the French twist. "I can't wear them. I mean, what if something happens?"

"Something happens to what, your earlobes? Stop! Put them on."

Glancing at her circle of friends, she found them all watching her, fascinated as she struggled to assert herself with the persistent boy.

Smiling tightly, Joey slipped the earrings into her lobes and then, at the request of the table, she tipped her chin up, twisting her head from side to side so that all could see. At the final twist she found herself staring straight at the slight figure of a lavender-bedecked Andie clinging to the tall statue of her erstwhile paramour, who was heart-stopping in a tux.

Not a good night for her heart it seems.

"Oh, Joey!" Andie gushed. "Those earrings are fabulous! Wow, Dawson, who knew you had such great taste in jewelry?"

"They belong to Mrs. Leery," Joey rushed to explain. "She's only loaning them to me for the evening."

Standing unnaturally stiff and perfectly still, Pacey gazed blankly at the table while Dawson nonchalantly draped an arm on the back of Joey's chair.

No doubt sensing his unease, Andie pulled on Pacey's arm. "C'mon, Pacey. Let's dance."

Jen and Henry followed them, leaving Jack and Ethan, Joey and Dawson in an uncomfortable silence. Moments later Jack and Ethan were embroiled in a tense murmured conversation that was inaudible over the music. It ended abruptly when Jack excused himself. Ethan stared after him and then simply shrugged at his remaining tablemates. He ignored them then, leaning back in his chair to watch the dancers.

Dawson stood up and grabbed Joey's hand. "Let's dance."

"I don't–" Her protest was cut short, and she stumbled a bit when he tugged her into his arms and onto the dance floor. Over his shoulder she could see Pacey stare only to look quickly away.

"Now, isn't this nice?" Dawson insisted.

Joey held herself stiffly and hissed, "_What are you thinking?_"

"What do you mean?" Dawson replied innocently. "It's just Dawson and Joey, at the prom, having a good time. Okay?"

"No! It's not okay! You're acting like my date, Dawson. You give me those earrings in front of everyone so I couldn't say no without causing a scene. You drape your arm around me. Now you're parading me around as if we came together! I told you - I just really want everything to go back to the way it was."

"Joey, it's no big deal. Relax. We're just dancing."

"Right. _Just_ dancing," Joey said dryly. Shaking her head, she stepped back and palmed his chest as if to hold him at bay. "I need a breather."

Escaping to the pier outside the restaurant, her feet feeling as though they were walking on pillows, Joey found a kindred spirit in Jack. Their conversation gave her comfort, and when she said, '_I just really want everything to go back to the way it was', _Jack advised her that '_if you want things to get back to the way that they were, you have to set the example'._

Taking Jack's advice to heart, Joey went back inside. Spying him from across the room sitting there all alone at their table, she made her decision. Her footsteps slow but steady, she approached Pacey. Hooking one arm behind her, she placed the other on the back of his chair and leaned down.

"I've been meaning to ask you something all night, Pacey." She paused while he turned to her in wonder.

Studying his face as he blinked and swallowed, she reached for his hand, relishing the feel of his long, strong fingers when he entwined them with hers. "Would you like to dance with me?"

Pacey accepted her invitation, and with a soft, almost disbelieving smile he kept hold of her hand as she led them both to the dance floor. As they fit together and began to dance, he blew out a nervous breath and marveled, "How come this feels so right?"

Lifting her eyes from his tie to smile at him full on, Joey tried to ease her nerves and chuckled, "It was those dance lessons."

Pacey returned her smile at the memory and then lightly traced the shell of her ear, stopping to lift the diamond ornament with the tip of his finger. He shook his head. "They're not you." As though he was unable to stop touching her, he gently pulled a wisp of her hair, running his knuckles along her cheek until the strands slipped from his hand.

Shivers slithered down her arms at the contact. Defensively, she asked, "Why? Because I'm just a poor tom boy or…" She searched his face for the answers she always found there. "…'cause Dawson gave them to me?"

Pacey remained quiet for a moment then reassured her gently, "Neither. See this?" He lifted her wrist between them and slid his thumb beneath her bracelet. "This is you."

Joey's gaze shifted from her arm, where Pacey had gently begun to caress the twisted metal, to the warm, blue eyes that held hers as she listened intently. "It's not showy or gaudy." His voice deepened. "It's simple… elegant… beautiful." He slowly moved his fingers upwards and captured her hand once more, rubbing her skin with his thumb.

She dropped her head again and letting a painful smile grace her face, explained, "It's my mom's bracelet."

Pacey let out a small enigmatic laugh before moving his mouth to her ear. "I know," was his simple answer.

Drawing back to search his face curiously, Joey asked, "How do you know?"

Their conversation wound down memory lane; Joey became more stunned by every word until she asked in disbelief, "You remember that?"

Pausing, Pacey whispered, dipping his voice to a sexy rumble to confirm, "_I remember everything_."

Her heart overflowing with emotion, Joey perched her chin on Pacey's shoulder as he softly stroked her neck and back. Slowly swirling to the music, she saw Andie standing stricken at the side of the room. On the next turn, she caught the eye of Dawson as he made his way toward the dance floor. Tucking her head into the crook of Pacey's neck, she closed her eyes to their stares and exhaled softly against his warm skim, rejoicing in the feeling of safety when his arms wrapped tightly around her.

Joey's dress glimmered under the lights as they swayed together through the end of the song and beyond. When she finally opened her eyes and tipped her head to meet the endless blue pools of his, she imagined Pacey could see the colors of the material mirrored in her eyes.

He grinned widely, smoothing his fingertips down her arms. "You're back."

Joey gave him a crooked smile although her eyes were apologetic. "Well... I was never really gone."

"It kinda seemed like it."

Eager to remove the now sad look on his face, she stepped onto her toes and kissed him sweetly. Pulling back afterward she felt her heart soar when love replaced all other emotions in his eyes.

"_We're_ back," she corrected dreamily. She snaked her arm around his waist and they returned to the table.

Dawson sat watching them as they seemed to float toward him. "Hey," he acknowledged when they sat down.

"Hey," Joey replied cautiously, twining her fingers with Pacey's under the table.

In a rueful tone, Dawson began, "You know what? Joey and I gave it a shot and it didn't work out."

For some reason, Dawson was now wearing a sombrero. Nodding at Pacey, he said genuinely, "Why don't you give it a try? I've been an ass. You two are my best friends. I couldn't be happier for you."

"You mean that, man?" Pacey looked incredulous.

"I sure do."

Andie approached the table like a lavender wraith. "Hey guys, what's going on?"

Dawson grinned up at her. "I think we were too hasty giving them grief. They deserve their chance at happiness, don't they?" He pushed back his chair and offered his hand to Andie. "Wanna dance?"

A mirror image of incredulity, Pacey and Joey watched as their friends walked away. Facing each other, the reunited lovebirds grinned then leaned forward until their foreheads touched.

"Missed you, Jo."

"Missed you, too, Pace."

"How's about we blow this popsicle stand, huh?"

"Well, wha'dya have in mind?"

"Oh, just a little place I know where the soda's warm and the food is questionable, but the whole place is rockin'." He pulled his head back slightly and waggled his eyebrows.

Joey rolled her eyes and laughed delightedly. Carefully removing her earrings and placing them back home in the black box she asked, "Do I need permission to come aboard?"

Pacey pretended to think about it, laughing when Joey slapped him at the amount of time he was taking. "You? Nah." He looked at her then dead in the eye. "Sweetheart, you already know the answer." Pacey winked and held out his hand as he stood.

As she rose, Joey slipped her arms around his neck and stretched against him, sighing contentedly. Suddenly, the black butterfly reappeared and landed on the top of her hand. Frowning, Joey tried to shake it away but it wouldn't budge and remained steadfast. Opening and closing its wings mimicking a winking gesture, the glare from the reflection against the lights in the room caused her to squint and grimace. The next thing she knew, the room became filled with butterflies, all of them black. Hundreds of them swarmed around her.

She tried to call out to Pacey but he didn't seem to notice or hear her. Then the butterflies all came together and morphed into one huge, black puddle on the dance floor, seeping toward her shoes and threatening to swallow her up.

She tugged on Pacey's collar to warn him but the warm, living body beneath her arms became cotton-wrapped, feather-filled puffs and the twinkle of the disco ball turned into the steady brightness of the morning sun as it streamed through her window.

Blinking sleepily, Joey groaned at the sight of her bedroom in the harsh light of reality.

Desperate to regain the magic of her dream, she closed her eyes but it was no use. She was awake. Her black prom dress lay discarded in the middle of the floor; the angst of the previous evening flooded her consciousness.

A light knock on her door alerted her to Bessie's curiosity. "Jo, you up?"

"Come on in, Bess."

Joey scooted back against the headboard, her arms wrapped around her knees while Bessie took a seat on the edge of the bed next to her. "You okay?"

The blur between reality and her dream still muddling her mind, Joey shrugged. "I don't know… It was so weird. I had a dream. Everything was the same but so different. I didn't go to the prom with Dawson. And I wore a different dress. You finally gave me good advice. And everywhere I went, I kept saying, '_I just really want everything to go back to the way it was'. _Then Jack told me what to do and I danced with Pacey, and we kissed… and afterward Dawson told us we should try to be happy together. And then we were happy, so, so happy." Her tone had become wistful.

Bessie shook her sadly. "This isn't Kansas, Joey. Clicking your heels together three times isn't going to magically make everything the way it used to be. That's not even really possible; you know that, right? So, what really happened?"

"Dawson saw me dancing with Pacey, completely lost it… I left Pacey standing on the dance floor to go and run after him, and _then_ he… he kissed me."

Bessie's eyebrows shot up toward her hairline. "What was that like?"

Joey squeezed her eyes shut and rubbed her temples. "I felt something. Something innocent. Like a bittersweet memory. But nothing like what it feels like to kiss Pacey."

"Let me guess… Hot? Passionate? Toe-curling?"

Joey blushed but nodded.

Bessie sighed. "So whattaya gonna do now, Jo?"

Joey rolled her eyes and said dryly, "I was hoping at least that part of my dream would come true."

"Which part?"

"The part where you gave me words of wisdom."

Bessie reached out to stroke her sister's hair away from her face. "Any words of wisdom I may impart will never be wiser than the truth in your own heart."

She paused to give her words meaning. "The real question is… are you brave enough to listen?"

**********

**Goo Goo Dolls ~ Acoustic #3**

They painted up your secrets  
With the lies they told to you  
And the least they ever gave you  
Was the most you ever knew

And I wonder where these dreams go  
When the world gets in your way  
What's the point in all this screaming  
No one's listening anyway

Your voice is small and fading  
And you hide in here unknown  
And your mother loves your father  
'Cause she's got nowhere to go

And she wonders where these dreams go  
'Cause the world got in her way  
What's the point in ever trying  
Nothing's changing anyway

They press their lips against you  
And you love the lies they say  
And I tried so hard to reach you  
But you're falling anyway

**********


	37. Author's Note 052310

So... do you want the good news or the bad news? Good news is, we haven't forgotten about this story or you all. You can count on us that we WILL finish this, and that you will be seeing other work from us in the future. The bad news is, our lives are not are own right now. We desperately want to write but finding the time in our calendars... well, try as we might, it's simply not happening :( Please stick with us and we promise we'll be back as soon as we possibly can.


	38. Safe Harbor

**A/N**: So this is it, lovely readers! The moment has finally arrived. The sun has set. The fat lady has sung. The... OK, OK, you get it. We've reached the end of our ficlet series ;) What started out as a writing opportunity for us both at the beginning of last year, to stretch our creative writing muscles and enter into the land of fanfic, turned into... well, simply put one of the best experiences of our lives. Thank you for taking time out of your lives and sharing the journey with us; embracing our ideas and supporting us as we revisited Season Three. We can only hope we returned the favor by making you smile and maybe even introducing you to some new songs along the way. Hopefully you've enjoyed the ride just as much as we have taking you there. We couldn't have done it without you. Well... _maybe_ we could have, but it wouldn't have been nearly the same ;) LOL No, seriously, thank you all for sticking with us till the very end and being patient for this final ficlet. We hope to be back soon with a fresh story (this time a non-canon multiparter) but no promises as to when that will be. But until then, we plan to keep you entertained with various holiday fics throughout the year. But enough of that... back to the ficlet. Here's our take on the missing scenes for the final epi of S3 and how they got to that dock, making us all believe in the beauty of True Love and that it really does win in the end. So, for the last time, we give you **From One Harbor To Another**...

*******~* ****Safe Harbor *****~*********  
**

**- Monday's child -  
**

Halfway Gone by Lifehouse

You were always hard to hold  
So letting go ain't easy  
I'm hanging on but growing cold  
While my mind is leaving

Talk, talk is cheap  
Give me a word you can keep  
Cause you're halfway gone and I'm on way  
And I'm feeling, feelin feelin this way  
Cause I'm halfway in but don't take too long  
Cause I'm halfway gone, I'm halfway gone

I'm halfway gone...I'm halfway gone...

You got one foot out the door  
And choking on the other  
Always think something more  
Is just around the corner

Talk, talk is cheap  
Give me a word you can keep (you can keep)  
Cause I'm halfway gone and I'm on way  
And I'm feeling, feelin feelin this way  
Cause you're halfway in but don't take too long  
Cause I'm halfway gone, I'm halfway gone

If you want me out, then I'm on my way  
And I'm feelin, feelin feelin this way  
Cause you're halfway in, but don't take too long  
Cause I'm halfway gone, I'm halfway gone (wohoww wohoww)

I'm halfway gone, I'm halfway gone (wohoww wohoww)

Now I'm halfway gone, I'm halfway gone

Don't take too long  
Don't take too long  
Cause I'm on my way  
If you take too long

Cause I'm halfway gone and I'm on way  
And I'm feeling, feelin I'm feelin this way  
Cause you're halfway in but don't take too long  
Cause I'm halfway gone, I'm halfway gone

If you want me out, then I'm on my way  
And I'm feelin , feelin feelin this way  
Cause you're halfway in, but don't take too long  
Cause I'm halfway gone, I'm halfway gone (wohoww wohoww)

Cause I'm halfway gone, and I'm halfway gone (wohoww wohoww)

Cause I'm halfway gone, yeah I'm halfway gone

Warmth seeped into her fingers through the ceramic mug of steaming coffee while Joey stared blankly at the morning mist rising off the creek. Facing another day of finals, she figured she'd need every milligram of the caffeine she could ingest to stay awake during the tests, let alone get any of her brain cells to fully function.

She had not had a good night's sleep in weeks.

Night after night since the Alternative Prom, she had tossed and turned while wisps of dreams floated through her subconscious. Though Dawson in a sombrero had not made another appearance, many images were no less odd or fantastical.

_Pacey with a black eye patch as a pirate in a tux… the True Love in pieces on a rocky shore… Andie as a lavender mermaid singing from a rocky outcrop surrounded by the sea…_

Often in her visions she, Dawson and Pacey were separated by vast expanses of the ocean unable to reach or even hear each other. Joey struggled through the hip deep water desperately trying to reach them but made no headway. No matter how loudly she screamed or wildly she gestured both Pacey and Dawson stood mute, often with their backs turned toward her.

Two things were pervasive constants - the black butterflies and the fleeting moments spent in Pacey's arms. It didn't take a 4.0 average to figure out that she missed the warmth and closeness of their embraces; still she spent hours trying to dissect the meaning of those velvety lepidopteranswhile ostensibly studying for finals.

All to no avail.

Hadn't she read somewhere that black denoted death? But death of what?

Or whom? (Her stomach clenched around what felt like a boulder. She couldn't even go there.)

Death of a budding romance?

Death of lifelong friendship? Or two? Or three?

Or could it signify something more hopeful? The old cliché of where one door closes, another opens?

Her head hurt just thinking about it. She was too tired to give it a lot of thought this morning anyway; the only thing that urgently needed her attention was Mr. Sanders' trig test. With a quick glance at the clock she guzzled the rest of her coffee and got a move on.

* * *

With a yawn, Pacey stretched and scratched at the hair on his belly, wondering if there was really any point to taking his trig final. After all, his chances of passing hovered somewhere between slim and none, despite Joey's long-suffering, painstaking efforts to tutor him. Currently, and not surprisingly, he found that little about Capeside High, especially its academics, held his attention.

The sea was calling him.

His father was clear though; Pacey had to finish the year out before he could set sail.

That was one conversation he was glad to have behind him. He had briefly toyed with the idea of scooting out of town on the sly but the ever meddlesome Dougly Do-right effectively blew that plan right outta the water – so to speak. Imagine his surprise to find the elder Witter on the dock one day last week casting a critical eye over the only girl in his life Pacey could count on at the moment. Since the Witter patriarch hadn't even bothered to come to her christening, Pacey couldn't imagine what he was doing there.

_Determined to avoid antagonizing him right off the bat, Pacey put aside the hose he was about to use to wash down the boat and asked him pleasantly, "Hey, Pop! What brings you by?"_

_Squinting past his son, he ignored the question. "Is she seaworthy?"_

_Pacey shrugged, his eye line tracking his father's to rest on the bobbing boat. "I've had 'er out a few times with no problems at all. Came this close," he held up his thumb and finger, "to winning The Regatta this year."_

_John scoffed at his youngest and got right to the point. "So, she's never even been out of the bay and you want to sail her all the way to Florida?"_

_Murderous thoughts of fratricide skittered around the edges of Pacey's attitude as he tried to keep his demeanor in check. "She's solid. I've been workin' on her over at Mike Hannigan's yard and he's been double-checking me. Even Bud MacGregor took a look under the hatch when he towed her over here."_

_"I'd like to take a look myself."_

_It was the closest he was ever gonna get to his dad asking permission to come aboard so he stepped back and John helped himself to the grand tour after Pacey's attempt to guide him was discouraged with a withering look._

_He now knew that this little impromptu visit was going to determine his summer plans. Once his father had finished a detailed inspection of the engine, he joined Pacey against the railing and gazed out across the bay, his face betraying nothing._

_"The ocean's a lot different than this bay, son."_

_Pacey simply nodded; the familiar excitement of sailing welled up in his chest but he suppressed his smile._

_"Chart a course yet?"_

_"Yep." Almost without conscious thought, Pacey had begun to match his father's minimalist conversational style._

_"What about money?"_

_Pursing his lips and rolling them in a circle, he replied in an even tone, "I have some savings. Figured I'd pick up some odd jobs along the way."_

_"And school?"_

_"We're done end of next week."_

_John's eyes finally flicked toward the boy at his side. Pausing between each sentence, he calmly instructed, "Finish school before you leave. Get back before it starts in the Fall. Stay close to shore. Call home once a week." Then he added in a rush, "I don't want your mother to worry." And, with that, he pushed away from the railing and left without another word._

_It wasn't until he disappeared up the dock toward the road that Pacey heaved a sigh of relief._

Of course, Pops didn't say he had to _pass_ – just that he had to finish up his classes. With a sly smirk, Pacey hoped he would be long gone before grades came out.

Grabbing a number two pencil from the perfectly sharpened bouquet arranged in a holder on Doug's desk, he set out to obey at least the letter of the law.

* * *

**- Tuesday's child -  
**

All I Need by Within Temptation

I'm dying to catch my breath  
Oh why don't I ever learn?  
I've lost all my trust,  
though I've surely tried to turn it around

Can you still see the heart of me?  
All my agony fades away  
when you hold me in your embrace

Don't tear me down for all I need  
Make my heart a better place  
Give me something I can believe  
Don't tear me down  
You've opened the door now, don't let it close

I'm here on the edge again  
I wish I could let it go  
I know that I'm only one step away  
from turning it around

Can you still see the heart of me?  
All my agony fades away  
when you hold me in your embrace

Don't tear me down for all I need  
Make my heart a better place  
Give me something I can believe

Don't tear it down, what's left of me  
Make my heart a better place

I tried many times but nothing was real  
Make it fade away, don't break me down  
I want to believe that this is for real  
Save me from my fear  
Don't tear me down

Don't tear me down for all I need  
Make my heart a better place  
Don't tear me down for all I need  
Make my heart a better place

Give me something I can believe  
Don't tear it down, what's left of me  
Make my heart a better place  
Make my heart a better place

Watching in the rearview mirror as Doug's police car drove away, Joey snatched the seatbelt roughly and floored the gas pedal.

Her thoughts whirled, gradually spiking to anger…

_He's leaving? He's frigging _leaving_?_

_Without telling me?_

_That's just like him. He's so… how can he… he'd just… and what about…?_

_Urgh!_

_Leaving, huh? Well, we'll see about that…_

_

* * *

_

Throwing the candy bar wrapper into the brown paper bag, Pacey continued to stare moodily at the expanse of bricks.

His jaw clenched as his thoughts spiraled into irritation…

_I'm giving up? _I'm_ giving up?_

_Who does she think she's talkin' to? Hello, pot?_

_That's just like her. She's so… how can she…_

_Goddamn it!_

_Giving up, huh? I hate it when she has a point..._

_

* * *

_

**- Wednesday's child -  
**

Terrified by Katherine McPhee ft. Levi Zachary

You by the light is the greatest find  
In a world full wrong you're the thing that's right  
Finally made it through the lonely to the other side

You said it again, my heart's in motion  
Every word feels like a shooting star  
I'm at the edge of my emotions

Watching the shadows burning in the dark  
And I'm in love and I'm terrified  
For the first time in the last time in my only life

This could be good, it's already better than last  
And love is worse than knowing you're holding back  
I could be all that you needed if you let me try

You said it again my hearts in motion  
Every word feels like a shooting start  
I'm at the edge of my emotions

Watching the shadows burning in the dark  
And I'm in love and I'm terrified  
For the first time in the last time in my only

I only said it 'cause I mean it, I only mean 'cause it's true  
So don't you doubt what I've been dreaming  
'Cause it fills me up and holds me close whenever I'm without you

You said it again my hearts in motion  
Every word feels like a shooting star

Watching the shadows burning in the dark  
And I'm in love and I'm terrified  
For the first time in the last time in my only life

Walking home after the rehearsal dinner, Joey's perpetually twisted gut was somewhat eased by her confession to Dawson. It had taken every bit of resolve she had to admit that, if it wasn't for his ultimatum, she might have chosen differently.

Not that it changed anything.

Pacey was still leaving.

Dawson was still clutching at her.

Joey was still letting him.

She meant what she said though - she couldn't imagine her life without Dawson or his parents. The list of loved ones in her life was so short and so precious to her that she couldn't afford to just throw even one of them away.

_Except for Pacey._ She scowled at that tiny voice of indictment in her head as she pushed through the doorway into Molly's Market.

But as much as she'd like the chance to continue to explore the budding relationship with Pacey, she also knew that he wouldn't hold a grudge; that he wouldn't refuse to be her friend or force her to give up Dawson. He'd forgive her for hurting him.

In a word, she'd still have him in her life.

Maybe not in the way they both had hoped but…

Wandering toward the coolers for milk, she wondered distractedly if it was too late to check out his going away party. Not that she'd actually been invited, although the gravitational pull to go track him down anyway seemed to indicate a change in her true north. When Dawson had mentioned that she skip the rehearsal dinner, she'd reacted the only way she knew was acceptable to him. Plus, the Leery's were counting on her, she couldn't let them down.

No matter the cost to herself.

Joey's old friend, anger, had masked its allies fear and longing, such that it washed over her in waves at the news of Pacey's impending departure. Quite the opposite of wanting to shoot the messenger, deep down Joey had been grateful to Doug for his "advisory."

In his own way, she understood that he was rooting for them.

* * *

No regrets.

Mrs. Ryan had no regrets. She'd taken a chance, made her feelings clear to Thomas What's-his-name and had no regrets.

Doug had cautioned him against regrets, too.

Between those not-so-subtle warnings and the stricken look on Joey's face when she thought he was "giving up," Pacey took it as a sign to… well, paint a sign, and like Dougie suggested, spell it out to her in clear, unwavering terms.

That way, if he saw Joey's face in the stars while sailing, it would be because he dreamed of her, not because he was haunted by that look.

Except for never having actually said, "_I love you, Joey Potter_" he was sure she knew how he felt about her. How could she not? What he had posited yesterday was true; the decision for them to be together was all hers; but if she needed to know he wasn't giving up on "them," he wanted to make himself absolutely clear. He didn't suppose it would hurt to send out one last SOS, right?

After all, how could it hurt worse than it already did?

Retrieving a can of paint from the stash at the boatyard, Pacey made his way downtown where he stood once again before that expanse of brick with its plain white square canvas startling bright even in the residual rays of daylight. He could understand how it intimidated Joey. From where he was standing in that vacant lot the blank space to be filled seemed vast.

Since he had spent the better part of yesterday evening staring at that wall and he was on somewhat of a time schedule after his phone call to Bessie, he got right to work. Being neither poet nor artist, he decided on a straightforward heartfelt plea; hoping its simplicity would elicit a positive reaction.

Besides, he was tired of talking.

He only wanted to hear one word.

He _needed_ her to eradicate that image of their goodbye scene he'd prophesied earlier.

Just like he knew she was capable of doing, when they were aboard the _True Love_ and she raised those truly remarkable brown eyes to his, he wanted her to ask him to "stay".

* * *

Glaring at his back as he sauntered away leaving her with a half-used bottle of milk, she realized that he had effectively tossed the ball directly into her court.

Unfortunately, she didn't have a game plan. So, doing as Pacey bid her, Joey turned her head and stared at the wall.

Shoulders slumping a fraction, Joey could fool everyone but herself that she was furious with the boy who was leaving; but the person she had issued those jibes to while standing beside this very wall just yesterday morning wasn't Pacey.

They were to herself.

Because, as usual, she was paralyzed by fear.

Unable to make a decision; unable to let go of the one thing that was standing in their way.

As she committed the four little words to memory, gradually any residual anger she felt from her earlier accusations that he was running away, giving up, evaporated. The crushing need to rush after him and throw herself into his arms was tempered this time by an overwhelming wonder at this boy who really didn't give up.

Pacey was right when he reminded her that it had always been her decision to be together or not and that they were unfinished just like her wall.

But that was just it.

She wanted him to stay.

She _needed _him to stay.

But why did _he_ want to?

Why would someone as amazing as Pacey want someone as screwed up as _her_? She had nothing to offer him.

Her eyes bored into the still wet, red paint. He'd wanted her to ask him to stay.

But how could she?

She was already the reason why his childhood friendship with Dawson was in shambles. She couldn't ask him to give up the sea, too.

The question, as always - was she willing to lose Dawson to be with Pacey?

The bleeding paint mirrored the ache in her chest when she found couldn't answer _yes_.

* * *

**Thursday's child**

What If I by Ben's Brother

What if I'm wrong  
And you figure it out  
That we just don't belong  
And you're better off without me

The minute you're gone  
I bet it would dawn on me  
Suddenly, suddenly  
Yeah

So what if I  
What if I fall  
Would you hate me  
Would you let me go  
What if I realized  
That you're the only one  
Who makes me  
Who makes me whole

Blundering on  
Making no sense  
Without any thought  
To the consequences  
But one of these days  
The truth will be facing me  
And I will find a way back to you again, oh

So what if I  
What if I fall  
Would you hate me  
Would you take it all  
What if I realized  
That you're the only one  
Who makes me  
Who makes me  
Who makes me whole  
Yeah  
Who makes me whole now

What if I  
What if I find the thing that I want

The minute you're gone  
I bet it would dawn on me  
Suddenly, suddenly  
Yeah

So what if I  
What if I fall  
Would you hate me  
Would you take it all  
What if I realized  
That you're the only one  
Who makes me  
Can make me  
Who makes me whole

While it was true that Dawson used to be able to tell everything Joey Potter was thinking by looking in her eyes, she'd become adept at hiding the truth.

To spare him?

To spare herself his scorn?

Whatever her reasons, he hated it.

Pacey had declared him victorious, but the girl who danced so stiffly in his arms with barely-suppressed grief upon her face told a different story. Her eyes had been shielded from his searching gaze but it didn't matter. He'd seen her courage in the face of loss too many times before not to recognize it for what it was.

Her heart was breaking, and while he wanted to blame it all on Pacey, she'd made it clear during their chat on the dock the night before that it was his fault.

And he just… couldn't do it anymore.

Joey had asked him if he meant what he'd said in the best man's toast: _I think that that's really what love means; that you can forgive anything._ Though he'd meant every word with regard to his mom and dad, fleeting regret tinged the memory when he realized she was throwing his own words right back at him.

With a heavy sigh, Dawson knew – he just knew - that he needed to let her go; because what mattered most to him at that moment was what _she_ wanted.

And right now it wasn't him.

Even _he_ knew that relationship cultivated by manipulation wouldn't work out in the end; he had to let her go and find out for herself that she and Pacey would never work.

Dawson had turned her away the night of the stripper party because it wouldn't have been right for him to take advantage of her; he knew that it wasn't their time then.

Apparently, it wasn't their time now either.

Knowing Joey would never go to Pacey as long as he held his ultimatum over her head, Dawson exercised the most common of teen clichés; he set her free hoping that she'd come back to him someday.

Which was why he stood at the end of his dock, watching the girl that he'd always thought was his, fly away to seek the arms of his best friend. Being more than he could bear, he sank to the wooden floor in a heap, crumpling much like his face.

* * *

**Friday's child**

Someday by Lifehouse

You can go  
You can start all over again  
You can try to find a way to make another day go by  
You can hide  
Hold all your feelings inside  
You can try to carry on when all you want to do is cry

_[Chorus:]_  
And maybe someday  
We'll figure all this out  
Try to put an end to all our doubt  
Try to find a way to make things better now and  
Maybe someday we'll live our lives out loud  
We'll be better off somehow  
Someday

Now wait  
And try to find another mistake  
If you throw it all away then maybe you can change your mind  
You can run, oh  
And when everything is over and done  
You can shine a little light on everything around you  
Man it's good to be someone

_[Chorus]_

And I don't want to wait  
I just want to know  
I just want to hear you tell me so  
Give it to me straight  
Tell it to me slow

Cause maybe someday  
We'll figure all this out  
We'll put an end to all our doubt  
Try to find a way to just feel better now and  
Maybe someday we'll live our lives out loud  
We'll be better off somehow  
Someday

_[x2]_  
Cause sometimes we don't really notice  
Just how good it can get  
So maybe we should start all over  
Start all over again

Running in a dress wasn't what finally slowed Joey down; it was the sandals, which she was so unaccustomed to wearing. She crunched and slid along the gravelly edge of the road until she stumbled and stopped. Gasping for air, she regained her balance and, breathing heavily, continued at a more deliberate pace until she gave up any attempt at decorum and took the damn things off.

She wondered where she was running to anyway?

Earlier, from the corner of her eye, Joey had surreptitiously watched the tense exchange between Pacey and Dawson. Even without hearing what was said, she could almost fill in the blanks from their expressions and body language alone. Besides, she didn't need to hear the actual words; the three of them had been saying the same things to each other on a continuous loop for weeks now. Moments later she had seen Pacey hugging Gale and shaking Mitch's hand - then he was gone.

She knew she _had_ to find him.

Of course… first she needed to change. Call it stalling, but her inner tomboy wasn't about to go running around Capeside in a seafoam confection.

Yet even though an hour later found Joey comfortably clad in shorts and a tank top, she still wasn't moving in any direction; she was sitting at the end of her dock.

For, all that junk she'd told Pacey earlier that she needed to work through and didn't know how to begin to process? While standing in front of the mirror after she'd changed, she'd frozen under its weight.

The junk had decided for her it was time. Time to begin processing.

And so she'd let her feet lead her to the one place where she could think. Ironically, it was the exact spot where their saga had begun nine, long months ago when they weren't even sure they'd be friends.

Her palms dusted the sun-warmed planks of the dock as Joey gave way to her thoughts, pondering exactly what had transpired between her, Dawson and Pacey today… and indeed the past year.

Hurt and humiliation weren't at the core of her heavy heart though as they had been at the beginning of the year when she last sat here alone; the dull pain she felt right now was all her own fault. Pacey had done nothing but care for her, and still she couldn't bring herself to get up and go find him.

The bitter taste of self-hatred filled her mouth at that knowledge and her palms clenched into tight fists. Unable to stand the taste, she made an effort to change the direction of her thoughts, swinging her legs to help her relax.

Dawson hadn't promised that he'd forgive her - no matter what he'd said in the damn toast today. That sick twist in her gut kicked in again, telling her that their relationship would never be the same, causing the momentum of her swinging legs to jerk and slow.

There would be no going back after today's events.

No more climbing up that ladder.

No more deconstruction of the latest Spielberg film.

No more refuge from the storms in her life.

Of course, she'd had none of those things for a year now and somehow she'd muddled through.

_With Pacey by my side. _That tiny voice nagged at the edge of her consciousness again.

Suddenly frowning, Joey realized that Dawson had verbalized something she and Pacey hadn't even admitted to each other. His voice echoed through her memory, "_You love him like I love you. The only difference is he loves you back the same way."_

Pacey loved her?

Did she _love_ Pacey?

Chewing on her bottom lip, her legs now completely still, Joey realized that she couldn't move because _nothing had really changed_ since she told Pacey goodbye at the wedding.

What exactly was she going to say to him? _"Dawson told me to go to you; he thinks that I love you?"_ Cringing at the look she imagined those words might cause on Pacey's face; Joey dropped her head in defeat.

She couldn't do it. She couldn't go to Pacey because Dawson told her to.

He deserved more than that.

Her fists clenched again as she released she was getting nowhere in her search for answers.

Maybe Pacey was right; maybe she was going to get what she needed - three months to figure things out.

Drawing her legs up until her feet rested flat on the worn wood, Joey rested her chin on her knees and finally made a decision…

To wait until tomorrow to make one.

* * *

Rambling toward Doug's place, Pacey thought back to the goodbyes he'd experienced with the women he'd loved in the last few years. He was fairly sure that none were quite as anti-climactic as the one between Joey and him on the Leery's front steps. His last moments with Tamara had been heartbreaking and bittersweet. When Andie left for Mayfield, they had trembled in each other's arms. Compared to the complete lack of emotion Joey expressed before she turned and bolted, those particular partings ranked right up there with Rick and Ilsa in _Casablanca_.

Sighing tiredly, he let himself into the apartment and tossed his sports coat carelessly on the back of a chair. Doug was working the night shift and had neatly stacked the last of Pacey's gear by the door. Seemed the deputy was just as anxious to see his little brother leave as said sibling was to go.

Plopping down on the couch that had been his bed for the past year, he flipped through the channels seeking one last night of mindless distraction. Starting the next day, he would be entertained by the wonders of the sea and the sky; nothing that required an electrical outlet. Excitement about his departure warred with the grief of losing Joey for good this time but he pushed it down, determined to be done with it.

For Pacey had a new adventure ahead of him, and it was gonna be great.

And if he did see a certain face in the stars each night, so be it. He had no regrets.

The itch to leave that night was strong but the sailor in him knew that night sailing on his first day out was probably ill-advised. No, he'd get a good night's sleep and leave at sunrise tomorrow; maybe he'd even get up and go stretch out on Doug's bed and spend his final night on land in comfort.

It was the last thing he remembered thinking before he drifted off to sleep.

* * *

**Sunday's child**

Tailor Made by Colbie Caillat

Twenty-five,  
All of these mixed emotions,  
Tangled up in pure confusion,  
It's hard to let go of the past, but it seems,  
Easier as time is moving,  
Well you said he makes you laugh,  
And he makes you happy,  
He sees you smiling back,  
It is everlasting,  
And so he's tailor made for you,  
With stunning golden hues,  
And one sweet tone to soothe,  
Your persistent beating heart it's just a start,  
And I, have seen you every day,  
You've never been like this before,  
He's tailor made, tailor, tailor made,  
So let go all of these mixed emotions,  
Forget all your hesitations,  
Together entwined inside this feeling,  
Feet off the ground, head hits ceiling,  
Then he whispered in your ear,  
He's absolutely falling,  
The words he said are clear,  
So don't insist on stalling  
Because he's tailor made for you,  
With stunning golden hues,  
And one sweet tone to soothe,  
Your persistent beating heart it's just a start,  
And I, have seen you every day,  
You've never been like this before,  
He's tailor made,  
Oh sister, don't be troubled,  
Oh sister, please be calm,  
Cause this isn't, what you're used to, at all,  
He's tailor made for you,  
With stunning golden hues,  
And one sweet tone to soothe,  
Your persistent beating heart it's just a start,  
And I, have seen you every day,  
You've never been like this before,  
He's tailor made, tailor, tailor made

Shimmering butterflies lit upon her fingers as she lifted her arms in wonder. The mass of wings lifted delicately from her skin and flew forward a few inches, hovering in place as if waiting for her. Curious, Joey tipped her head sideways. These ethereal creatures had become so much a part of her nights that she didn't even question their meaning but simply reveled in their presence.

Forward and back they flew, urging her, until she took a step. Wispy flutters of encouragement repeated the process until she understood that she was to follow them. Gently they led her through the twilight of her dream until they reached the sea where they floated around her in a comforting cloud, occasionally alighting upon her, the quiver of their wings like angel's kisses.

There she stood on the edge of the world until the tide shifted and water slithered around her feet. A splinter of the sun peeked over the edge of the world with a sliver of black-edged ginger when the cloud of butterflies that had held vigil with her rose and scattered in the early morning sky, free.

Then Pacey's voice rumbled across her subconscious.

_I know how I feel. YOU know how I feel. That much is obvious by now. But during this whole process, we've managed to miss the point. Because the point is not how I feel. It's how you feel. So how do you feel?_

Now fully awake, Joey sat up and gasped, her eyes wide open.

Pacey was right! She _knew_ how he felt. Never had she doubted how much he cared for her.

It was in that moment, as visions of her butterflies faded, she realized she knew - _really_ knew - how _she_ felt. The knowledge that she had denied herself for so long became crystal clear as memories of the past year came flooding forward, rushing into each other…

_The steady weight of his arm slung across her shoulder as she cried over Dawson… his rolled eyes and exaggerated sigh as they walked along the road cutting school… the pencil sketch he drew of the B&B… a bead of sweat running down his neck as they repaired the _True Love_… the sawdust in his hair as they toiled side by side on the B&B… his support on Principal Green's campaign… the tip of his tongue as he worked diligently on their homework… the image of his breath as it met the cold, winter air when he first showed her their wall… his heavy foot on her toes as they danced… the teasing in his voice when he left her stranded in the attic… his unfailing patience as he taught her to drive… all the long, deep kisses they shared on their log, in the boathouse… the absolute agony of their moonlight sail… the feel of his fingers against her skin as they brushed her mother's bracelet… the way he looked at her with those unfathomable, smiling, ocean blue eyes – looking so deep he saw the real person inside, with all her flaws and imperfections – and still wanted her…_

She _loved_ him.

No. She was _in love_ with him.

Joey Potter was in love with Pacey Witter.

The butterflies had led her to a place where she stood protected until she understood their message. Their meaning was not death but love and the freedom that comes from letting go.

Even the two boys who knew her best could see what she had been too afraid to admit.

She couldn't wait a moment longer. She had to go find Pacey and tell him. She had to see him _now_. Whether or not he stayed, he deserved to know the truth; she couldn't let him leave thinking she didn't love him.

The night was only a shade lighter than black through the gap in her bedroom curtains as she simultaneously slid into a pair of jeans and sneakers; her heart beating wildly, she grabbed the first top she touched in her closet and threw it on as she rushed down the hall and ran out the back door, praying she wasn't too late.

* * *

A streak of red caught his eye as Doug maneuvered his squad car slowly through the residential neighborhood in the dim pre-dawn light. Brown locks streaming behind her, he thought he recognized Joey pounding the pavement toward the harbor.

Flashing his lights at her, he pulled alongside the running girl and rolled down the passenger window. "Going somewhere, Miss Potter?"

Barely pausing to speak, Joey huffed out, "Not now, Doug! No time!"

Following slowly to keep abreast of her, Doug called out, "Need a ride?"

Realization dawned across her features as Joey slowed to a halt, Doug mirroring her action with the car.

The automatic locks clicked open and she jumped into the passenger seat, breathing heavily.

"So…Where to, Joey? Headed to the marina by any chance?" He smirked.

Still gasping a bit for air, Joey just nodded. As Doug eased slowly down the street, she wondered if she couldn't have just run faster and turned to him with a pleading look.

His face impassive and unreadable as always, Joey only knew he'd obliged her unspoken entreaty when she felt the vehicle slowly gain speed, rolling quickly but cautiously through the quiet Capeside streets.

"He hasn't left yet, has he?" she finally ventured to ask.

"Seeing as how the sun has barely cracked the horizon and we're talking about a guy who hasn't seen this side of dawn since the night he spent in jail, my educated guess is _no_. But I've been on patrol all night and haven't seen or talked to him."

Not wanting to take any chances, Joey verbalized her urgency, beseeching him, "Hurry, Doug. _Please_."

Doug chewed the inside of his cheek in a gesture so reminiscent of Pacey that Joey knew he was debating with himself.

Coming to a decision, he glanced at her and said gently, "Do you know what you want now, Joey? Because if you don't, I think I should just take you home."

Embarrassment flooded her cheeks pink as she realized that Doug was protecting Pacey – from her! Pushing past her discomfort at discussing this with him, she nodded firmly, leaving her chin slightly elevated after the gesture. "I know what I want, Doug."

The small voice inside her whispered, "_I've always known…_" She had just been too scared to admit it to herself.

Doug smiled, satisfied. It looked like one of his advisories was finally paying off.

Practically before he stopped, Joey was out of the car as he pulled up to the edge of the marina parking lot. He leaned back in his seat, peering through the windshield and watched as she skittered down the dock frantically calling Pacey's name.

The romantic in him couldn't help but feel a little choked up at the thought of those two crazy kids finally getting it right. He cleared his throat and coughed, unable to admit that the tightness he felt might just be at another thought – the one where he'd miss that punk little brother of his this summer.

* * *

Surprised to hear, of all people's, Joey's voice, Pacey came out of the boathouse to find her darting about calling his name. He'd been making his final checks, ensuring he had everything he needed on board and hadn't left anything behind. It was the third time he'd been inside the boathouse to do this; a niggle lingering inside him as though he was forgetting something important. But seeing Joey, and with all the rush of emotion – the joy twinned with pain – that her presence brought, he was anxious to leave and be damned if he was forgetting anything he needed.

Guarding his heart at his unexpected visitor, he played it cool, calmly untying the knots that fettered the _True Love_, stepping around her as she talked excitedly, her hands fluttering.

But as Pacey bent to untie the last knot, his back to the girl he once said was so beautiful it gave him butterflies, Joey realized she was losing him. An intense look of concentration and determination crossed her face as she pursed her lips, made a decision and whirled to face him.

Her courage gathered, she said clearly, "I think I'm in love with you."

For fear she'd evaporate if he turned toward her, to prevent himself from closing the distance between them to take her in his arms - or maybe just to confirm that this fickle girl who owned his heart wanted him to own hers - Pacey paused, and without looking at her, asked for clarification, "You think or you know?"

She smiled to herself that even now, he was challenging her. "I know," she confirmed in a steady voice.

And just like that Joey Potter made an unequivocal statement followed by a persuasive argument stemmed from a really beautiful, pure place, absolutely sure of herself for the first time in weeks.

Pacey smiled at that while his heart lifted and soared, the cracks and bruises healed by her confession. Elated, he drew closer to her and asked, "What are we gonna do here, Jo?"

The morning music of seabirds merged with the slap of water against the hull of the boat as she only momentarily considered her answer. The idea of staying in Capeside for the summer without Pacey was unacceptable to her now. Impulsively, she took the second biggest leap of her life, as she decisively declared her desire, "I want to come with you."

Stunned was too mild a word to describe Pacey's reaction as he considered, and then debated her request until she countered his questions with the one admission that almost made his knees buckle. "Not as much as I need you, Pacey."

That elusive niggle in his heart that he was forgetting something dissolved. For now he truly had everything he needed.

Taking a moment to compose himself, sniffing away the moisture that had welled and clearing his throat, Pacey grinned and shook his finger at her when she tried to board_. _Though she had as much blood, sweat and tears invested in the vessel as he did and though she'd already shared her maiden voyage with its captain, this was a new phase of the small craft's life - a whole and happy phase. He thought perhaps they should start from the beginning and get off on the right foot.

And just like she did all those months ago from the bottom of a ladder perched against her hull, Joey acquiesced. Holding out her hand, she repeated the very same request. "Permission to come aboard?"

"Permission granted," he agreed with only the slightest hitch in his voice.

Taking her hand, he guided her aboard and then they were finally, _finally_ touching. Passion welled within them spilling onto each other through happy kisses. They didn't know whether to laugh or kiss or weep with joy.

What they did know was that somehow - from sitting side-by-side as barely friends on the edge of one moonlit dock, to standing together in love at the end of another under the glow of the morning sun - they'd found safe harbor in each other's arms.

* * *

A satisfied sigh escaped Doug as he watched the _True Love _sail into the sunrise, knowing he had just witnessed the beginning of one of the greatest love stories of all time. Whether smooth sailing or stormy weather lie ahead, he was confident that together they'd see it through. For what better foundation for a relationship than three months alone with no one to interfere and no one to depend on but themselves?

Watching as the small vessel became a mere pinpoint on the horizon, it occurred to him how early it was and reached for his cell, assuming _this_ call had been forgotten in the excitement. "Bessie? It's Doug…"

*******~*** **From One Harbor To Another *****~*******

**THE END**


End file.
